Kate's POV

I sat with Rick on the living room floor as we flipped through the multiple photo albums. It had been almost three hours since we had come downstairs, and Rick had felt weak from all the crying and screaming. He was just silent now, tears still in his eyes as he clumsily flipped through the pages. We sat shoulder to shoulder as he studied each photo. I didn't comment on any of them. Instead I just sat silently as he looked at them all. One of the photos involved him and the rest of the family at one of Angel's birthday parties. It was a picture of Rick, Angel and his parents huddled around a birthday cake. A birthday cake which had only one candle on it in the shape of a nine. The two looked so young in this picture, but even then the relationship between the two never changed. Rick seemed to have the biggest smile on his face as his arm was wrapped around his sister as she blew out the candle. They're parents merely two feet from them with smiles on both of they're faces as well, of course nowhere near exaggerated.

Rick softly rubbed his thumb across the picture as he sniffed quietly. He then flipped the page to reveal even more photos from that day. They must have taken a lot of pictures. They all ranged from Angel opening her presents, to Rick having chats with his friends even. I even got to see Humphrey and Lilly in a few of them. Shaky however was only in one, and it was him and Angel posing for a cute photo. I sighed before finally standing up.

"Are you… are you hungry Rick?" I asked as softly as I could. Rick shook his head and flipped the page. I knew how it felt to be so upset and people asking you if you were hungry. I never ate when I was upset, but still I thought I would ask. Maybe Rick was the same way. Not to mention all the crying and lack of food… and alcohol which judging by the empty bottles was a lot. He had to have had a terrible headache. "Rick, you have to eat something," I said.

"I don't wanna eat" Rick muttered, not looking up from the album. My eyes darted away from him as I felt guilt. I knew he had a bad headache as well, I was starting to get one from everything. I knelt over and felt his hand which was really sensitive and fragile now. He shook a bit from being so weak from everything and then looked over at me as I touched him.

"Sorry" I said, taking my hand off of him. Rick simply went back to the album and kept on looking through it. I Sighed and stood back up to go up the stairs. I walked passed the bathroom for a second to look into his parents room. The bottle still lay there, and the alcohol which spilled out had dried. Other empty bottles around it though signified that Rick had already had his fair share. I don't think he had ever drank alcohol before all of this, so he must have been really out of it. I took a peek across the room to see that many bottle still remained in the cabinet. I would have to try and keep him away from them. Drinking isn't the answer. I left the room and stepped into the bathroom, walking around the bloodied clothes and looking in the small cabinet for pills until I found what I was looking for. "Headache relief" the bottle read. I opened it and took two pills for myself, using the water from the sink faucet to ease my own oncoming headache. I then gripped the rim of the sink and exhaled shakily. I hoped I was doing the right thing.

I took two more pills out and then closed the bottle. I didn't put it away though because I would probably need it later. I brought them downstairs and placed the bottle on the small table next to the couch, and then sat down next to Rick again. He had gotten past the birthday pictures now, and was looking at what seemed like a beach day for the family. Among them were pictures of Rick and Angel playing in the water, the two waiting for ice cream as it was ordered, and even another family photo at the bottom left corner.

"Rick… if you're not gonna eat. Then could you at least take these?" I asked, holding the pills out. Rick slowly turned to his right and looked in my hand. He accepted the pills, grabbing them with his left hand and then popping them in his mouth. He swallowed without even taking a sip of anything. I reached out and began scratching his ear which made him close the album and lean over to lean on me. I embraced him in a soft hug and kept rubbing behind his ear. He began sobbing again as I rubbed, making me feel bad all over again. "It has to be hard I know… I really wish I could take this away from you…" I said softly.

"I… I just… I d-don't understand… Why her? Why my f-family… haven't we been through e-enough?" Rick sobbed. I continued to rub his ear and then moved to his back, giving it quick brushes as if to say there, there. "Why couldn't it have been me?... why couldn't I die instead of them? They… they are so much more worthy than me" Rick sobbed. I hugged him tightly now, cuddling the top of his head as I couldn't bear the thought of losing him.

"Losing you, wouldn't have solved anything" I said.

"But… but Angel would be alive… my p-parents would b-be alive" he said. I didn't reply. I wanted to say then others would miss you, but that didn't seem right. "I should have been there, '' Rick added. I lifted my head up and looked down at him, watching as he simply looked straight forward.

