AN: I cannot thank you all enough for your reviews. They help me out so much! By the way, when I write Rosmarie, I like to imagine her resembling a young Leni Klum.


September 16, 1943

Salzburg, Austria

It had been nearly a week since the Captain appeared at Maria's work. With each passing day that he failed to show up, Maria's anxiety grew. And so, the usually extroverted Maria spent most of her days hiding in the back room. She was huddled in the corner, a wrinkled dress in her hands.

"Maria? Are you going to do anything with the dress, or…?" Maria's co-worker, Eva, approached her. She had become increasingly worried about Maria's behavior, and so had taken to doting on her like a mother hen.

"Oh! Yes, I'm just looking it over."

"You've been 'just looking it over' for the past hour. What's bothering you?" Before Maria could respond, the bell on the door rang. "I'll see to this customer, but you're greeting the next one." Eva left the room, the skirt of her handmade dress swishing around the corner. Maria took a deep breath and looked at the dress in her lap. Reluctantly, she stood and gathered her sewing kit. As she was prepping her things, Eva came rushing back into the room. Maria turned around and eyed Eva – who was now dramatically slamming and locking the door behind her – curiously.

"What are you doing?!" Eva shushed her and dragged her to the corner furthest from the door, which had been recently dubbed "Maria's corner" due to how often she moped back there. Eva grabbed her by the shoulders and held her firmly against the wall.

"Maria! You didn't tell me about him!"

"Him? I beg your pardon?"

"Captain von Trapp! He's here, and he wants you!" Eva continued her excited ranting, oblivious to the fact that all the color had drained from her friend's face. "I didn't know you knew him! How did you meet him? What's he like? Is he just as glorious and charming as people say? Would he–"

"Eva! Lower your voice! I have to explain some things to you." Maria shrugged Eva's hands off her shoulders and crossed the room to her usual spot. Eva stood against the wall across from her, assuming the role of the interrogator in this discussion. Maria gulped. "Umm… Before I was here, I was his governess. Wait, no. Not his governess! I mean, I was–"

"Maria, I get it. Continue."

"Right. As I was saying, I spent my summer with his children. They're all such lovely dears, and I miss them greatly."

"All? How many kids does he have?!"

"Umm… seven…"

Eight.

Eva's eyes widened in shock momentarily before a smirk formed on her face. "Actually, based on how attractive he is, I can understand that." Maria blushed and avoided eye contact before deciding how to proceed.

Did I tell Eva about my daughter? I can't remember!

The lies and secrets were precariously piling up in her head.

"I had to leave the family in September, though. The children went back to school and I went back to the abbey."

"Okay, but you aren't a nun and you have a child. Sooo, what happened next?"

Ah, shit.

"So, umm, basically, I left because– well the children and–"

"Yes, you did mention that his children went back to school. But I'm wondering how you ended up leaving the abbey and having a child."

"The abbey wasn't right for me, and I think everyone besides me knew that."

"Okay, and your daughter?"

"Well, umm, when I– when I left I–" A scandalized look formed on Eva's face.

"No way! Maria, you hooked up with someone?! Eager to escape the convent life, huh?"

"No! Well I didn't– he came onto me and– when we–" Eva's eyes widened even more, if that was possible.

"Wait a minute. Maria, were you raped?!"

"No!" Maria screeched, abruptly standing from the ugly wooden chair, wincing as its legs screeched against the floor. "I gave consent, but umm… it was… unconventional."

"I bet. I'm sure all sex seems unconvential to a former postulant," Eva said through a laugh.

"No, you don't understand. It was really unconventional. Umm… Like I was out of his league, if that makes any sense." Maria swallowed, slowly sitting back down. If she stood any longer, she would probably take off running. Nervously chewing on a freshly-painted fingernail, Maria watched as the gears turned in her friend's head, her hazel eyes narrowed in concentration. Eva blinked a few times before speaking.

"Wait, how many people did you know outside of the abbey? Where did you find this guy? I know you and I know that you would never come to trust anyone that quickly."

"No one. I didn't really know anyone." The room went silent. Maria bit the edge of her fingernail off, watching as it fell to the grimy floor. When she looked back up, she realized that Eva's eyes had followed the nail as well. With their eyes locked, it seemed as though something clicked in Eva's head.

"No one?" Eva whispered.

"No one."

Luckily Maria needn't continue. The look on Eva's face told her everything. Her co-worker's eyes were the size of saucers. Maria looked back to her jagged fingernail on the floor as if it would suddenly shield her from Eva's incoming onslaught of questions.

"Maria. No. Don't tell me. You fu–"

"No! It wasn't like– I mean, we didn't–" Eva shot Maria a disbelieving look, and her hands flew to her hips.

