After a rambunctious water fight between Noct and Prompto ended with a soaked Ignis and a furious Gladio, they arrived at the cape by the late afternoon. Talcott and Iris waved at them from the bright red truck stand as the regalia pulled in.
"Gladdy!" Iris greeted with a large smile. She noticed Ignis in the backseat, head resting on Noct's lap as the other exited the car.
"Is he okay?" She looked worried as Noct pulled the man up into a sitting position. Ignis' head lolled back, exposing his neck.
"Not dead," Noct clarified. "Just sleeping."
"No kidding," Talcott snorted, poking Ignis in the cheek. Noct blinked, wondering when the boy had gotten in the car from the other side. He bat his small hand away when he tried to poke Ignis again.
"You guys are pretty late," Iris commented as she helped take a bag from the trunk. "I thought you guys were going to be here hours ago."
"We had a late start in the morning," Gladio grumbled, still sore about the morning water fight. The shield pulled Ignis up and out of the car to carry him.
"Well I made you guys some sandwiches in case you're hungry."
"Thanks Iris," Prompto said with a grin as he carried a box of supplies.
The group made their way up the hill to the safe house. Regis used the house as a hideout in his prince days and was now a means of shelter for Iris and the others. It reminded Noct that he wasn't the only one affected by the war. Everyone lost just as much as he did. Gladio, Prompto and Ignis too. They just hid it better. He wondered if Ignis had ever gotten in touch with his uncle. Or if Prompto ever got a response to the rattled voicemail he overheard him leave his dad's inbox one night when Prompto thought he was alone. He shook those thoughts away, swallowing a lump of grief and guilt as they approached the house that needed too much work.
The last time they visited, Iris had started a small farming patch near the lighthouse where they planted some carrots and other vegetables. Noct wondered how they were doing despite not having an interest in eating them.
"Your highness," Monica and Dustin greeted him with a salute as they walked inside.
Noct scratched the back of his head, feeling awkward as he held onto his duffle bag.
"Hey," he replied, feeling lame. He just wanted them to act normal around him.
"Ah, is that our patient?" Dustin asked curiously as he went over to Gladio. He combed Ignis' bangs back to take a good look at his face.
"I bet the young man would appreciate a nice clean up," he suggested. Now that he mentioned it, Ignis was starting to look a little worse for wear. "Let's take him upstairs, shall we?"
Gladio nodded, hoisting Ignis up to get a better grip of him as Talcott followed behind carrying Ignis' bag. Noct almost followed behind them when he felt someone tap his shoulder.
"Aren't you going to eat?" Iris asked with a grin.
"O-oh, sure," he said, placing his bag down. He followed her to the dining table where a spread of sandwiches and drinks awaited them.
"This looks delicious! Thanks Iris!" Prompto thanked as he flopped into one of the chairs.
She giggled. "Help yourself, there's plenty."
"Hands," Monica admonished Prompto with a light slap on his hand as he reached for a sandwich. The blond pretended to look hurt but got up nonetheless as she led them to the kitchen sink where they could wash their hands before touching their food.
"Gladio got me up to speed on Ignis' condition," she informed them as they took their seats at the table. "I went ahead and ordered a case of extra ethers and potions. They should arrive tomorrow."
"Thank you Monica," Noct said sincerely. "I'll compensate you for that."
"It's no trouble at all," she said, shaking her head. "If this spell is indeed feeding on his magical energy then we should try to replenish it for as long as possible."
"We brought a few extra potions and ethers just in case," Prompto pointed to the box he set down earlier.
"We also got a heart monitor and blood pressure machine on loan from the clinic at the hunter's post," Noct added. "But I'm not sure what other equipment we might need or where to get it from."
"I doubt you could just waltz into some hospital and ask to buy random equipment," Iris brought up.
"They'll want to know who you are and why you want it in the first place if you go directly to a hospital," Monica concluded. "Unfortunately, things after the attack haven't been great. Any major hospitals are currently overrun with Insomnian refugees, Lestallum General being one of them."