"What?" I asked.

"I should have gone and got her. Then she wouldn't have been in that Goddamn accident… no I was busy… I was busy fucking… like a piece of shit" Rick cried. I rubbed him again.

"Don't blame yourself like that. We don't even have all the details yet of the accident" I explained. Rick shook his head as best as he could as he still rested on me.

"I should have went and got her… not them… why would my dad drive a broken car?" Rick asked. I Had been thinking about that. Was the car broken? I remember thinking this at the scene of the accident, they were not the type of people to do that, and even if they did they wouldn't have Angel with them… my phone vibrated, it must have been mom. I reached for it and looked and sure enough, it was.

"Hey Rick… want to lay down on the couch for a bit?" I asked. Rick sniffed and got off of me, turning around to crawl onto the couch. He took the right side of the L shaped couch and rested his head on the couch pillow on the corner. I brushed my hand through his hair and against his ear. "How much did you drink?" I asked. Rick didn't reply. Instead another tear ran down his cheek. I sighed and gave his cheek a kiss, I then stood up and sat on the ottoman to look at the text.

M. Hey, is everything okay over there?

K. no, when I got here Rick had gotten into his parents liquor cabinet. He thinks that drinking is gonna ease him.

M. oh no. did you stop him?

K. he's not drinking anymore. I feel so bad mom. He won't eat anything either.

M. he isnt going to eat on his own. You have to give him food and try to tempt him. Make something and put it in front of him.

K. well he's resting right now, I don't want to just throw food in front of him.

M. What about you? Are you okay?

K. no, it hurts. It hurts so much and this house is just filled with memories.

M. I told you that you should come here. For God's sake Kate, get out of that house. Great Rick and bring him here.

K. I don't think it will change anything. How's Lilly?

M. not good. Shaky just left a little while ago and Humphrey took her upstairs to try and calm her down.

K. was Shaky alright?

M. no, I tried to offer him something to eat but he didn't want it. I think he just went home to grieve.

K. yeah. Probably. What about you mom, are you okay?

M. we didn't hang around much anymore but I still cared for them. We've been best friends since high school. It definitely hurts but I don't want you to worry about me. Worry about yourself and Rick. I'll have to talk with Humphrey about his mother as well.

K. alright.

M. So what are you gonna do?

K. what I can, but right now Rick is resting so I'm probably just gonna lay with him for a bit. He shouldnt be left alone right now, I was stupid to do it earlier.

M. well you had things to do, and you went back as soon as you could. You're doing your best Kate. I wanted to tell you again that I'm so proud of you.

K. I'm not doing much, but I should go. I don't want to be on my phone too long.

M. alright. Stay strong. I love you.

K. love you too mom. Bye.

M. bye.

I closed my phone and put it back in my pocket and then turned around. Rick was still laying down, looking down on the couch cushions as tears stained his face. I scooted off the ottoman and got on my knees to rest my head on my arms which now lay on the cushions, coming eye to eye with Rick.

"Are you sure you don't want to try and eat something?" I asked. A few seconds of no response followed until Rick gave a slight and upset nod. I brushed my hand through his hair again, making him close his eyes and sniff. He was still crying even after all this time, the only difference now was that he was doing it so silently. It was still a heartbreaking sight but nothing compared to earlier. The way he screamed for his dead sister made me feel awful. Almost to the point where I was about to cry myself. But now he just laid here defeated, tears running down his cheeks as memories flowed.

"Do you… do you want me to take you away from here?" I asked, only now just thinking of asking him if he even wanted to be here. Before I was afraid to ask. I don't even know why, but now he seemed calmed down enough to ask him. In the end though it didn't matter. Rick shook his head no and then continued to stare past me. I sighed and then remembered that there was a blanket to my left that hung on the couch. Maybe he should take a nap or something and I could cook or order food.

"Do you want a blanket?" I asked. Another few seconds of silence and then Rick spoke.

"I… I just want my family back" he said extremely quietly. I looked at him saddened until my phone began ringing, startling me. I lifted my head and took it out of my pocket to see that it was Humphrey calling.

"I'll be right back" I said, placing my hand over Rick's for a second before standing up and walking into the dining room. I answered the phone call and put it to my ear. "Hello?" I said.

"Hey, how's Rick doing?" Humphrey asked.

"Not good," I sighed. "What about you and Lilly? How are you two?"

