A combined total of 0 (zero) thought was put into this story. You have been warned.
Jaune Arc woke up with a goal.
No.
He woke up with The Goal in his mind.
He would get a gun. A honest-to-Gods gun. So he could shoot Grimm when there was a need to do so.
Why would Jaune Arc need a gun when his sword did the job just fine? Well, several reasons.
First, while the Crocea Mors might have been doing a fine job cutting through monsters, Jaune himself wasn't doing that job well. Not to sound harsh, but he was still fucking shit at it. Having a plan C (Jaune's battle plans all defaulted to plan B's anyway) would help out a ton.
Second reason was much more pressing: occasionally, you just had to keep your distance and shoot things from afar. Jaune was very much lacking in that department. It'd gotten so bad that the he, quite literally, spent more time throwing rocks at Grimm than doing anything else.
You couldn't kill Grimm with a rock. Well, unless you were Glynda Goodwitch with a very handy Semblance, or Nora Valkyrie, who could probably kill Salem with a rock regardless.
Oh wait, he wasn't supposed to know about Salem yet. Too bad! Ozpin could file his complaints and invoice him later. For now, he needed to get a gun.
And there was no finer person to ask for than Ruby Rose. AKA Crater Face. AKA BFF. AKA self-proclaimed highcalibersniperscythe-sexual. It was a faint hope, but maybe she'd be reasonable and not outright resort to trying to get Crocea Mors to mechashift into a machine-gun.
Determination fueling his steps, Jaune made his way towards RWBY's dorm room and knocked. Hopefully, Ruby would open the door so that he'd avoid being glyphed into a wall and frozen there/having door slammed shut in his face/getting teased to death and THEN having door slammed shut in his face respectively. Thankfully, it was Ruby indeed who opened the door, still in her pyjamas and evidently still a bit sleepy.
"Oh, hey Jaune," she yawned.
"Hi, Ruby. Can I come in?" Jaune answered, trying to spot if any of her teammates were inside the room.
"Mmm, sure," Ruby drawled sleepily, motioning Jaune to come in. Luckily for him, the three other girls were absent.
"Sooo, what's up?" Ruby asked from behind him after closing the door.
Jaune thought for a moment on how to best approach this situation. He knew how…enthusiastic the redhead could be about anything related to guns. He had to play his cards right.
How, though? The most perfect idea brewed in his mind. With that very idea, he turned to face his bestie.
"Rubes, I need a motherfucking gun," he said calmly.
In a single moment, all traces of sleepiness, tiredness and emotion altogether drained from Ruby's face. She stared at Jaune with what possibly was the most impressive pokerface known to mankind.
"Ru-"
Jaune didn't get to finish his sentence on account of Ruby downright teleporting across the room sith her Semblance and slapping him.
"Ow! What was that for?" Jaune exclaimed, holding onto his stinging cheek.
"First, that was for using a swear word. Bad words are bad," Ruby explained with in the most un-Ruby-like voice possible, "and second…"
The pokerface was gone, replaced by the happiest expression Jaune had ever seen Ruby don.
"YOU WANT A GUN? OHMYGODS, OHMYGODS, THISISTHEBEST DAY EVER! LETMEHELPYOULETMEHELPYOULETMEHELPYOU!"
Yep, he just about expected that reaction. That did nothing to keep the infectious grin from appearing on his face, too.
"Of course you can help me, Rubes. It's why I came to you in the first place."
As soon as he said those words, Jaune was knocked back onto Blake's bed as Ruby's excited squeals were lost among the cacophony of the girl going ham with her Semblance and littering the entire room with rose petals in a matter of seconds.
"Crater Face, calm down!" Jaune attempted to do the obvious thing. Miraculously, it worked and Ruby stopped just beside him, her hair even more of a frazzled mess than it usually was.
"Okay, okay, sorrybutI'mjust too excited!" the girl breathed heavily, her happiness still evident. "But, umm….what kind of a gun do you want? J-just so I can start planning and drawing blueprints ASAP!"
Jaune stared at her blankly. His brain had already shut down at "what kind of a gun do you want?".
If it wasn't obvious already, Jaune Arc didn't know what kind of a gun he wanted. He hadn't thought about it. Then again, he didn't think this plan of his at all beside "ask Ruby", so that was to be expected.
"I…I don't know," the boy admitted with an embarrassed, sheepish grin.
Ruby wasn't deterred in the slightest. "Oh, um, that's fine! No, wait," she stumbled, "that's even better! Ohmygosh! There's so many things to choose from! I could make you a wrist mounted, heat seeking Dust rocket launcher! Or-or howaboutachainsawlauncher? Orashieldmountedprecisionrifle? OrmaybeIcanaddamachineguntoyoursword-"
Jaune's mind shut down again upon hearing Ruby's frantic monologuing. He didn't know a solid ninety percent of what the hell she was talking about. The boy decided to be forthcoming.
"Ruby," he said evenly, putting a hand on her shoulder, "I am completely illiterate in terms of weapons." When Ruby gave him a questioning look, he continued more confidently, "I understood exactly ten percent of what you offered me. My weapon-knowing progress is stuck somewhere at "Sword kill Grimm equals good".
