Here's your daily dose of delish content, hot and fresh from the brain presses! it had to happen eventually, but this IS a flashback chapter, but even still I think you'll find it palatable. And remember to stick around for my cooking tips at the end of the chapter, I'm sure they'll make you're life so much easier, or at least more flavorful!
Chapter 9: Delicious Leftovers
OR
Tastes Of The Past
It is said, that deep within the dense jungles, lies a temple of an ancient people. This people coveted and worshipped, with all their might, the sweetness, the savory, the uplifting joy, of the cocoa bean. Even now, long after the people have disappeared to the march of history, their mechanisms continue the process of stirring and refining their mixes in the attempt to attain the 'true' form of their 'god'. The Heart of Dark Chocolate! To taste such a thing, would truly be a religious experience.
It had been a day and a half since we set up our bait station, and now I was swarming with minks. Literally in fact. Several were running across my shoulders and arms, one was curled up on top of my head, and seven more had taken to snuggling inside my numerous pants pockets. The perils of being a space-heater, but I didn't mind. After making sure they understood that the groin area was a no-go-zone, it was mostly just getting used to their ticklish little claws and the light dustings of sugar they left in their wake that kept crystalizing along my clothes. Now I had the unenviable task of herding them all into habitat-containers both so nothing would eat them in transit, and that they themselves wouldn't escape and eat something in transit. That had been an embarrassing lesson to learn early on, with the Mamo Mosa fish, but how would you have guessed they'd jump their tanks and drain the entire ships supply of alcohol?
In any case, the process of herding small mammals was around the same difficulty as herding cats, so I mostly let my mind wander as I methodically set about securing the little varmints.
To be precise, I was thinking about my last meal, how...different, I felt in the presence and consumption of the Glacier Ice...and back to the first time I ever felt that way.
(8 Years Ago: Northern Wul Continent)
I might not have been in the Wul Volcano itself, but I was still sweltering in the heat. I was already stripped down to all but my underwear and still it felt like I was in an oven. Which, given that some of my group were huddled around frying eggs on the ground, probably wasn't that far off from the truth. But let's get into how and why I was currently sweating my body weight.
Following the discovery of an actual cooking method for Blueblood Corn by Heavenly King Toriko, code-named BB Corn for sake of ease in recipes, the chef community was thrown into an uproar, sending hundreds to the sizzling hellhole to try and experiment with the ingredient that was previously more obstacle and armor-plating material than food. Other countries, and to a lesser extent the IGO, tried to demand samples or stalks to be sent over for sake of said experimentation, but were quickly boycotted by the nation of Wul, who claimed the mighty grain as a national resource and declared that 'all but the King who discovered this ancient treasure must come to US if they wish to try their luck'. So, the crowds came, and I was part of said crowd. I was, at the time, just a beginning rank Hunter with a sub-class specialization with collection so I could take back non-corn related samples with me.
For all that the BB Corn was a breakthrough centuries in the making, my focus was more on the less...hearty, foliage of Wul. Not the sauce-fruit, which was told to only bloom under a full view of the stars. Not the 7:500 Apples who fermented for years on end atop the trees. No, my main 'goal' as it were...were the salamandrake plants, a massive bush with massive, thick petals that tasted like a finely marbled beef steak, marking it as a prime favorite amongst vegetarians both voluntary or required. The only reason it hadn't been brought into the average market so far, was because without a steady supply of ash in the soil, the plant's petals would be rendered a tasteless, if nutritious, mush. With the newly forming market of Wul however? It would suddenly be much more viable to have it sent over as needed, even if it would be expensive in the early stages.
