Warning: if this wasn't mature before, it's mature now. Please be advised.

A few hours later, Harry still wasn't quite sure what to make of everything going on. Not just isolating the events of today - for those were tiringly common now - but all the things that happened to lead up to this point. It seemed that no one was happy anymore. Maybe he was just projecting his own sorrow onto everyone around him, he didn't quite know. Now at the foot of his bed, he was glad that Katie had decided to help clean up dinner so he could go to bed in peace. Harry knew it wasn't good to feel that way about your significant other, but ultimately didn't give a shit. Ever since he and Katie got together Harry learned what true annoyance was.

She'd developed a new music taste that she called "experimental", a term Harry was quick to retort that it was just mental. Katie had become engulfed in a muggle music genre called Arabian Nightcore, which contained "music" that made Harry long for when he was at Hogwarts derooting mandrakes. At least then he was allowed to wear earmuffs. Harry sighed as he eased into bed, hoping that tomorrow would contain a ray of hope in his otherwise gloomy life…

"...Are you still awake?" A shrill, disjointed voice called out.

Harry opened his eyes with a twinge of annoyance, he knew that shrill voice to be Katie, waking him for no good reason.

"Oh good, you're still up, we can talk then." Katie stated.

A twinge of rage bubbled in Harry, "Can't it wait?"

"No, not this time. Just turn and face me…"

Harry obeyed, but only because he wanted to shout at her just how much he hated her at this moment. However, upon turning, Harry saw Katie was flaunting deeply romantic lingerie through his blurred vision. Harry hurriedly reached on the nightstand for his glasses, and Katie's beautiful curves came into focus. They wordlessly locked in embrace, and all of Katie's negative attributes melted away before Harry's eyes. They started to get deeply passionate, and the rest of the world simply melted away.

"Put your Basilisk in my Chamber of Secrets…" Katie moaned sensually.

Harry didn't even think for a moment how stupid that sentence was, he was overcome by a primal urge that flushed out all rationality. How could I have been so mad at her? But the moment was abruptly broken by a loud creak at the door. Harry and Katie both turned to see Ron, standing in the doorway. Even stranger, he was wearing only his underwear, which harbored a clear outline of a very large package.

"Hey, uh… it's bloody cold out in my room, I uh… erm- was wondering if I could maybe join you guys..?"

His request left Harry quite flummoxed, Ron was a married man, and Harry and Katie were in a relationship of their own. But by the sound of his sheepish yet flirtatious tone, it sounded like he wanted to have a threesome. But before Harry could say anything in response, Katie sat up and gave a wry smile, wavering her finger toward herself. Ron obeyed, closing the door behind him, and crawling into the already crowded bed. Harry now had a swell of emotion he never felt, and had no idea if it was good or bad. The next few moments were a tangle of bedsheets and skin, one that Harry had no choice but to just dive head first into.

Katie was slobbering on Ron's cock while Harry watched. When she finished, she leaned into Harry with a sly smile. Harry mirrored this, now feeling overcome with a passion he never had before. He and Katie locked lips, but when Harry opened his mouth, a warm liquid flooded his throat. In a panic not to spoil the moment, Harry desperately freed his mouth and quickly gulped down the deposit Katie had just made. Now in full alarm, Harry realized what he'd done. Did I just swallow Ron's cum?

Harry became red in the face, and panic began to take over. Katie leaned in for another kiss, nonchalant to what had just happened, but Harry dodged her, crawling backward to the edge of the bed. She shrugged, and went back to Ron. Harry sat immobilized, as if hit with a petrification spell. He didn't realize how much time passed when it was finally over, and Ron wordlessly slithered out of the bedroom as if never there to begin with. Harry, filled with both shame and Ron's semen, forced his eyes shut in hopes that he could wake up tomorrow and learn he dreamed this whole ordeal...

"Oh no…" Neville sighed, holding a newspaper in one hand and reaching for an orange juice glass with the other. "The Prophet just released the story about the St. Mungo's breakout. They even cited my name as the one who let all those wizards out. Surely my Gran's gonna hang me by the..."

Harry could not muster himself to give a single shit about what Neville was talking about. He was still unsettled by the events of last night. Harry might have been imagining it, but he could swear there was a heavy tension in the air, as if everyone knew about the threesome. But what bothered Harry the most was that Katie had chosen to sit next to Ron this morning, and was giggling loudly at anything he said. Harry dared a glance at Ron while Neville continued to recount his Gran's favorite punishments. Ron didn't return his eye, but Harry believed he was getting redder in the face.

"...I was bleeding out my bum for 3 days after that." Neville finished sheepishly, a pause emanated in the room.

Katie pointed toward Ginny, "Can you pass the butter?"

Ginny shot a piercing look at Katie, and silently lit a muggle cigarette.

"GENEVA ROSE WEASLEY, PUT THAT DAMNED THING OUT RIGHT THIS INSTANT!" Mrs. Weasley whipped out of her chair furiously, Hugo started crying, and everyone except Luna flinched backward.

Tears welled up in Ginny's eyes, "Ever since Dad died you've been a real bitch."

Now the silence in the room was painful. The enchanted dishes that were washing themselves before even seemed to halt. Mrs. Weasley looked like she'd been hit with a stunning spell. And before she could respond to what had happened, Ginny had stormed out of the burrow.

Harry looked out the window just in time to see Ginny summon her broom, and fly off. He wondered if she ever would return.

"Bollocks" Ron ejaculated.

Author's Note: I'm sorry.