Ruby lost some of her enthusiasm, but snickered anyways. "Okay, eeh…sorry?" she apologized immediately.
"It's ok," Jaune assured her, "it sounded better in my head anyways. I've been thinking right now, and…I dunno? I don't really want mechashift, 'cause I'll never learn how to…mechashift. I guess I need something I can learn to use and aim with fairly quickly, something that packs a decent punch and I can use one hand, with-with a shield? Like…a revolver?" he threw the suggestion out experimentally.
Ruby instantly adopted a serious, thoughtful expression. After a bit, she voiced her opinion, "Revolvers have recoil that's not beginner friendly, but we could get that solved with practice…but they're mechanically complicated so it's going to be a pain for you to repair or to disassemble and clean it…"
"But reliable, right? I heard they were reliable."
"Oh, oh yeah they're very reliable; but if the mechanism breaks, there's no way you'll put it together yourself. Um, no offence."
"None taken," Jaune waved the girl off. "So does that mean you'll make me a revolver?"
Ruby was so surprised, she took a step back. "What? No, nonono. This is your first gun, Jaune! You can't just pick the first thing you see! We have to exhaust all the options! Um, options that fit under your, um, criteria, that is…"
Well, shit. Looks like Jaune would be stuck in RWBY's room for a long time.
Unaware of her leader-buddy's thoughts, Ruby continued to pour her own thoughts out into words, "A semi-auto or a full-auto pistol could be a better choice, but they don't have good stopping power, and those that do you won't be able to handle very well…" she continued thinking out loud, biting her nails a little.
Suddenly, she turned to Jaune with sparkling eyes. "I could make you a high-caliber, one-handed pistol that's also very simple to maintain. But it'd have to be a one-shot…" she ended with quiet bitterness in her voice.
Jaune shook his head, himself upset at having to upset the girl, "By the time I manage to hit something with that shot, Pyrrha will probably have taken care of everything already."
Ruby winced. "Yeah, that's about right. Not to m- oh my god, how are you going to reload with one hand? You have a shield too!" the redhead pulled at her hair.
A few minutes have passed in uncomfortable silence, neither side too sure of what to come up with.
"Double barrel!" Jaune suddenly blurted out.
Ruby looked up to him quizzically.
"You know, like, a sawed off one! I don't have to aim, and it's, um, simple in terms of taking it apart, right?" the boy explained enthusiastically.
His companion pursed her lips. "Yes, but…the range…I think you'd be better off using your sword there."
Oh, of course. The range! The very cause of why he sought to get a gun In the first place!
And he straight up forgot about it.
Jaune facepalmed with a heavy sigh, the action drawing a snicker from Ruby which abruptly cut off.
"The range…you could use slugs for the range!" she exclaimed excitedly.
Jaune's mind didn't shut down this time; instead it decided to conjure up the image of him firing an actual, living slug out of a double barrel shotgun first, and then shut down.
Seeing the unspoken question in the boy's eyes (while the boy's brain urgently tried to reboot itself), Ruby Rose rolled her eyes. "You know how shotguns have many tiny pellets that disperse and do nothing against armor, like-like the armor Grimm have? A slug is just a super-huge, single bullet that hits through just about everything."
"Wow, sounds great."
"But," Ruby continued, and Jaune was about ready to jump out of a window from frustration, "first: slugs hit back hard. Like, really hard. Newbie like you's guaranteed to be knocked down on your butt. Second: a sawed off shotgun doesn't allow for much range, so you'd be getting no use from them anyways…"
"Okay, I need range on a shotgun. How I get range on a shotgun?" Jaune insisted.
"By having a longer barrel that isn't short and all mangled, duh," Ruby responded as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. It probably was, just not to her current companion.
"Cool! That, uh, sounds…great? Yeah, super great," Jaune eloquently responded back. "So how about it?"
"Ehhh…" Ruby shrugged, "it could work…But with just one arm, you'd be making your wrist feel very not nice trying to fire it…"
"Wait…Can I use my Aura for that? To-to deal with the recoil!" Jaune asked in turn.
Ruby considered it. "Yep! It's how I learned to shoot my baby without being recoiled into walls!"
Excited, Jaune got off Blake's bed. "Great, so how about-"
"But your double barrel would only have to shots. Um, twice as good as one shot, but not enough."
"-we discuss the doub…"
Without getting to finish the sentence, Jaune plopped back onto the bed dejectedly.
"Sorry, Jaune," Ruby apologized again, sheepishly.
"This sucks," he sighed, staring at the floor.
"Yup. I know. It was really hard picking a suitable firearm for Crescent Rose too. But, for what it's worth, maybe a revolver is the best option for you. Sorta-classic weapon for a sorta-classic knight, y'know?"
"Maybe…" Jaune sighed tiredly. Who'd have thought gun-talks were so exhausting? Wait…knight…
Jaune's head shot up, his blue eyes locking with Ruby's silver ones, startling the girl a little.