So, I was mostly there as a forward 'agent', to collect clipping and root samples, along with some soil surrounding the plant so we know roughly what ratios are needed. As a side note though, I DID get to be a guinea pig for some of the more enthusiastic chefs wanting to try out their new possible cooking methods. On the down side, a vast majority of them were really fucking stupid. I still don't understand how that one chef thought I would eat a kernel the size of my head in a single like he wanted me too, even if it had been soaking in a broth pot for a week and a half. The only one I actually enjoyed, and pushed to lay claim too, was a Tortilla this girl, Searsha, made by grinding down BB Popcorn with a pestle, oil, and spices before being baking in a hot rock oven. That, and she rocked a halter-top at the time which my teenage hormones loved, but that was secondary. I'm talking about the important things here, remembering THAT little detail can come later in private, if at all.
Anyway, right, the hunt. It took me...around 5 weeks trekking through jungles and skirting around volcanic areas? Due to the ash the salamandrakes required to sustain themselves, it tended to grow closer to the magma vents, and thus made it one of the main food staples of Magma Rats, outside of each other. And while they weren't really that dangerous temperament-wise, getting bitten or swarmed by them could easily lead to heat stroke or death by dehydration, making it so I had to scout around a fair bit for the right time and place where I either wouldn't interact with them at all, or could safely escape.
It would have been just another experience, requiring a new ingredient to see if we could cultivate and expand on, until the final week. During that week...I found a phoenix.
It was such a small thing, trapped in the maw of some kind of fly-trap with sharp fangs around its lips to seemingly lock together when it closed. I had no idea what it was, what was inside it, but even muffled I could hear its song, its cries for help, and...I just jumped into action. I hacked away at its stem as it was blissfully focused on its meal, pried it open when it finally fell to the ground in a thud of vegetation and sap, and saw...something beautiful.
With vermillion colored plumage, the ends of its feathers ended in dizzying arrays of blue, yellow, and orange, making every breath it took look as if I was staring at a crackling fire. The small talons on it feet that glittered like gold and a small head that looked less like the eagle I would have expected it to be, and more like a little tit-bird. I was mesmerized, and before I even knew what I was looking at, I tried to bring my hand to touch it, only to recoil at the small shower of embers the bird screeched out in warning, flapping a wing wildly that sent them scattering even as the other was noticeably limp.
The fire startled me, and I backed away, but I didn't run. To see a majestic creature like this so hurt, so vulnerable...it didn't sit right with me. A crueler or pragmatic man would take advantage of the weakness, to taste something no-one else ever had or probably ever would, or try and capture it to see if it was breedable, but that...wasn't me. This was something that suffered enough, and I didn't come here to do any harm. I wouldn't, deprive the world of such a wonder just because I could.
I kept my distance, simply staring down at the small bird, even as I winced at hearing its pained cries and twitches when it tried and failed to take off with its limp wing, jumping in the air or leaving small trails of ash as it landed back on the ground. Finally though, I got an idea, fishing into the pockets of the jacket I had tied around my waist, brought along for cover in some of the denser jungle bits, I retrieved some of my rations. A small jar of salsa and some of the salamandrake leaves I had plucked that were too small to last long at all, brought along more-so to snack on than anything.
The phoenix stopped his struggling as I took off the lid on the salsa, obviously smelling the spice, even as I set them both on the ground so it could see what I was doing, slowly and carefully. After that, I took out one of the BB Tortilla's I had been given, made sure it saw me take and eat a piece of it, before spreading the salsa on it and doing the same. Lastly, I placed the leaves on the salsa carefully, before folding it up and, carefully, showing my hands completely clear, stepped away from the newly formed wrap.
The bird was understandably weary, but I could see its little head tilting left and right, its small body rising and falling with its every breath. It took small hops over to the food, glancing up every few seconds as if to check if I would pounce on it, then, upon finally reaching it, hesitantly aimed a single peck down, stabbing into the wrap before bringing itself back up, a small tongue licking at the small drop of salsa that stuck to its beak...
