The family room was quiet. Even the house had stopped shaking. Then something hit his back, hard. At first Sebastien thought that it was another tree, knocking down the roof and crushing him, but trees don't have soft warm bodies and flexible arms that bend in just the right the squeeze the breath of a person. Trees don't smell like his brother's smell, or shake with sobs. There was vibrating on his back, and he realized belatedly that Matteo was speaking to him, and wiggled to free himself from Matteo's grasp, but the grip just got tighter.

He spoke, carefully choosing and forming his words to sound normal.

"Matteo, it's okay. Let me go so we can talk."

Finally, Matteo let go, and Sebastien turned to face him. It had been almost a year since he'd last seen Matteo, and a part of him had been expecting him to be completely different, while the other part of him thought maybe he'd be the exact same, but neither was the case. Matteo's eyes were red-rimmed and sharp, and he glared at Sebastien in a familiar way that was unfamiliar on his face. Matteo looked like Lovino as he clenched his shaking fists, opening and closing his mouth multiple times as though trying to decided what to say first.

"I thought you were dead!"

Finally, Matteo decided on what he wanted to say, and the words froze Sebastien in place. He hadn't thought about how his brother might react to not getting a response, what that might make him think. Suddenly, he had a vivid image of what he would have thought and felt if Matteo was in his place, and he thought he understood why Matteo was angry, even though he'd been crying.

He didn't remember exactly what he said, but he knew he apologized, in that weird phenomenon where he somehow spoke eloquently without ever making a conscious thought about what he was saying. He didn't hear his own voice, or Matteo's response, but he knew he was speaking. Whatever he said seemed to calm his younger brother down, at least a little, though Matteo still seemed shaken as he reluctantly released Sebastien from his grip. Sebastien still couldn't help but notice how Matteo' s hands were shaking on his sleeve as he caught the last bits of Matteo's words when his brother dragged his sleeve across his face to wipe his tears.

"-worried about you."

A part of him rejected those words, and he wanted to snap at Matteo "How could you say that when you left me like that?" but he didn't say those words. Sebastien knew that if he was in Matteo's shoes he'd feel the same way, regardless of who left first, even if he was angry or mad at his younger brother, he knew he'd come flying in the same panic if something ever happened to Matteo, so instead he offered a blithe apology, excusing himself to the kitchen briefly to get Matteo some spiced wine to calm his brother down.

Chris would have freaked out if he saw this, Sebastien thought with a wry smile as he reached for the wine. He remembered how Chris had panicked the first time he saw Sebastien drinking wine, since Americans don't drink until they're adults, but as a pure-blooded Italian he couldn't imagine not drinking wine, especially at a time like this. He still remembered how Matteo's hands shook.

Sebastien couldn't hear the sound of the wine pouting into the glass, or the sound of the glasses chime as he poured himself one too, or even the sound of his own footsteps as he walked back to Matteo. Somehow he didn't feel disconcerted by that at all, and once again Sebastien realized something was very wrong with him. But Matteo was sitting there on the couch, looking like he'd discovered something devastating, and Sebastien couldn't afford to think about himself at a time like this.

Matteo's hands were shaking so badly he couldn't accept the glass Sebastien offered him, and he set it down on the coffee table instead. Matteo didn't reach for the glass, and just stared at Sebastien fiercely. Sebastien avoided his gaze, not sure what to say, and focused on his mouth so he wouldn't miss anything that Matteo said. Finally, Matteo broke the silence.

"Are you really okay?"

Sebastien offered his best imitation of Feliciano's dopey grin.

"Si! Not hurt at all!"

For some reason Matteo only looked more upset at the words, and Sebastien wondered if Matteo thought he was lying. He didn't ask, though, and Matteo didn't ask. Instead he watched Sebastian blankly for a moment before finally speaking.

"Your phone is ringing. Shouldn't you pick up?"

