By the time Professor Singer - or Bobby, as he apparently insisted Dean call him - called and said he was on his way to their little house-turned-farm, the initial flare of relief from finally having a reliable source of cow information (since Cas neither was a dependable source nor stooped to trusting the Google) was steadily fading. The realization that Bobby would have to interact with Cas - who, much as Dean l- liked him (platonically, naturally. As a roommate), was always a handful - was sobering enough that it had Dean contemplating calling the whole damn thing off.

Except.

Not that Dean cared about Samantha, but… they really did need advice to make sure she'd be okay with their rather limited circumstances. (Again, not at all connected to the cow. At all.)

So he went ahead with biting the bullet and telling his professor that yes, that was a good time - or, at least, as good a time as any - and to drop in whenever. And then, in an effort to minimize the oncoming damage, he warned said roommate, shouting from the living room to reach Cas… wherever he was and let him know, "Hey, Cas, Bobby says he's on his way!"

"Bobby? Oh, Bobby. " Wherever Cas was , it quickly became abundantly clear that he'd just charged headlong towards Samantha's bedroom and stumbled inside, already near-shrieking, "Samantha, you simply must get dressed! You are indecent -"

Which… well… clearly Dean was getting used to this whole having-a-cow-in-Cas'-vicinity thing because he was very much unsurprised by that particular statement and instead far more focused on the fact that the cow was perfectly fine as she wa- er, in her current state of dress. "What? Cas, no, she's fine."

And then Cas was frowning at him - which did absolutely nothing whatsoever, at all, ever - and shaking his head. "She's growing up, Dean. She can't just… run around naked anymore. She wears skirts now." And, true to his word, he did indeed have her denim skirt in his hand and was, quite ineffectually, trying to figure out how Charlie had gotten it open. "And lip-gloss." Samantha - who, Dean was discovering, seemed to plot against him at any given opportunity - chose that precise moment to moo, and Cas seized upon it with both hands. "See, look! Mooo. Or, as it's properly translated into English: get over it, Dad."

Which… okay. Skirts were one thing. But lip-gloss… not that Dean cared about the cow, but lip-gloss and all of the many and varied chemicals and dyes found within it simply did not belong on a cow. "You're not going to put lip-gloss on her, Cas. And she's still a baby. Literally. She's… like… what, two weeks old? At most?" (He absolutely did not wonder if her birthday was public record… if he did, it was solely so that they could know her age for sure and not at all because Cas had adopted the cow and adoption meant birthday parties. That never even factored into his consideration.)

Cas nodded. "At most. But that's adult, Dean."

"No, Cas. Let her be." And Cas did not have any right to deflate that much because it made Dean feel ba- Nothing. At all. He was just… compromising because Cas was his roommate. No feelings involved. Feelings? What are those? Stupid, imaginary things, that's what. "Look, leave her be till Bobby's gone and then you can summon the other demonic fashion maven and do your worst. Capisce?"

Cas shook his head again, but it was less a disagreement than it was a fond - no, not fond, that made no sense… not fond, more like… something. Whatever. Feelings weren't Dean's cup of tea; let someone else name 'em - and paired with, "Charlie is not demonic, Dean. And why would we do our worst? Samantha wants to look good for company, I'm sure."

Samantha moo'd. (As a side note, Dean's party line of Samantha-is-a-cow-and-cows-don't-talk-Cas wasn't seeming to hold much water at the moment… but he must have been wrong. Er, wrong the second time and right the first. Cows don't talk. Or understand speech. Right? …Right?)

Cas clearly seemed to think it was proof of something , though, and he quickly Vanna-White'd the cow. "See? I told you, Dean, she wants to look nice! She said as much! Just now! You heard her, right?"

Dean should have shaken his head and toed the party line. (No, Cas, the cow isn't speaking and I'm not at all considering the fact that maybe, possibly, kinda she's freaking talking or some shit.) He should have.

But there was Cas to consider and, not that Dean was at all swayed by that expression or that particular Sammy-slash-Samantha-puppy-dog-eyes look, he grudgingly nodded. "I heard her, Cas. But… just… forget the skirt?"

And Cas nodded.

Which probably would have been the end of things were Dean talking to literally anyone except Cas. (And maybe Charlie.) Instead, he got an additional confused look and, "But… she can't wear pants, Dean. Perhaps a dress?"

Dean may or may not have felt the sudden urge to shake his roommate until the man actually listened, but he didn't. (He was not at all infuriated. Of course not. He was… perfectly calm. Not at all emotionally invested in whether he was going to stick the poor cow- er, the cow into some human clothing without regard for her preferences.)

