Edventures in Positivity!

Chapter 1 – The Great Ed-scape


The quiet ambience of the basement did not last long as the door that served as an entrance to it was knocked off it's own hinges as the basement's only resident charged in, his face tensed up in full-blown panic as he ripped one of his shoes off, revealing one of his over-worn socks that he attempted to yank off with his teeth, which proved to be a struggle as he ended up hopping around his basement room, obliviously trashing it to no end until at last he finally got the sock off.

"Trouble! Bad! Pain!" The boy exclaimed still in complete distress as he grabbed two comic books and a figure of some form of monster among other junk before shoving it into the sock, using it as a makeshift bag before shoving two pieces of bread in a toaster before setting it to go off. He then spotted a used recliner chair and opened the sock-bag up before lifting the chair off the floor with little to no struggle and shaking it as random assorted items fell out of said chair from a hole at the bottom that was soon followed by the chair's stuffing and lastly the chair itself.

He then rushed into the basement's bathroom and ripped a piece of wallpaper off the wall, which revealed a collection of sponges of assorted colours. At that point, the toaster had finished and ejected the toast which he grabbed and slathered it with butter before shoving it into the sock-bag and rushing back out of the basement, but not before taking the collection of sponges with him.

"Beloved parents. By the time you read this, I will be long–far–oh, dear."

Meanwhile, another boy was at a desk in his bedroom trying to write a note. Under so much emotional pressure however, he ended up folding the note and putting it in the trash along with many other failed attempts at said note before trying again from scratch.

"Dearest Mother and Father. It is with great sh-shame…"

He briefly paused, dropping his pen in the process and breaking down into sobs. He barely managed to pull himself together before resuming with the note.

"That I regretfully con-fess...to… I regretfully confess to my involvement in the inexcusable, unconscionable, reprehensible, abhorrent, detrimental, detestable, immoral..."

"...THOUGHTLESS…!"

"HURTFUL…!"

The boy ended up screaming the last two words as the stress ultimately took it's toll on him, causing his writing to become jagged before he finally stopped once more.

"OH, WHAT HAVE WE DONE?!" He wailed loudly before collapsing into hysterical sobs, pulling his legs up which covered his face. However, his bout of emotional collapse was interrupted seconds later by the sound of a nearby door bursting open, making him turn to see the boy with the filled sock-bag looking back at a him with a face of worry before letting out an outcry of distress.

"Double D!"

In another house, a third young male shorter than the previous two was in his bedroom, shoving things into a suitcase hastily, bearing the same amount of panic the first boy had. It was only a second or so later when he tried to close the suitcase but was unable to do so with it being overstuffed. Eventually, he succeeded in closing the suitcase but now it was too heavy for him to lift before the case suddenly burst open, scattering the contents everywhere.

The silence that fell afterwards was short-lived as sudden banging came from the bedroom's back door that lead to outside. This immediately terrified the young man as he grabbed a nearby vacuum cleaner and attempted to pull a falsetto voice.

"Um, my little Eddy's not home right now!"

Unfortunately, the boy's attempt at imitating his mother to try and deceive whoever was at the door was in vain as the door suddenly swung open.

"DON'T HURT ME!" The boy screamed in terror before diving behind the cleaner, unaware that the banging had come from the basement dwelling boy who rushed in.

"Trouble! Bad!" The boy repeated again before tripping over the same vacuum cleaner the shorter boy was hiding behind, making the former land onto the latter.

"It wasn't my fault, I swear!" The shorter boy had his eyes clenched shut with fear as he pleaded before opening them and realising who it actually was as his fearful expression turned to one of frustration.

"Ed, you idiot! I thought it was those sore losers!"

"What do we do, Eddy?! What do we do?!" The tall boy referred to as 'Ed', asked still in panic whilst the shorter boy, Eddy tried to pack up again.

"What happened to Sockhead?" Ed was quick to answer Eddy's question by reaching into his sock-bag and pulling out the boy that had been attempting to write a goodbye note. Eddy shoved the suitcase into said boy's hands who looked at it briefly, before losing his composure completely.