With a start, Sebastien remembered he'd thrown his phone to the side without answering any of his texts. Giovanni and Elizabeta were probably concerned. He jumped to his feet and dug through the blankets to retrieve his phone, but by the time he grabbed it, the phone screen was blank and black, as though no call ever came through. Sebastian thought he must have missed the call, and told Matteo as such as he turned around. Matteo stood up suddenly.

"I'm going to tell Giovanni that you're okay."

He stalked out of the room, and even though Sebastien didn't hear the door slam, he knew Matteo had gone outside to make the call. When Matteo came back in, Sebastian heard the door click shut with a sudden rush of sounds returning to him, and for the first time in a long time was grateful for the return of the sound.

Matteo had been very quiet when he came back in, and eventually had told him he should stay with Matteo at his place. Sebastien refused. He knew it was clinging to an impossible dream, but to him that house represented Family, and even destroyed, it had already brought one brother to his side. Part of Sebastien still hoped that his other brothers would also return home to him, and he wanted to, no, needed to, be there when they came. Seeing that he couldn't convince Sebastien, Matteo had boldly announced he'd stay with Sebastien, even though his bedroom was completely out of commission.

In the following days, it went silent less often than usual, but still too often for Sebastien's preference, and he worried that Matteo would find out. The first day, Matteo had helped Sebastien seal off the hallway with plastic and tape to keep the cold air and other forces of nature out of the remaining part of the house. The second day, Matteo insisted that Sebastien shouldn't go to school or work, and brought him to the hospital instead. The examination had declared him completely unharmed, and Matteo had argued with the doctor while Sebastien stared in surprise at his usually sweet brother throwing a fit.

On the third day, it was silent when Giovanni arrived, and Sebastien didn't hear him come in the house. He didn't hear it when Matteo greeted him or went to help bring the bags in. He didn't notice the actions either, focusing on his homework that he hadn't been able to finish a couple days ago. He didn't hear when Giovanni stood a few feet behind him and called his name, or when Matteo suddenly shouted to get his attention. He'd only found out these events occurred much later.

He remembered it was incredibly silent, he was suffering through his Math as best he could, then suddenly there were strong arms he hadn't felt since he was very young wrapping around him and he turned with a start and a slight bit of panic to see who was holding him and why. He'd relaxed once he saw Giovanni's face, and once again felt incredibly guilty when he saw his eldest brother's eyes glittering with tears. Giovanni must have still been concerned, even after Matteo called him and Sebastien had finally texted to let him know he was alright.

Then Giovanni had spoken, and Sebastien's heart sank and his blood went cold when he read his brother's lips.

"Why didn't you tell me you couldn't hear?"

He hadn't meant to deny it, he didn't plan to lie to his brother, but something inside wiggled and protested the thought of admitting it, he was the only one who didn't cause trouble, he couldn't change it now. He didn't think about what to say or know what was said, but somehow he knew he'd lied by the way Giovanni's face crumpled and Matteo's face twisted, and too late, Sebastien realized that somehow, both his brothers already knew.

He felt an incredible sinking feeling in his chest, and felt like he was shrinking into himself. He didn't know why he was scared, he knew Giovanni would never blame him, no it was more likely for Giovanni to blame himself. But Sebastien wouldn't want that either, and somehow disappointing his brother felt like he'd lost something he'd worked very hard to build up, but he didn't know why. Matteo looked angry, but Giovanni just looked sad and hurt, and Sebastien didn't like that.

The last time he'd seen his oldest brother, he'd been glowing and happy and looked young and free. Now, because of Sebastien, he had aged again, looking tired and worried and weary. That made Sebastien feel more guilty. He'd never thought too hard about it, but after the death of their Grandpa, who had raised them in place of a parent, it was Giovanni who had been forced into a role of parent. Sebastien had only been a selfish five year old then, and hadn't thought about anything that wasn't him. He'd barely paid attention to his three-year-old little brother either, but now that he was older, the implications seemed obvious.