"She's sleeping right now, Shaky left a little while ago. I tried to talk him out of leaving but he just wanted to be alone. He still seemed upset, just more calm about it I guess" Humphrey explained.

"Yeah, my mom told me that he probably went home to grieve. I hope he doesnt try anything stupid" I said.

"Like what? You think he'll hurt himself?" Humphrey asked. I shrugged.

"I don't know, I really hope not. We already lost too much, '' I said. I heard Humphrey saigh on the other end.

"What about you Kate? Are you alright?" Humphrey asked.

"No… this is my first time losing someone. And someone so close at that… I'm really gonna miss her" I cracked, wiping a tear from my eye.

"I know, we're all gonna miss her. I keep thinking about how it happened. I hope it was quick" Humphrey said.

"Me too" I replied, although having seen the accident, I don't think it was as quick as we were hoping.

"I just… I haven't had time to grieve myself yet" Humphrey broke, from the sounds of it beginning to tear up.

"Yeah… I know what you mean. Don't hold it in Humphrey. If you need to talk with someone then my mother's there. Or even I'll stay on the phone for a bit. Just don't hold it in" I told him. I heard Humphrey sniff as he still tried to hold himself together.

"Thanks for the offer, but there's another reason I called," Humphrey said.

"What is it?" I asked.

"It's… it's the school. The accident was on the news and the school was notified. I don't know if you got the message but they sent a message that they're gonna have something for Angel. Some Of the students as well have apparently been leaving stuff by her locker. I don't know if you wanted to bring a picture or something to place but… I think it would help" Humphrey explained. I turned around and looked down at the living room floor as I stared through the dining room door frame. The photo albums were still there.

"Yeah… I think I can do that. Are uh… are you gonna go?" I asked.

"Well they thought about having a candle lighting but they wanted Rick's permission. Do you think he would-"

"No… no I think the funeral is already too much for him" I said. Humphrey sniffed again.

"Oh God… any news on that?" he asked.

"No, nothing yet," I answered. Humphrey sighed before continuing.

"Look, I guess I'll go tomorrow morning to drop something off, the others though-"

"Yeah, I… I don't think the others would want to go, it might be too much for them. I'll ask Rick though and see if he wants to just in case… does Shaky know?" I asked.

"I don't know, he's my next call. Are you two gonna be okay over there?" Humphrey asked. I took another moment to look around the dining room. It was so dark and silent. It felt so… wrong.

"We… we have to be… I'll see you tomorrow morning okay?" I said.

"Sounds good. See ya Kate" Humphrey said sadly.

"Bye" I replied before hanging up. I turned around to the lying room again, this time actually walking through the door frame and back over to Rick, who was still just laying there, staring at the couch cushions. I knelt down again and got to eye level with him.

"Oh Rick… I'm so sorry this happened to you" I said. Rick didn't reply. Instead another tear just silently ran down his cheek. "Tomorrow, Humphrey and I are going to the school, everybody heard. They want to hold a candle lighting for her. Is that alright?" I asked. Rick nodded slowly. "Okay, want to help me pick something for her locker? Apparently people are leaving things by it to pay their respects" I explained.

"What is it that we could possibly leave?" Rick asked. His voice sounded sore and worn out as he spoke. It made me feel bad all over again.

"How about a picture?" I suggested. Rick's eyes finally moved from the previous spot and moved over to the photo albums on the floor. He then slowly got up and crawled over to them where we once again took the position of leaning against the ottoman as we flipped through the albums. This time though we actually flipped through them, well Rick did anyway. It didn't take long until he found a photo of himself and her with an arm around each other as they looked at the camera. From the looks of it they were at the beach on a gazebo. They were wearing normal clothes but the background behind them was simply just a tad bit different. On the bottom left of the picture read "happy 14th" and was written in marker. Rick sniffed as he held the photo.

"This… this was a fun day. We took her to the boardwalk and had dinner there, and then we… we walked a bit, visited shops… spoiled her…" Rick said, beginning to sob again. I kept my eyes on the picture as the little bit of happiness in the room radiated from it. I could feel the emotions that went on as it was taken. "It's still her birthday you know… today was supposed to be fun… we were gonna spend her first birthday together with all of us… and she just… she isn't here" Rick sobbed. I pulled him into another hug, wrapping my arm around him and pulling him close asI kept my eye on the picture.

"You picked a beautiful one Rick… Angel would love it" I said.