"The knight! Ruby, have you seen that movie, the, uhh…" Curse his brain for forgetting one movie he'd seen so many times!
"Umm.." Ruby slowly blinked.
Jaune perked up. "The…Oh! The "Atlesian Knightminator 2"! Have you seen it?!" he asked frantically.
Atlesian Knightminator? Oh, she'd seen it plenty of times. Wasn't close to being her favorite, but it was Yang's favorite, which meant often having to watch it anyways.
Jaune felt a hopeful smile bloom on his face as Ruby nodded. "That gun the Knightminator used! The one with the lever-thing on the bottom!"
"Lever…thing…" Ruby slowly mumbled and then facepalmed so hard she sent herself tumbling down.
Lever action! How could she have forgotten about it!
"Ruby! You okay?" Jaune jumped up, startled and somewhat jealous to see the girl have superior facepalming techniques.
Ruby, on the other hand, was not very much happy about having said techniques. "Yowch… Lever action shotguns…how could I have forgotten…"
"So…it that a sign that it's not the answer here?" Jaune asked as he helped the fellow leader up.
"Uuf.." Ruby shook her head dizzily, then started thinking, "you know…it is an option, actually."
"Really?"
"Yeah," Ruby continued after catching her breath, "longer barrel, about…six shots before reload for good measure…can rifle it to accept slugs…or maybe two different interchangeable barrels for buckshot too? Yeah, sounds better…" she kept mumbling, fully absorbed in the thought process.
"And I can fire it one-handed, right?" Jaune asked hopefully.
"Fire one h-? Oh, yep, I can make the lever loop bigger to account for that," Ruby shot him a smile and a nod.
"Wha? Why'd you need to make it bigger?"
"'Cause otherwise you'll hurt your fingers trying to spin it, dummy," Ruby tiptoed and tried to ruffle Jaune's hair, failing miserably and only poking his nose.
"I-ow-achoo!" Jaune sneezed from said poking, making the girl jump back. "But the Knightminator did it just fine in the movies…" he continued with slight disappointment in his voice.
"I know he did, but you shouldn't try it. Trust me, Jaune, ok?"
"Um, sure." A metaphorical lightbulb lit up above his head. "Wait, did you try it?"
Ruby looked off to the side.
"I don't know…"
Clueless as Jaune usually was, even he could see through Ruby right now. He shook his head with a smile.
"Not funny," Ruby pouted.
"Okay, okay, my bad," Jaune barely forced the smirk off his face. "So will you do it?"
Ruby's pout was gone, replaced with a determined expression. "I can do it, yeah. But…are you sure?"
Was he sure? How could he not be sure? He'd have a viable ranged weapon, and would look like Knightminator at the same time! He was as sure of this as of the desire to be a Huntsman!
"Yes."
"Okay. Um. It's just that…lever action weapons aren't the most reliable, or mechanically simple. The revolver...maybe it'd be a better option for you."
Jaune considered her opinion for an entire 0.3 seconds, then voiced a determined "No."
Ruby shrugged her shoulders, "Okay."
In the next second, she was flying around the room again.
"OHMYGOSH, IMGONNAMAKEJAUNEAGUN!"
Jaune couldn't resist laughing along Ruby's excited squeals. That is, until she suddenly appeared right in front of his face with a dead-serious expression.
"But you, mister," she poked Jaune in the chest, almost sending him flying into the drawers, "you better know what to be doing with it! Revolver is easy; lever action is not. I need to you know how your weapon will work, so you can take care of it. And you better take care of it as if you were….um, a father and she was your newborn baby! Yeah! Like that!" she finished a bit awkwardly.
"Of course, Rubes," Jaune adopted the same expression, "I'll hit the books, the CCNet – everything. Just…maybe give me a few pointers where to start?" he scratched his head sheepishly.
"Yep!" Ruby nodded back, "Now shoo! I need to start drawing blueprints right away!" she dragged him to exit, barely containing the excitement in her voice.
"Okay! Thanks, Rubes!" Jaune called out from beyond the dorm room already, then started walking away towards his own room with a spring In his step. Given how it was Saturday, he could maybe get started on researching right away.
The familiar rosy bloom interrupted his walk, its' owner appearing right in front of him with wide eyes.
"Waitwaitwait Jaune!" Ruby coughed out, "I'll need Crocea Mors too!"
His sword? "Why?" Jaune voiced his confusion.
"I need it! For-for the blueprints!" she gulped.
Jaune tilted his head, then shrugged and with a simple "Sure" made it to his own dorm, quietly got inside so as to not wake Pyrrha (who was still blissfully drooling away in dreamworld despite it being like 11 am), grabbed his weapon, then made it back out towards Ruby impatient form.
"Can you, um, not turn the sword, or shield into the lever action too?" Jaune semi-pleaded while handing his family's relic to the redhead's mercy.
"I won't, I won't!" Ruby exclaimed as she sped away towards her dorm.
Somewhy, Jaune wasn't sure she was being entirely truthful.
Stay tuned for part two: "Where Jaune actually gets his motherfucking gun(tm)
EDIT 2022-03-23: Fixed minor mistakes here-there
