Chapter 3

Anakin twisted his hands together as he waited for Obi-wan to answer. When the door opened, Anakin found himself gaping at Obi-wan.

Obi-wan was stunning. Older than Anakin, but that only made him look more dignified.

Maybe having sex with him wouldn't be too bad. Certainly, it couldn't be worse than what he'd experienced with Maul.

"Anakin, I take it?"

Oh God, that accent. Anakin felt a flush of arousal go through his body, something that hadn't happened since Maul.

"That's right. You're Obi-wan?"

"Correct. Please, come in."

Anakin followed Obi-wan inside, already fiddling with the hem of his shirt, ready to take it off as soon as Obi-wan told him to.

"Would you like something to drink?"

"Yes, please," Anakin said quickly. A drink would surely help fortify his courage for what was to come.

Obi-wan poured him a glass of wine. "A toast, to our future partnership."

"To our partnership." Anakin took a big gulp of wine. He expected that Obi-wan would want to finish with drinks quickly and get down to business, but Obi-wan seemed in no hurry.

"So, Anakin, tell me some more about yourself."

What did he want to know about Anakin for? Anakin was just a hired piece of ass. Obi-wan wasn't paying to hear his pathetic life story.

He shrugged. "I'm not very interesting. Tell me more about you."

Obi-wan frowned. "That's not how this is going to work, Anakin. I don't know how much Sidious told you about what I'm looking for?"

"Not much," Anakin admitted. "He just said that you want a permanent escort."

"That's right. I want companionship, Anakin. I'm lonely. I want sex as well, but that's hardly the only thing I'm looking for. I want someone I can confide in and trust. I want to get to know you as a person."

Anakin's hopes rose. If Obi-wan saw him as a person and not just a whore, maybe he would be gentler than Maul. He seemed kind and genuinely curious about Anakin.

"Well, I live with my sister, and I'm studying mechanical engineering."

"Really? That must be an interesting subject."

"It is!" Before he could stop himself, Anakin was going on about the intricacies of engineering, telling Obi-wan all about the robot he was building and his plans for what he wanted to do with his degree.

It was only fifteen minutes later that he realized, to his mortification, that he'd been completely monopolizing the conversation.

"I'm sorry," Anakin mumbled. "I didn't mean to bore you."

"Not at all. I like how passionate you are about what you do. I wish I had as much interest in my own career."

"You don't like your job?"

Obi-wan sighed. "It's not that I dislike it. It's satisfying, in its own way. Just lately, I've been wanting something more. That's why I was looking through Sith Escort Services. You caught my eye, and I knew I had to meet you."

Anakin did his best not to flinch. Of course, Obi-wan wanted him for his body. He opened his mouth to tell Obi-wan that he was ready to get down to what he was really here for, but Obi-wan spoke first.

"Tell me more about your sister."

"Ashoka? She's great. I really couldn't wish for a better sister."

Anakin told Obi-wan a bit more about Ashoka, and Obi-wan in turn told Anakin about his personal life – or rather, his lack of it. He was friends with his business partner, Cody, but did very little socializing outside of work.

As the night wore on, Anakin found that he actually really liked talking to Obi-wan. They chatted back and forth about everything and nothing, getting to know each other.

Anakin was even looking forward to having sex with him. He was kind, funny, interesting, not to mention hot. He was almost certain that Obi-wan would be gentle with him, judging from what he'd seen so far.

They were sitting on opposite sides of the sofa but kept inching forward until they were right next to each other.

Obi-wan's eyes flicked to Anakin's lips. Anakin leaned a little closer so that he could feel Obi-wan's warm breath on his cheek.

Obi-wan closed the rest of the distance and kissed him. Anakin sighed into the kiss. Obi-wan's lips on his felt amazing. He was sweet and soft and –

Suddenly, it was no longer Obi-wan.

It was Maul, his hands tight on Anakin's shoulders, his tongue invading Anakin's mouth without his permission.

"NO!" Anakin staggered to his feet, backing away so quickly that he tripped and fell backward onto the floor.

"Anakin? Are you alright?"

"Don't touch me!"

Obi-wan crouched down in front of him. "Alright, dearest, I won't touch you. But please, tell me what's wrong? Did I do something?"

Anakin shook his head, tears spilling down his cheeks. "You didn't. I'm sorry, I – we can continue."

He needed this job. He couldn't afford to act like a baby now.

"Anakin, we don't need to –"

Anakin lunged forward, capturing Obi-wan's lips in his, kissing him desperately, trying to fight off the nausea swelling in his stomach.

"Anakin, stop." Obi-wan's firm hands on his shoulders held him at arm's length.

"We can continue – I can be good for you, Obi-wan, please…"

"Dearest, you're crying. You're obviously distressed. Of course, I'm not going to touch you while you're like this. Here, please sit down."

This only made Anakin cry harder. Did Obi-wan not understand? This job was his last option. If he couldn't perform, Ahsoka would be taken away from him.