Giovanni had only been fourteen, the same age Matteo was now, when he'd been forced to act as a parent for four bratty, selfish little brothers. Sebastien couldn't imagine how Matteo would have been able to cope with tha, he couldn't imagine how he would be able to cope with that if it was him, and he thought he knew why Giovanni had always looked so tired, why he'd chosen to hide away from the fighting and avoid his family, and why his oldest brother had looked so young when he finally left.

Giovanni looked close to tears now, and Sebastien didn't want to make his older brother crumple under the weight of being a brother again. He smiled, somewhat sheepishly, and carefully made his confession.

"I'm sorry. It's on and off, so I thought I'd just wait it out. I didn't mention it because I didn't want to worry anyone.".

The lie felt weird, like he was doing something wrong, but Sebastien didn't know what a better option would be. He didn't want to tell Giovanni that it had been happening for nine years know, because then Giovanni would want to know why he didn't say anything, and Sebastien couldn't answer that question. He couldn't tell Giovanni that it was because he didn't want trouble, he knew his older brother would blame himself. But still, Sebastien didn't like lying like this.

Matteo grabbed his arm to get his attention, and Sebastien followed his brother's lips.

"You're sure this never happened before?"

Sebastien's heart skipped a beat. Did Matteo know? It wasn't impossible, Sebastien wasn't sure how well he'd hidden it, but he was certain a great deal of the reason no one found out was because everyone was so busy with themselves. But Giovanni was standing close by, and Sebastien couldn't let his older brother find out. So he smiled and responded lightly.

"Si, of course not!"

Matteo frowned, and when he spoke, Sebastien flinched despite himself as he read his younger brother's lips.

"Fratello, did you know?"

Sebastian suddenly felt like he should stop Matteo, that whatever his younger brother was about to say would ruin everything. Almost without thinking he reached to cover Matteo's mouth, but the words were already out.

"Whenever you lie, you smile."

Matteo stepped back out of Sebastien's arm reach, and his hands dropped to his lap, shaking. Sebastien decided to feign ignorance.

"Matteo, why would you think that? I never -"

But Sebastien stopped speaking suddenly, because he could feel the unnatural smile pulling at his lips. Was he really that obvious? How long had Matteo known? Was that why his youngest brother had left? Because he was tired of Sebastien lying to him? Matteo crouched down so he was able to meet Sebastien's downcast eyes, his brothers bright green eyes fierce.

"See?"

He felt like something much bigger than the house was falling apart, and desperately looked away from Matteo. He shouldn't have done that. He'd wished he hadn't looked. Because Giovanni was making a horrible twisted up face that Sebastien really, really, hated. Matteo tapped his arm for attention, but Sebastien couldn't look away from Giovanni's face. Naturally, his youngest brother did what bratty siblings do best: he reached up and forced Sebastien to look at him, staring flatly into his older brother's eyes, and a detached part of Sebastien remembered how it felt to try to comfort his heartbroken older brother, after Feliciano's crush had that accident.

It was a crushing feeling, because it hadn't take Sebastien much time to realize nothing he did would make it better. It had taken much longer for him to give up trying. It used to go silent all the time when Feliciano cried, and Sebastien had been grateful for the sense of relief it gave him. It wasn't that he resented Feliciano for his tears and heartbreak. No, it was because he resented himself for not being able to fix it. He hoped he wasn't making Matteo feel the same way.

"Why are you hiding it from me?"

Matteo looked close to tears when he said those words, his lower lip quivering. Sebastian wondered if there was any reason he couldn't tell Matteo anyways. Matteo wasn't like his older brothers, he'd never been overly busy, he'd never ignored Sebastien or told Sebastien that he didn't cause him trouble. For better or for worse, Sebastien thought that Matteo didn't have much expectations for him. His younger brother wouldn't care if he told him. Matteo wouldn't judge him.

