chapter 2

paring: HP/TMR

rating: M

a/n: I meant to put TMR last chapter but I somehow thought TR was the right thing... fuck me. sorry, anyway get on with the story. *blushes and runs*


harry woke the next morning with the sun just glimpsing through the curtain, shining the room up. his watery eyes blurry as he blinked them open. he rested on his elbows as he reached for his glasses.

his eyes adjusted to the light and through his lenses, he stared at a wall for a few minutes trying to wake himself up.

"harry! get up and get down here!" Harry's adopted mum shouted. he grumbled under his breath and got out of bed, the cold air lightly nipping his exposed upper half.

"yeah, yeah." he muttered, almost tripping on his clothes that scattered the floor. "fuck–" he regained his composure against the wall and opened the door to the warmth of the heat.

he walked to the kitchen and his adopted mum stood in the kitchen, coffee in her hand as she strolled through her phone. she looked up and smiled at harry.

"morning, lovely. breakfast is in the microwave. I've got to go, but I'll see you later." she kissed his head as she gulped the rest of her coffee and rushed out the front door.

he waited 5 seconds before the door opened and she rushed in again, grabbing her Keyes and left. he hugged a laugh and went to grab his food and sit on the counter eating.

his thoughts came back to what he'd don't the night prior, horror washed over him as he froze, spoon halfway to his open mouth.

he blinked several times before he put down his bowl and sat, contemplating whether or not to just kill himself out of shame. but realised maybe it's not as bad as he'd originally thought. I mean, yeah— he'd watched some teen around his age get off. but then again, porn's basically the same thing.

those thoughts crept into his head like maggots and he shivered from that thought.

argh, why'd I think something like that, he whined to himself.

harry ran a hand through his hair before he jumped off the counter, tipping his breakfast in the bin and sprinting up the stairs to his room.

his room was still freezing cold so harry grabbed a jumper and there it on before jumping into his bed and grabbing his phone. he'd have to ring Ron, tell him about it.

"man, this is goonna be do awkward." he told himself before pressing the call button on Ron's contact and wanted for him to answer.

only a few rings later the line picked and Ron's groggy voice was heard, "harry, mate. it's not even 8, what do you want?" he heard Ron groan, stifling a laugh he clears his throat.

"man this is going to be, like, super weird but I need to tell you this or else I'll end up hating myself more, and I already hate myself enough as it is, and now I just feel so bad... and fuck, mate—"

"harry?"

"...yeah?"

"shut up. You're rambling and it's too early for this bullshit." Ron grumbled.

harry silently blushed and sighed, rubbing his eyes under his glasses.

"sorry... Okay, so like, I kinda got off last night—" Ron laughed, but harry continued, ignoring his friend, "—to a cam boy and now that I realised how weird that is, I... now I'm embarressed." harry stopped talking.

Ron on the other side of the phone wasn't talking, it was like that for maybe 15 seconds.

"Ron...?" harry asked.

"fuck— I wasn't expecting... that not that I was expecting much, but holy hell." Ron suddenly burst out laughing, his laugh turned into wheezing as he rolled around on the bed.

harry hearing his friends laugh didn't make him feel any better, so as a great best friend, he hung up. he stared at his phone, face red and burning.


the remainder of the day was the same thing, going over last night, blushing, thinking about the phonecall with Ron, blushing again, and then the same thing every few minutes.

he decided to take a shower to take his mind off everything that happened so few hours ago.

he merely just wished for it to go away, his head hurt with so much thinking, and he wasn't made for it.

after the shower he just out on some sweatpants and loose shirt before sitting on the couch. his phone beeped with messages from Ron, and some other people too.

he didn't want to see what ron had texted him, he'd probably hit him when he went back to school. or see him next. which he didn't want to be any time soon, just wanted everything to cool down a moment and forget of everything.

a different sound came from his phone and he checked it, furrowing his eyebrows. he didn't know that sound, so he picked his phone up and read it, face blank.

gred: Ron told me what you said, I thought I'd text you... I know how you feel, mate

gred: don't feel embarressed, I mean I did too when I first did the same thing

harry quirked an eyebrow and saw the text was from WhatsApp, he didn't have anyone on it since he'd only downloaded it a few days ago, but didn't bother to add any contacts.

harry decided to reply to the text.

hazza: how'd you get my WhatsApp?

gred: easy mate, but that's for me to know and you to not find out lol

hazza: right...

gred: awesoe, now I want to talk

gred: awesome* fucking autocorrect

harry laughed, before he answers fred's call, he placed his phone on speaker and rested it on the coffee table.

"ight mate?" Fred asked.

harry snorted with a huff, "I guess." he muttered, rubbing his cheeks.

Fred laughed and he heard shifting before he was talking again. "now, I know this may be a little... embarrasing to talk to about, to me. but you know I won't say nothing to anyone. got that?"

harry smiled, looking at his phone. "yeah, thanks."

"perfect, now I know how you feel, I was the same when I was younger. it only accerd after what I did that I wanted to hide away forever. but I got over it, it's not the end of the world.

"I felt like shit when I thought of what I'd done, but when I really thought, 'hey, that isn't as bad as I thought' and I did it again that time round, it felt a lot better. to me, I felt like it was okay, and that no one is going to bully me about it.

"there are a lot of people who do the same as me, and you. that also watches it, so what are they gonna say? nothing 'cause we're on the same page." fed finished his little speech. harry listened with great interest, feeling a little better about himself.

he mulled over it a bit and thought about what Fred said, he did notice the amount of people on the live and knew that if they'd have anything to say about it to him, then what was the point? they were doing the exact same thing. so what?

"holy, thanks Fred. I feel a little better about myself." harry finally said, picking up his phone. he had a small smile on his face.

fred huffed and chuckled, "no probs, mate."


a few days passed and harry thought back to the conversation, he wanted to do it again, watch it. but he didn't get the guts too, and he was feeling a little down. but it didn't matter, it wasn't like he needed to watch it.

harry sighed and grabbed his computer, turning it on and waited for it to load. he got lost in his thoughts for a few minutes.

he finally logged on and went to google, surching up the same link and clicked on, scrolling through it and paused.

he pondered on his thought for a few seconds, biting his lips he turned on his phone. he went trough his contacts and called Fred.

he waited for him to pick up and when he did, harry didn't hesitate.

"I want to make my own account."