"Anakin, please, try to breathe with me. You're hyperventilating, sweetheart. Just follow my breaths. In and out. Yes, just like that. You're doing so well."

With Obi-wan's help, Anakin slowly managed to get his breathing under control.

"I'm – I'm sorry," he hiccoughed.

"Please, don't apologize for being afraid. Anakin, did… did someone hurt you?"

Anakin couldn't get his voice to work, but he found himself nodding.

"Oh, Anakin, I'm so sorry. Know that I would never do something like that to you."

"I know you wouldn't. You're nothing like him. I just – I felt like I was back there with him and I panicked –"

"You don't need to explain. I understand how PTSD works. Have you been to the police?"

Anakin shook his head.

"Would you like me to come with you, dearest? We could go now, together."

Anakin shook his head again, more tears spilling down his cheeks. "I just – I want to forget it ever happened."

"I'll be here if you change your mind. May I hold you, dearest?"

Anakin bit his lip and nodded.

Obi-wan moved slowly, as though worried Anakin might bolt at any moment. He slowly put his arms around Anakin. Anakin melted into the embrace. The tears came thick and fast and he clung to Obi-wan's shirt.

He had been sure that he would take this secret to his grave, but for some reason, he trusted Obi-wan, even though he'd only known him a few hours. Anakin felt like the two of them had a connection.

"He – he h-held me down," Anakin sobbed. "I tried to fight, I swear I did, but he was too strong."
"I'm so sorry, Anakin." Obi-wan rocked him gently as he cried.

"It's my own fault, I know, but I still… it hurt."

"It is not your fault," Obi-wan said sharply.

"It is. I signed a contract. I agreed to no limits…"

"No contract you could sign gives anyone permission to rape you. What he did to you was wrong and not in any way your fault."

Anakin wished he could believe that.

Obi-wan kept holding him, whispering soothing words in his ear, until Anakin had calmed completely. He was so comfortable here in Obi-wan's lap, he didn't ever want to move, but he forced himself to sit up.

"I'm sorry. I'll – I'll tell Sidious to give your money back. I wish I could be what you wanted, but…"

"I still want you," Obi-wan said with a fierceness that surprised Anakin.

"What? But – after what just happened…"

"I told you, I'm lonely. I want companionship. I like you, Anakin. I think you'll be good for me."

"But you want sex," Anakin said in a small voice.

"I do, but that's not the main thing I want. Mostly, I want someone I can connect with. I connect with you. Even if you can't ever give me sex, I'd still like to hire you. We can go on dates, and you can come to boring work functions with me. We'll cook each other dinner and watch movies together, and cuddle if you're comfortable with that."

"You'd pay me just for that?"

"Of course. I want you in my life, Anakin, in whatever capacity you are willing to give me."

How the hell did he ever find someone like Obi-wan? This was better than Anakin ever could have hoped for. Still, he didn't want to be unfair to Obi-wan.

"Are you sure you don't want someone else? There's probably someone out there who you can connect with who can also give you sex."

"Maybe, but that someone wouldn't be you, now would it? I won't try to force you to take the job, but it's yours if you want it."

"I want it," Anakin said at once. He still felt bad doing it, knowing that he couldn't be everything Obi-wan wanted, but he didn't have the luxury of turning this opportunity down. Maybe he could work up to having sex with Obi-wan. It wasn't like he didn't want to. Surely, with time, he would be able to.

Anakin knew that Obi-wan would drop him as soon as he found someone he liked who was also willing to offer him sex, but hopefully, Anakin would have enough money saved up by then that it wouldn't matter if it took him a few months to find a job.

"Then you have it. I'll draw up the contract tomorrow. But first, we need to establish some ground rules. First of all, I need you to tell me if something doesn't work for you or makes you uncomfortable. I'm your boss, but that doesn't mean you can't say no to me, understand?"

"I understand, Obi-wan."

"Good. Secondly, if you need anything – from money to emotional support – I want you to come to me. This isn't just about me. It's about the two of us, and creating a partnership that works for us both."

"I can do that."

"Good. And finally, I don't ever want to hear you saying that being raped was your fault. It was not your fault, and I won't hear otherwise. And if at any stage you want to report what happened to the police, I want you to tell me so that I can get you the best lawyer money can buy."

Anakin felt tears threatening again. Obi-wan was so good and kind. Anakin didn't deserve him. After all, he was nothing more than a hole to fuck… but saying that would certainly get him in trouble with Obi-wan, and Anakin didn't want to mess things up more than he already had.

"I will do that. Thank you, Obi-wan."

"Now, if you're willing, I would like you to sleep with me tonight – no sex, just some cuddling. I get lonely at night, and if you're agreeable, I will ask you to stay over sometimes. But if you can't, or you're not comfortable, you're allowed to tell me that, and I will respect it. Your job is safe, no matter what you decide."

