Betty awoke to see the sun shining against an unfamiliar window pane. Slowly stretching out her body and opening her eyes fully, she recognized herself as being in Kevin's guest room. She looked over to the night table next to the bed and nearly gasped when she saw the clock situated on it revealing it was almost noon. Had she really slept close to14 hours straight? After their talk the night before, she and Kevin had heated up some pasta and tomato sauce and watched silly reality TV. Betty started getting tired around 9:30 and Kevin had set up the guest bedroom for her as she showered and brushed her teeth. She could see the pile of clothes he'd offered her as pajamas still lying on the edge of the guest bed. After he'd left, she'd pathetically snuck back into the bathroom and tried to wash the dried bloodstains off of Jughead's t-shirt with a little bit of soap without the shirt losing its scent. She'd slept in it and it soothed her to once again feel his musk on her skin even though she knew things were so unresolved and strained between them. She looked down and inhaled, hugging her arms around herself for several seconds. When she felt a momentary calm, she grabbed her phone from the night table and examined it.
She saw Kevin's message in their group text with Archie and Veronica from the night before with an SOS summoning everyone to Pop's at 3:30 right after school. Veronica and Archie had both confirmed that they would be there, with Veronica also asking that morning where Betty was. She wrote back that she hadn't felt so well earlier, but was feeling better now and would see them that afternoon. Kevin had also written several messages to her privately.
Kevin: Hey sleeping beauty. I hope you got some rest. I'll pick you up after school, so you don't have to worry about getting to Pop's alone. Make yourself at home!
Kevin: Also, I think there are also some clothes of yours you left from our last sleepover if you don't want to wear the same thing as yesterday. I'll see you later. ?ᅡᅠ
Kevin: And….I didn't know if I should tell you, but J cornered me after history class to ask about you. I told him I thought you'd want to hear from him, but he clammed up and walked away. ?
Betty smiled reading the first few messages, but didn't know how to feel about the third. She experienced a flurry of warmth in her stomach knowing he'd been worried about her, and had cared enough to ask Kevin about her, but she also understood it was just Jughead being a good, considerate person. If he'd wanted to talk to her, he would have written. But he didn't. The warmth quickly gave way to a pit in her stomach.
Trying to push aside the sadness the message had stirred in her, Betty set about getting dressed. She found the change of clothes Kevin had mentioned in one of his dresser drawers and pulled on the jeans and sweater combo, carefully folding Jughead's t-shirt away into her backpack. She found it ironic the gray sweater was covered in bubbly pink hearts, when she felt her own heart was hanging on for life support. To clear her mind, she sat and watched mindless television for three straight hours. She was so focused on distracting herself that she didn't eat or drink anything but water, so by the time Kevin came through the door to pick her up, she was thoroughly starving on top of being anxious. Kevin told her about what she'd missed in her classes on the ride over, avoiding any mention of either Jughead or Jason, and she was grateful to him for the diversion. When they entered Pop's, Archie and Veronica were already there, and waved them over happily. After ordering a round of milkshakes plus a bowl of vegetable soup for Betty (she didn't trust her stomach to try anything else), Veronica took the reins in asking what was going on.
"So, Bettykins, Kevin said you had something you needed to talk to us about?" the brunette said, looking at Betty carefully, Archie's arm slung lazily around her shoulder in the booth.
Betty nodded and took a breath. She wasn't really sure where or how to start. Kevin squeezed her knee under the table and gave her a reassuring gaze. She gave a small smile back and turned to face Archie and Veronica. "I know this will probably come as a surprise, and I'm sorry I've been hiding it from you both for so long, but I…well I haven't been happy for awhile now. And it mostly has to do with Jason."
Archie furrowed his brow, while Veronica scrunched her eyes together, both now totally fixed on what Betty was saying. "He's…abusive…verbally," she said, letting the words out slowly. "It didn't start right away but over the last year, he's gotten worse. He criticizes me all the time when we're alone, tries to control my behavior, how I dress, what I say. I tried to end it several times last year, but he just shot me down. Said he wouldn't allow it. And I just…stopped fighting him. It was like I went into autopilot and have been coasting in this haze ever since."
"Oh my God, B," Veronica said, grabbing her hand over the table. "Why didn't you tell us?"
Betty looked down at the table. "I was ashamed. I'm supposed to have this perfect life, with this great popular boyfriend. But it's all just a lie. He told me over and over again people only liked me for that lie, and I believed him. I didn't think anyone would want to see the real me or hear about my problems. I didn't think they'd want that burden."