"WE'RE FUGITIVES, EDDY! Are you aware of the consequences we're about to endure? All because of our misguided chicanery?!" The boy Eddy referred to as 'Double D' or 'Sockhead' yelled in severe intensity.

That was when the three saw it. A shadow passing by the closed blinds of Eddy's bedroom window which was what brought the kids back into a full-blown panic.

"Too late! Quick, my brother's room!" Eddy instructed as he and the other two raced out of the former's room and down the hall, skidding to a halt as they came across the front door to Eddy's home. Something was banging on it, trying to get in, but Eddy quickly directed his two friends upstairs just before the door gave way and swung open. The three boys rushed down an upstairs hallway before stopping at a door.

Eddy slowly turned the knob before creaking the door open and peeking inside, finding the room vacant, he proceeded inside.

"Eddy, do you think this is wise?" Double D spoke out, concern lacing his tone whilst Eddy rummaged through a closet.

"They'll never find us in here!" Eddy brashly reassured before grabbing Ed's tongue and wiping it on the room door, coating it in saliva before crudely slapping a piece of wallpaper on it, the design of it matching the wallpaper that surrounded the door before shoving himself and his friends inside before closing the door.


The lights inside the room flashed open as Eddy secured the door with the many locks it was home to before he, Ed and Double D all huddled together in the centre of the room, hoping that the storm they were dreading would pass by them.

"This is your fault, Sockhead!" Eddy hissed at Double D in a whisper to avoid attracting any unwanted attention from the outside.

"My fault? Funny, isn't it, how it's always my fault when yet another of your amazing scams goes awry!" Double D whispered back, infuriated that Eddy was putting all the blame on him.

"Yeah, well, I didn't see you stop me! You shoulda known it would go bad!" Eddy quickly retorted, trying to back up his accusation.

"Boy, did it go bad." Ed mumbled anxiously when all of a sudden, the three heard creaks and some noises outside the door. Eddy noticed a congratulatory glass from Peach Creek Diner before shoving Double D towards the bolted door, handing him the glass and gesturing him to use it to listen to which Double D did so, placing the glass against the door and his ear against said glass while Eddy stashed himself inside one of Ed's pockets.

All three of them were sweating bullets as they listened for any noise outside that may be evidence that whatever was searching for them was just outside the room they were taking refuge in. Suddenly, a loud crunch was heard, making Double D and Eddy look to see Ed nervously eating a piece of toast that had fallen off of Double D's back. Unfortunately, that was what attracted the storm as seconds later, the door started to buckle violently as something began to pound on it.

"We are not long for this world!" Ed yelled, panic once again in his voice as he and his two friends ran around the room in desperate hope of finding shelter or an escape route.

"The window!" Double D suggested as he rushed over to said window that was currently closed by curtains and parted them, only to find that instead of glass, the window was filled with bricks.

"What's with my brother and these stupid bricks?!" Eddy said in frustration before he and Double D ended up stumbling backwards and tripping over a rug on the floor which rolled up, revealing a vent.

"Eddy, look! This heat vent will lead to an escape!" Double D pointed out while Ed was sitting on a model of a blue camel.

"Over here, guys! My lumpy mutated horsie will save us!"

Right after Ed had said that, a wooden board that had been used to barricade the door gave way and broke apart as a foot suddenly kicked through the doorknob.

"Eddy! The door won't hold on for much longer!" Double D exclaimed whilst Eddy was trying in vain to rip off the grate that was covering the vent.

"Don't just stand there! Do something!" Eddy instructed. Double D held onto Eddy as the two pulled hard as they possibly could to work the grate loose.

"Giddy-up, horsie! Do not let your mutated lump slow you down!" Ed pleaded as he was now rocking on the camel, trying to get it to run. However, he had ended up rocking the camel too much, which resulted in him being flung off said camel and slamming against the wall behind it.

