Chapter 14
Minako tried hard not to show how worn down she felt as Seiji pulled her up the never-ending staircase into a shrine that seemed to loom above them like a living thing – a vulture ready to bear down on them and swallow them whole.
She tried not to shudder at the sight of it and focused on putting one foot in front of the other as they bolted up the stairs. If she didn't pay attention to her feet, she was afraid the steps would give way. They were ancient and crumbling, and didn't look like they could support a cat, never mind a full-grown adult human.
Another urgent tug came from in front of her, and Minako tried hard not to feel like a rag doll. Her companion had been moving like death was right behind them since the incident in the cemetery. And since death sort of was dogging their footsteps, she couldn't really blame him. The weird looks she'd been getting gave her an idea that he was also uncomfortable with the whole…previous death thing, and Minako wasn't quite sure how to help him come to terms with it.
Honestly, she hadn't really come to terms with seeing her past corpse herself. So trying to make him feel comfortable seemed fairly impossible. And she didn't expect him to just accept it. It was weird. Even to her. And she'd lived through it.
Was he grossed out by it now? Did he think she was a zombie or something? Clearly, her…other body was lying in that grave, so how could she be a zombie?
Holy cow…was she a zombie?
And if that version of herself was lying around, what other ones were lying around? Minako shuddered as she envisioned zombie versions of her past selves and the other Senshi hopping around with their arms out in front of them, looking for humans to eat. She cringed away from the image. And what about Sailor Moon?! Was there a zombie Sailor Moon wandering around?!
No. No. No way. There was only one Sailor Moon and she was very much alive, and it was Minako's life mission to keep it that way, thankyouverymuch.
And anyways…the Silver Crystal could only be used by the living version of Usagi…right?
Creeped out by her own thoughts, Minako scrunched her shoulders up and gave her body a good shake, like a dog getting out of a pond. Seiji stopped so abruptly then she collided with his back, a tiny oof escaping her lips.
She couldn't even bemoan the fact that she continued to act like a flake around him. She shouldn't be letting her heart pound like taiko drums any time their skin touched or their eyes locked. She definitely shouldn't be letting the warmth blossom in her chest when he held her hand or showed her concern.
It was hard not to do those things around him though. Seiji was handsome, classy, and good. He was a gentleman. He was attentive, solicitous…he was all the things that generally got her attention. A sort of fairy tale prince. He…kind of reminded her of the other boys she'd always crushed on. Boys that had never really shared her feelings.
And in comparison, Minako was…
Well. She was cursed anyways, wasn't she? Cursed in Love. And she needed to remember it. Seiji was a nice guy, and he deserved better than that. She looked up at him but her eyes widened when she saw something unexpected instead.
A pair of eyes the color of pale jade and an equally pale face framed by a fall of silver hair flashed in her mind's eye, layering over the face in front of her like a phantom. A reminder. Minako felt the breath freeze in her lungs for a moment, but then the vision dissolved to reveal a different face.
An eye the grey-blue – almost violet - of distant icy mountain peaks seemed to pierce right through her, its partner hidden beneath a thick, shaggy fall of hair nearly the same color as her own. Gold and not silver. Violet and not jade. Piercing instead of distant. Kunzite had always had a way of looking through her, as if she weren't there or he weren't.
But Seiji…
"Minako." The use of her first name in such a firm, centered voice startled her back to herself. He'd braced his hands on her shoulders and was giving her a small shake. His face was hard to read, but he looked…tense. She'd made everything so awkward after crying like that in the cemetery, hadn't she? She chided herself at the loss of control. She was so much better than that. Crush or not, past life weirdness or not, he was her partner, and she hadn't really been showing Seiji her best self, had she?
Minako tried to shore herself up beneath his intense, assessing stare with an attempt at a cheerful smile, flashing him the V for Victory sign.
"Sorry! Guess my mind was wandering!" she rubbed the back of her head, feeling sheepish for letting her emotions eat away at her focus. She had no business thinking about love – past, present, or future right now. Her distraction could get them killed. She waited for Seiji to turn back around and resume hauling them both up the stairs, resolving to be less of a drag.