"He's wrong," Kevin assured her. "We do want to see you. We love you."
"How could you think that, B, when you've always been there for all of us?" Veronica asked sadly. "When I moved here and my dad was in jail, when Archie's parents were getting a divorce."
"When I was afraid of coming out freshman year," Kevin chimed in.
"Exactly," Veronica continued. "You spent hours checking in on us, listening to us vent. It's because you're an incredible friend, Betty. That's why we love you. He's a dick for making you think otherwise or that we don't want to know what's going on with you. Of course we do. Always."
Betty wiped away the few tears starting to collect in her eyes. "Thank you," she said, gratefully, starting to let herself believe what they were saying. Her friends' words of support reminded her of what Jughead had said just before he'd asked her to leave his trailer that horrible day. That she was amazing, but she had to believe it. He couldn't do it for her. It felt like a punch to the stomach remembering something from that awful morning, but it was also the first time she really began to internalize what he'd said. She'd never been the problem. It had always been Jason. And until she accepted that, she'd keep letting him put her down until there was nothing left.
"I have to ask," Veronica said gently, breaking her from her thoughts. "But why now? What's changed?"
Betty took another deep breath. Although part of her wanted to be completely honest with her friends, it was hard to change months, if not years, of practiced behavior. For so long, she had mentally forced herself to withhold the whole truth and to always pretend everything was fine. She hated herself for feeling compelled to still keep him a secret, but a big part of her also didn't really want to tell them about her relationship with Jughead. She still cared too much about what their response would be, was still too afraid they wouldn't understand or would judge her. She felt conscience-stricken and regretful for how she'd let herself take advantage of his feelings for her (even though reciprocated), as well as even for how she'd betrayed Jason, despite how he treated her. Her shame, coupled with the inner demons ripping into her and telling her that after seeing last night what a complete and pathetic mess she was, Jughead wouldn't want anything to do with her, prevented her from being completely candid. She decided to just tell a version of the truth of last night and the last few months, leaving Jughead's name and their full relationship out of it. It was the best she felt she could do at the moment.
"After the newspaper meeting last night, Jason came by," Betty relayed softly. "He yelled at me, threatened me for getting annoyed at him in the cafeteria yesterday. He said a bunch of horrible things, called me names. And then he…he threw a mug at my head."
Veronica gasped. "Are you okay? Did he hurt you?"
"I'm physically fine. He left after that," she explained.
"Jesus, Betty," Archie finally spoke up, and she heard his fist collide against the red vinyl of the booth in anger. "I could kill him."
Veronica placed her hand soothingly on the redhead's shoulder. "Archiekins, it's okay. We're gonna fix this. Without violence." She turned back to look at Betty. "B, what do you want to do now? What do you need from us?"
"I think I want to end it. I think I'm finally ready." She looked over at Kevin, giving him a look not to reveal any more than she did. He nodded imperceptibly and she continued. "I started feeling things for someone else too. It doesn't matter who," she added definitively, silencing Veronica before she could interrupt her for details. "It was a reaction to the bad situation I was in and nothing's going to come of it. But it made me realize I can't do this with Jason anymore. I can't keep being dishonest and afraid. I've been so unhappy," she admitted, tears now falling freely down her face.
Veronica grabbed her hand again over the table. "It's okay, B. It's going to be okay."
"I'm going to be there when you break up with him," Archie declared and Betty could see the sadness and anger in his eyes at learning not only that the guy he so looked up to mistreated his girlfriend, but also that it was the very girl Archie had vowed since they were kids to protect. He was probably her oldest friend, and she knew that even if he wasn't the best at expressing his emotions, he loved her like a sister. Hearing how unaware he'd been of her suffering was probably killing him inside.
"Archie, she needs to do this for herself," Veronica said softly.
"I know and I won't do anything if he walks away," Archie explained. "But I'm not going to put her in a position where he could hurt her. I don't trust him."
Veronica nodded. "Where do you feel comfortable doing it, Betty?"
"Outside," she determined. "I don't want to be alone in a room with him."
"Reggie's having a party tonight. Doesn't he usually take you?" Kevin asked. "You could do it outside your house when he picks you up. You'll be next door, Archie."
"That's a good plan," Veronica said.
"Is that okay, Betty? Are you ready?" Kevin asked her.