"Hold on, wasn't he with someone else? When did you even do that? More importantly, why did you do that?"

"Shh! Eva please, I need you to not tell a soul. Very few people know. It was a mistake, really. He claimed to be ending his relationship with her and everything was happening so fast. I didn't realize what I had done until after, and I feel sick about it to this very day." The girls sat in silence for a few minutes.

"And he doesn't know about Rosmarie? Have you seen him since?"

"He stopped by last week. That was the first time I'd seen him since."

"And? Does he know?"

"Umm… No." Eva gasped.

"Maria! She's just as much his child as she is yours! You have to make things right! Oh!" she exclaimed, suddenly remembering that the subject of their conversation had been waiting in the shop the entire time. "I have to tell him something. Maria, he obviously wants to see you. You have an opportunity to make things right. Or at least, start to make things right." Eva watched as a myriad of emotions broke out on Maria's face. Maria crossed her arms, her leg bouncing anxiously. She moved on to picking at her nails until Eva swatted her hand away. "Come on, I'll go with you. And may I add, he does look very dashing today!" Maria rolled her eyes as she allowed Eva to yank her up from the chair.

"Okay, okay. I'll see him, but I can't promise I'll mention Rosmarie yet." Eva shook her head disapprovingly and unlocked the door. Before she opened it, however, she turned back to Maria.

"This conversation is far from over!" Eva swung the door open to reveal the Captain casually leaning against a rack of dresses. With his legs crossed and his arms folded against his chest, Maria decided that he did look very dashing indeed. His eyes flicked to the watch on his wrist before landing back on her.

"Sorry, Captain von Trapp. She was just, um, working in the back! Here she is!" Eva tugged Maria out from behind her and shoved her forward, nearly sending her falling to the floor. The Captain watched the interaction stoically, clearly unamused. When the two made eye contact, he offered a small nod. When his gaze finally met Eva's, she took the hint. "Okay, well, I'm just going to go work in the back. Feel free to head out and talk or whatever it is you want to do." Maria's face turned bright red at her friend's implications. "It's pretty quiet, so I can manage the shop for a while. Umm, have fun!" With that, Eva spun around and took off to the back room, slamming the door behind her. Maria jumped at the slamming of the door and realized that she was, unfortunately, alone with him again. She shuffled her feet around a bit, not quite knowing how to act or what to say.

"Fräulein." She looked up at the sound of his voice.

"Captain."

"How are you doing?"

"W-What?" Maria sputtered. She hadn't expected pleasantries to be the first thing out of the man's mouth. He rolled his eyes in response.

"Fräulein, it was a simple question. I didn't mean anything else by it. However, if you want to make things more uncomfortable and complicated, we'll do it that way. Come." And with that, the Captain had already spun around and was marching out the door. Maria felt very much like a young soldier, learning how to behave under her captain's command. "We are walking to Mirabellgarten."


The nearly 15-minute walk to the gardens was dreadfully silent and painfully awkward. Both Maria and Georg avoided any interaction and eye contact with people passing by. Maria's rigid posture and the looks on both of their faces were troubled. Georg felt like with each step he took, he was closer to the gates of Hell.

Something bad is going to happen. I don't know what, but it's coming.

The out-of-sync crunching of the gravel underfoot made him feel anxious. He was always one step ahead of his companion, and whenever he looked back, she looked like she was about to run for the hills. When they finally approached the gates, he abruptly came to a stop. However, Maria had spent the entire walk in a trance, and crashed right into him.

"Oof! My apologies, Captain." Maria stepped away, fearfully looking him in the eyes.

"It's fine. Let's walk." But walking through the beautiful gardens didn't seem to help, either. Georg wanted them to chat somewhere peaceful, thinking that their surroundings could ease their nerves. However, as they walked, Maria continued to trail behind him like a lost puppy. She looked utterly ridiculous, always a few steps behind. After a short and very brisk walk, he'd had enough. He spun around, taking her in. She had her arms wrapped around her body protectively, and she looked like she was going to vomit. "Fräulein, why don't we sit? Please stop acting like I'm one step away from beating you. Come here." Maria cringed at his words. Reluctantly, she nodded and followed him, keeping her distance. He sat on one end of the bench and she on the other. Her legs bounced wildly, and the sound of gravel being kicked around was driving Georg insane. He watched as she twirled a lock of her hair around her finger. He decided that the long hair suited her better, as the breeze had a way of ruffling it to match her (usually) energetic personality perfectly.

"I'm sorry." She mumbled so quietly that he thought he was hearing things at first.

"Fräulein, that isn't going to cut it."

"Captain, this is not going to work if you don't lose the attitude."