Before I saw it's irises dilate, and it jammed its head down in a blur of sparks as the wrap disappeared down his gullet, not even a single motion of chewing as birds were want to do. He spread his wings wide, and threw his head back, letting loose a shriek as ear-piecing and spine tingling as any Eagle, as it erupted in fire like a flashbang. I was completely unprepared for that, of course, and was justifiably blinded by the intense light, sending me sprawling on my ass, knocking the wind out of me. It wasn't until I actually got my sight back however that I realized the weight on my chest wasn't because of my sudden fall, but rather because of the very visibly glowing birb standing on my chest, staring at me with eyes as warm as a winter's hearth.
I felt none of the heat of the sparks I could see floating off of his wings, none of the dense, moggy heat of the jungle around us. All I felt...was a gentle, warm weight. My hand came up again, and this time met no resistance. His feathers were so soft, so farm and flowing it was impossible for me to tell where one began and another ended, if they even did. For all I knew it somehow had a coat of tangible fire, it wouldn't be the craziest thing the world had cooked up. His little head pushed into my hand, rubbing himself into my palm with cooing trills that despite where we were and the possibility of a predator stumbling upon us at anytime...made me feel, happy. Hopeful. Proud.
This was what I loved about the world, the wonders that I wanted to share with the people. Yes, it was dangerous, yes, there were risks, but moments put everything into perspective. This was a creature that most likely no amount of study or research could recreate in generations, and it was all the greater for it. People lived their whole lives to be the one to experience it...but not you. If it wasn't repeatable, then it wasn't worth it. The memory would be cherished, but life had to go on.
I laid there petting him for what had to be hours, simply listening and watching the little miracle stretch his newly repaired wings and croon, before I got to a sitting position, staring down at the little birb who looked up at me curiously, having moved to the ground in front of my crossed legs as I moved myself upward.
Then, with a much lighter heart, I started making my way back to the camp...only to stop a minute later when I heard the chirping and pitter-patter of feet behind me, turning around to see the small phoenix hopping directly behind me. I shook my head, made a shoeing motion for a moment, then continued walking...for five minutes before I stopped again, the small birb continuing to hop along behind me, looking curiously smug. This continued three more time before I called it quits, leaning against a tree with a hand on my face even as he danced around my feet.
I couldn't let him follow me back to camp, at best someone'd try to stick him a rotisserie or stew pot, at worst they'd take him away from the probable family he had. So, I decided to switch tactics.
I crouched down till I was eye-level with the little mythical creature, eye to shining eye.
"Alright, obviously you want something from me. Is it another meal? Because I'm sorry, I used up all my salsa. So, c'mon, what do you whaaaaaaaa-!" I tried to bargain, stinking out a hand to point only for the phoenix to hop on said hand, and begin to flap its wings. In a flagrant disregard for the laws of physics and mass, the bird maybe a 10th of my size and an 18th my weight had me securely gripped in its tiny talons, leaving me screaming as we soared through the air on its tiny wings, the jungle foliage now just a backdrop to the ground below.
I, of course, after the brief surprise, rolled with the punches.
"FUCK, FUCK, FUCK, HOOOOLLLY SHIT, FUCK, HELP, SOMEBODY, HELP, YOU STUPID FUCKING BIRD I SHOULD HAVE EATEN YOU LIKE A FUCKING TURDUCKEN SHOW ME FOR DOING A GOOD DEED FUCK FUCK I NEVER EVEN GOD LLAAAAIIIIDDD!"
Yeeeeeppp. Totally. Cool. That's what I was.
Anyway, after my...flight (OH GOD, MY ARM, IT FEELS LIKE ITS GOING TO FALL OFF!) I was miles away from civilization, nestled between volcanos in what could reasonably called 'no-mans land'. Mostly because no man was suicidal enough to live in an area where there was more lava than water. Also the sheer level of ash and smog swirling around the area that I was hacking my lungs out from because of all the volcanic vents surrounding me. I legitimately thought I was going to die there, choking to death because I decided to try and do a good deed...until the ash and smog were blown away in a massive burst of hot wind, then I thought I'd die a DIFFERENT way.