She took a turn looking at all of them, feeling a sense of calmness and care she hadn't felt for weeks, since when she was in a good place with Jughead. She was scared shitless, but this had all gone on long enough. She didn't want to pretend anymore. She didn't want to keep hurting herself. She needed to be stronger. "I'm ready," she said, quietly, but unfalteringly.
Betty stared at herself in her vanity mirror waiting. It was almost 9. She'd spent the rest of the afternoon with her friends at Pop's before telling them she wanted a few hours alone before the anticipated conversation. She felt ill at ease, but it wasn't really nerves about the actual breaking up part. After three weeks of a persistent dull ache over Jughead followed by Jason's horrifying actions last night, she was emotionally drained and ready to be done with him. She knew she couldn't take any more of his abuse and had to extricate herself from the soul-crushing situation. She wasn't even so concerned with his reaction, although maybe she was too frightened to fully let herself anticipate it. Still she knew Archie would demolish him if he tried to hurt her physically. It was the after that scared her most, though. What would happen when she showed up at school on Monday? For the first time in two years, she wouldn't be Jason Blossom's perfect cheerleader girlfriend and all that entailed. She would just be her, Betty Cooper, the flawed, pitiful mess she knew she was and which she worried the whole school would soon discover too. And then there was Jughead. She would be lying to herself if she said a part of her wasn't following through with this in hopes he'd change his mind and take her back. She knew she wanted him. All of him. Completely and totally. But she was still way too scared to act on it. After he'd run away the evening before, saying in not so many words he couldn't handle the chaos she'd created, she refused to get her hopes up, no matter how hard her heart was pounding at the thought of how he'd react to her breaking up with Jason, if he'd even want her back.
She pulled his Christmas gift out of the drawer she'd stashed it in for three weeks. It had hurt too much to wear it or even look at it in the days of gray that followed their endpoint. (She couldn't even call it a breakup.) But now, she hoped, it would calm her nerves and make her strong enough to stand up to whatever Jason might throw at her. Jughead had told her that first night to come to him each time she felt the urge to dig her nails into her skin. She didn't have him to call now if she lost control and wanted to hurt herself, but maybe the necklace he'd chosen for her would help. She pulled it over her head, the pen falling and settling into the valley between her breasts. She clasped the pendant in her hand. "You're okay," she whispered to herself, trying to channel Jughead's confidence and coolness, two of the traits that had drawn her to him in the first place.
Her phone pinged and she saw it was Jason telling her to come outside. She glanced at herself once more in the mirror, steeling herself, before grabbing her coat. She left it unbuttoned, keeping the pendant close in hand. She dialed Archie's number with the other.
"Hey," he answered, his voice thick.
"He's here. I'm going outside. Keeping the phone on so you can listen in."
"Okay, Ronnie and I are waiting by the door. We'll come out if he tries anything."
"Thanks," she said, before slipping the phone into her coat pocket.
She walked outside and could see Jason in the driver seat of his car. She knocked on the passenger side window and he made an annoyed face to her and motioned that the door was open. She just stared back at him through the window until he rolled it down, his face contorted in a frown.
"What are you doing?" he asked angrily. "Get inside."
"We need to talk."
Jason sneered at her. "Betty, you're already on thin ice with me. Now get in the fucking car."
Feeling herself getting shaky, she closed her eyes momentarily and fingered the necklace chain. It resolved her and she felt herself snapping back at him. "And you're on no ice with me, Jason."
Jason's face turned an ugly shade of red and she saw him throw open his car door and bang it shut behind him, before thumping over to her. She backed away slightly as he approached the passenger door, dodging his arm trying to grab her by mere centimeters. "What the fuck, Betty?"
"I'm not going with you to the party," she said, her fingers now clutching and squeezing down on the gold pen charm, as years of pent up anger at him washed over her. "I'm not going anywhere with you."
Jason once again tried to grab her and she backed away further up her yard, glaring at him. "What is this?" he asked, approaching her again and towering ominously over her. "Another one of your little attempts to break up with me, you stupid slut?"
Betty breathed heavily, trying not to start crying at his verbal punches. Somehow though, in this moment, she could see all his ugliness and maliciousness. She had always on some level blamed herself when he berated her or put her down, believing his propaganda about her inadequacies, but here, now, the devil in him was on full display before her and she could no longer look away and pretend it was her fault. "We're done, Jason," she said. Her voice was quiet but sharp as a knife.
