Chapter 22
FearClan/Willow
The clutches of leafbare continued to hold fast on the forest. Occasional crying calls echoed through the snowy forest, seeming to be coming from somewhere very far away. Yet, Willow wasn't so sure. Three sunrises had passed since he had forced a small change in the eyes of the cats he would one day lead. Timber helped repair and clean out the dens with Hawk and himself while Shadow remained on fresh-kill duty. Ever so slowly, things seemed to be changing, except for one thing.
Juniper was becoming very ill, his scratches infected from the punishments he received from Pounce. Willow was fully aware, mostly thanks to Hawk confiding her fears that the young tom may not survive. His green eyes clouded with fever and pain while in the night he groaned and grumbled. He was always burning up, yet Hawk could do nothing to help and felt torn and useless. Leaving Willow to wonder how much longer his poor brother would have to suffer. The black tabby tom limped for those days, growing weaker and more lethargic then the day before.
Even on this crisp morning he watched his weakened brother limp breathlessly after Pounce. The older cat not breaking stride and only turning his head back with indifference and snap an order for him to hurry up. However, this time Juniper did not make it to him. He collapsed, heaving for air and coughing as the bitter heat ravaged his body. Yellow-colored foul-smelling stuff leaked from his injuries as he shivered in the snow. His eyes glazed and unfocused as he struggled to move.
Heather noticed instantly from where she had been teaching Ant to sink her claws into the frozen bark of the willow tree. She bounded over, her one good eye flashing with concern. The infection she was battling with snow alone had seemed to recover well. Yet, she paused, her sides heaving as she recoiled in disgust. Ant followed, hardly effected by the scent of a spoiled wound.
"Such horrid stench!" the rouge leader gagged.
Hawk narrowed her eyes, "That is the infection."
A harsh cry sounded somewhere close by, a familiar gekkering that brought shivers down Willow's spine. The pack of foxes had been running within the traces of the woodlands, their shrill cries echoing and being swallowed by the snow. So much so, none of them could tell where they were coming from exactly. What Willow did know was they could possibly smell the infection.
"The horrible stench is going to attract those foxes." growled Pounce, looking to Heather, "I'll lead him far away from camp. If fresh snow falls later today we will be safe."
"And if they follow your scent?" Heather challenged, "We cannot afford to loose an honorable cat like yourself."
Willow snorted, catching their attention. "Honorable? He's the reason Juniper has those infected wounds! Not to mention you and Shadow are the reason they couldn't be tended to."
"Pounce can still hunt." Heather snapped.
"So, he can find a safe place in the forest to keep the foxes on his tail." Willow pointed out, "If he is truly honorable, he wouldn't bring them back here, but lead them on a wayward rabbit chase through the territory."
"That could work, but Pounce would be vulnerable against them." Timber spoke up.
"We still have cats back here who need protection more then a cat who is responsible." Willow reminded them. "Since Heather is leader, she cannot go out there. So, why not let Pounce show us his true honorable cunning and bravery to keep us safe?"
Pounce flattened his black ears. "I can take care of myself, I'm not that old yet."
"Then take care of it." Heather ordered, "We have no need for a sickness to bring us more difficulties."
Pounce nodded grimly, walking to the kit who was only a quarter-moon away from his sixth moon. Willow felt his heart tighten in his chest, but nodded. He may have not gotten along well with his brother in these past moons. Let alone got along with his other littermates ever since he had been singled out as the future leader; but they were still his kin. He felt for them while Shadow looked horrified and about ready to fight the older tom himself.
However, Reed and Timber already swarmed to his side to hold him back. Ant and Nettle huddled close together with round eyes full of grief and hurt. Pounce lifted Juniper by the scruff and began to drag him away like a rabbit he just caught. No remorse was ever in those brown eyes. Only cold indifference that made him shudder in fear. This was a tom who did not welcome any form of change for as long as he had lived.
"Goodbye Juniper. I'm so sorry there was nothing Hawk or I could have done to change your fate." Willow murmured, feeling the comforting tail curl over his slowly broadening shoulders. He looked up to the kind pale green eyes that were glittering with sympathy.
"My apologies for your new loss, Willow." she mewed in a hushed whisper.
"It is not your fault." he told her, "it has never been your fault."
He knew how FearClan worked and it wasn't pretty. It never had been for as long as he could remember. He stared into those pale green depths that held sympathy and guilt. His heart seemed to clench in understanding as he knew what she felt. Taking a shaky breath, he turned back to his work of the dirty bedding to finish gathering it up.
"Such compassion for a cat who tried to rip you apart." Heather commented. flicking her tail.
"He is still my brother, no matter what has happened." Willow explained softly, "Take good care of my sister, Heather. That is all I wish for."
The rogue leader nodded, her honey-colored eye unreadable as she went back to training her charge. The teachings of the past three days had filled him with dread. Soon, they would be half way to the age where they would be considered part of the group and not just kits. Yet, he also remembered the teachings Hawk had given him about Clan-cats. And a promise that would only come when the clouds cleared for the meeting.
"The quarter moon is coming." Hawk whispered to him the day before. "Are you sure you would be ready to sneak away for it?"
"Please, I only need to know the way." he replied back, his stomach clenching in anxiety.
"I will ask you again on the day." she had promised.