Namely, at the claws of the 5 AND A HALF STORY PHOENIX IN FRONT OF ME. While the one I saved was cute as a button, and sent sparks and embers in its wake, this...monster, god, existence, was 1,000 times anything it could ever hope to be. A proud flare of feathers resembled a crown around its massive head, leading into a curved beak and eyes the size of me that burned with the intensity of the summer sun. And all around it, was a sight that boggled my mind. Too and fro around the great beast were more of the little birds I had rescued, dozens, hundreds, thousands, but none of them perched on the rock formations or volcano peaks around us. No, I watched as they moved in and out of the great bird before me as if it was an illusion, and it was then I understood.
What I saved earlier wasn't a pheonix...it was just a feather. A feather of the TRUE, phoenix that I was now before, cast of and granted life through some unknown means. It was breath-taking, humbling to realize the sheer vastness and nature of the being before me...and utterly terrifying.
The tears trailed down my face as I thought about the people I'd never see, how my family would deal with my disappearance, all the things I'd never get to do or see. My eyes snapped shut, bracing and ready for the worst, for it to be done...and felt the soft touch of something on my head.
I opened my eyes, and nearly swallowed my tongue as my vision was completely overtaken with the massive bird, a single, massive talon as bright as polished gold. With a single push of its massive frame I'd be crushed like and ant.. but it never did. That same strength to crush me utterly was held aloft as if it was but a cloud.
Then I heard its trill. The sound...was incredible. It rumbled through my bones to the ground beneath me, filled my lungs with air that didn't burn, and went straight to my head like a fine wine. It spoke no words, needed no lyrics. This was a primal song that existed long before man had ever thought of such things.
I understood, at that moment, that I would live. That I would THRIVE. That my good deed, was appreciated.
The talon was brought away, and now that I could look at the massive birds face, I could see that, despite its harsh beak, there was unmistakably a smile to its features. The lines of its eyes, the gleam of mischief in its eyes.
I laughed, the loudest and hardest I ever had in my life, tears sadness changed to joy and relief as the bird around me joined in, a chorus forming around us that doubtlessly rang through the peaks and lows of the mountains and flows around us. I wondered if the people at the camps could hear us, could understand what was happening? I didn't truly care.
The laughter ended as all things did, and I was left again staring upward, lighter than I had ever felt. Then the Phoenix did something that would change the course of my life, even if I didn't understand at the time.
With an ease begetting its size, a wing was brought up, and the same beak that could crush bones like paper was deftly brought to its side, where it plucked a single feather. It floated to the ground like any feather would, red as the setting sun, and when it touched the ground, between the time I blinked, turned into another of the birds I still saw flittering around. But this one...didn't move. Didn't jump around, flap its wings, or give its little trills. It merely was.
I looked up questioningly at the massive bird, but it merely gave a nod before turning towards the sun. When it turned back, it nodded one more time, then took a massive hop back, briefly shaking the earth with its weight before raising both wings, replacing the light of the sun with its own inner light for a moment. Then I got the message.
"You...want me to eat this?" I was disbelieving, who wouldn't be after the roller coaster of an afternoon I'd had, but the Phoenix merely trilled again, not answering me but giving an answer all the same.
Then those same wings raised high, flapped down, and it was gone, the only proof of its presence being the swirls of ash left in its slipstream wake, and the bird at my feet. I hesitantly picked it up, the flesh hot to the touch even after it left the hot ground, and carefully, reverently, placed it into my pack that had miraculously survived the travel.
From there...the trek was a bit of a blur. I can't remember if it was because of my thoughts swirling and trying to comprehend what I had just experienced, or heatstroke from spending so long in the sweltering heat, but eventually I remembered my emergency flare, and got myself rescued in the next few hours by helicopter.
