=Normal POV=
[Saturday, 10/27/2018; 12:30 am]
[Berk; Haddock/Forger Home]
The night was going well, and everyone was still awake, except for Miya, Devon, and Gabriel. Gabriel had gone off to bed around 11:50 pm, and then Miya admitted to being exhausted at 12:10 am, so she and Devon went off to the spare room to get some sleep. The friends set up their sleeping spots at midnight as Miya and Devon were leaving the master suite. The music was turned down more, the TV was left off, and the friends continued to talk about whatever came to mind. It was mostly school and plans after graduation. Perhaps the chat or two about other sleepovers they could plan throughout the remainder of their Senior Year. When High School was over, all of them would be getting jobs or going to college, so this was really their last year to have sleepovers and hardly any big responsibilities.
"Hayden, have you decided what you'll do after graduation?" Bryan inquired curiously. However, Hayden didn't reply. Looking over, the friends discovered that Hayden was lying back on his bed, head on the pillows and sleeping.
"The pills make him tired, but this is the latest I've seen him stay up while on them," Syrus mentioned.
"Hayden has told me before that they usually help him sleep around 11:30 pm, so I'm surprised he made it this long," Trayden chuckled a little, leaning over to kiss Hayden's cheek.
"We should dim the lights a bit, and quiet down if we're going to stay up to talk. I know I'm not tired yet," Katie informed.
"Same with us," Rylee admitted as Evan nodded.
"I'll second that," Alicia stated while leaning back against Tyler.
"I'm tired, but not enough to sleep," Mindy shrugged.
"I'm used to staying up," Andrew informed.
"I normally fall asleep by this point," Ford laughed a little.
"I'm good," Hailey smiled.
"Katie is right, though. We should dim the lights and let Hayden sleep," Alyssa agreed.
"Alexa, dim the lights," Trayden said as the Echo Dot gave off the swirling blue light around the top of the device.
"Dimming the lights." and the lights dimmed quite a bit afterward as the blue light faded off.
"There, that should be good for him," Trayden smiled.
"So, you two are official now? Dating-wise?" Tyler inquired.
"Yeah," Trayden nodded gently. "It's nice to be with him in a relationship," he added shortly after.
"I hope this doesn't stop over any boundaries, and if it does; you don't have to answer…But, which one of you two is the dominant one?" Bryan wondered.
"To be entirely honest…I don't know. Most of that stuff applies to sexual relations as far as I know, which I don't because I was only ever with Marcus," Trayden shrugged.
"Were you the submissive with Marcus?" Syrus questioned.
"Our relationship was normal as it would be with a male and female couple. When it came to the one time we had sex; he took charge of that because it was my first time, but I don't think it was his. I have my reservations that he was cheating on me because he seems to know what he was doing, but maybe that just came from tons of research," Trayden mentioned.
"I doubt you wanna approach and ask him," Hailey said.
"No, I'm good. It's done and over with now, so whatever. Regardless, I know that I only had sex once and it was with him. Hayden, on the other hand, has had sex numerous times before from 16 to 17, but had foreplay and what not since the time he was 15. As Marcus put it; Hayden has all the experience for if and when we ever get to a point in getting more intimate. So Hayden might be the dominant one in that particular department, and if so; I don't mind," Trayden stated calmly.
"There is no dominant or submissive," came Hayden's voice as he suddenly sat up in bed, rubbing his eyes a bit. "That's a common misconception in any relationship; same or opposite sex ones," he added while yawning.
"Did we wake you?" Mindy asked.
"No, I got up to use the bathroom and happened to overhear," Hayden said as he got off the bed and moved into his bathroom, closing the door. Less than a minute later; the toilet flushed, the sink was heard running, and then Hayden walked out while shutting off the light.
"So what do you mean there's no submissive or dominant?" Trayden asked. "Marcus said-,"
"Marcus doesn't know shit, and I base that off when he showed up to suddenly want me," Hayden rolled his eyes. "He used those terms as a way to control you and make himself seem like the big dick in your relationship with him. Now, …the words Dominant and Submissive are more a play to Top and Bottom during sex, but relationship-wise? No; they don't exist. There are some who like to play by those rules, Marcus being a prime example…But I don't, so you don't have to worry about that, baby," Hayden smiled some.
