Shikamaru had never been a difficult child. He did as he was told and kept out of trouble. Sure he did the bare minimum in school, spending most of his education sleeping, ditching class and watching clouds, but despite Yoshino pestering and protesting, the Nara head never felt the need to confront his son on the issue. He was a smart boy, shikaku didn't need the test scores to prove that. He would let his son grow up and mature at his own pace. They were no longer in a time of war and could finally let children be children. The younger Nara wouldn't be emotionally hardened and stripped of his innocents like he was.
He would be the first to admit his wife was the more active parent. Unfortunately, being the clan head and jonin commander came at the cost of a few missed birthday's and being absent at family occasions. Still, he tried to be available in between duties to train and play the occasional game of shogi with his son. If shikamaru sought him out he tried his best to be available. The boy seemed to understand and never complained about his absence. He really was a good boy. When it came to matters of the mind shikaku was in his element, but with matters of the heart… well let's just say Yoshino called him emotionally constipated for a reason, but for what he lacked in that department she made up for in spades. Really the woman was terrifyingly passionate and determined but he wouldn't have her any other way. Like most teenagers Shikamaru was more distant as he got older, Yoshino complained about it a lot but shikaku didn't want to press the subject. He trusted his son would approach them if needed and felt that if Shikamaru had to pull away to find his own place in the world he would give him his space.
'Even if he wanted to he couldn't exactly relate or advice his son about this tender stage of growing up. Shikaku never experienced it himself, as soon as he was rushed out of the Academy he was an adult drafted into war. He did however step in after the loss of Asuma. While the Nara was not the best at exploring his own emotions, he had experienced the loss of those close to him enough to understand his son needed to let himself face his pain and grief, as well as let go of his misplaced guilt. Loss is a traumatic yet inevitable milestone of shinobi life that every ninja must face and overcome. The underage smoking that followed was not an ideal way of coping, but he couldn't really judge the boy to harshly considering he himself drank more then he would like to admit at times to deal with his own trauma when it raised its ugly head.
Shikamaru seemed to focus and come into his own, impressing the higher ups to the point of being promoted to jonin at just 16! Shikaku had never been prouder of his boy, even if said boy seemed to think the whole thing was far too troublesome and would much prefer to keep his previous rank.
These days his son wasn't home often but that was to be expected with the amount of missions the usually lazy Nara was taking on. It made sense he supposed. As the son of the jonin commander people would be paying close attention to the teen, questioning the judgment of promoting one so young and looking for ways to discredit him. One of the best ways to silence those naysayers would be to build a reputation that should speak for itself. He trusted his son not to burn himself out but was considering suggesting some lower ranked mission soon, if he didn't a good habit to be taking so much on so quickly, the boy needed to learn balance.
All in all, the older Nara thought while he wouldn't be winning any parent of the year awards, he didn't do too badly in raising his son, and liked to think he and Shikamaru had a decent relationship.
That was until recently.
When his whole world turned to shit.
For the first time in his life Shikaku was at a loss as to how to talk to his son. There was a heavy silence that hung around the pair. Tension so thick you could cut it with a kunai. His choice of words made him wince internally. The dark circles under his sons eyes and the slight tremble of the cigarette in his hand told him that his son also felt this situation was just as fucked.
"Feel like a game of shogi?" Shikaku tried to sound nonchalant. Maybe some sense of normality would help them act like this was a normal situation to be in. Fuck he could do with a bottle of saki.
"What, you seriously brought a shogi board on a mission?" His son asked him incredulously, trying to mask his own discomfort it seemed.
Shikaku felt like a bit of a basterd. using this mask of normalcy to make his son think there was a chance shikaku would drop the subject, never to bring it up again. He was pretty sure that his son wasn't so naive, but would bet his life on the fact that Shikamaru was praying for that outcome.
"We both know we don't need a bored to play at this point, but yeah I did bring one. on a long mission shogi can be a fun pastime"
"That was a bit of a lie. He wouldn't bring anything that could potentially distract him or more likely his team mates normally. He brought the bored purely on a whim because he was on a mission with his son, and oh how he was glad of it now.
"The facade of ignorance didn't last long.
"The silence was far too loud as they started there game. He had to play this carefully, his son seemed to be playing defensively today.
Shikaku manoeuvred to Subtly approach the boys defensive position.
" we need to talk about it."
"I'm fine" Both his sons words and moves where guarded.
"No you're not." Shikaku carefully pushed searching for an opening.
"I won't let it effect my responsibilities. So there is nothing to be concerned about."
The younger Nara promptly blocked Shikaku's advance, he would have to change his approach. Shikaku huffed in frustration.
"It's not your work performance I'm worried about." Shikaku gently corrected as he straightened up and made his next move.
"Switching to a more aggressive play Shikamaru went on the attack. " Then why do you care?" The question was painfully blunt as he laid down his rook with slightly more force then needed.
" Because it's my job to care." His bishop slammed down as he clenched his jaw, trying to swallow down the anger and hurt at the shear fact his son would ask such a question. Pushing his emotions away he focused on trying to gain an opening.
" As long as I complete my assignments to a high Standard the jonin commander needn't worry about my personal life." his son retorted coldly.
"I'm not talking about my job as the jonin commander! I'm talking about my job as your father Shikamaru!" He could feel his calm impassive mask crumble slightly at the fact that he had to clarify something that should be so fucking obvious!
" You never cared before." It wasn't phrased as a question, or even an accusation. His eyes where fixed down on his Silver general, which was a good thing, since Shikaku recoiled like he'd just been stabbed in the gut. In truth it would of been preferable and less painful.
It was hard to keep his focus on the board, not that there was much point anyway. It was looking like neither of them could hope to best the other. Forcing his face into composure he ended the game.
"Looks like where at an impasse."
So it seems." Shikamaru confirmed stubbing out his neglected cigarette.
"The bitter irony of it all wasn't lost on Shikaku.
Fuck, he needed a drink.