I had my collectors license revoked for going into such an obviously deadly and furthermore restricted area, making me have to give back my slamandrake clippings, but I was too dazed to care. And I stayed that way until that night, where I finally snapped out of it, and got Searsha. This was a meal I refused to half-ass, and she was one of the only chefs around here I interacted with and trusted enough to not rat me out or ask too many questions.
Under the light of the moon I served as lookout while Searsha cooked, cracking her tortilla in chips while she prepared the mythical bird. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, it was ready, the two of us staring down at the small plate of red glazed poultry, served with bright yellow chip bits and green limes for color and citrus. We didn't care that we were so close, just shy of nude because of the intense heat. We were entranced by the platter below us.
I took the first bite, using a chip as a makeshift scoop to take some meat with a small squeezing of lime...and felt my body burst into flames. My skin soaked through with sweat, everything burned, I wanted to spit it out, needed too if I wasn't going to be rendered into ashes...but I took another bite. My jaws broke the chip and I became the heat. My mouth was burned away to reveal entirely new and fresh taste buds that made me see the world through a different lens.
I simply sat there panting, arms having braced themselves on my knees as I struggled to bring myself back. After a minute, I rasped out a word, the air around us previously so hot and dry now feeling like a cool breeze to my burned throat.
"More." Before I did it all again. And again. And again. I didn't take note of Searsha doing the same thing beside me after seeing that I didn't die or spontaneously combust, all that mattered was the heat I could feel burn away all that I was into something so much greater. My teeth, my bones, muscles, and brain, they were rendered to a charred mess before flaking away to reveal perfect forms beneath the chaff. I understood now why I was given this. I understood why my path was inherently impossible, that this was an experience that could never be preproduced, never made lesser than the miracle it was...
But that just made the fire in my stomach grow. Impossible? Maybe. But so was everything else humans had done. In a world of monsters, humans had solidly shown they were part of the food chain by eating their way into it kicking and screaming. it might be impossible now, but 10 years? 20? 30? Arcacia changed the world, and so will I.
The plate was empty as my epiphany came to an end, not a single crumb or trace of sauce remaining. One of us must have licked the plate clean, but neither of us ever remembered, or tried that hard to in the first place. We both just...sat there, breathing, in the heat that suddenly was like a taste of home.
After that, we just. Left. Searsha decided to stay in Wul for a bit longer to experiment with the local flavors, see just how much she could advance her Tortillas with additional ingredients and spices, while I went back home after my travel fund ran out. I didn't get the cuttings I had been sent for, but mum understood exactly how it had happened and was happier that I was still around at all than some stupid little plant experiment they could try again with later.
That...was the first time I ever truly considered my Full Course Menu, and the first dish I ever added to it.
(END OF FLASHBACK)
Ahh, memories. All the minks were rounded up in secure housing now, and it only took...THREE AND A HALF HOURS! Damnit, I'll miss dinner!
I beat feet back to the base, cursing Zachary for not snapping me out of my stupor, or at least leaving a note.
END OF CHAPTER
Alright everybody, this was a big one, and thus, this bit'll be a big one too! Remember how every TV sitcom ever makes Thanksgiving out to be some hellish holiday where you toil all day and it still all goes wrong at the end? Well, just like with most of television, this is a massive lie. Prepping for Thanksgiving, or any holiday where you're cooking a big meal can be made super easily! All it takes is, like, 45 to an hours worth of actual work, outside cooking time where you can do whatever.
There's a lot of stuff to go over with this stuff, so I'm going to be splitting this into two parts. Part 1 will be Turkey, and Part 2 will be Side-Dishes. Sound good? Great. Then here's...
TTOD PART 1: HOLIDAY TURKEY
Now, there's a lot of little tricks you can use when you're prepping a turkey to either make it easier for you, or to avoid the most common issues that come up. Let's get into some of the more obvious ones.
1: Check to make sure your turkey fits: This is one of the most common problems that hold up or ruin a holiday. Before you do anything else, after buying a turkey, put it in the pot or pan you plan to cook it in, and make sure it fits in your oven, with a bit extra room on top for clearance. This will save you a ton of trouble later on, as well as avoiding futzing around with an already thawed turkey later.