"Me? Lose the attitude? I believe I have a right to be pissed off." He slumped against the back of the bench, folding his arms across his chest. She looked to his hand, noting the missing ring. Belatedly, she realized that she forgot to ask about his marriage last week.

"I'm sure the children have managed to move on somewhat. They have a new mother now, do they not?"

"Maria, what are you talking about? I told you I was ending my relationship with Elsa. I didn't lie to you." Georg locked eyes with Maria. She shifted in her seat uncomfortably at the disappearance of Fräulein before her name.

"Why did you– I mean why did we– why did it happen, Captain?" Maria blurted out. While she looked mortified at having to say that out loud, Georg's face remained blank.

"Why did what happen, Maria?" Her eyes narrowed.

"Captain, I think you know what I'm referring to."

"My God, you can't even say it out loud!" At Georg's shout, a pair of birds flew out of the tree behind them, perturbed by the disruption outside their quiet home.

"Well neither can you, apparently!" Maria's legs stopped bouncing. She felt her confidence soaring, only for it to be squashed by Georg's next statement.

"Okay, fine. Why did we have sex, Maria? Why did we make love? Was that your question?" Maria's hands, much like an uncomfortable child's, flew to her ears.

"Stop it! I get it!"

"I made love to you because I loved you." Maria did not miss the fact that he used loved instead of love. "And if you can't handle that confession, then this conversation is useless." Georg stood, assuming that Maria had nothing left to say.

"Loved?" Maria uttered softly. With trembling legs, she stood.

"Yes. You caused a tremendous amount of pain, not only to me, but to the children. Fortunately, since they're still young, they still love you. I might have better understood if that was the only time you ran away, but you did it twice, Maria. I still have no idea why you left the first time, either. And don't give me that bullshit about having an obligation to fulfill. I know, well, I knew you better than that." His angered speech left Maria speechless. He kicked around a few stones before turning and walking away.

"Wait!" At the sound of her voice, he stopped. He slowly turned to face her, and with a shock, Maria realized that tears had formed in his eyes. The usually uptight and emotionless Captain von Trapp was crying because of her – and she hadn't even mentioned their child yet. "I'll tell you, but I need you to sit while I say it." Wordlessly, he walked back to the bench. He wiped at his eyes before sitting down. With a deep breath, Maria realized that if she didn't speak, she could lose him forever.

"I guess I left both times because I was afraid. I like to act confident, but really, I'm a coward. I left the first time because of my feelings, which were totally inappropriate for a postulant to have." She paused to look at the Captain, noting that he was watching her intently. "Umm, anyway, I spoke with the Reverend Mother. She sent me back, telling me that I couldn't hide in the abbey. When I came back, the children told me about you and the Baroness. I was interested in a man who was betrothed to another, and it was humiliating." She snuck a glance at him, and he nodded for her to continue. "I think I left for the same reason the second time. I was afraid and confused. I did not want to be your… side piece." Georg groaned.

"Maria, I told you–"

"Captain, I know. I'll admit that it was terrible of me to run away, but I think we can both agree that what we did was wrong." Maria blushed before continuing. "I mean, it's not like I didn't enjoy it. Umm, it was an interesting experience."

"Interesting? I have never had a woman describe intercourse with me as interesting." Maria shamefully hid her face behind her hands.

"I'm sorry, I really don't know how to talk about this."

"It's alright. I do see that it wasn't the best idea, and I apologize for that. I wish you would have trusted me, though. All of this could have been avoided. Do you know how long my children have been looking for you? I cannot believe I found you in a hole-in-the-wall shop." Maria smiled at him for the first time in years.

Her smile didn't last long, however, for she remembered their daughter. She had told Eva that she couldn't promise that she was going to mention Rosmarie, but she thought back on her conversation with Heidi.

He deserves to know, and she deserves to have him in her life.

"Umm, Captain. There is something else I have to tell you." The nervous energy that had subsided came crashing back. At her nervous tone, he glanced at her worriedly.

"What's going on?"

"Umm, well. I did have… umm… an issue after the whole incident." Maria watched Georg closely. He didn't seem to have any idea where she was going with this, so she continued. "I, umm… I can't do this!" Once again, she buried her face in her hands.

"Maria, please. If it's freaking you out this much then it must be important. How bad is it?" Maria lifted her face from her hands, her skin pale and her eyes wide.

"Bad. Very bad." Georg frowned, not quite understanding.

A very bad issue after sex… Oh my God!

"Maria, was there some sort of, uh, disease or sickness?" Maria's eyes nearly bulged out of her head, catching on to what he was saying.

"No! Is that something I should be worried about now?!"