Instead, he shocked her by pulling her into his arms and wrapping her in a warm embrace. What was he doing? What was he…
Minako felt her face flush even as her body relaxed in the warmth of his arms. He held her in silence for a moment – long enough for the sense of comfort and safety to seep into her bones and calm her tense muscles even as it kicked up the racing of her heart. She forgot to feel self-conscious. She didn't ever want him to let go.
…But he should. He really should. Before her heart overrode her brain and she started getting really stupid and mushy. Cursed, right? He was totally barking up the wrong tree.
"I'm the one who's sorry. I'm sure the scene in the cemetery was difficult. I admit I'm struggling to understand what happened. …All of it. But I can't imagine seeing…what we saw was easy for you to process. I've been focused on finding the others and getting us to safety. I was hoping maybe the other Senshi could help you, but I guess I was tuning everything else out. If you need something, please tell me. I want to help."
Oh.
Oh no.
Minako felt a tell-tale burning rim her eyes, and she shoved the tears back ruthlessly. She'd already cried. Too much. How had she let herself be so vulnerable in front of this man? A complete stranger? He didn't feel like a complete stranger as he kept her enveloped in a hug that felt….amazing, frankly. It was like being wrapped up in her favorite blanket.
It soothed raw edges. It banished the dark, violent memories that had been lurking at the edges of her consciousness. It was everything she needed right now and she didn't want to let go. He was taking care of her, and dammit, when was the last time somebody had wanted to take care of her?
Instead of overthinking it, wasting the gift of the moment, Minako closed her eyes, pulled in a deep breath, and let Seiji Date hug the shadows away. Just for a minute. A blip in time when she could let just a little of herself be vulnerable. Comforted.
She argued with herself to pull away. She buried her face in his strong shoulder and concentrated on pulling herself together. She reminded herself of all the reasons she couldn't go soft. Let her guard down. Usagi and the other Senshi were counting on her, and every minute she let herself unravel was a minute they could be hurt and needing her.
Finally, Minako forced herself to pull away from Seiji with incredible reluctance and took a deep breath.
"I'm sorry," she told their shoes, unable to look him in the eye. Or anywhere else but the ground. "I didn't mean to hold us back. I promise I'm going to do better. I'll be focused. We'll find everyone and then get out of here. I'll be a partner you can count on." Absolute silence greeted her at the end of her pronouncement. Blinking, she finally looked up into Seiji's face.
And was completely confused by his facial expression.
Was he angry? Sad? Frustrated?
She had no idea. But he seemed to be struggling under some great burden of emotion, his brows furrowed, eyes squeezed shut, and chin clenched so hard she was worried he might crack his teeth. He clenched his hands into fists, and then tilted his head down and to the side.
"Is that what you think?" he said quietly. "That I'm blaming you for holding us back?" His voice began to rise in volume at the end of the sentence. "Aino, you've…been through a lot. You have every right to need rest. Comfort. You deserve those things. You've been so strong. You've been shouldering the burden of our safety without saying a word. I'm so damn useless here. I wish I could do more for you, but I can't. Everything is on you, and that's…I'm having a hard time dealing with it," he admitted shamefully, his voice so low at the end she had to strain to catch it. Minako put a hand to her chest, both fascinated and a little unsure of what to do with the outpouring of strong…emotion from him.
Great. She'd made him feel bad. Seiji had given her nothing but patience and understanding. He might think of himself as useless, but he'd been carrying his own weight. She wasn't sure what he had going on upstairs, but she really hoped he wasn't thinking his worth was only tied to his armor.
She put a hand on his shoulder and stared up at him in earnest, searching his gaze, trying to get him to make eye contact. "Seiji that's silly. Everything isn't on me. You've been the one guiding us. You jump into any fight, no matter what's going on. Maybe my powers are getting us past the monsters, but you've been the one beating them down. I'm exhausted. I probably don't have much of a punch in me, to be honest. You've been great, Seiji. Don't underestimate your value. You're more than just a suit of armor, you know?" She hadn't meant to use his first name, but it had slipped out in her eagerness to make him listen to her.
