Beware Dean's foul language!
Chapter 3
Castiel was disheartened when he went back to the motel room and saw that Dean and Sam were nowhere to be found. Something bad had to happen, he knew his friends wouldn't have left without telling him, specially when he was supposed to come back with Kelly Kline after she calmed down a bit. The disarray of the room only added to his suspicions about a possible struggle. He tried several times to call the brothers, but they didn't answer. That means they were either in danger or somehow unable to pick up the damn phone, which was never a good sign.
Not knowing what else to do, Castiel returned to the bunker. There he met with the newest addition to the family, Jessica, wearing another set of too big clothes and eating a bowl of cereals.
"Castiel?" she recognized immediately the distress on the angel's face. "What's wrong? What about the Devil? Where's Sam?"
"Lucifer is back in the Cage," he informed her. "We succeeded in our endeavour, but some sort of mishap happened while I was out. I... I lost track of the pregnant woman, and then Dean and Sam disappeared."
"Disappeared?!" Jessica squeaked, her breakfast forgotten. "Ok, listen. I-I admit I'm still trying to fit back in life, and I don't know anything about this supernatural world you all are so immersed in, but... but even here, disappearing can't be a good thing, right? Please, tell me I'm wrong, that this is just some strange but usual occurrence and there's nothing to worry about."
"My apologies, Jessica, but I would prefer not to start our possible future friendship with lies," Castiel said apologetically, looking down.
There was silence for a minute, none of the two strangers knowing what to say to each other.
"So, well... what's the plan? When this kind of thing happens, which I'm getting the feeling is quite a lot, what do you guys do?"
"Most of the time, we try to deal with it ourselves in the best way we can, which is not actually very good on the long run. But when things take a turn for the worse, we also deal with it."
Jessica looked seriously at the angel, like expecting to hear it was a joke, a bad joke. But he didn't say anything else.
"That doesn't sound healthy in the least. It's more like a vicious circle."
"Well, we..." Castiel surrendered to the truth. "Yes, in reality it is."
She took again the spoon and stirred the already soggy, unappetizing cereals in the bowl. She used to do that, an easy automatic motion, whenever she felt distraught. Castiel felt bad for barely knowing her a few days and being already the bearer of such discouraging news.
"I will find them, Jessica," he tried to cheer her up. "Dean and Sam, safe and sound. We have gone through many adventures together, and somehow we have managed just fine until this point, more or less. Eventually, everything always seems to sort out. Have faith."
"Thanks, Castiel," she acknowledged him. "I just feel so helpless, and useless too. Is there anything I can do?"
"Jessica, you have just come back from the dead. Nobody is expecting you to do anything except to get back on track with your life, and even at that, I am confident Sam intended to help you with."
She let a flash of a smile grace her lips, praying that her new angel companion wouldn't be wrong, and Sam would come back uninjured.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Six days*. It had been only six damn days and Dean already felt bored out of his fucking mind! He needed to get out, really needed to get out. Being alone with himself was the worst that anybody could do to him. Those heartless bastards... how was he supposed to ignore all the shit in his life when he only had himself to be entertained? Oh, Chuck bless that bolt he was able to take out of the cot. It had helped him to connect with his inner artist, because those six lines on the wall looked absolutely awesome, mind you.
Had Sam found any bolt to play with too? Dean hoped so, although knowing his nerdy brother... he probably was entertaining himself reciting the Periodic Table or the Constitution Amendments. He had tried to do the same with all the Vonnegut books he had read in his life, speeching his opinion on them to himself, and even tried to hold an argument defending the opposite. That made Dean realize two things: one, he wasn't that great of a speaker for anything not related to the supernatural; and two, he was one bitchy oppositor. He barely had let himself talk before interrupting himself!
Anyway, Dean had stopped before he felt the need to punch himself just so he would shut the fuck up. That probably was the sane thing to do.
And Cas? Oh, the poor angel was surely worried sick about them. Dean laid down on the bed, looking at the ceiling, trying to make out his best friend's face in the boring grey metal. He imagined him running around, desperate to find the littlest clue about why they weren't in the motel room when he came back, and why they weren't picking their phones. A small chuckle escaped his lips, and Dean felt kinda bad for it. He couldn't help it, but knowing Cas was out there looking for him- ahem, for them, never failed to bring a warm, soothing sensation to his heart. It was nice to know that someone out there still cared, and he knew Cas did. Sometimes he even cared way too much, completely forgetting to look out for himself.