But... Sebastien glanced at Giovanni from the corner of his eye, and Giovanni still looked shaken and slightly grey. If his oldest brother reacted this badly to just the idea... Sebastien couldn't ever let him find out. But he was too late, someone else had already figured it out. Matteo sat back on his heels, following Sebastien's gaze, then looked back at Sebastien with wise eyes, speaking to himself, but Sebastien could still read his lips.

"You're not trying to hide it from me at all. It's Vanni that you're hiding it from."

Giovanni made a choked sobbing sound, and belatedly, Sebastien realized he could hear it, but it was already too late. Everything had fallen apart.

Feliciano and Lovino arrived that evening, and Sebastien learned that he hadn't hidden anything as well as he'd thought. Matteo had suspected something was off for a while, and had been testing him ever since arrived, but even before then, he'd been suspicious. Giovanni hadn't been the only one that Matteo called when he confirmed it. Feliciano caught Sebastien in a tight hug, speaking so fast that Sebastian couldn't even tell what his brother was saying, but Lovino leveled him with a flat and sharp look.

Giovanni and Matteo hadn't asked anything more on the issue, and had silently accepted it when Sebastien told them he could hear them again, and now Sebastien knew why. For the first time in a very long time, all of the brothers were together again, in a broken house full of broken memories, and a family that was on the verge of breaking too. Sebastien's dream had come true in the worst possible way.

Lovino took charge of the interrogation, with sharp questions and no room for excuses.

"How long?"

Part of Sebastien had been lying for so long already that he automatically began to think of excuses, a different answer that could make everything easier, a way so no one got hurt. But the larger part of Sebastien knew it was already too late. Giovanni looked the same as he used too, tired and tight, and Feliciano looked like he was about to cry, just like he always used to. Lovino was just as angry as he's always been, and just like before, Sebastien was caught in the middle. Just like always.

The only one who wasn't the same was Matteo, the one who used to sleep through the fighting, now standing behind Lovino with his arms crossed, looking upset and concerned. Sebastien wondered how much Matteo had guessed, how much he knew. He wondered if Matteo would be able to tell if he lied. But he'd been lying for a long time now, and Sebastien was tired of the same relationship his family had. A very small voice in his head was daring to hope that maybe something might change if he did. So Sebastien didn't lie.

"Since I was seven."

He admitted the words with a shrug, not quite able to meet anyone's eyes, wishing for once he couldn't hear the reactions, from Feliciano's gasp, to Giovanni's whispered "That long?" , to Lovino's disgruntled huff, to Matteo's declaration of "I knew it!"

His other brothersall turned to look at Matteo, and Lovino asked what they were all thinking, in his same harsh way.

"You knew?"

Sebastien's heart was sinking, though he wasn't quite sure why. Was it because he hadn't been as good at hiding it as he thought? No, that wasn't it. Sebastien felt even guiltier as he figured it out. Despite all of his efforts, he'd probably made Mattie feel the same way his older brothers felt about him. Lovino was angry, and he snapped at Matteo.

"Why didn't you tell us?"

Matteo was angry too, and snapped back.

"Who was I supposed to tell? You were always fighting, or gone away, and I never even saw Vanni! Besides, the only one who even cared about me was Seb!"

Giovanni shot his feet.

"That's not true!"

Sebastien could see tears glittering in the corners of Feliciano's eyes as his third oldest brother looked between the youngest and the oldest of his brothers. He felt like he was drowning. In the end, nothing changed. Matteo responded angrily to Giovanni.

"Oh really! Did you even remember I exist? Did you remember he exists? If you cared about either of us, you would have noticed sooner!"

It happened again, Sebastian realized, just like how it happened the first time. Suddenly, finally, everything was quiet again. Feliciano, like Sebastien predicted, burst into tears, and Giovanni opened his mouth to say something back. Sebastien closed his eyes. He didn't want to know. He didn't want to read the fighting on their lips, just like he didn't want to hear it. No, it would be better not to know. Just like all those years before, he was surrounded by fighting, but only for Sebastien, at least, there was silence in the Family Room.