"No, no! I'm just not quite understanding what could be so bad that–" Abruptly, he stopped speaking, his face ashen.

"Captain?"

"Maria, you cannot be serious. Please tell me you're joking."

"I haven't even said anything, Captain."

"Well I'm pretty sure we're thinking of the same outcome. Maria, don't tell me that you went through with it. Please–" Maria's rage-filled eyes silenced him.

"Are you asking me if I aborted our child, Captain?! Do you even know me?!" When angry tears trickled down her cheeks, Georg had the confirmation that he needed: they had created a life that night. The thought simultaneously thrilled him and angered him. Possibly, there existed a child that was half him and half Maria. The notion of a child symbolizing their union filled him with pride and love. Thinking that he could have brought a life into this world with a woman he loved thrilled him. All of these feelings were squandered when he realized that he had lost years with his precious child. He had missed major milestones in their life. Not only was he angry with Maria, but he was angry with himself. He should have brute forced his way through the nuns' secrecy and found her years ago. He snapped out of his thoughts to find her watching him angrily.

"Do I have a son or a daughter, Maria?" he asked quietly.

"W-What?" Maria asked. They locked eyes, matching tears glistening in both. "A girl," she responded. Georg's head fell to his hands, and a sob escaped his lips. Maria, utterly ashamed of herself, resumed kicking the gravel.

"Stop! Just stop with that blasted kicking!" Georg shouted, his tear-stained face lifting to meet Maria's. She didn't think she had ever felt so disgusted and shameful.

"Captain, I'm sorry, I–"

"I'm not accepting another apology from you. I want to see her." Maria frowned.

"Captain, not like this. You cannot be serious–"

"I'm dead serious. I'm not missing another moment with my child, no matter how incompetent her mother is." Maria flew to her feet. If looks could kill, Georg would have been long since dead.

"We both messed up here."

"What?!" Georg stood, carefully stepping toward Maria. "Enlighten me, please. I would love to know how what I supposedly did was worse than you hiding my child from me for six years!" Georg's shouting attracted attention from a nearby elderly couple. The couple glanced at Maria and Georg before quickly walking away, whispering the entire time. Once the couple was out of earshot, Georg stepped a bit closer, shoving an accusatory finger in Maria's sunken face. "Do not bother with another shitty apology. I have nothing to say to you. I'm only maintaining this relationship for the sake of my daughter. Does she even know I exist?"

"Yes, of course she does!"

"Great. So if she knows I exist, why didn't I know that she exists?" Georg didn't bother waiting for an answer. Instead, he took off in the direction of Maria's work.

"Captain, what–" When he turned around to face her, he was the Captain von Trapp who had found her in the ballroom.

"We are heading back to the shop. I have an idea of when her school day ends, so we will wait until then. I am coming with you." He ended the conversation, turning around and continuing toward the shop. Maria, resuming the role of the lost puppy, trailed behind him all the way back to work.


Eva greeted them when they arrived, but the smile on her face instantly disappeared when she took in the looks on their faces. Their eyes were bloodshot and Georg looked vaguely sick.

"We'll only be here for a moment, Eva. I'm just going to call home and tell Heidi that I'm picking up Rosmarie today." Maria spoke. Georg softened at his daughter's name. Rosmarie. Eva's eyes widened, and she looked from Maria to Georg. "Eva, he knows."

"He is right here and is incredibly angry that everyone knew about his child before he did!" Both Maria and Eva jumped at his shouting.

"Umm, I'm just going to call her now." Maria took off to the back room, leaving Eva alone with Georg.

"How long have you known?" Georg sneered.

"I've known about Rosmarie for a while, but I only learned of your – erm – involvement today." Georg offered no response. The two stood in silence, waiting for Maria. While Eva considered herself to be Maria's friend, her heart ached for the man standing in front of her. What Maria had done was beyond wrong, and she could only assume from his reddened eyes, cold demeanor, and set jaw that Georg was absolutely livid– as he should be.


After a tense and silent car ride, Georg and Maria arrived at Rosmarie's school. Outside the building, they hung back, watching the line of small children trickle out of the building. The quiet chatter of children greeting their parents reminded Georg of how involved he was with his children before Agathe died. An odd sort of sadness settled deep within him thinking about how all of, well, most of his children were old enough to get to and from school without him. He glanced to his right, silently watching as his children's former governess' hair blew about softly in the autumn breeze. He briefly wondered what theirdaughter looked like. Thinking about it absolutely terrified him – he was becoming a father all over again. What Georg was totally unprepared for, however, was the tiny body that catapulted itself at Maria. In an unexpected flurry of curly hair and skinny limbs, the girl threw herself at her mother's abdomen, drawing an "Oof!" from her mother. He watched in awe from a few feet away, deciding that the girl looked vaguely familiar. Maria knelt to her level, and with the lovingly effortless care of a mother, she gently tucked her daughter's hair behind her ears, unknowingly giving Georg a better look at his daughter.

