Chapter 4

05:03am.

Blaze had stayed up for most of the night. Her eyes were puffy, red and blurred from the tears as she quietly looked out at the city below. She was still there, sitting in the very same spot where Axel had left her. Blaze hadn't eaten anything and had barely moved from the bed that the two of them were laying in at this time less than 24 hours ago. As she watched the sun come up, any hope Blaze had yesterday of Axel changing his mind and returning had now faded. She wore his T-shirt over her skin where it still held onto Axel's scent, although by now, there were wet stains over the front of it at the top from where she had been crying.

There was no way of reaching Axel as his cell phone was still here. She figured that he had no need for it once he had decided to vanish into nothing. So Blaze decided to pick up then take a look through her own phone for the first time in days. She swiped away all of the missed calls and new messages. None of it felt relevant to her and she had no energy left or interest in replying to them.

Blaze then came across her wallpaper on the phone which the two of them had changed almost a week ago. It was a picture of her and Axel. He was behind her, holding her whilst his head rested against the side of hers. That was the day when the couple first visited the beach. The two of them were laughing when Blaze tried to hold the camera still in order to get a good pose without cutting him out. They looked so happy there and that's how it really was. Blaze took a deep gulp as she passed it, then she began to scroll through her contacts list.

Blaze had no idea what to do next, but she knew that she couldn't stay here any longer. Although Axel had left her the keys to the place and his car, none of it felt right without him here. She still had decided to hold onto them with the plan of checking up on the apartment from time to time so that it was ready for when Axel decided to come back. In the end, he had a home, a mortgage, taxes to pay and a car to run. That gave Blaze some hope that Axel had valid reasons to return, even if it wasn't for her.

She slowly placed her phone to her ear, sniffling from her nose at the same time. It rang several times in a row, but Blaze held on without hanging up.

"Hello?" The voice on the other side of the line certainly wasn't expecting a call at this time of the morning.

"Adam? It's me…" Blaze quietly replied.

His annoyed 'hello' immediately softened as soon as Adam heard her voice. "Hey, what's wrong? Are you ok? You don't sound good…" he immediately sat up in his own bed, feeling worried.

At that point, Blaze struggled to answer him. Her hands shook and her eyes started to water once again.

"Blaze, what's wrong? Where have you been? The Commissioner at work almost filed a missing report on you over the last 10 days because you never showed up. But I knew you left the club with Axel, so I figured you'd gone with him or something…"
"No, I'm still here." She took a deep breath. "But he's gone now…" Blaze's voice started to croak.

"Look, stay where you are. I'm coming to get you, ok?"

"Ok," Blaze quietly nodded, staring into space.


To say that the last night alone for Axel was any easier than it was for Blaze would have been a lie. Although he had left his car outside the apartment block, he had stolen an unused motorbike from one of the back streets. Axel fixed it up then fed it just about enough gas to take him away from the city, close enough to where he needed to be.

Still seriously torn with the dilemma that Axel faced, he took it upon himself to test the waters first, remaining in two minds. So he camped himself far away, yet close enough to the edge of the city somewhere up the coast in case he needed to return. The only thing that helped Axel get an hour's sleep that night was the bottle of hard spirit he had kept by his side. He watched the low tide come in on the smooth sandy beach with his back against the rocks. The silence here was golden and this place was only a taster of what was to follow if he chose to remain along this path.

But Axel suddenly had his doubts. Leaving Blaze was the hardest thing he had ever done. What made it worse was none of this was her fault. Thoughts darted through his head such as, 'am I being selfish?'; 'am I chasing something that simply doesn't exist?'. The hardest question he had continued to ask himself was, 'what if I'm walking away from the best thing that's ever happened to me?'

During the last ten days, he had really felt alive for the first time in his life. Axel couldn't recall another time where he remembered ever being that happy. What had developed was something way beyond a normal relationship. He only wished that he'd acted on his instincts sooner beyond the friendship zone with Blaze. Consciously, his departure didn't make any sense for this reason. Axel now had everything he had ever needed back in Wood Oak City. But now that the battle in protecting the city was over, the fighter inside of him still craved more. Combat was all too familiar from a young age. Axel had fought for years, not just on the streets, but in his everyday life too.

Most people had underestimated Axel in the past by expecting that he would amount to nothing. But he exceeded every one of those expectations far and beyond. After a difficult upbringing following the murder of his parents by the syndicate, he dropped out of school at the age of 14. Axel quickly had to adapt to being alone. This made it difficult for him to work in a team, so when it came to applying for a job at WOPD, that was one of the biggest challenges he remembers early on in his career. Luckily for Axel, his best friend Adam had his back throughout it all and believed in him. A young man quickly progressed then made a successful life for himself, proving all of those doubters wrong. Then when Blaze came into his life, she believed in him too. He had seen good in her and although she was the youngest on their team, her outlook on life had inspired him to do better.

But now, a part of Axel didn't want to be alone again. He would have been the luckiest guy in the world to settle down with someone like Blaze for the rest of his life. But that felt like the easy way out, for both of them. They were at an age where, despite the fights they had endured, they still had more to discover about themselves. She was a fighter too and neither of them were ready to quit that. As the saying goes, 'the fight only hurts when you stop'. But was Axel now willing to fight for his own sanity or to fight for her?

As the dawn and purple sky started to appear over the ocean, Axel stood up to his feet then he got back on the bike. There were two directions - Wood Oak City or into the unknown. So he rode at speed once again for what felt like hours.