Eddy and Double D meanwhile had finally pulled the grate off and Eddy was the first to dive into the now open vent.

"More bricks, Double D!" Eddy said in despair as he found that the vent had also been bricked up to their dismay when the two were suddenly grabbed by Ed who dragged them to the wall he had slammed into.

"Ooh ooh ooh! This-a-way, guys! Look" Ed held up the two other Eds, making them face a fire alarm glass box with something written on it which Edd proceeded to read.

"In case of fanfiction, break glass?"

"Bingo! My bro's always prepared!" Eddy said with hope before grabbing the provided hammer and swung it at the alarm, breaking the glass in the process. He then reached inside the now opened case and pulled out it's contents.

"A peanut?"

"Cheap fanfic."

Eddy and Ed said respectively as an arm reached through the space where the doorknob used to be before reaching down and lifting one of the bolts loose, making the door a little more ajar as the storm the Eds were dreading was revealed to be a mob of enraged neighbourhood kids.

"Lemme through! End of the line, dorks!" One of the angry kids said as he and the others continued to strain to get into the room.

"It was just a scam, Double D! How did it go so wrong?!" Eddy questioned in despair, beginning to fear that they were now done for.

"Eddy, the laws of probability can be a real mean-" Edd was about to explain when Ed suddenly interrupted, holding the peanut with his teeth.

"Just my mouth!" Ed bit down on the peanut, the brute force of his teeth making the nut crack and shatter, revealing a key.

"Eddy! A key!"

"It must be for my brother's car!" Edd and Eddy commented respectively before the latter hastily scrambled himself and his two friends into a car that rested in the corner of the room as he made for the driver's seat, despite Double D's protest of either of them being too young to drive. Eddy tried desperately in vain to get the car into ignition with the key. When he finally did so, the engine did nothing but barely give a cough. He tried again only for the engine to splutter once more.

And to rub salt in the wounds, the last few poundings was all the door could take as one of the kids of the mob crashed through, leaving the door now as a heap of splinters.

"Rolf's vengeance will be slow and painful, like Papa's charcoal anecdotes, Ed-boys!" The kid whom referred to himself as Rolf threatened before advancing towards the three boys in question, followed by three others, one of which carried a plank of wood with a crudely drawn face on it. All Eddy and Double D could do was scream in horror as they anticipated the thrashing they were sure to receive. Ed however, who had been sitting in the back seat stared with a determined look.

"I AM ED! CHEESE AND MACARONI!" Ed exclaimed before plunging his feet through the car's metal floor and racing forward, some of the kids having grabbed onto the front of the car as it crashed through the doorway and out through the second floor, sailing outside in the process. The impact the car had against the wall managed to shake the kids off of the car as it raced away from the kids as quickly as possible, smashing through a fence in the progress, courtesy of Ed.

"Peel your onions, Ed-boy, and cry. There is no escaping the son of a shepherd!" Rolf declared as he summoned a pig which he rode on in hot pursuit of the Eds. Two of the other kids quickly following behind him.


"I think I'm gonna be sick!" Double D exclaimed, the shaking of the car as a result of Ed trundling it down the road was taking it's toll on him.

"Not in my brother's car, you're not!" Eddy protested before the plank of wood that one of the kids was holding tumbled onto the wind-shield, making all three Eds scream in horror. Ed, scared out of his mind ended up swerving the car, which almost hit the kid that was holding the hunk of wood who called out to it with "Let 'em have it, buddy!"

The swerving of the car caused it to land on the fences bordering a lane. The Eds inside were completely unaware however that Rolf was catching up to them and was just inches away from the car's rear. Eddy meanwhile looked out the window, his eyes bulging as he found the wheels to just be barely staying on top of the fence. One false move, they will surely fall to their probable deaths.

"So much undone! Unsaid! Mother and Father will be so annoyed!" Double D said despairingly before Ed suddenly yelped in pain as Rolf had just managed to clamp down on one of Ed's legs with his teeth and started to back up, causing Ed to slowly slip out.