He took in her features, instantly noticing that it looked like the girl had stolen her mother's entire face. The gentle slope and pointy tip of her nose were all her mother's. The sun caught her face, introducing him to the smattering of freckles on her cheeks, and oh God, those eyes. He had only seen such blue eyes in one other child: Liesl. He soon found himself entranced by caramel curls and eyes as clear and blue as the Mediterranean. He watched as Maria whispered something in their little girl's ear. The girl, his daughter, slowly turned to face him. When his eyes locked with his daughter's for the first time, he instantly fell in love. The familiar rush of warmth and happiness spread throughout his body like a drug, repressing all memories and thoughts of his earlier interactions with Maria. Upon looking at her head-on, he instantly knew where he recognized her from – she was the girl he had seen shopping last week. She curiously cocked her head to the side, her narrowed eyes a perfect copy of his own. If he thought he was going to have a heart attack just by looking at her, then the tiny sound of her melodic voice would absolutely be the death of him.

"Captain von Trapp!" she exclaimed. She giggled and clapped her dainty hands together, proud of herself for remembering. Maria looked at her curiously.

"Darling, how do you know who this is?" Rosmarie looked from Georg to her mother, smiling.

"Gotte told me who he was after she saw him staring at me!" Georg awkwardly coughed and Maria's wide eyes were instantly on him.

"Captain? What is she talking about?" Georg tugged on his ear, uncomfortable under the scrutiny of both Maria and his cheeky daughter.

"Erm, I saw her last week. I thought she looked familiar, so I must've been staring. Now I realize she looked familiar because she looks just like you. I apologize." Rosmarie shook her head and smiled.

"It's okay! Gotte told me how very brave and wise you are!" Georg laughed nervously while Maria continued to glare at him. He swallowed, knowing he'd be lectured later.

How on Earth did Maria assume the dominant role in this relationship so quickly?!

His daughter approached him slowly, a frown now gracing her face. "You don't look so brave right now. I have someone that can help!" Before he could say anything, Rosmarie had already tossed her book bag in the dirt, eliciting an exasperated "Rosie!" from her mother. She unzipped her bag with an energy reminiscent of Gretl's whenever she ate too much sugar. He watched as she rifled through a pile of miscellaneous school materials. Finally, with a small "Ah ha!" she dragged a sagging stuffed bear out from the depths of the bag. While the bear was missing fur in some places, its glassy eyes looked quite new. She thrust the bear toward him, his head flopping slightly over at the force of it. Georg's eyes flickered from the bear to his daughter, who had the most beautiful smile on her face. His heart melted, and he knew that his little girl could have offered him a ticking bomb and he would have accepted it. With slightly trembling hands, he took the bear and held it tight against him. He knelt to his daughter's level much like Maria had moments before.

"Thank you, I'm sure this will help." He glanced at Maria over his daughter's head, disappointed to see that she was avoiding looking at him. Her arms were folded protectively across her chest, and her eyes were glued to the back of their daughter's head. "And what is your name?" he asked.

"Rosmarie Rainer." The addition of Maria's last name and not "von Trapp" hurt, but that would change soon. Hopefully. "How do you know Mother?" Georg froze. He looked up to Maria for help, only to see the same protective and slightly perturbed look on her face.

"Darling, Captain von Trapp is a good friend of mine. He wanted to come meet you today. Isn't that kind of him?" Georg noticed how she stumbled over the words "good friend." They certainly were not friends, and he had no intention of changing that any time soon. A friend would not do to Georg what Maria did to him. Rosmarie nodded at her mother's response. Her eyes roamed over Georg's face as if memorizing his features. Seconds later, she yawned and rubbed at her eyes. "Alright, why don't we head home, Rosie?"

"Is Captain von Trapp coming with us?" Maria and Georg stood, eyeing each other over Rosmarie's head.

"Not today, darling," Maria responded. Rosmarie sadly retrieved the bear from Georg's grasp.

"May I offer you both a ride home?" he asked, knowing that Maria really had no other choice. Knowing Maria, he assumed she most likely walked or took the bus to work. She nodded, and the trio headed back to the car. Every so often, he would look over his shoulder at Maria and Rosmarie.

My daughter. My beautiful little girl.

While he was beyond furious with Maria, he couldn't help the masculine pride he felt when he thought of her carrying and birthing his child. She had sacrificed her body to grow and birth his baby. He didn't truly think she would ever terminate a pregnancy, but some selfish part of him told him that she could have terminated this one and chose not to. She nursed and cared for his baby girl. He only wished he had been there for all of it.