A part of Noct was glad they didn't take Ignis to Lestallum but the rest of him felt the grip of guilt slowly beginning to squeeze around his throat. Those were his people suffering, who were displaced and abandoned.
"And I doubt we want to tip anyone off that someone in our core group is down if you reveal who you are in order to get any equipment," Prompto reasoned.
Monica was silent for a moment to think. Heavy footsteps alarmed everyone to Gladio's presence as he came down and joined them.
"Iggy's getting cleaned up," he informed everyone as he grabbed a drink. "So what's up?"
"We're brainstorming where to get medical equipment to help monitor Ignis," Iris informed him.
"I think I have an idea," Monica said. "I have a few connections."
"Cool, sounds shady," Prompto said, impressed.
"Since the fall of Insomnia, the city's been overrun with monsters and wildlife from the outside. It's been pretty much desolated and very few survivors remain."
Noct looked down at his half-eaten food, his appetite now diminished.
"However, what little crownsguard survived have ventured in to procure supplies and search for any survivors. I can get in contact with one of them and arrange for a supply run."
"Why do I feel a catch coming on?" Prompto asked.
"They charge a high premium," Monica revealed. "They're crownsguard, not kingsglaive."
"They aren't connected to the king and don't have the luxury of using magic like a glaive would. They're fighting on raw skill and strength alone," Noct explained.
"Exactly, it's a high-risk low-reward situation. The dangers they face are already difficult even if they were glaives, that's how powerful the enemies are. If they're going to risk their lives, they will charge an arm and a leg for their services."
"But isn't that kind of bad? They're monopolizing their services and price gouging, right?"
"Well doing it out of the kindness of their hearts isn't going to fill their stomachs," Gladio said. "You have to understand that Insomnia has fallen. The government, the economy-everything. These guys aren't on payroll so they have to make do to survive out here."
Noct nodded. "They'll be risking their lives doing something they don't have to. I'll compensate within reason."
"Why can't we do it? Remove the middle men." Prompto suggested.
"Yes, let's take our future king, the last of his bloodline back home where we're outnumbered and outgunned by imperial guards and ridiculously strong monsters to scavenge for equipment we don't know anything about let alone ever seen before."
Prompto frowned. "I don't like it when you're sarcastic. I'm not spooning you tonight."
Gladio rolled his eyes.
"So, I'm guessing we'll be heading out to do jobs then?" Gladio said, turning his attention to Noct as he ignored Prompto.
"Not like we have a choice. If I could withdraw the funds from my bank account, I would." He'd sink every penny of his money if he had to. "We'll make it work."
"Alright," Monica affirmed with a nod. "I'll contact them in the morning. In terms of equipment, we'll need something that measures and monitors the rate his magic depletes as well as any first aid materials. If you think of anything else we might need, make a list and I'll go over it."
"Sounds good," Noct said in agreement.
"Nice, we're officially mercs for hire!" Prompto cheered. "Wonder if we can charge a premium for our services."
"They'd probably pay extra not to hear that mouth of yours," Gladio snorted.
"Oh yeah?" Prompto challenged. "They'd probably pay extra to-to, um…" he struggled to come up with a zinger. "Cut that mullet of yours," he said, raising his hand up and expecting a high-five.
"Get it? Because his mullet is the source of his power?" Prompto explained as Gladio fought a laugh.
Monica raised an eyebrow. Iris looked away, embarrassed for him. Noct looked down and picked at his sandwich.
Prompto pouted, sad that they left him hanging and high-fived himself.
After lunch, everyone gathered upstairs to stare at Ignis sleeping. Dustin took care of everything from changing his catheter bag to cleaning him up and giving him a nice shave. Ignis was dressed down into a shirt and some shorts. He looked immensely better than before, cleaner and almost happy. Noct guessed that camping and lugging his unconscious body about without much care did a number on the guy.