Which was also why appearances were deceiving and Dean wasn't yelling. Or, well, projecting. "Cas. She's a cow. Let. Her be. A cow." And then (not that he was at all swayed by that damn expression reappearing in Cas' eyes, but), "At least until Bobby leaves." (Dean invested at least a minute of the ensuing silence contemplating whether 0930 hours was too early to start drinking and deciding that the jury was still out on the matter. More evidence would need to be collected before that particular verdict could be reached.)

More evidence like: "Bobby can't just see her like this, Dean."

Which made it abundantly clear that Cas didn't get why Bobby was going over in the first place. "Yes, he can. And he's going to have to because he's going to help us look at the damn farm animal, Cas-"

And that apparently meant… absolutely nothing. "Nudity is illegal, Dean."

Dean… had no argument. He literally had no clue how to respond to that of all things… so he was very grateful when, instead of needing to address it, a knock sounded at the door. Indeed, precisely because he had no clue how to respond to that of all things, he hurried to go answer the door. (And, if it had the side effect of preventing Cas from stuffing the poor cow - not that Dean cared at all, of course - into more non-cow clothing, so much the better.)

It, however, did not have the side effect of preventing Cas from flinging himself over the cow and shouting out, "You wasted her dressing time, Dean!" just as Professor Bobby Singer trekked all the way to Lawrence, Kansas and walked through the front door, which was almost certainly the cause of the confused look taking residence on his face.

Which… well… he should probably explain. Much as he didn't want to, he should. He really should. But could he avoid it? Was it possible to avoid it? Apparently not. Fine. So he passed his hand over his face, stifled a sigh, and tried to summon the words to explain. "He's… protecting the cow's modesty."

Cas huffed. "She has the right to privacy, Dean. How would you feel if I saw you naked?"

Dean was not at all bothered by that comment. Why would he be? That would be ridiculous. And would make no sense. They were roommates. Er, wait, that's a point; precisely because they were roommates, he was bothered, but not beyond anything normal. Of course not. "I'm not a cow, Cas." (He was not at all defensive.)

Cas squinted over at him. "I don't know that, Dean. You're always clothed."

Dean was absolutely not gritting his teeth for any reason. He was perfectly calm. He could deal with it and be completely calm the entire time. Like… like a leaf on the wind. (Which he immediately regretted thinking because... okay, not that it was a big deal but maybe Charlie had insisted he watch Firefly and maybe they'd binged it all in one night and maybe they'd watched the movie, too, and maybe it'd be a good long while before he got over it. Maybe. But also, absolutely not.) "Cas. Cows… aren't humans. I thought we covered this." And then he turned to Bobby (he absolutely had not temporarily forgotten Bobby was there while Cas was being… Cas… but he had) and apologized.

Or, well, tried to apologize, since he only got out "Sorr-" before Cas was interrupting. "No, Dean, I thought we covered this. They can be anything they want to be. Including humans."

Calm, Dean. Calm. "They're literally a different species, Cas." And then, back to Bobby and actual practical business: "So, Samanth-"

And then Cas seemed to remember Bobby, too - not that there was a "too" because obviously Dean hadn't forgotten in the first place - and appealed to him. "You're a doctor; tell him."

Which… just… what. "Cas, I never said he was a doctor."

He blinked. "Then… Why is he here?"

"Because he has experience with farm animals, Cas." Dean was definitely getting practice at shooting apologetic glances at his professor (not that he was at all mortified, of course).

"Oh." And then Cas was walking over and profferring his hand for a shake. "I'm afraid your services are not required. Samantha isn't a farm animal, you see. She's a domestic co-"

"You know what, forget it." Dean reached out and yanked Cas back (not feeling absolutely any degree of bad for the very undignified squawk it prompted). "We'd very much appreciate you taking a look at her… if you're still willing. We've got beer as payment, if you want it. Hell, you might need it to get through the whole thing."

Since the beginning of the year, Dean had been reasonably confident that Professor Bobby Singer could handle just about anything without being fazed. Clearly, Cas-plus-cow had overridden that, at least judging by his vaguely wide-eyed nod. "Uh… yeah. Prob'ly a good idea."

Dean nodded and headed for the door… but then of course Samantha had to moo and Cas was interrupting his departure with, "Samantha wants one too!"

Except apparently he didn't just interrupt… he also decided to charge towards the kitchen and get the beer himself , which honestly just couldn't stand. (Not that Dean cares about the cow, of course… he just wanted to protect his beer, of course.) "No, Cas, no beer for the cow." Except Cas was already gone and in the kitchen and there was the sound of clinking bottles and shit. "Cas? Cas!"

Dean had just made it to the door when Cas finally shouted back, "She's growing up, Dean, and you can't stop rebellion forever!"