How to Make a Family
Helluva Boss and all related characters belong to Vivziepop
"So let me get this straight… due to simply being acquaintances, if even that, we're now the target of a sinner mob boss." Moxxie went over what Blitzo had just told him and Millie.
"And not just you, Loona, my currently living family, a friend who works at the club…. Yeah." Blitzo said, as the white haired him nodded slowly.
"Well Millie, looks like we're having that vacation a few years earlier than we thought! I hear the lust ring is decent this time of year!" Moxxie began packing, as Millie stopped him.
"Aw Moxxie stop it! This man's in trouble, and so're we! The worst we could do is at least help him if he has a plan!" Millie said, as Moxxie paused.
"DO you have a plan?" He asked as Blitzo didn't look too sure…
"Of course I have a plan! Fucking great plan! We go in and kill them!" The taller imp said as Moxxie stared.
"Right, Millie where'd you put my underwear?"
"Moxx!"
"Millie I'm not about to die because some rejected clown from Loolooland thought it was a good idea to piss off A MOB BOSS!" Moxxie yelled as he struggled to get free from his wife's surprisingly impressive grip.
"Oh come on! It gets a MAJOR scumbag out of Hell and outta our lives PLUS you kinda do something good! And you two seem really eager to do somethin' like that kinda shit!" Blitzo said as he fluttered his eyes.
"Moxx how can we say no ta that face? We gotta help 'im!" Millie said as she motioned at the innocent looking face Blitzo was trying to make.
"No we don't and very easily I can do that! NO!" Moxxie yelled as he took the moment to try and book it.
"MOXXFORD PITCHFORD!" Millie snapped at her husband, as he went still as a board.
"Pfft, 'Moxxford'?" Blitzo said as Millie's glare snapped at him which instantly shut him up.
"You were the best at darts back home. I ain't ever seen ANYONE with aim like yours. If there's guns, you'll be the best bet on that end." Millie said, taking charge.
"But, Mill-" Moxxie tried, but stopped short as Millie grabbed his hands.
"I know it's dangerous, hon… But I don't think we got a choice in this one. And runnin' is just a quick fix. We get in, out, fast? We won't have anything to worry about."
"... why do you always have to make so much sense?" Moxxie grumbled under his breath.
"Cause someone's gotta hun." Millie replied before giving him an adorable peck of the cheek.
"... that is just ADORABLE. For real you two. That was just cute." Blitzo giggled at the sight. "Sooo-"
"As fer YOU?"
"Me? I got something to do?! Oh wait DUH I do. I get to kill every stupid sonofabitch in there!" Blitzo snapped with a demented look in his eyes.
"You got a holy weapon'a some kind? 'Cause that's the ONLY way we're killin' a sinner." She asked as Blitzo pulled out two holy bullets, procured by Stolas for this very mission.
"One in the chest, one in the head should do it." He said as Millie nodded.
"And we also gotta rescue Prince Stolas' daughter, we do that we get thirty thousand, each."
"Wait Stolas's own DAUGHTER is also trapped and we're JUST having thirty-?!" Moxxie started before Blitzo shoots him a look of panic.
"BELIEVE ME it's… it's better then him getting PERSONALLY involved." He replied as he seemed to have a scared look in his eye.
"Wait if you saw it then how are you even alive to tell it?" Moxxie asked.
"Not enough time Moxx! Alright then Blitzo you kill the Sinner dude and git yer girls out. As fer me and Moxx? We can give ya some cover… been needin' ta get mah first bloodbath goin'!"
"Fuck you are so hot right now…" Moxxie said as a smirk formed on his face, moving closer and holding Millie tight.
"Aw, ya charmer you! Why I-" Millie stopped midsentence… as Blitzo was hugging both of them.
"So we gettin' this threeway started now or-"
Before he knew what hit him, he was kicked out of the hotel room.
"Well worth a shot"
"This is a terrible idea Mills. I mean I'm fine with tearing this place a new ass but I feel like it's a bit much." Moxxie said as they stood right outside the doors of The Suck It Up. Dressed like they wanted to level the whole place with a variety of guns that were just poking out in their duffle bags.
"Darlin' ya know it's somethin' Ah've always wanted ta do!" Millie said with a gushing expression.
"... oh how can I say no to that face?"
Millie gripped her battle axe tight… as she kicked down the door.
"'Sup fellas?" As she slammed the axe into one of the gangsters to her right, splitting his head in one swipe.
"We're here to kick ass and chew… Line?" Moxxie lamely said as he shot three more gangsters in the head, without even looking.
"Eh, fuck it." Moxxie said as he whipped out an M4 and began spraying bullets. Millie, a sadistic grin forming on her lips, leaped head first into the throng of gangsters.
"BONZAI!" She let loose as her battlecry as she bisected several thugs at once.
"And a little jimmy here… and a little jimmy there… presto." Blitzo whispered to himself as his tail exited the lock it was going through… before he just kicked it open and rolled into the place. Taking a good quick survey of the layout.
"Man, this place still reeks like desperation." He groaned to himself. He soon kept an ear out and heard a clashing sound, an axe chopping heads off bodies, and maybe a few guns going off. Maybe one of them might help that Moxxie guy into being halfway interesting.
He could hear sniffling and crying coming from Henroin's office.
"... alright asshat. Time to get fucked…" Blitzo said… before dragging his hand down his face.
"Ugh, that sounded so much better in my head." He muttered as he kicked the door in and aimed his glock right at Henroin… who had a gun aimed directly at Octavia's head, who was currently sitting in his lap.
"We had some laughs, a little business… But now it's over imp. This little beaut is loaded with holy slugs… One'ta kill her… And the rest? Well I'd say it's overkill usin' 'em on ya, but after all the FUCKIN' headaches ya put me through, I think I'll take the loss. So ya got two choices…. Put the piece down and I splatter ya fuckin' brains over the wall… or I shoot this little bird brain, pin the whole idea on you, and let the Owl Fucker have his turn at ya… What's it gonna be Blitzo?" Henroin said… as Blitzo glared…. And shot him in the hand, the holy bullet burning straight through it.
"FUCK!" Henroin had to drop his gun as Octavia bolted from his lap and ran to the corner of the office.
"... the name's Blitz." The imp said as he fired one more shot… in between the sinner's many eyes. Looking to the corner of the office, Blitzo saw a terrified Octavia, sniffling and crying.
"Hey sweetie… I'm uh… A friend of your dad's… Yeah. How about we go see him huh?"
"... okay."
PLEASE REVIEW!