And there the moment was. On the open road, he suddenly swerved the bike around, then he turned back to go home. It was as if this last night was all just a bad dream. Axel needed to see her again. He needed a second to make sure that Blaze was ok, even though she said she would be. He already missed her badly, even though he was barely gone. Axel hated the fact that he left so abruptly in the way that he did without saying goodbye. He just wanted to see Blaze one last time.

So he stopped on the bike for a moment with his black helmet down over his face by the side of one of the kiosks opposite his apartment block. Axel then saw Adam's car parked across the street with Blaze talking to him outside of the entrance to the building. It was a little more comforting to know that Adam was here, like he'd promised to be when Axel had counted on him. And if anybody could look out for Blaze while he was gone, Adam was the best person to do that.

It suddenly hurt Axel deep down as soon as he noticed Blaze crying on Adam's shoulder in the distance. The person who had once always kept her vulnerable emotions relatively silent in front of others was now pouring her heart out in the middle of the street. Axel froze there silently for a moment, feeling guilty for everything and for letting things get this far. All he wanted to do right now was go over there to hold her and tell her that everything would eventually be ok. But there and then, Axel realized that he never deserved her. At least, not until he returned back as a better man. In that second, he wanted to give Blaze some hope. He just couldn't stand seeing her cry anymore.

So Axel decided to turn towards one of the baristas under the kiosk next to him on the sidewalk. The short, stocky bald man had immediately recognised his voice, even under the helmet.

"Hey Mitch, could you do me a favour?" Axel asked.

"Sure, what's up?"

"Could you give this note to that lady over there across the street. The one with the long brown hair?"

"Of course,"

"Thanks". His windshield was down and the engine of the bike had revved up once again, way before the barista had made it over to the other side of the street.

Blaze frowned in the sunshine with her hold still around Adam, surprised when the stranger passed her the note.

"What's that?" Adam asked her.

"I don't know…"

She anxiously unfolded the torn off piece of paper which read,

'I'm coming back for you, I promise x'

That small comforting sentence made all the difference to Blaze, making everything slightly brighter in restoring her faith in the future.

"See? I told you everything would be ok…" Adam reassured her as she frantically scanned around the street.

She dried her eyes, eventually giving Adam a half hearted smile back. Although Blaze was still hurting, the note at least gave her some hope that their separation wouldn't last forever. And she was happy to wait. He was worth it.


Axel had rode for hours out of the city as far as he could go. Skyscrapers soon turned into suburbs, suburbs turned into fields, then fields turned into mountains that finally turned into terrain. He could have been anywhere by now. The only thing that was certain was that he had travelled West towards the sunset until there was nothing left around him for miles. Eventually when the fuel on the bike ran out again, Axel left it by the side of a field then continued his difficult journey on foot. Once he had passed the valley lakes, there was no turning back and it was hard to tell exactly where he had ended up after several hours. Whether that was still America or through the borders to elsewhere like the Lima Nations was a mystery.

The first night in the wilderness was the one he would always remember most. With only the clothes off his back and one backpack containing essentials including a knife, this was the ultimate test of his own survival. He was hungry, thirsty and cold, but this was how Axel had expected it to be. He was no stranger to the outdoors. In fact as a young child, his father would often take him camping in the woods. Axel had already learnt the survival fundamentals by the age of 7.

Despite the many setbacks he was feeling right now, Axel took in the fresh night air and the silence was calming. He felt glad to have seen Blaze again one more time, even though it was from afar. And he hoped that the note at least had made her feel better. Axel had hoped it had reminded her that, even though he had left for the time being, he was never giving up on what they had. But all of that was now buried in the back of his mind for another time. Tomorrow was the start of a new day. The chance to be reborn again, to learn not just about breaking limits, but to delve deeper into learning about himself.

Axel laid his head to rest against one of the trees. The ground underneath him was soft but cold. One of the first tests he was about to face was if he could make it through the night, physically. The temperature range out in the wilderness this time of year was extreme. The daytime temperature would often surpass 90 degrees Fahrenheit whereas at night, it could drop to less than 40. Axel understood that his body needed to quickly adapt to these sudden changes, especially if he were to survive hypothermia or overheating.

With all of that said, there and then, he was almost at peace with his surroundings. A single flame slowly appeared above one of his hands that he used to light up a stack of wood close by to keep his body warm. This was indeed one of the reasons why Axel had longed to go through this self-discovering journey. From a young age, he understood that he was different from others. Axel would often play with fire as a child, fascinated by how it worked. He was never afraid of it. In fact he relished in the burn and would often feel it deep inside of his veins. He could create and control fire out of nothing, but Axel rarely used it or spoke about it. Delving into the act of pyrokinesis was often dangerous, not to mention the fact that it physically took its toll on him. One objective of this journey that he was on was learning how to manipulate this energy he had always known further. And how he could use this fire he had inside of him without it leaving him drained.

Axel's priority for tonight however was to simply just get through the night. He was acutely aware of the dangers close by including bears, wolves and even poisonous plants.

Exhausted and famished, Axel sat down then leaned back against the tree. He then took a sip of the water that he had purified earlier from a now half-empty bottle the size of half a litre. This was more than enough for the rest of the night. At that moment when he sipped it back, that was the first time that Axel noticed hundreds, if not thousands of stars clustered above him in the night sky. The moon was also a thin bright white crescent. He had never witnessed anything like it and was awe struck by what he saw.

Whilst it was beautiful and soothing for the soul, it almost felt like he now existed on his own planet. At that moment however, the same heavy realization that had played on his mind kicked in. He was now alone once again. And the life Axel had left behind was, for now, a distant memory.