"They got me, guys! I'm a goner! Save yourselves! Don't forget about me!" Ed exclaimed before his head soon vanished under the hole of the car's floor.

"See ya." Was all Ed said as he finally lost his grip and began to fall to his possible demise.

"ED!" Eddy and Double D however weren't ready to lose their friend yet as they quickly reached out from the same hole and grabbed an arm each and painstakingly pull Ed back into the car, resulting in a brief game of tug of war between Eddy and Double D and Rolf. The latter eventually lost as Ed's leg slipped out of his teeth, the car at this point reached the end of the fence and flew out over a dumpster.

"Curse you, Ed-boys!" Rolf yelled before slamming face first into the dumpster, the car now with all three Eds inside once again charging into the following woods, smashing through many trees in the process before sailing over a ravine and into the junkyard where it finally landed onto solid ground, Ed quickly resuming his position as the car's motor and running across the ravine once more.

The Eds were barely given any room to breathe however as something slammed the car on the left, sending them shaking and skidding. Eddy looked out the window to find that it was coming from one of the other kids, Kevin who had just caught up to them on his bike as he slammed into the car two more times, the third time making it spin in circles before leaping off a mountain of trash like a ramp and landing back on two wheels of one side. Eddy ended up being thrown out of the open window in the process, but still had his grip on the steering wheel, having to run with the car. Thankfully, Ed opened the door and spun the steering wheel, pulling Eddy back inside as the car broke through another fence and into a construction site of estate buildings where it wrecked through some of the incomplete structures.

"Double D! You got any bright ideas?!" Eddy called out to Edd who sat next to him on the front passenger seat, only to find the latter vomiting into a paper bag. The left door suddenly ripped open as the three found Kevin glaring down at them with a sinister smirk.

"How do you like your faces? Fried or scrambled?" Kevin asked as Rolf, having rejoined the chase began to reach them.

"Rolf will assist you with the Ed-boy flogging, Kevin!" Rolf shouted before grabbing the pig he was still riding on as they rolled forward towards the car like a wheel.

Ed meanwhile managed to tear the car away from Kevin and shut it as Eddy locked it and immediately started to roll up the window. Kevin however leaped off his bike and onto the car and attempted to grope for them. The Eds looked up and saw the tail of Rolf's pig going through the roof of the car like a bottle opener before the roof was ultimately torn open as the Eds were now face to face with the angry kids.

"Time for payback!"

"Plank wants first crack at 'em!"

"Rolf will use their hides as a crutch for Nana's goiter!"

"Like, thanks for the help up here, guys? Duh!"

"It wasn't me, Eddy did it!" Ed quickly protested before hiding in his jacket.

"In your dreams! It was Double D!" Eddy immediately passed the bucket onto Edd with an anxious grin before hiding into Ed's sleeve. Double D was about to say something until he noticed that they were approaching a playground.

"Um, excuse me, I'll be right back." Edd said before reaching out of the window on his side and grabbing onto the merry-go-round. The centrifugal force from how fast the car was going beforehand took it's toll as seconds later, the roof of the car finally tore off with the other kids in tow as they flew away from the car. At this point, the pressure on Edd was too much as he finally let go, causing the car to fly into the sky over the woods, as Kevin could only run a few feet after them before stopping with an iron pipe in his hand before letting out a scream of rage.

"DOOOOORRRRRKKKKKKKSSSSSS!"

The car was still sailing through the air as Eddy looked through the back window, seeing no sign of the mob after them.

"Gracious, Eddy! What is that blinding light we are hurtling towards?!" Edd suddenly yelled in shock, grabbing Eddy's attention as he looked back forward to see that they were zooming towards what looked like a white fissure in the sky that was sparkling with what looked like stars.

"THE PORTAL TO THE UNKNOWN SPACE BEYOND HAS BECKONED US!" Ed said aloud as he and the other two Eds could do nothing but scream as the car got closer and closer into the light until they and the car were engulfed in nothing but pure white.