Chapter 5
H&H Become J&P Potter

Tuesday, 23rd July, mid-morning
Still in Ragnok's office, Gringotts

Antonia the angel beckoned older Harry and older Hermione to her. The angel placed a hand on each of their heads, then said, "Transform."

Harry saw that Hermione started out the same height as Antonia, but Hermione grew three inches taller. In the chest, Hermione's breasts grew and grew—not quite to Susan Bones size, but now Hermione's chest was much fun to look at.

On Hermione's head, her bushy brown hair changed color to a buttery blond, and lengthened two inches; her hair almost straightened, becoming wavy instead of bushy. Her cheekbones bulged out in front, and her chocolate-brown eyes lightened and shifted color to pale blue.

Hermione now looked like a Playboy centerfold—a Playboy centerfold who was now, for some reason, staring at Harry.

Harry realized that he was no longer the same height as Hermione and Antonia; he now was looking down on Hermione and Antonia—and seeing them clearly, with no glasses on his face.

Blond Hermione grinned at Harry and said, "Ah declare, John, you now are blue-eyed and tall and muscular. You are most handsome."

Then Hermione looked at Antonia in confusion. "Ah can't call John 'John'—Ah mean, Ah can call him 'John,' but Ah can't call him 'John'—blast it!"

Harry grinned at the new blonde with the Southern accent. "I bet it's a safety feature built into the magic, so we don't speak the wrong name by mistake."

Harry now was speaking with an American accent. Somehow Harry knew he was speaking with a Nebraska accent.

Harry continued, "So relax—"

Harry tried to say Hermione. But right then his mouth disobeyed his brain, and addressed Hermione's new form as Paulina.

Now Harry pointed a finger at blond Hermione and asked, "Where are you from, gorgeous Paulina?"

She replied, "Ah'm from Jawja," Georgia. "And may Ah say, John Pottah, it is strange to hear mahself talk like thiyis."

"No argument there, Paulina Moffitt," Harry said. "Now I sound like one of those characters on American TV shows."

Hermione gave Harry a smoldering look, which she had never done before—not even in the tent. "Paulina" said, "Looking lahik you do now, John Pottah, you could be the star of one of those American TV shows. Your chestnut rat's-nest Pottah hair and your piercing blue eyes makes you look lahik a bad boy."


AUTHOR'S NOTE: Having shown you how "Paulina" speaks, I will stop the phonetic spelling of her words and will resume proper spelling. However, I will continue to spell any words that are associated with either "John" or "Paulina" with American spellings, not British spellings.


John and Paulina's American-accented flirtation was interrupted by Antonia the angel: "Harken, O chosen one of prophecy, John George Potter formerly Harry James Potter: Seek out first the diary-horcrux at Malfoy Manor. Yes, this is a daunting task, but you can do it, for you have many times proven yourself to be brave and clever. Apparate to coordinates A7C3x52B7 07B9x942A 0000x0000, and you will find the means to complete this task."

John said, "You want me to waltz into the heavily warded place where Lucius Malfoy lives, grab the evil diary, then stroll out again. Sure, easy, no problem."

Paulina hugged him.

Antonia held out her hand, palm up. "Your Ollivander wands on yonder desk and in your wand holsters now are Walton wands. Here are documents you need, to 'prove' you are John Potter and Paulina Moffitt." Light flashed, then several papers and parchments were resting on her flat hand.

John took the papers; then he and Paulina glanced through them. The papers were school transcripts from Ilvermorny, for six years of schooling for John and Paulina that each ended in June 1990; the O.W.L. scores for John and for Paulina; heritage tests for John and for Paulina; and other papers. John glanced at the O.W.L. scores for John Potter—they looked exactly the same as what Harry Potter had scored in 1996, except that John had not scored a "Troll" in History of Magic!

Included in the paperwork were birth certificates. John's and Paulina's new birthdates were July 1, 1973 and September 20, 1972 respectively.

John said to Antonia, "Just to be clear: My new birth certificate says I wasn't 'born as the seventh month dies'; but the Prophecy still applies to me."

Antonia replied, "Yes, you still are 'the one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord.' You were given that 1 July birthday so that the Meddlesome One would not bother you unduly."

Then Antonia said, "To carry your new documents, you need something to carry those documents in." Light flashed, and hanging from Antonia's hand was Hermione's beaded handbag that had been charmed with space-expansion charms, as well as—John could not begin to guess all the charms that Hermione had laid on that bag.

Paulina squealed. "Thank you, Antonia, you are most kind!" Paulina hugged the angel, then (as soon as Paulina took the handbag) she hugged the handbag too, before dropping the new documents into the handbag.