"I can't believe he's just sleeping," Iris marveled as they stood around Ignis.
"This one found a story about a princess with the same condition," Gladio snorted as he jabbed a thumb in Prompto's direction. "She wakes up with a kiss from some prince."
Her eyes widened as familiarity set in.
"I know that one! Sleeping Beauty! She wakes up after finding true love!"
She studied them for a moment, tilting her head. "Did you guys try it?"
The men looked at each other, hesitant to talk.
"Yeah, we did," Noct all but coughed as he scratched the back of his head. "It obviously didn't work."
A grin spread on Iris' lips. "Seriously?" She looked at Ignis and stared at the man with a hint of interest. "Can I try?"
"Absolutely not," Gladio said, shaking his head.
"Why not?" Iris whined. "It can't hurt."
"Because we tried and it didn't work," Gladio explained. "The kiss theory is out."
"Man, Iggy's getting way more play than ever and he's too unconscious to appreciate it," Prompto tsk-tsked, shaking his head.
"What if Iris is his true love and he wakes up?" Talcott asked, looking up at Gladio.
The shield crossed his arms over his chest and scowled. "Then he'll take responsibility."
"Ugh, he would," Noct bemoaned, reluctantly agreeing because Ignis was the perfect gentleman.
"It wouldn't hurt to try," Dustin suggested, "As long as she keeps it short," he said, holding her with a warning stare.
Iris practically squealed her delight as she broke out her bubblegum lip balm to get ready. She applied a generous amount, massaging her lips before making them pop.
Iris leaned down, pressing her lips firmly against Ignis and held the kiss for a few seconds (a few seconds too long in Noct's opinion) and pulled back to wait for a response. They watched in silence as the man continued to sleep.
"Maybe I should add tongue?" she asked, turning to the group for suggestions.
Prompto's eyes lit up. "That's what I was thinking!"
"No!" Noct barked.
Everyone flinched, locking onto Noct who felt his face flush with heat.
Monica cleared her throat, hoping to draw everyone's attention away from the awkward air left behind from Noct's sudden outburst.
"I don't believe the kiss theory holds any water," she began. "Because if it did, it'd be considered a cruel punishment."
"Cruel punishment? How?" Iris asked. "If anything, it's super romantic," she sighed wistfully as she looked back at Ignis.
"Right?" Prompto agreed. "To wake up to the sensuous soft lips of your future lover and soulmate, who you may or may not know," Prompto said with a dramatic flair to his voice. "Having their slug of a tongue in your mouth to wake you from your death like slumber. It's probably disorienting at first, but knowing that they did so out of love and without your full consent is so romーoh wow, it's kind of creepy now that I say it out loud," he concluded.
Monica shook her head. "Consent factor aside, there's also the case of rarity," she pointed out. "If true love's kiss is what should wake Ignis up, then who knows where that person could be."
They obviously weren't there, Noct thought to himself bitterly.
"What if his true love is on the other side of Eos? What if they haven't been born yet? What if they already died? Ignis would be stuck like this forever," she further explained.
The idea was sobering and suddenly Noct felt like an idiot. Why did they ever let that ridiculous theory carry any weight? He felt foolish for entertaining it even if a tiny part of him hoped to be the one to wake Ignis from his death like slumber. He was now glad that they got Sania involved. She was going to find the proper cure and Ignis was going to wake up after they got the antidote.
The sound of footsteps and mumbled cursing interrupted their discussion as the bedroom door swung open and banged against the wall.
"What's going on here? I've been hollering and thought ya'll fell victim to that cat from outside the lighthouse!" Cid complained as he walked in, face scrunched up with annoyance.
Talcott laughed. "That cat is harmless."
"A murder machine is what that thing is," Cid warned. "Demonic in nature and probably eats souls."
His eyes finally settled on Ignis when he stood at the foot of the bed.
