Lin laid on Katara's lap. She decided to talk to her after years of guilt. She lied to them both, and she feared her mom's response if she told her the truth. Lin already disappointed her not being strong like she was. She just wanted her friend at that point, even though Katara said she couldn't. Lin didn't realize how bad her face and body were, that she was lucky. Katara was the best healer in the world.

"Lin, what's wrong, dear? She gently strokes her unscarred cheek

"I'm sorry, I'm just. Upset. I don't even know where to begin" Lin admits she wanted to avoid it, but she had too many people saying she needed help.

"I know it's been hard on you, Toph had no right to throw that stuff in your face, and I heard Su also was starting with you again." Katara huffed. She was with Zuko on this one. She couldn't understand the big issue Toph had with her kid.

"It's not that. I know they're always going to treat me like that. Theirs is no hope. And I feel it's. Deserved." Lin paused. She felt her eyes sting, but she knew she had to talk; everyone kept saying to get help, and Lin didn't know where to find it. If it had been anyone else, she would have an idea of where to start, but she couldn't find it in herself to care or ask for herself.

"I just feel miserable after talking to Tenzin today, and everyone feels like I can't do anything anymore." Lin started. It was safe. It was true. She didn't like everyone treating her like glass, seeing through her and the many layers of masks, pressure, and heat she molded together to cover that darkness she couldn't bear to see.

"Why do you feel you deserve to be treated like that by your family," Katara asked softly. She could feel Lins's heart. She knew her. She was scared, and she wouldn't let her face be anything but hard.

"Because I'm just not good. I'm a hypocrite and a liar." Lin said she was trying to control her voice. It was so hoarse. She was purging every day now. She couldn't escape the meals.

"When have you ever lied, Lin? You are not a bad person. You would give your life for anyone in need. You saved my family more times than I can keep count. You're a hero." Katara didn't understand, but she attempted to remind her how much good she does.

"Because it's not a life, theirs are just more important. I told Tenzin a truth I had never faced. I want to die." Lin felt it again. The words, they were all coming back out mindlessly. "That day, Kya saved me from overdosing because my mom thought it was a great idea for an untrained child to do her job and make her case. then she covered it up, wish the best healer didn't train her,and I did lie." Lin addmited.

Kataras lips thinned that one hurt, she never wanted any of the children to feel that way ever. Only sometimes did she understand, with Aang gone she hoped to join him soon but she had to much left in this plane of existence. She stroked Lins cheek again softly. They didn't realize that Toph and Su we're eavesdropping. Su shot her mother a look. Wondering what that was about, Lin doing her job underaged, was she telling the truth. She heard her sisters voice again.

" I lied when I said, I wasn't- they didn't.I was so scared to tell her." She sighed " I was raped, and I couldn't bend because the blood benders. When I kept crying for my mother, the guy that was dating her that took me let me know how little I mattered. She didn't know I was gone and hundreds of men were abusing and torturing me." Lin voice cracked and Lin aggressively nawed on her pinky subconsciously. "until you found Su almost starved to death. That she didn't even look for me. I wish you weren't the best healer in the world, some many things should have killed me."

"You survived Lin and now you help people everyday, I wish you told me, it's just been eating at you all this time. You need to take care of yourself to." Katara began secretly inspecting Lin. She couldn't believe Kya missed clear signs of disordered eating she didn't need her water to know why she had teeth scars on her knuckles and damaged vocal cords.

"I don't think I can do it anymore, I'm losing my mind. I can't remember anything anymore. I just find my self in random places with random people. I missed two weeks of my life, all my work was done but who knows what I did or said and it keeps getting worst." Katara knew Lin had been in tears but she could hear it in her voice to on top of the scrachines. Katara felt cold, she was concerned, that sounded really dangerous even if she was functioning and doing her job.

"How long Lin." Katara said softly she felt wet spots on her legs.

Lin started to try and speak but the gates where open, she was sobbing and no words coherently would come out. She shook hard with sobs.

"I don't need to live anymore, I can't " she eventually said Katara felt like such a failure to this woman she had to try and lead her to help.

" but theirs so much to live for Lin; please don't give up. Please realize how much you mean to so many people." She plead sincerely.

"I'm sorry, I just feel in the way," she whispers as she sobs, Toph no longer could stand their letting Lin embarrass herself by wallowing in self pity.

"You decided to tell now. Are you serious."Toph says Su couldn't hold her back.