"Finally," said Antonia, "John Potter needs money." Light flashed, and a Gringotts key appeared on a corner of Ragnok's desk. "This is a Gringotts New York vault key, registered to John G Potter, with a current balance of G103." Antonia looked at Ragnok. "Gringotts New York records will show the vault as being active since July 1984."

Ragnok blinked in surprise.

"I go now," Antonia said. " 'John' and 'Paulina,' be brave and clever, and follow the plan, then you will not fail."

Paulina nodded. "It's a good plan."

John said, "Um, Antonia, I have a question. When Paulina and I have destroyed Voldemort, I don't see any alternative than for Paulina and I to 'return' to Ilvermorny, bringing Harry with us. How can this work? According to the papers you've given us, we've each completed six years at Ilvermorny, but neither of us has actually been there. Nobody at that school knows us. Won't all these magically-created lies"—John gestured towards Paulina's beaded handbag—"be exposed when we go to Ilvermorny?"

Antonia replied, "The students and professors at Ilvermorny now have a few vague memories of you, but those memories are that both of you were 'quiet'—Fay Dunbar quiet. The people at Ilvermorny will recognise your names, and will recognise your faces if shown photos, but will tell anyone who asks that you two kept to yourselves."

Antonia looked at Paulina. "Any other questions?"

John smiled cruelly. "When you return to Eternity, would you please tell the 1991 version of Thanatos that Grim Reaper Gerhardus von Schiffer has Harry Potter's file when he shouldn't have it? Thank you."

Antonia nodded. Then, with a flash of light, the angel vanished.


John said, "As curious as I am where those Apparation Coordinates go to, I'd much prefer to go to Gringotts New York and we get married right now."

Ragnok asked, "Do you plan to claim your Potter Head of House ring before or after you marry? Underneath your new look, you're still Harry Potter, age seventeen; I'm sure Magic will let you claim the Lord Potter ring."

John shook his head. "Won't work. I'm supposedly the American second cousin of the Potter Heir, from a cadet branch of the Potter family—I can't claim the Potter Head of House ring without 'blowing my cover.' However, I believe the Potter family magic will let me claim the Potter Regent ring."

Paulina said, "John, sugar, how about we wait on that? The instant you become the Potter Regent, you'll replace Professor Dumbledore as Harry's magical guardian, and I'm sure the Bearded Meddler will be sent letters."

Ragnok's grin showed pointed teeth. "There is nothing that any of us can do about when the Ministry would send Dumbledore a letter, but as for Gringotts?"

Ragnok bellowed then, in Goblinspeak, and a young, unarmed goblin ran in. Ragnok gave an order that included the words Dumbledore Albus. The young goblin briefly replied, then bowed himself out of the room.

Ragnok grinned. "There we go. The same meddlesome wizard who has schemed that young Harry Potter never gets Gringotts owl-post, now himself will be sent no Gringotts owl-post till I say so."

Ragnok looked at John and Paulina. "In the meantime, I'll remove five hundred galleons from the Potter family coinage vault. This, and your supposed seven-year-old Gringotts New York key, should do you well enough until you claim the Regent ring." A bag of coins appeared in the center of Ragnok's desk.

Ragnok handed the Gringotts New York key and the sack of coins to John, who handed them to Paulina, who put them in her beaded handbag.


Ragnok wrote a brief note in Goblinspeak, then signed the note, then use the point of an ornate dagger to cut his own finger, then dripped three drops of blood onto the note. Ragnok handed the note to John.

On Ragnok's desk, during the entire meeting, were the two wands that Older Harry Potter had given to the goblin teller, when Older Harry first had spoken with the teller. Now Ragnok gave these two wands back—to John Potter. John Potter noticed that the wands looked different—they were Walton wands now, not Ollivander wands. John restowed the wands in his two wand holsters.

After this, Ragnok escorted John and Paulina to a room of the bank that few wizards ever saw: it was for Gringotts employees' international Portkeys.

Less than half a minute later, John and Paulina were in Gringotts New York. John promptly handed Ragnok's note to a goblin.


Ten minutes later
Somewhere in Gringotts New York

John and Paulina were standing in a room with a stone floor, a stone ceiling, and four stone walls; though the stone wall in front of John and Paulina was almost completely filled with a stained-glass window.

In the room with John and Paulina were two goblins, acting as witnesses; two human curse-breakers, acting as witnesses; and a third human curse-breaker, acting as officiant. The marriage ceremony was brief and to the point.

When the officiant said, "You may kiss the bride," John did so. The resulting glow was bright enough that everyone in the room except for John and Paulina had to cover their eyes.

John felt something on his left hand. He discovered that he and Paulina now were each wearing a Potter wedding ring.


It took another half-hour before Gringotts New York received the official paperwork from the USA's Ministry of Magic that stated that John George Potter and Paulina Priscilla Moffitt were married in Gringotts New York.