Dropping Maria and their daughter off had been uneventful, save for the awkward conversation at the front doorstep.

"Captain, I know you're very angry with me and I know that what I did was so wrong." Maria eyed him carefully before continuing. "I want her to be in your life, and you in hers. I'm thinking of gradually increasing your presence around her before telling her that you're her father. I hope we can manage to get along for the sake of Rosmarie." Georg nodded. "I hope you haven't been ogling any other small children lately. Please don't do it again with Rosmarie. Much like Brigitta, she notices everything." While he was very unhappy about the co-parenting situation he was to be entering, he knew he had very little say in the matter… for now…

Georg pulled into the driveway, immediately releasing all of the anger that his beautiful daughter had repressed. He slammed his fists into the steering wheel, causing his car to honk numerous times.

"Fuck!" he shouted, wincing as his fists collided with the wheel once again. His fists were shortly followed by his head, causing a long drawn out honk. He lifted his head from the wheel, his vision blurred and his eyes sore from crying. Through his spotty vision, he could barely discern a figure in the distance.

"Father?" he heard a muffled call from one of his daughters. He sat up, only to instantly slump back against the leather seat. He had a hard time remembering the last time he felt so utterly broken and numb. His vision was cloudy at best. His head was pounding, and the incessant tinnitus was making everything worse. The last time he remembered feeling even remotely similar to this was the day Agathe died. He jumped at his daughter's fist knocking against the window. He slowly turned his head, making out more than one figure eyeing him worriedly.

Am I hallucinating, or are most of my kids watching me break down like this right now?

He could barely make out the faint outline of Louisa's blonde hair, Brigitta's new reading glasses, and the glint of a tear trickling down Gretl's face. He slowly and almost drunkenly waved his daughters away from the car and slowly opened the door. As he opened the door and unbuckled his seatbelt, however, he did the most embarrassing thing he could ever manage to do in front of children: he fell. He tumbled right out of the car, his near-lifeless and exhausted body crumpling to the ground in a heap. The last voice he heard before his vision went black was Marta's screaming for Frau Schmidt.


Hours later he awoke, only to find seven wide pairs of eyes glued to him. He quickly glanced at the clock beside him, noting that he had slept through dinner and that the younger children at least needed to be in bed within an hour.

"I'm alright, I'm alright," he managed to choke out. He had thought that talking would make them feel better. Instead, it managed to have the opposite effect. His younger daughters howled and the boys grimaced, backing away from their father like he was the plague. Liesl, ever the mature and responsible one, bravely stepped forward, placing her hand atop his arm.

"Father, you don't sound alright. You tumbled right out of the car! Do you remember?" Liesl's miniscule act of bravery inspired the rest of his daughters – who had also witnessed the rest of his pride fall down the drain – to start speaking up.

"Father, it was really scary! You're never clumsy like that!" Marta added.

"I've been crying about it all afternoon, Father. I thought you were dying!" Gretl, always one for dramatics, practically shouted before bursting into tears.

"Why were you gone for so long, Father? Normally you're home from school before us!" Brigitta questioned. Shit. The reason he knew when Rosmarie got out of school was because his younger children got out shortly after.

The children must have been worried sick when I, their usually prompt father, was nowhere to be found.

"Father," Liesl cautiously began. "You weren't drinking again, were you?" The rest of the children ceased their worried chatter and immediately trained their eyes back on their father. Only Liesl could vividly remember when he had fallen asleep drunk out of his mind in his study after Agathe died. She had discovered him there many nights, his face pressed against his desk and surrounded by empty bottles. Apparently, he had taken too long to answer, because Gretl started crying again and Liesl looked outraged.

"No, no! I was not out drinking. I have not done that in a very long time, nor do I plan on doing so again."

"So then what were you doing?" Brigitta asked. Unfortunately, Georg had not planned on being questioned by his children about the shitty day he had. As such, he didn't have a believable lie formulated. If it had been just Marta and Gretl, he could've managed. However, all seven of his children were watching his every move and dissecting every word he said. He had to choose his next words very carefully.

"I stumbled upon someone – er – something, I didn't want to see again." Horrible choice, Georg. He watched as his children processed his words differently. Marta and Gretl remained visibly confused. Brigitta looked like she was mentally piecing together a very challenging puzzle. Louisa was staring blankly at the wall above him, and he recognized it as the same action she did when she was thinking through a particularly difficult arithmetic problem. The boys stood further away, looking confusedly between the floor and each other. Liesl's eyes, however, remained locked with his the entire time. In that moment, he knew that she knew. A simple question formed in her eyes: Fräulein Maria?