"Oh no, did this one die?" he asked, looking to them for answers. "Everyone looks so sad. He died, right?" he shook his head solemnly as he placed a hand on his hip. "Damn it. I could've sworn the blond goofy looking one would've been the first to bite the dust."
"Hey!" Prompto cried, offended.
"Ignis is under a sleeping spell and we're super concerned his soulmate won't be able to kiss him back to life," Iris explained.
"Ignis is in a sleep-like coma and nothing can wake him up," Monica corrected.
"Oh no, not this again," Cid said, rolling his eyes. "This happened to Regis once on our trip twenty years ago."
"Wait," Noct remembered back to the twenty year old file Sania had shown them at the clinic. "That was him?!"
"Yup!" Cid confirmed. "What kind of dumbass loses to an extinct mushroom tree? Damn idiot."
"What did you guys do?" Gladio asked.
Cid cackled. "Drew dicks on his face and took pictures," he said laughing so hard he slapped his knee, having a good time about it. Everyone stared in silence until Cid caught the awkward air of being the only one laughing. He sobered up and coughed, getting back to business.
"Right! How we woke him up." The man scratched his chin, trying to remember. Noct felt his heart pound. If Cid could remember, then maybe Sania could find the cure faster.
"Well, it happened such a long time ago," he said. "You gotta understand I might be a bit spotty. But I do remember that it seemed to mess with his magic. When Regis fell, the barrier around the capital fell so the city was on high alert with glaives and crownsguard stationed around the wall. With him down, we couldn't access the armiger-nothing in or out. It was absolute chaos with Clarus barking orders at home to keep the city safe while trying to get a handle of the situation at hand with Regis snoring himself to death."
Noct listened in horror at the situation being recalled. He couldn't imagine how freaked out everyone was with his dad down for the count. It put into perspective just how important his father was and in turn, how powerful the crystal is. It was responsible for arming their glaives and provided protection against the outside. A simple sleeping spell made the security of the barrier and access to the armiger and its magic useless. What a terrifying ordeal!
"As luck would have it, Weskham and Clarus already had their weapons out in the instance Regis fell. I was the only one shit out of luck because I couldn't get to mine," Cid scowled. "So that left them to go get the cure. I was left behind to babysit Regis here at the hideout. I think the brat stayed behind too. Cor had a sword or something, but I was plenty enough and man enough to protect Regis! Those losers didn't trust me alone with 'im, can you believe that?"
The group chose not to answer. Cid glared at them suspiciously.
"Anyway, your dad wasn't much company while asleep and since I had the brat to keep watch I took to drinkin' and before I knew it I was plastered!" the man exclaimed with a cackle. "I took shots every time Regis snored!"
"My dad snores?"
"Not what I would've taken away from that, buddy," Prompto said, patting Noct's back.
"Son, I almost died of alcohol poisoning!" Cid boasted. "Anywho, the others eventually came back a few days later or whatever. I don't remember, time and space tends to blend when your liver's failing. In the end, Clarus kissed Regis what with being his boyfriend and all so he had first dibs…or was it Cor? Weskham? Regis woke up before I got a turn. I was pissed."
Monica frowned, confused. "So a kiss brought him back? Are you sure?"
"Yup. A big ol' kiss," Cid confirmed. "And it was sloppy too, no technique!" he complained. "And Clarus wasn't satisfied with just one either, the bastard went in for seconds and thirds! I could've done a better job if I weren't already plastered and dry humping a potted plant at the time."
"Dude!" Prompto said, mystified and yet still horrified.
"I'm really big into commitment when I'm drunk," Cid defended. He looked at Noct while pointing at Ignis.
"So, who's gonna mouth violate this one? There a line? Can I have a go? Can I use tongue?" Cid patted his pockets for something. "Hold on, let me get my lip grease."
"We're forgoing the traditional kiss method since there's actually a proper, less invasive cure." Monica said, stepping right in front of Cid to block him from Ignis.