Ever since Willow had been waiting patiently, knowing that soon his time would be up. The dreams he had since the had been with the trickles of water that often came from a creek or a stream. He knew that it wouldn't be long until he could visit the strange place, to let Hawk try to walk among the stars even for a moment.
His amber eyes glanced to Nettle and Ant who shared a saddened glance. Curiosity burned his paws. Would Juniper be among those very stars by then? Or their mother? He wanted to know. He had so much to ask of her to try and understand how a war with Clan-cats had meant so much to her that they had to be motherless and only know of her legacy.
If she is among the stars, does that mean she let her hate go? And if she isn't among the stars, where did she go? He wondered as he looked to Hawk, a brown tabby who is just as new to the dreams as he was to his own. With a nod, she took the messy bedding to bury it outside of camp on her own while he fixed up Pounce's nest to make it nice and warm for his return.
Yet, he wasn't so sure he wanted Pounce to ever come back home. It was the tom's fault that Juniper had so many ugly scratches. He was just as responsible as Heather was in the outcome of things. His fur rose along his shoulders in irritation. Thistle and Dusk had died and now Juniper is on the way of leaving them. Hawk had explained what jealousy was to him and ever since he had known his brother was jealous.
What is there to be jealous of? Willow thought sadly, padding the moss into place. As far as I can tell, nothing about my future position in FearClan is truly worth living for.
. . .
The sky was clear on the first night Pounce was away. The excited yelps echoed to their camp, making Willow shiver in fear. His sisters huddled close to Timber who purred in her sleep. The half moon hung somewhere out there, lighting the snow as he watched the entrance of the den. Heather was snoring on the other end of the willow-den in a deep sleep. Feeling uncomfortable and restless, he rose to his paws and began to make his way out. With soft steps, he reached the outside world once more where the chilled breeze ran through his long fur.
An owl hooted among the trees, the reeds clattering noisily while he took his steps out to stretch his legs. His eyes opened wide to see with the faintest of lights. His breath billowing out in a cloud of fog as he crept around the near-silent crunching snow. There was no scent of danger, even as he looked to the top of the gnarled roots of the willow tree. Where his father was perched up high with his gaze trained upon him in surprise.
Swiftly, Shadow climbed down the root, his black tabby fur rippling in the moon's silvery light. His pale green eyes were strangely calm as he padded up to him. "Can't sleep?" he murmured.
Willow looked away, "No. I have too many questions that would never have any answers now."
"Not even I can help?"
"Help?" he looked to his father, hurt in his gaze. "How can you help me if you can't even help FearClan properly?"
"FearClan is not my birthplace." he reminded his son, "I only joined to be with your mother."
"Then why don't you leave?" he asked, his tone bitter. "Dusk is no longer here, so there is nothing really left for you here."
"I have you and your sisters."
His paws felt cold, the icy chill of the snow making them burn and go numb. "FearClan is looking after us, there is nothing for you to do that involves us."
"That may be true, but someone has to make sure Hawk doesn't take you off the path you must tread." Shadow explained, his green gaze becoming as sharp as thorns. "You must lead FearClan properly without softness. You are not a kittypet or a Clan-cat, you have to be as fierce as they are."
Willow sighed softly, knowing he was talking to a tree. "I'm not Cedar, Shadow. None of us are. Hawk does her best and I accept that she could have saved Juniper if Heather had allowed her to gather herbs to tend to those wounds before leafbare we wouldn't have to send them out."
"You say that with such conviction-" Shadow began, a growl growing in his mew; but was stopped when Willow raised his tail tip to silence him.
"I know, I know. It's just thistle-down, cloud-fluff even, to speak on what Clan-cats know. I can never change your mind on that, but give Hawk some credit. She has improved in her hunting and she has been teaching me well. In her heart and mind you are still her treasured brother, never forget that. She has given up her entire life just to try and make right to what she had done." He turned back to the willow-den.
"And I don't get to say my piece?" Shadow snarled, his tail lashing.
"You have, many times over." Willow replied without looking back. "Even if you apologize to me about how Hawk has been treated by you, it would change nothing. I'm not the one you must apologize to in the long run. You are as much FearClan as Pounce is. Never born apart of it, but merged so deep, you will stop at nothing to avenge a dead she-cat." He padded to the willow-den, feeling more at ease. "At least, you can answer one of the questions on my mind. I shall rest well, Shadow."
He left the tom he occasionally thought of as his father and slipped back into the willow-den. His heart still heavy with grief as he took his place once more in his nest. This time, he curled up in it and closed his eyes. Was it disrespectful to his father to not let him speak? He had done what he could, knowing that his father would never change his mind. After all, his only ties to Cedar were them and nothing else.
Feelings still muddled about his torn apart family, sleep came ever so slowly to welcome him to a place where the questions could no longer plague him.
Author Note:
2020 has ended and 2021 has begun. With it, the continuation of this story. I get caught up with Shiny Hunting in Pokemon Sword and nuzlockes in the earlier installments of pokemon. However, I was fighting a blank page for a long time.
Willow's chapters tend to halt me in my tracks because I know how I want his side of the story to go, but it is hard to twist all the loose ends together. I will keep doing my best on this story because I know how I want it to end, I just have to get there through story building!
Have a good day/night and thank you for reading. - NightSky