He couldn't remember why he'd ever wanted to hear the noise, why he'd wanted his family back hear again like this. He thought he romanticized their time together too much, thst he'd forgotten what it was like. He tried to remember the good times he had with each of them, his happiest memories.

Sebastien couldn't think of one. All of his happy memories were sad ones. His happy memories with Feliciano was comforting his brother after Feliciano had been crying, his happy memories with Lovino was Lovino's grudging praise on his cooking, cooking that Sebastien had done alone after all his brother's stormed out. Giovanni's warm hand ruffling his curls, right before He'd silenced Sebastien's chance to speak. His oldest brother's happy face when he moved out.

Even his memories with Matteo were sad. Matteo's bright eyes as Sebastien told him a story to distract his brother from the fighting. Matteo's proud look when Sebastien had praised him on good grades, because no one else had time to notice or care. Matteo finally coming to visit him, but only because he'd thought Sebastien had died. The more he tried to remember, the more he felt like his happy memories were like the missing photos on the wall. Just like the photos, he knew they'd been there, but when he looked for them, they were gone. Just like the pictures, they reminded Sebastien of things that didn't exist anymore.

The picture of Lovino and Feliciano together was just a reminder that now they were not. The picture of Sebastien and Giovanni just reminded him how broken their relationship was now. Even the picture that had made Sebastien so proud as a child, to hold his Baby brother Matteo on his lap with a bright smile, seemed like a reminder that he wasn't the big brother he'd wanted to be for his baby brother. Every individual picture reminded Sebastien of how split they were. He wondered if they'd ever had a picture together as a family, or if that too was something that he could never experience.

There was a hand on his shoulder, and Sebastien jerked back to reality, expecting Matteo, but it was Feliciano's golden brown eyes he found himself staring into, full of concern and still wet from tears. Sebastien dropped his gaze to read his brother's lips.

"Fratellino? Are you okay?"

Sebastien thought it was a stupid question. How could he possibly be okay? How could anything be okay? But he had to be okay, didn't he? Just like Giovanni's words all those years ago, Sebastien was the good brother who didn't cause trouble. He blinked, then felt his familiar smile take over.

"Si ! It's nothing different than normal, after all!"

Immediately, he wanted to kick himself for letting those bitter words slip in, and Feliciano drew back his hand from Sebastien's shoulder, looking startled. Sebastien wondered if he'd always been this bitter, or if he was changing into a worse person than he'd been before. But he knew his older brother, and Feliciano was nice, and wanted to believe nice things, so he knew there was no way his brother would understand his own words.

"Don't lie to us!"

The sharp blow to his head came from Lovino, who was sporting a strange look of a mixture between his usual frustration and annoyance, and a look that was almost similar to Feliciano's face when he cried. Sebastien stared at Lovino's face in awe and apprehension. He'd never seen this expresssion on his second eldest brother's face before, but he knew his brother well enough to guess what it meant. Like always, Lovino was about to yell.

Then Lovino turned, hearing something that Sebastien couldn't, then looked back at Sebastien sharply.

"You can't hear me right now?"

Sebastien flinched. Of course it was obvious, he hadn't reacted at all during their fighting, it was only natural that they'd figure it out. But...a small voice in Sebastien's head whispered "But they never noticed before."

Since he couldn't hide it, Sebastien only shrugged sheepishly.

"Somehow it happened again."

Lovino blinked, and Feliciano grabbed his brother's arm.

"Ah, Matteo was right! His voice is deeper when he can't hear!"

This was news to Sebastien, and he temporarily forgot what he'd been thinking of as he responded.

"It is?"

Matteoappeared in his line of sight.

"Si! I noticed a lot when we were young, but sometimes you'd sound different when you talked or told stories to me!"

Matteo's face twisted.

"Then when I turned twelve I began to figure out why."