Cid sucked his teeth in disappointment but still applied his lip grease. "Just sayin'" Cid said before popping his lips. Noct shuddered.
"Gladdy?"
Gladio looked a little pale and out of it. Iris poked her brother.
"Well now we know who has to kiss Noct if he ever falls into the deep sleep, huh big guy?" Prompto joked, elbowing Gladio with a mischievous grin.
Gladio's face was a blank mask. "My dad was your dad's-and they were- true love," he said to no one in particular.
Prompto raised an eyebrow. "Your other dad kissed Noct's dad too, probably...and then they had a big ol' dad orgy in which you were conceived."
Gladio wailed his world shattering.
"Whose Gladio's other dad?" Talcott whispered to Iris.
"Cor," she whispered back through the corner of her mouth.
Talcott nodded. It made sense.
"Come on, let's walk it off big guy," Prompto consoled as he took Gladio away.
Noct made his way towards the lighthouse later that night. He found Gladio leaning against the railing staring out into the ocean. The man had been a little out of it since the reveal of their parents' relationship. He'd been quiet throughout dinner too, staying in his head for most of it despite Prompto's attempts at baiting him into conversation.
"Hey," Noct called out announcing his presence. He stood a short distance away from him, copying his stance and leaning against the metal railing.
Gladio acknowledged him with a nod.
The ocean crashed and foamed at the rocks below them. The air was cool and smelled nice, salty and fresh. It reminded Noct of summer vacation and of trips to the freshwater lakes, his father bothered to take him during the handful of times he wasn't busy.
"Monica called her sketchy connect," Noct brought up. "Said that since a lot of the guard are spread out through the territory making ends meet as hunters and helping Cor, a small group is willing to meet us tomorrow morning at the Old Lestallum stop to discuss details."
Gladio grunted in acknowledgement at the news. Noct frowned at the man's lack of enthusiasm.
"You still bent out of shape that our dads might've knocked boots?" Noct asked after a while.
"Our dads did not knock boots," Gladio denied.
"Not the end of the world if they did," Noct sighed. "They were boyfriends."
Gladio broke his stare from the ocean to give Noct a side glace. "You not freaked out by that?"
Noct shook his head. "Not really."
A comfortable silence fell as they listened to the ocean waves crash against the rocks below. The dark blue sky had stark gray clouds dusted through it. The moon tried its best to shine through.
"I'm not knocking your boots," Gladio pointed as he stared out again.
"I'd knock Prompto's boots before I knock yours," Noct retorted.
The shield snorted. "Not Iggy's?"
Noct chose not to answer and instead, looked down at the railing and picked at the chipped paint.
"I'm not grossed out about our dads," Gladio eventually confessed. "I'm just-" he inhaled through his nose. "...surprised and a bit disappointed. Dad used to tell me everything and I thought he loved mom. Why didn't he tell me?" he asked, tipping his head back and closing his eyes.
Noct wasn't as intuitive as Gladio when it came to reading people. He never suspected his father was involved with anyone else after Aulea's passing.
"Maybe their romance ran its course and they both moved on?" Noct eventually reasoned.
Gladio opened his eyes and turned to Noct.
"Dude, my dad was probably banging your dad when I was like three."
"Wait, why is my dad getting banged by yours? If anything, my dad was the banger, not the bang-ee," Noct said.
"Can we not talk about the logistics of them banging?" Gladio pushed off the railing to stand straight. "The point is, they were super close while we were growing up. If they were in a relationship, why hide it? And did my mom know? Was she okay with it? I'm more hurt by the hiding than them banging, regardless of who banged who," he emphasized at the end.
Gladio was right. Why keep it a secret? Was it because of their roles? Regis was king and Clarus was his shield. Noct could understand there being a power imbalance at play if people were to call them out on it. Noct always assumed Clarus was happily married to Gladio's mother, but now that he knew of the relationship what was the truth? Did Noct's mother know? Did she allow it? Were they still together despite their marriages? Or did Noct's father pine for the man in secret because of it? It would explain why his dad never remarried after Aulea died. It didn't matter now. Regis perished when the city fell, Clarus no doubt died while protecting him. They were both gone so any answers about their relationship died along with them.