That second Lin was up right and not a tear in her eye. She was just as cold and stoic as the first first time she stepped foot on to Zaofu.

It genuinely frightened Toph and Katara, Su was trying to stop Lin from fleeing, she couldn't however. Lin was gone again, Toph decides not to chase but prays she doesn't hurt herself.

"We need to talk Toph." It was Kataras turn for her voice to cut like daggers.

"I know, I need to talk to her you told me." Toph attempted nonchalance she was clearly disturbed by how quickly Lin shut off.

"She needs you to, you're the only one, you and Su. She's killing herself she said she couldn't tell you she was that afraid to disappoint you. She doesn't even think you cared to look when she went missing." Katara spat her words angrily, they all failed but Toph had the gull to act like she didn't care.

"I tried, I said I didn't know how to be a mother, I didn't want to restrict them at all" She said as if that solved the dilemma.

Su watched Katara get redder, her mom still wouldn't take responsibility she missed Katara's response.

"I had to keep my distance after because I never wanted my kids to be targeted because of me, I'm going to talk to Lin, I know a place she could get help, me and Sparky got help their together." Toph put her hands up in surrender, she was told old. She realizes she was responsible for Lin even thought she felt she gave her a good life and was fifty holding on forever was not something she felt she should be blamed for.

"Interesting you say that, just need you to step up. It's life and death." Katara crossed her arms, it wasn't lost on her it was almost like they weren't in their 80's

Su decides to leave, she couldn't take this new information, she understood now why Opal begged her to come if they read what decides to find her.

"your not going to be happy sugar queen, but your sons cheating on his wife." Toph said picking up on adult activity.

"What"

"I wish I didn't have to see all the stupid things my kids did, but he cheating. With Lin, he did kiss her earlier today."

"Oh what a mess these kids are in" Katara says exasperated.

"Your telling me, Kya sneaking around with the fire lord, been their not great. And those two it never ends."

"To think theirs so much danger happening, we don't know what will happen next and our children can't even figure out relationships."

Lin sighed while she covered her face she was back in the present, overhearing embarrassing stories about her youth. She was still high from the earlier events. She felt a weight on the couch. Lin had a feeling it was someone related to her.

" still feeling it, Lin?" Su was doing the softer, kinder act she did when she wanted not to be held accountable for her words and actions.

"Maybe, it will make you go away." Lin was cold

"No, I'm not leaving Lin. I uh. Well," Su tried to find her words. Lin groaned.

"Spit it out or go. I'm tired," Lin huffed

"I'm sorry for calling you names. I didn't know what happened to you," Su finally said

"You should be sorry you thought anything you said was okay. Do you think it's okay to say shit like that to people without? Issues." She lectures it was like childhood again.

"No, it's completely wrong, you. You were always so fair about stuff like that." Su sputtered, embarrassed.

"Most people don't choose to put themselves in messes—just a lot of horrible people out there." Lin ignored what Su said. She didn't understand how being a reasonable and decent human was hard to comprehend or praiseworthy.

"The names change, but the streets stay the same," an old voice says

"Ever stop to think why that is" an icy chasm emerged again

"Do you ever stop thinking and let things go. You can't save everyone." Toph retorted. Sometimes Toph thinks she spent too much time with Katara

"I can try. I will always try. It's better than doing nothing in a swamp." She felt anger speaking to her mother.

"Listen, Lin, I know I haven't been a good mother. I have to live with those choices every day. I'm sorry I put you in danger and was the worst mother ever. I don't want my mistakes to affect your options. I found a place that can help you. Su and I are going to do this right this time." Toph explained she tried to sound like Katara. It went as well as one would expect.

Lin was silent. She didn't know that this was a trap. She wishes her mother would say she loved her.

"You just can't go on like this, Lin. This conflict will get resolved, but you are sick, Lin, and you put this off too long." Toph said again, concern steeping in her voice.

"Can I think about it and get everything in order?" Lin was extremely hesitant.

"Just don't take long, and if anyone gives you a hard time, let me know." Her mother cracked her knuckles.

"Now, I want the story on this picture of you, Zolt, and Hiroshi," Su said, holding up the picture

Mhhm, nothing to tell. I was working at that seedy club thing." Su shot Toph a dirty look. Lin looked so young she could have ended up trafficked. " I think I was drunk, maybe high, it was Hiroshi's birthday, but I don't remember much else." She looked at the photo, how big her smile was. Hiroshi showed how good-natured he was and how he sacrificed himself for his daughter. "He helped me when I was on the streets on all the safe spots where creepy men wouldn't go if I couldn't find him because I wasn't allowed to bend, where to get decent food. I learned how it was. I appreciate it. I would have never taken a chance on Mako if I had never been exposed to reality. Zolt to, but he had his momma." She looked over at Zolt, remembering Hiroshi and how the three of them were pals at that time.