"Sounds like Marcus only acted as a dominant prick to control Tray into thinking he was submissive, and doing whatever Marcus wanted," Katie frowned.
"Marcus instantly assumed Hayden was submissive due to things that Bradley told him," Alicia added.
"But you admitted you weren't dominant over Brad; you only made Marcus think that," Evan said.
"In a sense, while I was the Bottom between Brad and me, I was still in control. Brad, at least up until the raping, only did what I said he could do. And he would ask if I'd do things to him, like hand or blowjob. But if I said no; it meant no. This didn't mean shit to him when I was in foster care and stuck at his house," Hayden mumbled.
"How did you get all…Dominant over Marcus, though? Since he thought he was dominant?" Trayden wondered.
"By being assertive, and then seducing the crap out of him," Hayden chuckled.
"How did you seduce him?" Trayden blinked. "I never saw that,"
"Us either," Ford added in. Hayden got up now, walking in front of Trayden and getting close like the day he did with Marcus. One thing Trayden noticed is that Hayden's left hand moved up his thigh and got closer to his crotch, but not all the way. Trayden felt a little nervous but turned on after Hayden ran his fingers through Trayden's jet black hair.
"You want me?" Hayden asked in a soft, inviting tone. "I'm all yours…" he said seductively, leaning in just enough that their lips were almost touching. However, after that, Hayden stood up straight and backed up a few steps.
"Odin almighty…" Trayden took a shaky breath.
"The only difference between you and Marcus, baby, is that Marcus got an erection and ran out when people took notice. Remember, the entire cafeteria saw what I did to Marcus in the fight, and with the dominance; that's why people were snickering when Marcus hurried out of the lunchroom. I seduced and humiliated him," Hayden shrugged.
"And that line you said was from Suicide Squad," Syrus laughed a little.
"Yes. Yes, it was," Hayden nodded before kissing Trayden's cheek and sitting next to him. "But, as I said, babe; there's no dominant or submissive between us. And as far as sex goes, that all depends on what you like to do when it comes to pleasure," he said. "Marcus likely never let you do anything to him,"
"No, not really," Trayden shook his head. "There was never any foreplay leading up to when we had sex the one time. He let me stroke him to get him hard before we started, but that was it. Anything before during our relationship was making out and him touching me,"
"Yeah, that's all kind's of wrong. I will say that Brad was better than Marcus in that sense…Brad took the time to get me used to things from 15 to 16; he'd let me try things on him, and I'd tell him what he could do to me, or at least what I was comfortable trying at the time," Hayden remarked. "And that is the ONLY good thing I'll say about him," he muttered. "You don't have to worry, Tray. When we get to that point in our relationship; I'll do for you what Brad did for me. There is no dominant or submissive between us, and as far as sex would go…I'm versatile, so no top or bottom,"
"Versatile?" Alyssa asked.
"It means I can be giver and receiver, top or bottom. The straightforward answer is that I can get fucked or do the fucking. I don't mind either because Brad let me experience both sides of that spectrum," Hayden informed. "Brad only got forceful, and obviously against my will, during the foster care stuff after I rejected his advance to get me back,"
"Out of curiosity, and I get if you don't want to reply…But did any of the other homes you stayed in do that kind of stuff to you?" Trayden inquired.
"What? Rape me?" Hayden looked at him as Trayden nodded. "No. There was abuse, a little molestation here and there, but no rape," he admitted. "The first home I was in had nice people. I almost wish I hadn't tried to kill myself and stayed with them until I turned 18…Things might have been different,"
"Can't change the past, babe," Trayden kissed his cheek. Hayden laid back down, yawning and closing his eyes.
