Chapter I: IMPULSE
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Parts of me were scattered all across Twilight Town. My head here, in a lonely, dark tunnel, shrouded by graffitied walls with chipped paint and a lingering, musky scent; my eyes far removed from the scene, in some far corner of town sitting on the clock tower to oversee a sunset I'd seen a thousand times before; and my spirit laid bare against the metal train tracks in Sunset Terrace, chained down to the ground to be run over and crushed again and again. I'd picked myself apart effortlessly once before, but piecing myself back together again was an ordeal that I had not intended that needed a lot more effort than I was willing to invest in myself.
Crouched down next to a drainpipe in the south of the town, I held my head in between my legs whilst the rain pitter-pattered next to the tunnel. A light breeze shifted droplets onto me and a little bit splattered on my face. It was a nice feeling, though. And the smell wasn't too bad. Not too acidic. But when the rain picked up, turned into a shower, and slammed down onto the tarmac next to me with a wild ferocity, I started to get annoyed at the weather. I hadn't brought an umbrella and I was stuck in a tiny underpass overwhelmed by all of the stimuli my head reacted to—every little thing activated my head in some way, like I couldn't not react. I couldn't stop. And so I tried to bury my head in my legs once more, but a stranger zoomed into the tunnel from the heavy downpour and sat right next to me.
I looked blankly at the young woman. She had a long black fringe that covered half of her face, though here it was drenched; she grabbed hold of it and squeezed the water out like a sponge, then pulled out a small towel from her to pat herself dry. Cautious of her intentions, I scooted away from her to the other end of the tunnel, which she didn't immediately react to. I sighed and brought my head in between my legs once more, trying to block out all of the ambience, the sounds, the stimuli, but this time, I heard a soft voice reach out to me amongst the loud pattering of the rain and passing overhead vehicles.
'Um, are you Vanitas?'
I didn't turn immediately to my name. Instead, I fixed my gaze on the fractured tiles beneath me where my eyes ran down the crevices in the stone, zooming in and slithering down it as to avoid her question.
'Um, hi, I'm not sure if you heard me just now.' Footsteps approached me, splashing the puddles of rain ever so slightly, despite her slow, gentle steps that I could hear. She tapped my legs with her umbrella. I felt her kneel down to get down to my level. 'Is your name Vanitas?'
I crank my neck right to face her. 'Who are you?'
Instead of a disgusted face that contorted whenever I showed hesitation or malice, she quietly apologised, recomposed her appearance in front of me, and took a step back from me. 'I'm someone who was told to look for you. I was told I'd find you somewhere around here, probably hiding in the tunnel under the cars by yourself.'
Her words felt like they served only confusion to my freezing head. 'That's not what . . . I meant: who are you? How do you know me?' Uneasy, I shifted even farther away from her, even if it meant coming in contact with the torrential rain outside.
'I—' she began, reaching her hand out to me from afar, but she pulled back and closed her lips. 'I can't say right now. I promised not to say. But I'm a friend of one of your friends.'
'I don't have friends,' I said nonchalantly, shaking my head to air-dry in the cold. She muttered something too quiet for me to hear, so I asked, 'What did you say?'
She snapped her head to me and quickly said, 'Nothing,' but curiosity got the better of me and I scooted closer to her. It had been a while since I made that decision myself; strange shivers crawled all over my skin, underneath my thin, wet clothes, and chilled me to the bone. I shook it away in an instant.
'Why did you try and find me?'
'Someone I used to know made a promise with me, kinda like a bond. Part of that bond was to help you out,' the woman explained, handing me a towel to pat my face dry.
I took her offered towel and patted my hair dry. 'Promise this, promise that. You're not good at explaining,' I replied, tousling my hair in frustration. 'Good at looking suspicious, though.'
She gave a lighthearted chuckle, ending it off with a subdued sigh muffled by the rain that echoed in the tunnel. 'I get that a lot. I'm not very good at talking.'
'At least we're similar in that regard.'
'I've been told,' she started, moving her hair behind her ear. 'Say, Vanitas?'
'Hm?'
'What were you doing here?'
'I could say the same thing, you know.'
'Difference being that you won't get an answer.'
'Brave of you to think I'd give you one,' I countered. In my head, I backed off a bit and retreated back into a darker corner of my mind; mind games weren't for me. 'But I'll enlighten you. I'm here because I love the rain.'