"Baroness Schraeder, Father?" Brigitta asked. None of the children attempted to hide their disdain for the woman their father nearly married.

"No, not Baroness Schraeder. Now, I do think that's enough questioning tonight, hmm? I've had a very long and terrible day, and you all need to head to bed soon. I promise I'll be here and doing okay when you wake up tomorrow morning." The children took turns kissing their father's forehead before slowly turning and heading for the door. However, they had barely reached the doorway when Liesl spoke up.

"It was Fräulein Maria, wasn't it, Father?" At the mere mention of the revered Fräulein Maria, all of the children spun around, gigantic smiles growing on their faces. Gretl, having completely forgotten that she thought her father was dying a few hours prior, excitedly launched herself on the bed. Georg let out a strangled cry as his daughter landed right on his tired legs. The children began rapid-fire asking questions.

"How was she?"

"What does she look like?"

"Where did you find her? We've been looking everywhere!"

"Is she a nun now, Father?"

"Is she still wearing that ugly dress?"

"Alright, settle down, children." Georg spoke louder and more stern than he expected to, and instantly the children drew back. Gretl hopped off the bed and backed away. At his children's fearful reaction, he recoiled, hating the sight of them afraid of him.

"No! It's okay, I'm sorry. Come back." He patted the end of the bed, watching as Gretl slowly jumped back up. The children drew closer, unspoken sentiments about their dear former governess dying on their tongues. "Yes. I saw Fräulein Maria today. However, I will notbe telling you where I found her. She does not need you rascals bothering her at work."

"Work, Father? She left the abbey?" Brigitta asked the question that everyone was dying to know the answer to.

"Yes, she did."

"I knew it. We all did," Brigitta responded, her siblings nodding in agreement. "Why did you have such an adverse reaction to seeing her?" Once again, the children pleadingly looked at their father. Georg knew that they would never sleep if he didn't answer.

"Uh, I guess we managed to have a good fight or two. You know how we were around each other."

"Father, you never passed out after you fought. She always won and you seemed fine afterwards."

"This fight was different, Brigitta."

"What does she look like, Father? Is her hair very long and pretty? She always told me that when she was my age, she had a hard time braiding her long hair without her mother's help!" Gretl interrupted. Brigitta, Louisa, and Liesl looked scornfully at Gretl, obviously wanting answers to more important questions.

"Her hair is very long now, Gretl."

"What made you so angry, Father?" This time, Louisa asked the question. His most reserved daughter was asking about his encounter with a governess that she desperately wanted to hate, and it got to him. He fumbled in his reply.

"We argued about some-something, that's all.

"Who did you argue over, Father?" Louisa teased.

"No, I said something, not someone," Georg replied. But it was all for naught, as a wide-eyed Marta gasped and asked:

"Does Fräulein Maria have a boyfriend?!" Gretl's hands flew to her mouth, a gasp threatening to escape.

"Why would Father care if Fräulein Maria has a boyfriend, Marta?" Kurt asked from the corner of the room. Next to him, Friedrich rolled his eyes. Gretl clambered over her father's blanket-covered legs, turning to face her brother.

"Because Father likes Fräulein Maria!" she exclaimed.

"No, Father does not like Fräulein Maria," Georg said with such confidence that the older girls shared a worried glance.

"But–"

"No 'buts,' Brigitta. It's time for bed." At that, the children asked even more questions:

"Did she ask about us?"

"Did you tell her that I won the school spelling bee?"

"Does she know how well I'm doing at university?"

"Did you tell her that I finally lost all my baby teeth?"

"Does she know that Baroness Schraeder left?"

Georg felt like he was drowning. His children continued shouting, their questions like knives piercing his skin. Each question about Maria brought back painful memories from earlier. He fought the urge to punch the bed beneath him in rage, knowing that it would no doubt terrify the children.

"If I agree to answer a few more questions, will you go to bed without arguing?" he asked. The children nodded, allowing him to continue. "Okay, we'll start with Gretl and work our way up to Liesl. Gretl?" The older children sighed, assuming that Gretl's question would be the most useless. However, Gretl's question spurred a chain reaction of questions and answers that the children would attempt to solve like riddles.

"Does Fräulein Maria actually have a boyfriend, Father?"

"No, not that I know of. Marta?"

Six more questions, Georg. You can do this.

"Who did you argue about?"

"A friend. Brigitta?"

Too close for comfort. Only five more.

"Why did you argue about this 'friend,' Father?"

"Because Fräulein Maria has been spending a lot of time with this friend behind my back. They're very close, and it's somewhat awkward now. Kurt?"

Calm down. Calm down. Calm down. Four more.

"Have we met this friend?"

