19

"Tad?"

Ianto was in his office, one of his favorite hiding places these days and he looked up from the receipts he was sorting from Jack's shoe box of crap he emptied his pockets into each night, sitting back and removing the glasses from the end of his nose. "Yes love?"

Sam entered and took a seat, trying to work out what to say as all the things she had thought to say while walking across were suddenly gone. God. She sighed "I am sorry I was so rude to you. I didn't' mean it and I am grateful for all you do. You and Dad made me welcome in the family, have always been loving and kind, I do not know why I am lashing out. I … I think maybe it's the closeness. We used to go to Cardiff and London and spend nights at the other houses, we used to have separate lives with once or twice a week meals here but since the lockdown we are all in each other's pockets and I think I am feeling a little smothered."

"I am smothering you?" he asked gently.

"No. Not you… the village. It's not coming out right. I feel like there is no separation anymore. I think I need more alone time to process things and maybe feel more in control of my life. That's it. It's the fires, the pandemic and now the baby. I feel like I have lost control of things and I need to stop the word spinning so fast."

"I think we need more normalcy. Maybe we need to start that. You are right, things are tight. Close and squishing in. We need to relax, breathe and remember that we are allowed off days" Ianto smiled as he rose and she did too, hoping for a hug to show no hard feelings but to her disappointment he did not offer one.

He was still hurt but was processing it for now. She could only give him time and hope that he would do what he always had in the past when something was wrong. He would fix it.

She passed Ton on the way out of the house and he smiled as he offered her some cupcakes to take home. His anger gone, as it always is with him. Ton liked the get it out, like a poison in his heart. Once spoken out loud, expelled, it was gone.

"Thank you brother Ton" she said as she accepted a plate of them.

"No worries. You go home now, the rain is coming and you pretty hair will frizz." Ton waved a hand towards the back door and she walked home in the soft drizzle feeling her hair frizz around her head.

She knew she had to shake off this funk.