2: Prep your area and tools: One of the biggest hassles about the holidays is getting things ready to cook early on in the mornings so its ready by 3 pm for some reason. The simplest solution to this? Get shit ready the night before. Line your pan with tinfoil, heavy-duty to ensure nothing breaks or pokes through, get your spices ready on the counter, make sure you have everything you'll actually need so you don't need to make last-minute runs, ect. it sounds like a no-brainer, but I guarantee this'll help someone when they're struggling to see if they forgot something after a few hours of sleep.
3: Stuffing your turkey: The purpose of stuffing a turkey is to help it keep its shape as it cooks, but there are a variety of ways and objects you can use to stuff it. On of the things I like to do, instead of traditional stuffings, is to use frozen orange peels and vegetable ends, such as celery bases and pepper cores. These generally get thrown out anyway with the turkey fat and bones, but they give the meat a nice, fresh flavor as it cooks. By the time it all cooks down, you're turkey will be in fine shape.
4: Thawing and rinsing your turkey: A turkey should be, at a minimum, thawed for three days before you actually cook it, to prevent freezer burned meat. You can comfortably do this by letting it rest in your fridge during this time, often in a plastic bag just in case something leaks. After the thawing has happened, put your turkey in a sink and open it from its wrapping, while cold water washes over it. Some people like to use a stopped sink for this, but I'm not a fan, as it risks salmonella. Anyway, during this stage you'll be removing the giblets from the inside of your turkey, alongside any 'freshness' items they might have put in there to preserve it. Then, merely set your turkey in your pre-prepper pan.
5: Seasonings and oils: The key to turkey is more is more, less is less. Give the turkey a fine coating of olive oil, then go to town on your spices, making sure to knead some if its not going into some of the deeper curves. A lot of this will cook out while it, well, cooks, so don't be shy. Another thing you can do is give it a nice glaze of whiskey, for a smoky finish to the skin. I like to use Fireball because of the cinnamon flavor bleeding through, but that's just me. Just remember not to use vodka or the like, as that brings no essential flavor, it would merely cook out.
6: Water: NO ONE, likes dry turkey. Luckily, the simplest way to prevent it is to make sure your turkey has a good amount of water in the pan while it cooks, generally around a cup or two depending on the size of your pan. After ensuring it has enough liquid in the base, tent your turkey over with another layer of tinfoil, possibly two if its a wide enough pan, and ensure its sealed on all sides. This will force the moisture to stay with the turkey, making it mouthwateringly juicy. You can also check it every so often while its cooking for a tell-tale sizzle. If you hear the sizzle, it still has all the liquid it needs. If you don't hear the sizzle, use a small measuring cup to add some more, before fixing the foil with a glove-mitt.
7: Cooking time: A good turkey needs, at a minimum, 6 hours to thoroughly cook, with the standard rule of thumb being half an hour (30 mins) per pound of turkey, but don't take that for granted. This isn't to say a 1 pound turkey would only need 30 mins, that would be stupid. The previous rule only applies to turkeys past 12 pounds or more, but even then I would argue for longer just to be safe. Undercooked turkey is so disappointing after all.
AND, there we go! All the tips you need to properly make cooking a turkey take, maybe, 5 to 15 minutes to get in the oven for the next 7 and a half to 8 hours, during which you can do whatever you want! Catch up on your sleep, do some writing, enjoy time with the family, whatever you want. You won't need to do anything else until the turkey is about ready, and even then that's just about 30 minutes of work. Curious how? Then stay tuned for next time!
END OF TTOD
Damn, this might actually be my single largest chapter update...ever! It's honestly kind of exciting. Ah well, hope you all enjoyed the ride as well, and share some love below like always! I love to hear about all the delicious ideas and experiences running through your minds after all. Cheers!