Anakin considered this. He remembered how good it felt to be in Obi-wan's arms, and found that he wanted it again.

"I can stay. Let me just message Ahsoka."

"Will she be ok to get to school without you?"

"She'll be fine. She usually takes the bus anyway."

"If you'd like, I can give her a lift on my way to work?"

"I think let's wait a while before I introduce the two of you. I still haven't figured out what to tell her about all this. I don't really want to admit that I'm nothing more than a paid whore, one who can't even put out –"

"Don't talk about yourself like that," Obi-wan said sharply.

"Sorry," Anakin mumbled.

Obi-wan put a hand under his chin, forcing Anakin to look at him. "You don't need to be sorry, Anakin. Just… I hate to see you put yourself down like that. You're worth more than that – you know that, don't you?"

Anakin shrugged.

"I will show you, with time. Now, shall we go to bed?"

"Sure. I didn't bring anything to sleep in, though."

"No matter, you can borrow something of mine. You're taller than I am, but my stuff should fit you relatively well; it'll just be a bit short."

Anakin followed Obi-wan through to the bedroom. This was hardly the circumstance he'd envisioned going to Obi-wan's bed – after having a panic attack and crying all over him like a baby. Why Obi-wan still wanted him was something Anakin would never understand.

Obi-wan handed him a pair of sweatpants and a large t-shirt. Anakin went to the bathroom to get changed before coming to bed. Obi-wan was already in bed, shirtless. Anakin hesitated.

Obi-wan pulled the covers aside. "Come on in then, Anakin."

Anakin carefully got into bed, leaving a small gap between himself and Obi-wan.

Obi-wan wasn't having any of that. "Is it alright if I hold you?"

"Yes." Anakin's voice was a little strangled at the thought of Obi-wan's bare skin against his.

"You can so no if you want to," Obi-wan reminded him.

"No, it's ok. I just – I have nightmares. I don't want to wake you up."

"If you have a nightmare, I want you to wake me up," Obi-wan said firmly.

"Wait – really?"

"Of course. I want to know if you're in distress, Anakin. Always."

Fuck, he was going to cry again. No, he couldn't cry again. Obi-wan had been too kind already. Anakin wasn't going to make Obi-wan comfort him again.

"I'll wake you," Anakin promised. Not that he'd have much of a choice. He'd likely wake up screaming, which would definitely wake Obi-wan.

"Good. Sleep well, dearest."

Obi-wan shuffled himself closer, putting his arms around Anakin. Anakin's back was pressed up against Obi-wan's chest, and it was amazing. He felt so safe and calm here like nothing could ever hurt him again.

Of course, he'd snuggled with previous partners before, mostly after sex, but he'd always gotten the impression that they were impatient to be done with cuddling. Anakin was a good fuck, but it's not like he was worth more than that. It wasn't surprising no one had wanted to cuddle for long.

Except. Obi-wan sighed contentedly as he held Anakin close, his arms tightening slightly when Anakin whimpered softly, doing his best not to cry. Obi-wan was holding him like he never wanted to let go, and Anakin never wanted him to.

He drifted off to sleep within minutes.

Anakin bolted upright in bed, a scream tearing from his lips. The nightmare felt so real. He could still feel the blood dripping down his legs, feel the pain as Maul pressed into him.

Obi-wan's arms were suddenly there, pulling him flush against Obi-wan's chest.

"Shh, Anakin, it's ok. It was only a nightmare. I'm here. You're safe."

Anakin went limp in Obi-wan's grip, crying weakly into his chest. Obi-wan stroked his hair, pulling him so that they were lying down, Anakin's head resting on his chest.

"I'm – I'm s-s-sorry," Anakin sobbed.

"Don't ever be sorry for being afraid. We've been through this, Anakin. You don't have anything to be sorry for."

Obi-wan's voice was a perfect mixture of exasperated and fond. Anakin gave a watery chuckle. He stayed where he was, wrapping his arms around Obi-wan as his breathing settled.

"I should go. I can never fall asleep after a nightmare. I'll just keep you up with my tossing and turning."

"Anakin, it's the middle of the night. I'm not kicking you out of here at 2 am."

"I can take the couch –"

"Nonsense. Just lie back and relax. Do you have a favorite book?"

"A favorite book?"

"That's right."

"I, uh, I like Harry Potter…"

"Perfect." Obi-wan turned on the bedside lamp and left the room for a moment and returned with Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone in his hand.

"Lie down and close your eyes, Anakin."

Anakin did as Obi-wan asked.

"Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much."

Anakin's eyes snapped open. Was Obi-wan reading to him?

Yes, it quickly became apparent that Obi-wan was doing exactly that. Anakin let his eyes slip shut as he listened to the familiar words. There was something about Obi-wan's voice that was soothing and combined with the story he knew so well, it didn't take long for Anakin to drift off again.

This time, his sleep was free of nightmares.