They stood in a stilted, strange silence for a moment. He didn't really….react. He didn't say anything. Minako tried to ignore the part of her that fell flat at his lack of response. Wanting to get things back to some sort of normal, she turned and began resuming the trek up the stairs. She didn't know what else to say to him. Much more and she'd be spouting poetic nonsense that took them far past the line of camaraderie and into dangerous territory.
She was frustrated with herself. She couldn't seem to do anything right, and she'd made a mess of things with him. He made her feel vulnerable. He made her want. Things she hadn't wanted since she was back in London, alone, trying to fight the Dark Kingdom. She'd been wild then, and selfish. She was too old to allow herself to be selfish now. After decades alone, with nothing but battle after battle, meeting and losing loved ones and friends, she was tired. She was just tired. And so lonely.
And Seiji was reminding her of all the things that were far out of her reach. It made her feel bitter and angry. It reminded her how little value she really had. If she wasn't good at being a Senshi, then what on earth was she good for? What else was there for her? She was afraid of the answer to that question. Afraid that without the Senshi side of her, she wasn't anything to anyone.
The thought was terrifying.
A strong hand clasped her wrist, halting her mid-step and puling her back from the panicked swirl of thoughts invading her head.
"Wait."
Minako turned, looking at the man behind her. His face was closed off but something about his expression reeled her in. Made her pause. He ascended the steps instead, coming beside her.
He was looking at her now, that intense gaze boring inside of her even as his expression remained a complete mystery. She felt unsettled beneath that gaze. Like she couldn't hide anything from him, while his face didn't give a hint as to what might be going on inside his head. Determined not to shrink from him, she met his eyes, stare for stare.
And realized that if she looked closely enough, she could see beneath that stone gaze, maybe just a little. He wasn't an open book exactly, but she could see something. Something that made her breath quicken and a strange buoying sensation fill her stomach. Like a million butterflies trying to take flight all at once, carrying her with them.
She didn't understand what any of it meant. The silence between them stretched thinner and thinner, at least to Minako's mind, until his gaze suddenly dropped.
To her lips.
Her heart rate kicked off like a mad hare, thumping quickly and haphazardly in her chest, beating on her ribs as if it might be pounding at a door.
He….he wasn't going to kiss her, was he?
She should probably put a stop to this.
Right?
Their breaths mingled as his face angled closer to hers. She wanted to feel ridiculous – she barely knew him – but Seiji was different. He was serious. Courteous. Intent. He didn't do anything lightly. He reminded her a hell of a lot of Rei. So much going on inside but a fraction of it visible on the surface. And now all of that – surface and everything beneath – was focused on her with a singled minded, passionate intent.
And Minako…wasn't going to say no to it.
She had no idea what she was doing. No idea where this was going. It was probably a very, very bad idea.
But she wasn't going to stop it.
His gaze lowered and her lashes fluttered closed in response. Her heartbeat hammered in the cage of her chest and her skin flushed with warmth even as her breath stilled in her lungs.
And then the lightest of touches landed against her lips. It didn't linger long – pure and sweet, it said a great deal without saying a single word. Minako just wished she knew what it had said. He pulled away much too quickly and Minako breathed out, her eyes blinking open slowly, as if she might just be waking up. Everything felt warm and bright for a moment.
His face was still close to her own, and he smiled the tiniest smile, reaching up with a gentle hand to caress the hair from her forehead with that same light, sweet touch. "You're a special woman, Minako Aino," he murmured, his gaze taking in all of her face now.
And then suddenly he was pulling away, turning, and mounting the stairs again like he hadn't just given her a kiss worthy of a romcom. He pulled her behind him with a gentle clasp on her wrist, keeping her close to him, protective, perhaps even moreso now.
Minako blinked as she followed, staring at his strong, confident back and wondering what had just transpired between them.
Did he just…kiss her?
She was pretty sure he'd just kissed her.
This time, Minako was helpless against the flush of warmth that swamped her system.
She'd been really good so far, in her life, at avoiding serious romantic entanglements. But Seiji Date? He might just be the wrecking ball that destroyed the wall she'd built around her heart.
Heaven help her if he managed it.