"Did you talk to Cor?" Noct eventually asked, wanting to change the topic. "Monica tried to but couldn't get him."
"He called me back after I left him a voicemail," Gladio replied. "I explained the situation and the little we got from Cid."
"Any good news?"
Gladio shook his head. "He tried to remember, said something about it being over twenty years ago and then I heard him shudder about Cid's lip grease and the trip being the worst internship ever."
Noct nodded.
"He said he didn't go with dad and Weskham to get the potions so he can't say what was in them or where they came from. He was still the look out when they returned so he didn't get to see Regis wake up. But he confirmed that there was some sort of mouth to mouth action involved from what Cid told him. So yeah, my dad gave your dad the total mouth down and got him to wake up."
Noct frowned. "That doesn't make any sense. So then, what's the cure? The kiss or the potion?"
"Both?" Gladio shrugged. "I'd have to give Sania a call and see what she thinks."
The story about his father was so muddled and full of holes. Why did it add validity to the fairy tale with the kiss? Where exactly did the men get the cure? Why did Cid bring up the fact that Regis and Clarus were lovers at the time? Besides trying to possibly scar Gladio for life, Noct felt that bit of information was important or else why bring it up?
"Maybe for it to work the love needs to be reciprocated?" Noct finally concluded.
Gladio raised an eyebrow. "Seriously?"
"Well, our dads were together."
"Allegedly together," Gladio frowned, crossing his arms over his chest.
Not rolled his eyes. "Fine, they were allegedly boyfriends. Maybe the kiss has to work in tandem with the potion? Because they loved each other, your dad was able to wake my dad up."
"Sounds plausible."
Noct sighed. "If that's true then we're in trouble. Who does Iggy love? He's not very forthcoming when it comes to his private life."
"We could always rub a can of ebony against his lips and see if that wakes him up?"
Noct shot him a glare.
"I don't know Noct," Gladio exasperatedly sighed. "It's plausible but something in my gut tells me that ain't right. I'll let Sania know the new theory and see what she thinks."
Noct hoped Gladio's gut was right. He didn't want to dwell on the possibility of losing Ignis on a technicality outside of their control. He gripped the railing, anxious and angry with himself. How would they even begin to find the man's partner if it came down to it? They had very little to go on after checking Ignis' phone. Nothing pointed to anything personal, as it was all business with the exception of a few mobile games Prompto got him to download. The thought depressed Noct as it drove the point home that he barely knew anything about Ignis. He was a terrible friend to the man.
"It's a good thing we brought Iggy here and not Lestallum," Gladio remarked unexpectedly.
"What?" Noct asked, confused.
Gladio went back to leaning against the railing. "You made a good call for once in your life," he snorted.
"Hey!"
"You stuck to your guns and gave good reasons why to come here instead of Lestallum," Gladio explained further. "Pretty compassionate of you to go out of your way for a fallen comrade. Maybe you really are up to snuff to be King."
Noct blinked, ears burning at the compliment.
"Iggy's more than just a comrade," he confessed and felt his heart pound at the sound of his voice divulging that much information. He swallowed, steadying his nerve. Ignis was important to him, too important, so important that he was afraid to really study why he was so important. "He's family and you know that," Noct finally settled on saying. "I'd do the same for you or Prompto if it came to it."
Gladio grinned.
"He'll wake up," Gladio said, confident. "The true love thing is bullshit. The cure is going to work. He'll wake up even if we have to beat him awake."
Noct chuckled, relaxing a bit.
"I can threaten him with treason if he doesn't," he offered.
Gladio barked a laugh, giving Noct a hearty pat on the back. "Good, light a fire under his ass. I like that."
