Zay's P.O.V.

Riley has been gone for a while now and things are finally chilling out. I still hang out with Smackle and Farkle more than I hang out with Lucas and Maya, but we don't totally avoid them now. I also have made more friends outside our original group.

I still miss Riley and I do regret the choices I made, but I have come to realize after being mad at Lucas, Maya, myself, and the world that this is not what Riley wants for us. She is hurt and needs time and space, which is understandable. She would not want us blaming each other or ignoring each other.

The truth of the matter is we are all to blame not just Lucas and Maya. Any one of us could have told Riley or given them an ultimatum to tell her and we didn't. Being mad at each other isn't going to change anything. None of us are as close as we used to be and I don't know if we ever will be, but I think we are slowly letting go of blaming each other.

I hope where ever Riley is she found everything she wants there and I'm sure she will. Riley is capable of so much when she is given the opportunity to make her own choices. She is not as fragile as they thought she was. I thought she was at times too, but someone fragile wouldn't take this big of a step on their own.

She is brave, smart, funny, kind, and just so many other things. She is just amazing and I hope she comes back one day and gives us a chance to be friends again. Even though we all know it won't ever be like it was before, it would still be nice to have Riley in my life in some sort of capacity.

I am taking her advice to heart and working hard in all my classes to get the best grades I can possibly get. She has always told me how capable I am when I put in the work and she is right. I am doing awesome in college right now.

Lucas and Maya have hung out with us a couple times recently. It wasn't how it used to be, but it wasn't completely terrible either. I think we all know Riley would want us to try to keep our friendship alive. We are all growing and moving forward and hopefully one day we can show our growth to Riley.