Alec inputs the code and pulls the door open, taking the stairs two at a time. His hand is raised to knock when the apartment door swings open on its own. He's not sure if Magnus sensed him coming and proactively used magic to open it, or it he'd set the wards to open for Alec whenever he came, either way it makes him smile. He pulls the door behind him, easing it closed it quietly as he can, taking a moment to glace around the always rearranging apartment. He stops just inside, his heart clenching in his chest at the sight in front of him.

Isabelle is sitting on the bay window sill, her feet on the coffee table, a book on forensics he'll never understand in her hand and Chairman Meow sleeping in her lap. Clary is sitting opposite Magnus, at Isabelle's feet, her hand is in Magnus' as he paints her nails a deep purple that matches Isabelle's toes, when her fingernails are all coated, Magnus hands her the bottle and she starts painting his nails. "Steady, steady" Isabelle teases and he doesn't catch all of Clary's reply but he thinks he hears the word 'artist' in her teasing voice.

Alec smiles fondly, watching the man he's growing to love, his sister, and the woman he's begrudgingly coming to think of as a sister, together in easy friendship. Magnus eyes slide to his and he smiles softly in acknowledgement and Alec gives a lop-sided smile in return. The girls haven't noticed him yet, and he just wants another moment. Magnus seems to understand, shifting his eyes back to watch Clary work.

Alec thinks he could convince the girls that he just happened to drop by if the box he was holding wasn't from Isabelle's favorite bakery. She'll never believe that was a coincidence. Magnus had texted him when Clary and Isabelle showed up saying they had just finished a mission nearby and needed a reason not to go back to the Institute right away. Alec had been training at the time and felt a wave of guilt wash over him. Jace's absence was affecting them all differently and that combined with the accusing looks other Shadow Hunters threw their way made it hard to be in the Institute and Alec feel like he failed to see how hard it was for them through his own pain.

Clary finishes Magnus last nail and with a swirl of blue magic all their nails are instantly dry. He watches Isabelle wiggle her toes dramatically before he pulls in a long breath "so, this is where everyone went" he says. putting the box of pastries on the coffee table. Magnus grins at him so he leans down to press a quick kiss to his lips before sitting on the ground at Magnus' feet, across from Clary.

Isabelle looks at the bakery box for a long moment. a quiet smile playing across her features, "Thanks, big brother." he smiles, reaching over to pinch her ankle softly.

After a beat he taps a knuckle against the table by Clary's hand softly, "You okay?" he asks quietly. She shrugs one shoulder and he wishes he knew what to say, to Clary, to anyone. He feels a flare of jealously when Magnus leans forward and squeezes Clary's hand softly and she smiles, but it is quickly replaced by gratefulness. He's never been good at emotions, at comforting people, but Magnus is - they can balance each other out. He leans his weight back against Magnus legs and smiles when he feels Magnus' hand run through his hair, adjusting so that Alec can settle in the space between his legs.

He clears his throat and pulls the top off the bakery box, "I... uh... I didn't know what you guys," he gestures to Clary and Magnus "would want so I got ... too much" he gives a self-depreciating chuckle as Isabelle give him a soft, knowing, smile. Isabelle starts to lean forward but Chairman gives an unhappy meow at the possibility of being displaced and Isabelle settles back in her seat with an amused huff. Alec leans forward to pick one of her favorites, a double chocolate donut, out of the box and hand it to her. She grins and takes a huge bite.

"Thanks, Alec " Clary says as he settles back against Magnus legs, her voice quiet in a way that doesn't suit her.

"Yes," Magnus leans forward and waves his hands, drinks appearing on the table in front of them, he presses a quick kiss to Alec's deflect rune "very thoughtful, Alexander" he mummers, taking a sprinkled donut and leaning back in his char.

After a moment of quiet clary scratches the side of her nose and tilts her head a little, "Sorry, I know we should have told some one before we stayed out, with everything going on... " she trails off and gives an aborted sigh "or just gone back I guess"

It takes a beat too long for the realization that she thinks he is there to scold them to wash over him and Magnus is already learning forward "Biscuit, no." while Alec is opening and closing his mouth trying to think of what to say while his stomach sinks and he feels badly about how hard he's been on her. Now that he has sorted out his emotions and can see his feelings for Jace for the confusion they were, he feels silly for his jealously of Clary.

As easy as it would be to let Magnus fix this for him, he knows he can't so he clears his throat and looks at his own hands on the coffee table, "No. get it," he glances up at Isabelle and she nods a little, her silent reassurance, "how hard it can be to be there sometimes…how suffocating" he swallows, glances at Clary who is watching him carefully, he feels like he is revealing a secret when he adds "this is where I escape to, too" but everyone laughs a little, with him instead of at him, so he leans back against Magnus' legs with a smile

Clary shifts a little "Thanks, Alec" she says, still quiet but less defensive, and picks up a donut, tilting it towards him in acknowledgement before taking a bite. It's quiet for a long moment, the sound of chewing filling the apartment. The silence isn't as awkward of as it could be, but it isn't quite confrontable either.

Clary sniffles a little and then in one long breath says, "Do you think he wanted this, like do you think he's happy? " Like she had to gather her courage and then force out the words. She doesn't say his name but no one asks her who she's talking about.

"He did it to protect us." Alec says, the party line. But it rings, not quite false, but incomplete, even in his own ears and he can see the way Clary deflates, like she's as sick of hearing that as he is of saying it.

"I think" Isabelle closes the book she's holding and sets it down. "I think Jace has been looking for purpose and connection and family for most of his life." She glances over at Alec who is holding his hand across his stomach and over his Parabati rune absentmindedly. "I think we tried really hard to give him those things," she smiles sally, "but I think the temptation was too strong" it falls quiet again as Clary glances between the Lightwood siblings and Magnus combs his fingers through Alec's hair. "But, no, I don't think he's happy. We're his family, he'll be back."

Clary snorts at the unintentional reminder of her true relation to Jace and it sends the whole room into a fit of laughter and giggles. Chairman jumps off Isabelle's lap and goes to look for a quieter room, and that just sends them all into a new round of giggles.

After they've settled, Isabelle smacking a dramatic kiss to the top of Clary's head with a teasing 'sorry, sis' and Clary elbowing her shin, Clary nods towards Alec's hand "Can you feel him?"

Alec glances down at his hand, not having realized it was still on his abdomen, pressing on the rune that connects him to Jace. He drops his hand on the coffee table. "Sort of." He shrugs one shoulder and furrows his eyebrows, trying to think of a way to describe it. " I know that he's alive, and sometimes I'll get a random flood of emotions, but mostly I think he's blocking it." He glances around a little. "I didn't even know you could do that" he decides to add, honestly.

Clary reaches over and squeezes his forearm softly before pulling her hand back to herself. It's probably the first voluntary physical contact they've had and he smiles at her and feels relieved when she smiles back. He flinches when Isabelle throws the last bite of her donut at him, it bounces off his chin and lands on his chest. He rolls his eyes as everyone else laughs and he smiles and throws it back at her laughing when she catches it in her mouth.

in the end, the four of them crowd in to Magnus' living room - Alec and Magnus leaning against each other on the sofa. Clary half-laying on the loveseat, and label folded into the huge arm chair. It doesn't solve anything, all of their problems are going to be waiting for them in the morning, but somehow Alec thinks it's all going to be a little easier to handle after this.


This is my first Shadowhunter's fic. Hope you enjoyed! Please like/comment :-)