Sebastien hurriedly changed the subject.

"I can't tell at all. Does it sound Weird?"

Then there was an unfamiliar hand on his head, ruffling his hair, and Lovino gave him a sort of half- smirk, half-smile.

"No, you sound cool, like me."

Without meaning too, Sebastien put a hand to his head when Lovino just as quickly drew his hand away. He couldn't remember Lovino ever doing something of the sort in the past, not even when he complemented Sebastien. Sebastien wasn't sure how to react to the feeling. Lovino's hand was smaller than Giovanni's and less gentle, but Sebastien didn't dislike the awkward roughness. He didn't dislike the strange smirk-smile that Lovino had given him either. Sebastien hadn't realized he'd been staring at Lovino until Lovino's face changed back to his usual "this-is-awkward-and-I-don't-like-it expression.

Sebastien realized he was probably making a funny face, and quickly dropped his hand, and looked away. Feliciano looked tearful, but then again, Feliciano always looked tearful in most of Sebastien's memories, so it was hard for him to tell the reason. He didn't expect to be accosted by Feliciano, gathered into a tight squeezing hug that Feliciano liked to give so freely to other people - but Sebastien couldn't remember ever being on the receiving end of a hug that wasn't just him comforting Feliciano.

The hug felt different than he remembered, and after a moment, Sebastien figured it out. This time, it wasn't his third eldest brother comforting him, and not the other way around. Sebastien didn't know how he should respond. Was this a situation where he should hug back? Or would that confuse his older brother and make the situation feel more awkward? Sebastien looked towards Lovino, the one who probably knew Feliciano the best, hoping to find the answer in his brother's face. But Lovino was turned away, gesturing with hsi hands whole he talked to Giovanni, and Giovanni looked serious and tried as he responded.

Matteo looked just as bemused by Feliciano's sudden hug, but still mouthed the words to Sebastien.

"Stupido! When someone hugs you, hug them back!"

Matteo's instructions only made him feel helpless as he awkwardly attempted to return the hug. It wasn't as though he'd never hugged anyone, he'd often hugged Matteo when they were kids or held him on his lap, and he had vague memories of Giovanni holding him in his arms when he was young, and Feliciano squeezing him in a hug when he was just barely passed the toddler stage, but it all felt incredibly long ago and fake, and it was more awkward than he'd expected. Feliciano didn't seem to care, and hummed his approval into Sebastien's hair.

Sebastien had expected Feliciano to eventually let go,, but Feliciano seemed quite happy to stay like that, squeezing Sebastien, and to his surprise, Sebastien felt himself sinking into the hug, feeling like he'd finally received something he hadn't realized he was craving. He felt Feliciano's breathe on the back of his neck, and realized his brother was speaking, and reluctantly, Sebastien wiggled to break the contact. Feliciano didn't want to let go, but finally released Sebastien when he complained.

"I can't read your lips so I don't know what you're saying!"

Feliciano pulled back, and Sebastien looked at his brother's face, expectantly, waiting for Feliciano to speak. But Feliciano was making a very un-Feliciano-like face, not quite as though he wanted to cry, but still very upset, and instead of answering, he just shook his head. Lovino stuck a hand in between them to get Sebastien's attention, and Sebastien looked towards his second eldest brother. Lovino had his brow furrowed as he asked.

"You can read lips?"

Sebastien shrugged, trying to keep it light-hearted as he responded, to make it seem like a good thing instead of something bad.

"I just picked it up."

He'd had too, in order to live regularly with his condition, but he didn't want to remind his brothers of that. He didn't want them to ask anymore questions. He didn't want to answer that one specific question. But he couldn't avoid it, and Sebastien felt a weird combination of fear, guilt, and apprehension when Giovanni appeared in his view, walking over and crouching down so his face was even with Sebastien's from where he sat on the sofa. Then Giovanni asked the one question that Sebastien didn't want to answer.

"Why didn't you tell us?"