Jason looked at her, shaking his head. He laughed, but the sound was mirthless. Then, before she knew what hit her, he succeeded in grabbing her left wrist, twisting her arm around her back and holding her in place. She struggled to remove herself from his grasp, but his grip was too strong."You don't say when we're done, Betty," he hissed. "Do you think a whore like you can do better than me? You do realize you'd be nothing without me don't you? And you know no one will ever want you. You're damaged goods."
Betty closed her eyes, trying to shut her ears to the torrent of abuse and ignore the pain shooting up her arm from where he was holding her wrist. She clutched the necklace with her free hand, her mind simultaneously running through any happy moment she could remember with Jughead and praying for Archie. Tears burned in her eyes but she kept her mind focused on the image of Jughead kissing her scars the first night they'd made love. She could almost feel his soft lips on hers, counteracting Jason's harsh grip on her skin. Then she heard it.
"Get off her," Archie hollered into the night air, his voice more abrasive than she'd ever heard it. Jason didn't seem to notice, his grip just getting stronger as he twisted her arm further. Betty grimaced in acute pain, before suddenly feeling herself free and dazedly slipping to the grass as she tried to regain her balance. She opened her eyes to see Veronica's warm but concerned face, and her hand reaching out to touch Betty's back. Behind her, she saw Archie had pinned Jason against his car, the space between his thumb and forefinger against Jason's neck. "I said," he repeated, "Get off her."
Jason tried to shove Archie off him, but the younger teen just tightened his hold, ramming Jason harder against the car. Jason looked back and forth between the three of them, angrier than she'd ever seen him, a beast who knew he'd been trapped. "Stay out of my business, Andrews," he seethed, but it was clear he couldn't back the taunt up.
Archie just glared at him. "If you ever lay a hand on Betty again, or even come near her, it'll be the end of you."
Jason gritted his teeth, but started to retreat as soon as Archie released him, heading back inside the car. "You want to pick that prude bitch over me, be my guest," he called from the window before speeding away.
Betty could feel her knees buckling as the last hint of his car disappeared down Elm Street. She was sure she would have fallen if Veronica hadn't been holding her up.
"I'm so so sorry Betty. We should have gotten here before he put his hands on you. Are you okay?" the brunette asked, her voice and face filled with worry.
"I'm fine…" she said, still disconcerted and hurting from where he'd gripped her, but also relieved. It was finally over.
Archie, still twitching slightly in adrenaline, came over and placed his hand on her arm. "Are you okay?" he asked.
"Yeah, I'm okay." She paused, letting herself feel the entire weight of the horribleness of the preceding moments and then shaking it away. She didn't want to think about Jason again. At least not now. She knew she'd ultimately have to deal with the residual trauma from their relationship, but for tonight she just wanted him banished from her mind. "I'm glad it's done."
"Come on. Let's go inside," Archie said, starting to lead both of them.
"No, it's okay," she stopped him. "Why don't you guys go to the party? You deserve to have a fun night."
"We want to stay with you, Betty," Veronica assured her.
"Really, it's okay. I just want to be alone and get some rest. The last few days have been a lot. I just need to sleep."
"You're sure?" Veronica asked.
"Yeah, I'll be fine." She walked to her door and turned back to offer them a weak smile. "I promise."
She shut the front door of her house behind her, thankful her parents had gone out that night. Standing against it, breathing heavily, her mind automatically traveled back to Jughead, the pen necklace still wrapped tightly in her hands. She could feel herself start to hyperventilate, imagining him that last day, imploring her to choose him, telling her what he needed, what he wanted. But she had been so stupid, so self-absorbed. Unable to take that final step, because of her own fears and insecurities, maybe even like he'd said because of stupid biases against his background. What if she'd fucked it all up? What if he never forgave her? What if she never got to feel him again, taste him, have him? She loved him, she confessed to herself. She was in love with him. Why hadn't she acted on it before? Why hadn't she broken up with Jason months ago? What had she been waiting for? The thoughts of self-loathing in her head spiraled and she almost reached to break open the skin of her hand, prevented only by the gold metal chain still threaded against her palm acting as a barrier.
"Don't," she commanded herself, conjuring his pleading eyes from the evening before, begging her to stop. All the conflicting emotions crashed inside her like a tidal wave, and she fell down against the door, feeling as if her heart were literally being torn in two. She had cried so much in the last 30 or so hours, but for the first time in three weeks, she let herself sob uncontrollably, feeling the numbness at the loss of him turn to an unmistakable, bone-crunching ache.