"I know, but they were good people. Two parents, two daughters, and expecting another. Well, that baby has been born by now," Hayden smiled some. "The girls were so happy to have a brother, even if I was just their foster one. I remember arriving there and the caseworker telling the parents that they didn't have to keep me once I turned 18. The parents and daughters instantly said that they wouldn't just kick me to the curb, and they wouldn't even mind me staying with them forever…But that was right after losing my parents, and I just couldn't deal with all the pain,"
"That was the first time you tried to end your life, wasn't it?" Hailey inquired carefully.
"I tried to overdose on a handful of different kinds of non-prescription drugs; I don't remember much more than that other than waking up in Archian Psychiatric," Hayden admitted.
"After I was released, Child Services tried to take me back to that house…I got my few things and was sent off to the next place because the family was scared of what I did, and that I'd try again, so they sent me away," Hayden said.
"Was this one of the abusive houses?" Bryan wondered.
"Everyone but the sister was mean in that house; they made me do all the chores right away after the caseworker left. I slept in the basement on the cement; they wouldn't let me upstairs until morning. If I slacked; the brother and father would beat me. The mother only let me eat twice the whole time I was there. The sister tried to sneak me food but got caught, and they abused her too. The caseworker came to check on me and noticed all the bruises, so they took the sister and me out of the house," Hayden explained; his eyes still closed and turned onto his side as if he were going to go to bed.
The friends were surprised Hayden was so open about everything; they had been trying to get him to talk since last year around this time. "That's awful…" Mindy frowned.
"The next family didn't have kids; it was just me. The father was an abusive prick; he used the belt a lot and molested me a couple of times. The mother fed me little or none at all. I was moved to the Holgerson Family because the caseworker saw the abuse pretty easily," Hayden informed.
"You don't have to tell us about that, Hayden; we can put it together from what you've said already…" Syrus said quickly. However, Hayden didn't reply, and the group got a bit worried they'd upset him by asking too much, but they found that Hayden was sleeping. "Uh…Hayden?" Syrus asked.
"He can knock out like that whenever?" Bryan inquired.
"Not usually, no…" Trayden stated. "Babe?" he tried. "To be entirely honest here…I don't even think he's been awake since lying down after talking about dominant and submissive thing,"
"You mean he said all that while sleeping?" Tyler blinked.
"He had to of…Hayden's eyes have been closed since talking about the first family, and he looked far too comfortable to be talking about such things. Hayden can't even talk about that stuff in his appointments wide awake and me holding him…There's no way he said all this consciously…" Trayden remarked as he shifted a bit and shook Hayden. "Hey, babe, wake up,"
Hayden twitched a little and yawned while sitting up and rubbing his eyes. "Hm? Yeah, baby?" Hayden asked.
"You fell asleep on us while talking, and mumbled a bit. What's the last thing you said?" Trayden asked with a smile.
"Oh, it was the answer to your question," Hayden yawned again tiredly. "No one in the other homes raped me; they were just abusive…It's almost 1 am; I'm too tired to stay up…I'm sorry," Hayden replied.
"Oh, no, no, babe. It's alright. We just wanted to know what you said. Go on, get some rest," Trayden kissed him lightly as Hayden nodded, kissing back, then going back to sleep. After fifteen minutes of silence, Hayden's was knocked out again. "I told you; he doesn't know he said anything. The last thing he remembers telling us is that he wasn't raped in other homes," he informed calmly.
"What do we do?" Alicia wondered.
"I don't think we should do anything. Hayden might become upset if he knows he said something," Hailey mentioned.
"I will work with him on it; I know he likely won't mind if I overheard him sleep-talking, but I don't know about any of you," Trayden said.
"So we pretend that we heard nothing?" Alyssa asked.
"That would be best," Trayden nodded.
"Alright, no problem then," Katie replied. "But you will tell him eventually that we were awake, yes?"
"I will ease him into understanding that he said it in his sleep to all of us," Trayden assured. "For now; it's late, and we should get some sleep," he added.
"I agree," Ford yawned. Not long after, and by 1:15 am; everyone had used the bathroom and gotten set in their sleeping bags. Trayden took care of shutting the music off fully and the lights once everyone was lying down.