"No, but you might soon. Louisa?"

Deep breaths. Three more.

"How long have you known this friend?"

"Not nearly as long as I wish I did."

"That wasn't even an answer. That was just cryptic, Father," Louisa deadpanned.

Oh God. She's bucking the trend. Get back on track!

"It's the only answer I'm willing to give for now. Friedrich?"

Two more two more two more two more two–

"Why are you acting so secretive about this 'friend?' Can't you just tell us their name or at least a few things about them?" The rest of the children murmured in agreement.

"Her name is Rose. Liesl?"

A half truth. Last. Question.

But Liesl had watched the hurt build in her father's eyes after each question. The information she and her siblings had was vague, but they would do their best to investigate. So, Liesl smiled and shook her head.

"It's alright, Father. I don't think we have any more questions." And with that, Liesl ushered her stunned and confused siblings out of the room, gently shutting her father's door behind her.

Georg was left alone in a hurt and angered stupor. In the darkness of his bedroom, he imagined that he was not asked seven questions, but eight. An eighth question, asked by the miraculous being he met earlier that day. He imagined her climbing onto his bed, much like Gretl had done just moments before. Her hallucinated form calmed him. However, when she opened her mouth to ask her question, he felt the familiar tingle of oncoming angry tears.

"If you love me so much, why can't I be with you, Father? Bring me home to my family, Papa!"

"Papa" had not been used in the von Trapp household in a very long time. Years ago, Gretl had been the last to utter the nickname he no longer felt deserving of. The vision of his youngest crying out to him filled him with sorrow and grief. He mourned the years he had already lost with Rosmarie. He vowed to dig deep and find a way to at least be cordial with Maria for the sake of their daughter.

Thinking of Maria no longer brought him joy and laughter, but rather hatred and distrust. The woman he once loved had not only ripped his heart out, but stabbed it viciously until it no longer bled. Lying on his side under the covers, Georg fell asleep. Soon, he began to dream. His mind filled with various gruesome scenarios involving Maria that could have pained him less. She drained the lake behind his house that he so loved. She destroyed the hedges and set his horses free. She smashed each and every one of his precious medals.

But the final vision disturbed him the most. He watched as she set fire to his beautiful villa, destroying it and all of the memories it held. Her eyes lit up with glee, and the vibrant flames danced in her crystal blue irises. Still, he had felt no real sense of loss. But, the smoke parted, and the cherubic form of his daughter walked through. She floated up from the dust and ashes, her curls billowing in the smoky air. The fire continued to rage behind her, encircling her like the rising of a phoenix. Within her hands she held a burnt book. She took slow yet purposeful strides toward him, her bare feet slapping against the charred concrete. Finally, she stood just a few feet away. She thumbed open the book and carefully flipped through the pages. After she reached the page she was searching for, she held the nearly-ruined book out to him. When he took the book, she faded away until she was but a pile of ash, joining the rest of the destruction surrounding her. As the fire died down and the ash was swept away by the wind, he finally looked down at the book in his hands. It was a poem, and it was one he knew very well. He lovingly thumbed the title before reading.

Quiet friend who has come so far,

feel how your breathing makes more space around you.

Let this darkness be a bell tower

and you the bell. As you ring,

what batters you becomes your strength.

Move back and forth into the change.

What is it like, such intensity of pain?

If the drink is bitter, turn yourself to wine.

In this uncontainable night,

be the mystery at the crossroads of your senses,

the meaning discovered there.

And if the world has ceased to hear you,

say to the silent earth: I flow.

To the rushing water, speak: I am.


AN: The above poem is Let This Darkness Be a Bell Tower by Rainer Maria Rilke. Not only is it one of my favorites, but based on how I interpret it, I think it fits pretty well. I see it as finding the positive in your darkest moments, and that sometimes that positive is yourself and your ability to approach a seemingly impossible challenge as a positive or a gift. I think I found a beautiful and interesting way to incorporate this into the story, and I loved the concept of his daughter passing this message onto him. I see it as her telling him that she's the bell tower in the darkness he's surrounded by. While Georg's situation is truly awful and heartbreaking, he has gained a loved one. Through this time of weakness, despair, and unexpected change, his love and newfound family will guide him through.

I think this is my longest chapter yet, and I changed the title about 20 times before I finally settled on this one. This chapter was an absolute beast to write, and it actually took a lot out of me. It might be a little while before I return with another chapter, but I'll definitely be back.

As of my final time editing this before publishing it, I have managed to find myself sick. So it will be a little while before I come back. Hopefully not too long, though. Please forgive any spelling and grammatical errors. I have read this chapter over and over, and I usually go back through my work and edit it after publishing. Thanks!