Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel or anything else you may recognize
So finally got an idea for my 300th fic…..again! Originally I had a 300th fic where Frieza from DBZ kills various villains from other fandoms, but then I deleted some of my fics which I consider no longer relevant and they reflect who I was before rather than who I'm now.
So I didn't have 300 anymore, until now.
Have fun.
J. Jonah Jameson had no idea what had happened. One moment, he had seen that Spider-Man was Peter Parker during his fight with Scorpion when the menace (or not) had come to save him from the villain, due to him being the hostage. Peter's mask had come off during that fight.
Then next moment some debris was about to fall on him while Peter was down, only for him to end up somewhere else completely.
It was New York! But it was not his New York, he knew that. It just looked so futuristic compared to his own, plus finding some newspapers and all that, he'd found out some superhero team called the Avengers existed too apparently.
"Did Spider-Man do some magic and play a trick on me?" He wondered, then sighed. "So its Parker, huh?"
And later he'd found out that the identity of Spider-Man as Peter Parker had been exposed, only, Peter Parker was some young barely adult high-schooler, about to get into college.
And the one who'd done the exposing was…..himself!
But without hair! Oh, if his barber ever did that to him, he'd never trust that guy again.
Though what had really infuriated him was that instead of being one of the best-selling newspapers was all time, the Daily Bugle was now some controversial website with conspiracy theories, and no one cared about the source of the news, including himself.
Only one thing pissed him off even more than that- the lack of honor that bald him showed! This Peter Parker was a high-schooler, the bald Jameson had ruined his life.
Plus if the murder video of this Quentin Beck guy was proven to be fake in a court of law, then the bald Jameson was a complete piece of mega-crap!
He'd drop that as evidence against Spider-Man/Peter if it was proven to be false, because he always liked his sources proper, true and credible.
Then came something that tipped him over the edge. It was a rainy night when Jameson saw bald him on the public TV-
"Tragedy. What else can I call it? What more need be said? The damage, the destruction, you saw it with your own eyes. When will people wake up and realize that everywhere Spider-Man goes, chaos and calamity ensue. Everything Spider-Man touches comes to ruin. And we, the innocents, are left to pick up the pieces. J. Jonah Jameson reporting. Good night... and God help us all."
That did it! The kid's aunt was murdered! Apparently she was still a beauty in this world in spite of reaching middle-age, unlike the old one his had, and he'd met her once.
She'd terrified him.
So, without a second thought, Jameson headed to the DailyBugle . net's office, bursting in, the security too shocked to even stop him.
He pushed open the door of bald Jameson's office, making the man jump up in fright as he saw a mirror image of himself. Only, with hair.
"What is going on?" Bald Jameson asked in shock. "Who the hell are you? Did that Parker magically make a clone of me with hair to mock me?"
"You are an honorless scumbag!" Jameson snapped, slamming his fist on the table, glaring at bald Jameson. "How dare you ruin a high-schooler's life?"
"He is Spider-Man! He is a menace to us all!" Bald Jameson retorted angrily.
"Yes, Spider-Man is a menace!" Jameson agreed on that. "But the video was fake, so you using that in spite of it being proven false proves you're nothing like me. I'm the real Jameson, you're just a pretender."
"Oh really? The real me would never defend Spider-Man! So you're the pretender."
"I'm not defending the menace you moron, I'm defending the sanctity of the media!" Jameson yelled at bald Jameson, everyone else in the building now witnessing the screaming match between both Jamesons in shock, awe and amusement, wondering how there were two of them yet also amused by the yelling at each other they were doing.
"Don't tell me you wouldn't go after the wall crawling menace if you had anything to implicate him on your hands."
"Not if it was fake. A photographer of mine once gave me a photo of Spider-Man committing crime but it was a fake. I made him pack his things and get out of my building, and even printed a goddamn retraction! Which was embarrassing!"
"You lack all spine, you know that?" Bald Jameson shook his head.
"And you lack hair!"
"Hey!"
"And honor!" Jameson added. "His aunt just died, and you are still too busy using all of your resources to attack him. At least in a time like this I would keep away from the masked villain, because for all the trouble he causes, he is still human."
Bald Jameson tried to make a retort, but Jameson had left him no room to defend himself at this point.
Finally, he said. "She died because of him, everything he touches is ruined."
"That is true, but scumbag media people like you who go around using resources to attack everyone they can instead of trying to actually report, you ruin the whole world", Jameson sneered, pointing at bald Jameson. "And seeing a bald me who does that, it is sickening to me!"
Before bald Jameson could retort, Jameson faded away, and bald Jameson even forgot what was going on, as did the rest of them.
Jameson returned to his world, having survived what was supposed to be his end due to his adventure in the Multiverse, and in spite of knowing Spider-Man's identity, never revealed it, and didn't even let Parker know he knew.
Of course it didn't stop him from doing libel and calling Spider-Man a menace to society, but that's nothing new.
Raimiverse Jameson is like the one from the older comics, biased as hell but deep down a decent guy.
While MCU Jameson is a perfect representation of modern media, using every resource he can to attack someone he doesn't like.
Anyway, hope all enjoyed and see you all next time with some other update.