"Night," Trayden told the others as he laid down on the floor in front of Hayden's bed.
. . .
[5:00 am]
Hayden woke up on his own around 4:00 am; there hadn't been a nightmare or anything. Hayden got past everyone on the floor and used the bathroom before getting back into bed, but found he was unable to fall asleep again. Sighing heavily, he got his phone and started browsing through social media to kill time, hoping that it would make him tired. Sadly, this did not happen, so Hayden just tried lying down in the dark. So far, nothing. Trayden found himself waking up while it was still dark out; he lazily reached for his phone and checked the time. Trayden shifted a bit to get up and out of the sleeping bag as Hayden turned hearing nose.
"Tray?" Hayden asked.
"Yeah, it's me," Trayden whispered. "I thought you were sleeping,"
"I've…Been up since 4 am…" Hayden admitted quietly.
"Did you have a nightmare?" Trayden wondered.
"No, just woke up and can't sleep now," Hayden shrugged a little. "What are you doing up?"
"Bathroom," Trayden smiled some. "If you want; I'll sit up and chat with you after I get back?"
"You don't wanna go back to sleep?" Hayden inquired.
"Nah, around this time if I get up to use the bathroom; I can't get back to sleep anyway. It's weird; I know," Trayden stood up.
"I'm like that sometimes; it depends on what time it is," Hayden replied. "Meet you in the living room?"
"Will do," Trayden nodded as he moved to the bathroom inside Hayden's room while Hayden exited the bedroom and went down the hall to the living room. After a few moments, Trayden walked in and sat next to him on the couch. "So, what's up?" he asked with a smile.
"The ceiling," Hayden smiled a bit.
"Huh, that was a good answer," Trayden chuckled a bit.
"Glad you like it," Hayden responded. "Now, can I ask you something?"
"Anything you want," Trayden replied.
"Did I wake up around 12:30 am and intercept on a conversation about submissive and dominant?" Hayden wondered.
"Yes," Trayden nodded.
"And did you ask me if I'd been raped in any other foster home than Olivia and Brad's?" Hayden inquired.
"I did; you said no and then fell asleep," Trayden smiled. Hayden sighed a bit. "What's wrong?"
"Tray, did I say anything after I fell asleep?" Hayden questioned. Trayden paused a moment.
"Yes…" Trayden informed.
"What…Did I say?" Hayden pushed. "Please, tell me?"
"You were talking about the foster homes you were in. Nothing in extreme detail, just what mainly happened in each. We thought you were awake because you kept answering when we asked questions. I'm the one who realized you were talking in your sleep," Trayden confessed.
"So the others know too?" Hayden looked down a little.
"Yes, they do. But I already told them not to pester you about anything. And hey, don't be so down. The fact you did this while you were sleeping is amazing progress Hayden," Trayden offered.
"I wasn't entirely sleeping, just like…Half out. I knew I was just about asleep, but could still hear others. I guess I felt like I was dreaming…If that makes sense," Hayden shrugged.
"It does, doesn't worry," Trayden assured. "But you managed to get it out, Hayden; that's what matters. Now, if we can find a way to get you that comfortable again…Maybe we can help you work through it in therapy?"
"I-I can try," Hayden replied.
"Awesome. What's your next appointment?" Trayden inquired.
"Uh…I think Wednesday at 4 pm," Hayden said.
"Want me to come again? We can go to dinner after, have a little date? First one as a couple?" Trayden offered.
"Yeah, that sounds nice," Hayden nodded. "I'd like that,"
"Then it's a date. Want me to drive? Or just come over after school, and we can zip through homework; then go afterward?" Trayden asked.
"The second idea seems good. Besides, you usually have to get your siblings settled before leaving the house, so that works out," Hayden chuckled.
"Well, alright then," Trayden leaned in and kissed Hayden lightly. "Like you,"
"Like you too," Hayden stated as he leaned against Trayden comfortably. Not long after, they began talking once more about whatever. It would be a while before the rest of the group woke up for breakfast, and everyone hung out more until then began to go home around late morning or after lunch.