By then, Gringotts New York had drawn up applications for two magical passports, for John Potter and Paulina Potter. These passport-applications were promptly Portkeyed to the USA's Ministry of Magic.

It took yet another hour before the USA Ministry owled official magical passports to John and Paulina at Gringotts New York.

John stared at his passport photo. The face in the photo did not talk or move around; but since the photo was magical, soon the eyes blinked.

And what eyes they were! The John Potter in the photo had cobalt-blue eyes—eyes that were as striking in their own way as the green eyes that Harry had had till earlier today.

The John Potter in the photo had the notorious Potter rat's-nest hair, but now that hair was chestnut-brown. In fact, John Potter's hair was the same color that Hermione's hair had been before her transformation.

Most shocking of all: the face in his passport-photo had no trace of a forehead scar. The photo's face wore no glasses.

Paulina, who had been staring at her own passport photo, said, "I declare, John, you should've warned me I'm now a stone fox!"

John grinned at his bride. "Yeah, if Hugh Hefner met you now, he'd offer you one of his notorious one-month modeling contracts."

John then pointed out to Paulina that, according to his passport, his birthday was July 1, 1973. John asked Paulina, "Do you realise what this means?" Grinning John answered his own question: "First, it means that I'm a legal adult in the nonmagical world, so can adopt Harry in the nonmagical world. But also it means that, if Dumbledore sneaks a look at my passport, no way will he consider me to be 'born as the seventh month dies.' I'm under his radar now."

All these services by Gringotts New York had cost John galleons; still, the sack of coins was not even close to running empty, and his Gringotts New York key was untouched (except for identification). John spent another thirty galleons for him and Paulina to be Portkeyed from Gringotts New York to the magical section of JFK Airport.

At JFK Airport's magical section, for two hundred galleons, John rented an international Portkey to send him and Paulina to the magical section of Heathrow Airport in London.

At Heathrow Airport, John and Paulina presented their magical passports at Magical Britain Customs, and officially entered Great Britain—as Americans.

They immediately returned to Gringotts London, to pay another visit to Ragnok.

Ragnok drew up a document for the Granger parents to sign, stating that they consented to Priscilla P. Moffitt Potter, their daughter's supposed age-eighteen magical second cousin, becoming Hermione's magical guardian. John and Paulina expected nobody at Hogwarts to object to such a document when it was filed with them—quite the opposite, in fact.

The time now was 2:42 in the afternoon, London time. The Granger parents were still at work; and John and Paulina did not plan to visit young Harry Potter till tomorrow.

What to do in the meantime? What to do?

John called for Greyclay, the Potter head house-elf, and the newlywed couple was elf-popped to Potter Manor.

"What is Potter Manor's condition?" John then asked.

Greyclay's answer: One part of the manor house was ruined, and the wards were down; but other than this, the manor house was livable.

John and Paulina exchanged bawdy smiles, then John asked, "The 'livable' part includes the Potter Library?"

"Yes."

Newlyweds John and Paulina consummated their marriage on a rug in the Potter Library.

The Potter ancestor-portraits who witnessed this activity all were scandalized—except for Portrait-Lily, who called out, "Don't forget the Cushioning Charm!"


AUTHOR'S NOTE: Why did I make transformed Harry and Hermione look the way they do?

Transformed Harry must not only have the Potter name, but he also must "look like a Potter." It's canon that all the Potter men have the rat's-nest hair; but I decided that John Potter, who supposedly is only distantly related to Harry, would not need glasses as do James Potter and Harry Potter. Of course for the "John Potter" disguise to work, John must have no trace of a forehead scar; nor can the young man have green eyes when he supposedly is not related to Lily Evans.

As for "Paulina Moffitt," she supposedly is descended from Ramses Malfoy, who presumably had straight blond hair. I gave Paulina half of that: Paulina's hair is blond and wavy.

Still, this gave me many options about how "John" and "Paulina" could look. So why did I make them be "Brad and Angelina" attractive? Because in future chapters, when "Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived" and Hermione Granger are at Hogwarts as first-years, and "John" and "Paulina" are there as seventh-years, I wanted for John and Paulina, not Harry, to draw everyone's attention. John, the former Boy Who Lived, and Paulina, the former Brightest Witch of Her Age, can handle being in the spotlight, whereas for the two eleven-year-olds, being the centre of several hundred students' attention is a deep shock. This is my way to draw attention away from young Harry and young Hermione.

Also, I wanted to make sexism work for me. Canon implies that not only is Hermione smarter than everyone else in her year, but Hermione is, for all the years of her Hogwarts schooling, the smartest student in the school. By making Paulina be as attractive as a Veela, nobody will notice that Paulina is as intelligent as young Hermione.