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Chapter 2: Say Goodbye

(Bye Adaline)

Sasuke would remain at the village for one year before his departure. The majority of that time was spent in the prison and at trials, which his old team always attended without fail. Sasuke's cooperation meant that Kakashi, as newly appointed Hokage, could make exceptions to the strict arrangements that had been put in place at the beginning. It was clear Sasuke was willing to partake in his 8 month sentence, quietly and with acceptance. It was part of his redemption journey and it had given him time to think. His only request, however, was that he would still be allowed to train, especially to grow accustomed to his one arm. Sakura had told him they were preparing him a new one, but he honestly wasn't sure if he wanted to take it. Time would only tell what his decision would be on the matter, but until then, he wanted to be as skilled as he was before with two appendages rather than the one.
Upon his release, the remaining months were spent in quiet solitude in the old Uchiha compound. He had made the decision to sell the compound to the hospital, so that Sakura had an area for her children's orphanage-a place so desperately needed after the war. She didn't know what to say. She kept asking if he was sure and he kept telling her to stop being annoying and that it was the least he could do for her. If Sasuke truly wanted to travel, there would be no point in keeping the Uchiha compound standing like a ghostly shell within the village. It had been that way long enough. It was time for him to let go of such a painful burden. He could keep the Uchiha memory alive away from those walls filled with death and betrayal.
Despite Sasuke being aware that
His feelings were beginning to change for his pink haired teammate, he made the decision not to pursue them. His emotions to anything but hatred had been buried for so long, he couldn't quite make sense of them and thought it best to keep his distance. He was kind and courteous, yes, and the day when Sakura had stared at him with uncertain eyes as she linked his one arm through her own and the other with Naruto's, he did not fight it. He didn't want to. He gave her a small smile to let her know it was ok. That they could go back to those times, if she was comfortable with it. He didn't want to do anything to make her uncomfortable. Never again. So that's how it was for those next 4 months. Sakura would drag him away from his solitude for outings with team 7, she would link his arm, ruffle his hair and even thump him on the back when he called her annoying or took Naruto's side. But even during those moments of calm when Sasuke felt like maybe it could be this way forever...that itch to explore and to better understand himself returned. Yes. He had to leave.
The night before his departure Naruto had suggested (albeit forced) that the rookie 9 should get together for food and drinks as a send off for Sasuke. Naturally, Sasuke didn't want the fuss but his teammates had already surprised him at his door and dragged him to the restaurant.
The air was lively as they ordered hot plates of sizzling meats and drank sake, reminiscing about the old days and talking about plans for the future.
"So Shikamaru, when are you seeing Temari again?" Ino asked, her eyebrows wiggling suggestively as she spilled a few drops of sake from her glass.
Shikamaru sighed and lowered his gaze to his drink. "that would be none of your business."
Ino scoffed before slapping him on the back playfully. "It was my business when Sakura and you were dating!"
Sasuke froze. Now he was paying attention. He felt like someone had slammed him in the gut. He didn't like this feeling whatsoever. He wasn't expecting such an instinctive reaction. Jealousy, anger, regret, pain...
"ONE date!" Sakura yelled, pointing a finger at Ino. "There was you thinking we'd have so much in common Ino! It was just awful...Sorry Shikamaru!" Sakura started to laugh and Shikamaru couldn't help but smile.
"No offense taken. Once we disagreed on certain battle tactics I knew there was no hope for us." Shikamaru agreed, shaking his head and the whole table (except Sasuke) burst into laughter.
"Excuse me." Sasuke immediately stood up, the sound of his chair scraping against the floor breaking the sound of the laughter. They looked up at him wordlessly as he slunk out of the restaurant without a word.
"What-what was that all about?" Sakura asked, turning back to face the group.
Her friends turned their gaze to her.
"What do you think that was about? even I can sense the weird tension between you two since he got back." Shikamaru said, a look of exasperation on his face as he exchanged glances with Naruto who was swirling his sake and sighing heavily. "Sakura-"
"ill be right back." Sakura interrupted Naruto as she got up and stormed out of the restaurant, leaving her comrades looking amongst each other with hard frowns.
She found him in the bustling evening streets, walking in the direction of the Uchiha compound, hand stuffed in his pocket. The dangling string lights glittered above them as she rushed after to him.
"Hey!" She yelled but he didn't turn around. "Sasuke!" Still no response. She pushed past the crowds of people, following his retreating figure with determined eyes. "Hey UCHIHA!"
Sasuke finally stopped in his tracks and whipped his head around.
Sakura stumbled to a halt a few feet away from him, panting. "What was that in there?"
"Go away Sakura," Sasuke told her sternly.
"Dammit Sasuke, stop shutting me out!" She yelled, pointing at him furiously as villagers looked on in confusion. "You were absolutely fine then one second you're storming off without a word! it's infuriating!" She took a breath. Took a second to decide if she was going to come out with it. She did. "Are you mad that I went on a date with Shikamaru?"
Sasuke glared at her in frustration as she waited for him to respond. There was no surprise in his mismatched eyes to her question. No scoff, no denial. It made her heart race.
The sound of the crowds echoed around them as he considered his answer carefully.
"I am mad and I have no right to be," Sasuke answered her. Sakura stared at him in bewilderment.
"The date meant nothing. I thought I could date other people but I..." she knew she didn't have to justify herself to him. How many times had he rejected her? How many times had he called her annoying? Why did he care all of a sudden?
Sasuke sighed. "I don't deserve you Sakura."
There it was. Finally, some sort of admission, a hint that maybe, just maybe, he had considered the possibility of loving her back. But his list of sins was too long in his mind. Was it too late for them?Sakura didn't know what to say. She looked defeated, as did he. He walked away once again, disappearing into the crowds before Sakura could even think of a reply.
And in the morning, when she asked him if she could go with him, an admission of her own to him that he DID deserve her what did he say?
No.
But then he tapped her on her forehead, a symbol of something so personal to him that Sakura was yet to understand. "Maybe next time?"