Man, Dean hated when Cas did that. Somebody should teach that pigeon to love himself a bit more.
At least he had prayed to him, to let the angel know that he and Sam were unharmed. Such a pity he didn't have the slightest idea where the hell they were, thus making impossible for his friend to help them get out of these fucking cells. Sometimes, the carvings in their ribs were more annoying than helpful... but of course, he wasn't going to say that to Cas, specially when those artistic graffiti also kept the other angels at bay.
Whatever, six days were more than enough to commiserate oneself, and Dean was already fed up with it. They needed a plan to escape, and he... he just had an idea. Once again he started to pray, but it was to another completely different being this time.
"Hey Billie, this is Dean Winchester. You there?"
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Castiel was barely less than ecstatic. He had received a call from Dean, finally! It had despaired him not be able to reach his human charges, but hearing Dean's prayers had helped him to keep it together. And after six days of uneasiness, the brothers had finally taken the matter in their own hands and made an escape. Fortunately, because that unholy-son-of-a-witch of Crowley hadn't bothered to move a single finger when Castiel swallowed his pride and asked for his help. Apparently, the King of Hell wasn't in the least worried with the case of MIA Winchesters, laughing it off as a mere joke. And look at this, he had been right. Figures.
"Jessica!" Castiel shouted the moment the set a foot on the stairs, the joy evident in his voice. "Jessica, where are you? Dean has called me!"
But the woman didn't answer. She was probably wandering around the bunker, getting comfortable in the odd settlement, so Castiel looked for her. He started on the bedroom that Sam had assigned to her, but she wasn't there. He proceeded to the showers and knocked on the door, but no response was heard. He was about to call out for her again, when right after turning a corner, he found her standing in front of Sam's bedroom closed door.
"Jessica, what are you doing?" he went to her side.
"I miss Sam," she answered with a strained voice, gently caressing the wood. "It's strange, you know. I've been alive only a week and a half, but somehow... all those eleven years that I was dead still weigh in my heart. During the few days we were together I mostly slept. Isn't it stupid? Anyone would think that after so much time 'sleeping' I should be full of energy, but instead I was tired. I felt so, so tired."
"It is not stupid," Castiel tried to offer comfort. "Human souls are lightweight, pure tamed energy. They do not carry the burden of cells, and they do not have any physical functions. Having to make all of that work again sounds like no small effort. I was basically human a couple of times, so I know."
"Thanks, Castiel," Jessica smiled a little. "It's nice to have such a kind angel like you here with me. I'm glad I've had the chance to meet you."
Now it was the angel who struggled to let his voice out, which didn't go unnoticed by her.
"What's the matter? Did I say something wrong?"
"No, not at all. It is only that... it has been some time since anyone told me they were glad to have met me. It seems like a very... very long time."
"Why? But I thought you've been friends with Sam and Dean since several years already. Aren't they happy too?"
"I did not mean it like that," Castiel tried to explain. "I know they feel affection for me, that they consider me an important friend, but sometimes... There have been times when I believed that they were just withstanding my company, due to all the bad things that I have done. Thus having another human who I have just met telling me that you are happy to become my acquaintance... it makes me happy in return. Very happy."
"Castiel," Jessica spoke softly, holding one of his hands in hers. "There are still many things that I must learn and understand about this lifestyle, but among everything that Sam has told me about you, the one he repeated the most is that you only did what you thought was truly right. Sometimes you were wrong and it ended bad, but you 'always had your heart in the right place', quoting Dean's words."
Castiel felt reassured by the woman's and the brothers' faith in him, specially by the Righteous Man's.
"I appreciate the sentiment, Jessica."
"You're welcome. Now, were you looking for me?"
"Oh, yes! This is not time to lose in idle misconceptions. I have to pick up Dean and Sam in Colorado!"
The angel hastily turned back, intending to leave immediately, and forcing Jessica to jog after him.
"The WHAT?! How do you know they are in Colorado? Did you find them?"
"Not exactly. Dean has been praying to me, but he did not know where they were being held, making it impossible for me to locate them. But somehow, today they succeeded in making an escape and called me by phone. Their instructions were not very specific, but enough for me to be able to reach them, or so I hope. I wanted to inform you before I take my leave."
