Secret Servals
Alex had worked hard to get this interview. He was good at zookeeping. The qualifications listed on his resume were entirely real and not doctored by MI6. In fact, he hadn't seen or heard from any of them in years. They had left him a number to call "if he needed anything." Yeah, no thanks. Alex didn't want their help.
"Mr. Rider?"
Alex let out a slightly nervous breath. He would do fine. This would go well. Probably just some rich nut who liked animals but did not clean up after, feed, or entertain them. "Yes."
The man looked almost as nervous as he felt. Wait a minute. Why would he be nervous?
"Well. Your, um, qualifications seem in order. I'm afraid our last keeper died suddenly. Do you have any issues working with, ah, carnivores?"
Alex raised an eyebrow at the guy. He had put tigers on his resume for a reason. Mostly because he loved the large fluffy fuckers. "Not at all. If you look at my extension courses, you'll notice that they're my specialty. If the conditions are unethical, I might insist on a larger enclosure, though."
The man looked slightly faint as he moved down the list of questions. Alex waited. Was his boss that much of a terror? Or was he just the nervous sort?
"Will relocation be an issue?"
Alex looked at him. The man coughed awkwardly. "No, as long as you pay for relocation costs."
The man looked slightly less like he was about to pass out from stress. Alex was starting to wonder if he should offer a break? Then again, he wasn't the interviewer.
"Non-disclosure agreements?"
Alex rolled his eyes. Paranoid motherfuckers. Billionaires were goddamn lunatics. "Within reason."
There were several more pages turned. Alex was a little bit suspicious but this seemed like the fun kind of job that his buddies always mentioned. And by fun, he meant the animals, not the clients.
"How soon are you willing to sign?"
Alex frowned. What was the right answer to that sort of thing? Too soon and you sounded desperate. Too long and they'd think you didn't want the job. "Give me a few days to read over the contracts."
The man nodded vigorously. Alex was afraid that he was going to faint from relief now.
"Given that you're the only applicant in two weeks, you'll have the contracts by tonight."
Alex couldn't help but wonder what he'd gotten himself into. Maybe there was a reason he was the only one who had applied? He wasn't exactly a great judge of which jobs were dodgy.
The flight to the middle of nowhere, Africa had been a mildly eerie experience. Alex's new employer hadn't wanted to waste a single second after he signed the contract. His arms were throbbing slightly from all the new vaccines he'd just received. They had printed him pages to add to his medical records once they landed and he had the internet. The animals were already on site. Alex was left with the somewhat awkward option of socializing with the very grumpy-looking security or reading his books. They were trying to socialize a group of cats into having a large hunting group. Like lions. Except not lions. Alex was shaken awake by one of the security guards.
"We landed."
Alex rubbed his eyes and sighed. The light blasted as the door to the cargo plane opened. Was this even legal? Alex was just not going to check. He was immediately greeted by high-pitched meows.
"Mew. Mew. Mew."
Alex walked up to the fence and saw a large number of baby servals. The huge ears and tiny round eyes were fucking adorable. "Oh."
One of them pawed playfully at his shoelaces through the fence. Alex reached down and gently extracted the claws from his shoes.
"Mew. Mew. Mew."
There was a throat cleared behind him. Rude. "There will be plenty of time for that once you meet the boss and your new coworkers."
Alex resisted the urge to sigh and allowed himself to be led away from the precious baby fluffs. Where were their parents? Separate enclosure? Dead? He supposed that they could probably tell him later.
"Welcome to my humble abode!"
The man gestured wildly at the scenery around Alex. He had a giant pool. And a giant house. With an army of guards. Should he call MI6? Nah. This was probably fine. "Thank you."
The billionaire, John Pinkerton, didn't seem to mind his general awkwardness around people. He plowed on as though he hadn't heard Alex's dubious tone.
"We've got a great project going on! You've met the kittens, right?"
Alex nodded along. Pinkerton seemed genuinely concerned with the welfare of the cats.
"They were all orphaned in a terrible round of wetland draining, I'm afraid."
Alex winced slightly. Pinkerton carried on.
"Terrible that, but we've been feeding them the finest food. Anyways, I'm sure you're eager to meet our behavioral expert Dr. Schmidt. You'll be working with him, mostly."
Alex was led to the laboratory as a conclusion of the tour. Inside were clean white walls and a rather stern-looking man.
"This is Alex Rider, the new zookeeper we hired, Dr. Schmidt."
The man jumped slightly. Alex watched as the man stood up.
"Dr. Schmidt. It is good to meet you after the unfortunate death of the last one."
Alex shook his hand. Pinkerton beamed at him.
"I'll leave you both to it."
Yep, he was working for a super villain. Alex honestly couldn't be fucked to call MI6, though. It was such a pain in the ass and they didn't believe him the last time.
"I'm sure you're very competent, Alex. You can call me Elias."
Alex shrugged. Elias seemed pretty chill. "You can call me Alex. What, er, did happen to the last guy?"
Elias sighed. Alex thought he sounded mildly put upon.
"Fell off the balcony while drunk."
Yeah, that sounded so legitimate. Not. "Alright, then. What do you need from me, besides feedings and environmental cleaning? I assume you have a very specific plan for enrichment."
Elias nodded. Alex leaned against the desk.
"The diet, cleaning schedule, and playtime instructions will be finished by tomorrow morning."
Alex nodded. Elias finished printing the sheets.
"Until then, feeding them and cleaning their enclosures should be fine for today."
Alex glanced around. Elias gently pointed behind him.
"Cleaning supplies are behind you. The formula and instructions are in the lockers."
Alex ran a hand through his hair. Time to get to it. This was going to be a long day if they hadn't cleaned the enclosure since the other guy died. Thankfully, nobody had been too odious to him at the moment.
Based on a prompt by Zyzyax (see story summary). This is the 163rd work in the Winds of Change 2022 Alex Rider Prompt event, where a new prompt (plus a short 1-3K work) is posted every day. For more details, see the AO3 collection. We have an index of all the prompts used in this event so far and going forwards - join the discord to get access to the online index (and to take part in our events, chat about everything and anything, and meet a load of awesome people!