Sebastien's face twisted, and he forced himself not to make a bitter smile. A part of him felt outraged and offended that it was Giovanni, out of all of them, who had asked. That same part of him also was feeling a nasty glee at Giovanni knowing that it was his fault, of finally making his brother's understand-

But Sebastien swallowed that part down. The greater part of him, though only by a little, couldn't do that too his brothers. He shrugged, and spoke as lightly as he could, with an awkward smile.

"Everyone just had their own problems. I figured it wasn't that big of a deal."

It was a lie, and he knew that, but what else could he say? From the very first time it happened, Sebastien had known that something was terribly wrong, and it was a big deal. Even when he'd heard Giovanni's careless words, he'd known he should tell him anyways, that Giovanni would have wanted it. The truth was the painful reality that Sebastien hadn't told Giovanni because he was scared that his brother would give him the same tired and empty look his gave his older brothers, and avoid Sebastien too. The truth was the longer it went on, the more scared he was. Sebastien didn't also want to be sent away to live somewhere else, like the other problem children. Like Feliciano and Lovino.

How could he say that to Giovanni's worn face? But Giovanni seemed to already know, and he have Sebastien a firm and sad look.

"Sebastian."

A command.

"Was it because of me?"

This time, Sebastien was prepared, and his smile didn't flinch as he responded, covering years of childhood stress with a blanket of easy excuses.

"I just wanted to be a good Fratello," he looked towards Matteo as he spoke his last words, "to all of you."

He shouldn't have looked, because Matteo looked like he'd eaten some bad pasta, and Sebastien could see his words being spoken clearly.

"But Fratello, you're smiling."

Lovino and Feliciano looked confused, but Giovanni looked like he too, was going to cry, and Sebastien hung his head, remembering how Matteo had pointed out his tell earlier. It was easy to know that his smiled when he lied, but harder to chance a habit formed over many, many years of practice. Giovanni's hands were shaking, but he still met Sebastien's face bravely.

"I'm sorry."

For the first time in his life, Sebastien saw his eldest brother cry. He was sure that Giovanni had cried at their Grandpa's funeral, but Sebastien had only been five at the time, and the memories were basically non-existent. Giovanni's shoulders shook, but his tears fell silently down his face, one after another, as Giovanni spoke in a voice that Sebastien could only imagine the tone of.

"It's my fault."

Sebastien opened his mouth to protest, almost instinctively, but Giovanni shook his head to hush him, then made a terrible, cruel confession.

"I knew. I knew that you had something to say to me that time, but I was tired and I didn't want to hear that, so I said it on purpose. I told you that you didn't cause trouble because I knew that you wouldn't if I said that. I'm sorry. It's my fault."

Then, like a drop of a dime, the sounds came roaring back in: the trees, rustling in the high winds outside, the creaking of the house, rustling of his own clothes, and the curse from Lovino and the gasp from Feliciano, and the telling silence from Matteo, but above all of those noises, the inescapable and heart-shattering sound of his eldest brother breaking down into tears in front of Sebastien, and perhaps a worse sound yet, the soft whimper that tore from his own throat as he held back his own tears.

In less than a full day, he'd gotten everything he'd ever dared to want- his family back together, comfort from Feliciano, recognition from Lovino, the chance to tell the truth, even revenge on Giovanni for his cruel words all those years ago. Finally, even his hearing. But Sebastien had never wanted any of those things less in that moment. For the hundredth time, or even the thousandth, like always when there was trouble between his brothers, Sebastien wished for the times when things went silent.

And yet, in perhaps the cruelest thing that the universe had ever seen fit to do to Sebastien, in this one time he craved it the most, there was no silence in the family room.


Eldest Brother, Giovanni = Vatican City
Second Eldest, Lovino = Romano, South Italy
Third Eldest, Feliciano = Veniciano, North Italy
Second Youngest, Sebastien = Seborga
Youngest Brother, Matteo = San Marino