"What are you saying, 'taking your leave'? I'm coming too, of course!"
This made Castiel stop dead in his tracks, causing Jessica to bump onto his back.
"Jessica, I highly advice you against this course of action," he spoke serious.
"That's too bad, because I don't remember asking for your advice," she insisted, rubbing her nose. "I said I'm going with you and that's final."
He sighed in exasperation at the human's stubbornness, but he recognized the signs. All his human experiences had taught him that it would take less time giving in and allowing her to tag along than to try to reason with her, and time was precious at the moment. He just hoped Sam wouldn't be too furious with him.
"Very well, if so you wish. But we will need to make a stop in a fashion shop first." He gave her a look up-down before turning tail again and take route to Dean's bedroom. "I will search some false credit cards in Dean's room, you do the same in Sam's."
"Yes, sir!" Jessica playfully agreed before her brain completely registered the command given. "Hold on, what do you mean 'false credit cards'?"
"A hunter's life is hard and unforgiving. In order to survive, there are times when they have to make use of... questionable resources."
His voice and steps got lost in the distance, leaving her dumbfounded in the hallway.
"Oh my... Has my puppy become a scammer?"
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Many hours and many kilometres later, Dean was sulking in the backseat of Cas' Lincoln, with said angel pouting beside him. Jessica was just too happy that she still remembered how to drive, and Sam was attempting to make small chat. However, the mood inside the car was too sour for that.
After escaping the secret site and playing hide-and-seek in the woods with the secret corps, Dean and Sam had found the road. They walked seven or eight kilometres before finding a road sign that said 'Kilometer 90'. Then the older hunter had prayed to the angel and told him their exact location, and barely half an hour after, the four of them were reunited again. Castiel had gone back to the site and wiped the memories of everyone implicated in the Winchester case, giving them a blank slate once more. Or that was what Jessica and the seraph thought, because Dean hadn't had the heart to tell them how exactly he and Sam got out. But a deal was a deal, and at the appointed hour of midnight, the car had stopped on its own and Billie stood proudly in front of them.
But now Billie was dead. The reaper that they had made a blood deal with, because Castiel had killed her. And Dean was paranoid about the 'cosmic consequences', because c'mon, nothing like that is ever good. Not for them at least.
The worst part, though... The hunter trembled inside his skin just thinking about it. It hadn't been him to break the deal, because when he called Billie for help, he had every intention of doing his part; and it hadn't been Sam either, because... yes, he had dragged his little brother into the plan, but never planned of allowing him to die in his stead. Dean was the one who was going to say goodbye once and for all, until... until Cas stabbed the reaper and broke the deal. Not him, not Sam, but an angel who had no part in it and still interfered. That was why Dean was currently looking at the night through his window and not paying the littlest attention to his feathered friend.
Cas. Cosmic consequences. That couldn't lead to anything good.
Again. Once again he had forced his best friend to take drastic measures in order to protect them, to protect him. Dean closed his eyes and rested his forehead on the cold glass. He simply couldn't stop, right? When was he to finally learn that for Cas, his own safety was always second to the Righteous Man's? How many times did the angel show how much he meant to him? And still, Dean had stupidly thought that he could simply die and Cas would be ok with it, right?
Dean wasn't even sure who he was angrier with, himself or Cas. But he knew he was going to sulk about it for a while yet.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Sam was looking randomly at the shelves in the library, wanting something light to read before bed, when Jessica walked in. After spotting her, he immediately grabbed whatever book it was and sat in one of the luxurious armchairs, feigning to be busy with some research. Seeing this, the woman sighed with sadness.
"Please, Sam, stop doing that."
Her tone was hurt. Sam looked up to her, frowning in confusion.
"Doing what?"
"Feigning that you haven't seen me, or pretending to do anything else so you can avoid talking to me," she explained, sitting on the armchair in front of Sam's.
"I haven't..." he started, but she was right, and he was tired of it too. "Yes, I had. I-I'm sorry, Jess. I didn't mean to hurt you, it's just... with everything that's been happening lately, first with Lucifer and his baby, then that poor woman killing angels in revenge for his daughter, and then Dean losing his memory, and... Haa, it has been a really crappy month."