"You still remember her" Zolt asked

"Yep, how do you forget somebody that named their son after themselves." Lin teased him with affection.

"Shhhh, why you gotta be so mean," Zolt whined.

"It's the literal truth," Lin said flatly.

"Guys, I smell something burning," Asami said

"Here we go" Lin stood up, bending Zolt's metal table to her body. He let out a huff,

"Sorry, big man."

Zolt sighs

"I'll fix it," Lin promised him. He worked hard on his home.

They charge in for a fight, a suspicious one. With everyone's collaborative strength, they managed to capture the weakest person in the group, which seemed to be Saruk, and he gave them calculated and hateful looks at his capture. Lin looks over at Mako and gives him praise. They cuff him. They were always the best team, in complete sync.

" This man is Saruk, affiliated with the red lotus," Mako said as they stood him up.

Lin sighed "let's get him in a cell. We have to question him. I'll be back." She approaches Tarrlok

"A word" Lin started walking towards the balcony, it over looked dark, still waters. She inhaled the refreshing sent. The sky looked beautiful that night, peaceful. She wondered if their was a Lion turtle around.

Tarrlok follows her. He expected her to chew him out and call him a traitor, to throw accusations at her despite Mako, Korra, and Asami following his every move unless they needed to find out more about different organizations.

" you should help me get information out of him. You just have to act like you were captured too." Lin said he was surprised.

"What if he doesn't bite,"

"Then you help me scare the life out of him. It might work."

"It might, but he was more about revenge, didn't elaborate, didn't feel I was worth anything without my bending." He let out more sad than he intended

"You're more than your bending, you, you don't even realize." Lin sounded a bit hurt.

"Neither do you, Lin." He looked at her.

"I wanted to ask you something else before we get into the strategy," Lin said after a long silence.

"Anything, are you doing better, by the way? I saw you talking with your mother and sister. I hope they weren't treating you poorly again. It's hard not to respect your wishes." He relaxed from his tense stance.

"That's actually what I wanted to tell you. My mom thinks I should go to a hospital. Here, for a few weeks." She looked over for a reaction, a physical one. It was too hard to look at his face still.

Tarrlock smiled. It wasn't like his father's. He was hopeful

" I want you to do that. It would be great for you. After everything, I want you to be helped for a change." He admitted. Lin could hear his smile.

"So you think it's a good idea, I feel. Worried." They were both sharing the truth.

"It's natural. You know, I did that once." Lin looked over at him, slightly confused.

"A hospital situation?"

"Yeah, after my mother. It helped me. It gave me a reason to go on. Then I met somebody I love, and the rest was history."

"Who? "Lin joked

"Someone who made the sun come up on a lonely day. Someone I would have taken to meet my mother. Someone I consider changing my face for." He looked over at the waning moon sadly. It was like before. They loved looking at the sky together.

"Could you stop it? "Lin said softly

"I can, I'm sorry. I guess I'm happy you talked to me." He chuckled. He hoped it wasn't too strong.

"Why did we have to become our parents with self-awareness," Lin said

"I don't know, but I wish I had chosen a different path. I know I have no chance now." He looked wistful.

"I miss. You. I'll go; maybe I'll finally let go. I just want you to be okay too. You are only forty. You can start over." She took his hand as she looked at a star.

Tarrlok stays quiet. They both know. They knew the feeling. The despair. That feeling of both at that age and heartbroken. Tarrlok saw Lin pick up the pieces. But he didn't know if he could ever be as strong as her. She looked over at him as if she pulled his thoughts from his head

"You're stronger than you know. You survived too. Theirs a world out there, and we both have a space in it. Even if we aren't together."She rubbed his hand. It was peaceful.

They ended up discussing how they would go about Saruk. Lin pushed back her confusion. She just was planning to hang herself while hiding under a pillow. Now she's talking to her ex-lover about living. She chalks it down to wanting to change and the fact she and Tarrlok felt like parts of the same whole. She would never stop caring about him, just like she could never feel alone with Tenzin being a soul on this plane.


We are doing our best here. I am trying to maneuver around my weaknesses.