Looking at her, she had her brows raised in suspicion. 'Really? Not for anything else?'
'No.' She wouldn't pry that easily and I wouldn't be so naive to tell.
'Hm, I see. You're not here to cry, or to mourn, or to grieve, or feel sad in general?'
'What's up with you being so specific?' I asked, slightly creeped out by her accurate probing.
'What's up with you not answering?'
I stood up and leant against the wall opposite her. Fiddling with my nails, I said, 'I don't know you. You're a stranger. I'm not just going to, you know, tell you everything.'
'Then I'll just have to get to know your side a bit better then,' she quietly said under her breath, but loud enough that I caught it.
My face creased into intimidation and I glared at her. 'What's your name?'
She brought her hand out for a handshake, closed her eyes for a moment, and gave me one of the most innocent and calm smiles I'd ever seen in my life. 'My name is Xion. It's nice to meet you, Vanitas.'
I accepted her handshake. 'You might come to regret saying that.'
Once she stood up, she opened the umbrella and asked me to walk with her to Central Station up Market Street Way. Shielded from the pouring rain, I obliged and stuck close to her, eventually offering to hold the umbrella myself. It had been a long time since I had done anything remotely considerate for anyone else. Spent too long skulking in the corner of my mind, waiting for the nights to come and the days to end; I felt less restless inside my own head.
It had been a long while since I had come up this way. Since I was close to the station at all. The hilly street was lit up by streetlights on either side and the subtle illumination of lights underground that flashed softly, lighting the way in a warm glow, painting a picture in front of me that I had forgotten about. The pitter-patter of the rain on the umbrella above me felt relaxing; I felt my body less tense, less locked up.
When we reached the top, we had been silent for a while. Looking far out to the horizon, what was renowned for picturesque views and a sunset that belonged on postcards and wallpapers did not exist, and instead we looked out to a treacherous ocean, battering waves against the beaches, and another unappealing storm. The winds suddenly picked up and inverted the umbrella, causing us to get soaking wet once again—this time together. We quickly dashed into the station and brushed it all off.
'Today's not been great,' she said, putting the umbrella back in her bag.
'Something else we can agree on.'
'You're much more agreeable than I originally thought you would be,' she admitted to me as she rummaged around her bag for something, then plucked out a ticket.
'I don't . . . I'm not usually in a good mood.'
She laughed. 'It's good that I'm cherishing this as we speak, then. Say, Vanitas?'
'Hm?' I switched my gaze from the floor to her face, frozen in place for a split-second from that smile of hers like before. I coughed to regain my composure. 'What is it?'
'You're just going to go back to that tunnel, aren't you?'
I placed my hands into my pockets, giving her the answer she wanted.
'Aren't you?'
I rustled my hair and sighed once more. 'What now?'
'How about you come over mine for some tea?' she suggested, confusing me even more than she already had done.
I stared blankly at her, my head deep in thought from this strange offering from someone I had known for less than half an hour. What was she playing at? Sounded like another mind game. Where did she live? I had to be on my guard, like always—perhaps even more so now. The spontaneity played with me like I was a toy; walking straight into a stranger's den set off all kinds of alarms in my head, and I wasn't ready.
'I can cook really well,' she pressed, closing the distance between us.
I couldn't. She looked too excited for her own good. Jittery palms, pacing back and forth, she had the impatience of a child and yet I did not have the heart at all to say no. I had already come this far.
'All right. Just for the afternoon,' I said, giving in.
After buying my ticket and getting on the platform with her, I questioned this decision. Criticised myself. This was too spontaneous. And when I looked at her as we sat opposite each other, with a table separating us as we watched time pass by in our own ways, she had that same sickly smile plastered on her face, though more subdued this time. Maybe I thought that if I followed her, I'd get to see it more at the expense of my own smiles. Maybe we'd see eye-to-eye on things. Maybe, just maybe, I'd be able to feel more than bitterness for the first time in weeks.
Author's Note: Hope you enjoyed the first chapter! For people who are interested in this story and want to contribute in any way, I'm trying to think of street names appropriate for Twilight Town to better flesh out the area and enlarge it so more can happen than just the areas we know and love already. So if you have any suggestions, either put it in a comment/review or send me a message about it. Thanks for readin!