"I guess it was. Though, if I'm not wrong, that's pretty much how you roll now, Mr. Hunter."
Sam allowed himself a little smile, putting down the random book on the small table next to him. Sometimes he still couldn't believe she had really come back to life, to him. That he really could stretch his hand and caress her face, hug her body, kiss her lips. He was afraid to give in and believe that she was real, only to suddenly wake up and discover it was all a dream. Or perhaps another one of his hazy delusions.
"That mini-skirt looks good on you, by the way."
"Oh, I'm glad to hear someone else thinks the same," she chuckled. "Because when I went shopping with Castiel, he asked me if I was sure that this was 'an appropriate attire to display in public', air-quotes and all."
"I should've gone shopping with you on the first day," Sam said, dejected. "Sorry, it slipped my mind again and again. There always seems to be something that I need to take care of, and..."
"Sam, it's ok. It doesn't matter anymore," she reassured him, taking one of his hands. "I understand now why you never told me anything about your family, or your past. However, there's something that I've..."
She paused mid-sentence, because Sam had taken her comforting hand in both his and gripped tightly. He scooted closer to her in his armchair, elbows on knees, and closed his eyes, holding her hand in a prayer-esque gesture, his forehead bowed down.
"Every day when I see you," he whispered, "I still need to convince myself that you're real, and not a figment of my imagination going amok."
"Please, hear me out, Sam." Jessica tried again. "Since I've arrived here, I've had enough time to figure out a few things, and you deserve to know them."
"Like what?"
"I've been selfish, you big puppy," she said tenderly, patting their interlaced hands with her free one. "The moment I first saw you in this bunker, I wasn't aware of what had happened, how much time had already passed. I thought everything was still the same, that we were still the same... us. But it isn't, and we aren't."
"Jess..."
"Don't deny it, Sam." She sighed deeply, her eyes starting to prickle with wetness. "I know you've been busy with this crazy life you lead now, but... you never try anymore to get close to me, you barely look me in the eye, and it's difficult for you to even hold a real conversation with me. Look, I understand it, ok? It has been more than a decade for you, and I don't blame you for moving on and starting a life with another person. What I mean with this is... that I don't feel I should stay. My presence here bothers you, like I'm getting in your and your brother's way, and..."
She couldn't say anything else, because in one swift motion Sam fell on his knees, freed one of his hands to put it behind her neck, and kissed her earnestly. Jessica only took a second to realize the situation before kissing him back.
"I beg you, Jess, my precious love..." he uttered against her mouth. "Delete all those thoughts from your mind, because believe me, you don't have the slightest idea what you're talking about. There's nothing, absolutely nothing, that I want more than you staying by my side forever."
They kept still, foreheads touching, Jessica looking directly at him and her eyes shedding tears.
"I tried to move on after you, I really tried," Sam spilt the truth. "There was Lori, but it was too soon; and there was Sarah, and Madison, and Amelia... God, even Ruby, which I still regret immensely. But it never worked out, for one reason or another. They were all great women in their own way, but none of them were you, Jess. Because it didn't matter how long ago it was, your memory continued to wander my heart and mind."
"Then why were you keeping me at bay, Sam? I wanted to be with you."
"Jess..." His voice was hoarse, and he noticed he was crying just like her. "You don't know yet half the things I've been through. I bear more scars than I can count, and not all of them on my body. I'm already in my thirties, living a damned life where every day I get to survive is almost a miracle; you instead are an innocent and beautiful young woman that got another chance to live her life and fulfill her dreams. I don't want to steal that away from you."
"Sam," she took his face on her hands, caressing his cheeks with her thumbs. "My life and dreams are important only because you are in them. What use would I have of this chance if I can't share it with the person I love the most?"
They kissed again, tenderly, passionately. No more words were necessary.
Sam kept crying a little longer on Jessica's lap, letting out all his bottled-up feelings, while she patted gently his head like the big puppy she knew he was. At some point she rested her head on his, when heard steps approaching from the hallway, likely Dean coming their way. The older Winchester barely peeked at the library when he saw them and decided not to interrupt their caring embrace. Getting out as cautiously silent as he could, he hoped his little brother had already made out (made up, whatever) with his babe.
*I know it was six weeks, not six days. But as I've told you, I'm rushing this.
Thanks for reading and reviewing!
