So, after I wrote the first two chapters of this story, I wrote this one, and I've been building to it ever since. I hope you enjoy :)
Songs I listened to while writing this chapter:
I Believe by Christina Perri
Love Me Again by John Newman
Stand By You by Rachel Platten
Stay by Miley Cyrus
Safe by Banners
See You Soon by Amber Run
Outro by M83
Undisclosed Location
Luke opened his eyes and found himself standing in a field. There was a slight breeze, and birds could be heard chirping in the distance. He looked around, feeling confused. He had no idea where he was. He ran a hand over his head and felt surprised to feel hair again. He blinked. What the heck was happening? Was he dead?
"Luke!"
He whirled at the sound, seeing someone rushing towards him through the field, and his heart almost stopped.
"Keira," he said. He was floored. She reached him shortly, and he took in her older appearance. She was roughly in her early 20s. She was beautiful...happy. The smile on her face was huge.
"Long time no see," Keira commented, reaching to punch his arm lightly.
"How is this possible?" he asked. "Where are we? How did you...?"
"Come on!" she exclaimed, not answering him and reaching to grab his hand. "Everyone's waiting!" He let her pull him, his heart beating faster. He wasn't sure how it all worked or how he still even had a heart. He was new to this afterlife stuff, which is what he'd concluded where he must be if Keira was here. The thought of seeing Rita again, though, made him feel light and happy. Seeing Mei, Lance, his mother, and his father again was also a bit thrilling.
"I know I'm supposed to wait until you see him so he can tell you himself, but Lance said he's proud of you," Keira said to him. "He said you did good." The words hit Luke hard, and he suddenly very much wanted to see the father figure he'd missed for so long.
"Wait up!" her voice called, and he stopped abruptly, pulling Keira to a stop with him as he caught sight of his love. Rita was running towards him, and she, too, looked in her early 20s again. Luke let go of Keira's hand in order to catch Rita into an embrace when she threw herself at him, and he couldn't help but spin her around and make her laugh. When he stopped, he held her tight, breathing her in and feeling so relieved.
"I love you," she said.
"I love you so much," he replied.
"It was all worth it," Rita said. "We won."
"We did?"
"Yes."
And suddenly, he could see their victory in his mind. The relief was immense. It had all been worth it. He smiled as he ran his thumb across her cheek.
"Come on, guys," Keira urged, tapping his back to get his attention. "Everyone's waiting. They want to see you!"
"We're coming," Luke replied. "Don't worry."
"Oh, Keira!" Rita cried, pulling her into a hug. "Oh, you're so big! And beautiful. I'm so sorry for what happened to you."
"Don't be sorry," Keira told her, smiling at her. "There's no sadness here...no pain. Everything is good. Trust me."
"Keira, I...if I'd known," Luke tried, but she stopped him.
"It's okay," she reassured him. "I'm okay. I promise." Luke knew she was telling the truth, and he felt relieved that she was okay. She took his hand again, and he kept a hold of Rita's.
"Ready?" Keira asked them.
"Yea," Luke answered, looking at Rita, who was smiling. "We're ready."
"You said everyone?" Rita asked, sounding hopeful. He felt her squeeze his hand, and he knew what she was thinking.
"Come on," Keira said once more with another smile. As they walked, Luke felt lighter and lighter. He was going to see everyone again. He felt really good.
He just knew that everything was going to be alright.
2020
Heathrow Airport Base
Luke jolted awake and gasped. He lay there breathing hard, flicking his eyes back and forth. How was he alive right now? He played the events in his mind over again, and he knew he was supposed to be dead. He'd been in some sort of afterlife and everything. Keira's face was ingrained in his mind. They were going to see everyone else.
So what the hell happened?
"Oye!" Skinner hollered, making Luke turn his head to see the man approaching him, a huge grin on his face. "Get up! We won the war!"
Luke sat up slowly as Skinner moved on, conversing with the rest of the J-Squad and doing a lot of high fives and whooping. He felt immense relief at knowing they were all alive again too. And Mei. Then it hit him:
Rita.
He got dressed in record time and raced past the excited crowds of soldiers to find her. He was given looks as he walked through certain places since he was a private, but he didn't care. He found Rita on the floor of the training room doing his push up.
His heart flooded with love for her, and though he knew he'd have to go over everything with her again, he didn't care. Nothing could take away from his happiness right now. He surged towards her. She turned her head and saw him.
...
Rita had woken up to hear that a power surge had taken place in France that morning and now the enemy was rendered useless. She was wracking her brain as hard as she could, trying to figure out what happened. Had she somehow done it? Had someone else been able to reset the day and did it? She didn't know. She hadn't seen Mei that morning since there was no point in training if one could simply push over a Mimic without it fighting back. Her team had hooted and hollered and jostled each other around so much that she'd sought refuge in the training room just to get some space to think. She was still there thinking while holding herself up in her push up when footsteps approached. She looked to see Luke Wright standing there and grinning at her like an idiot, and she dropped to the floor.
"What the bloody hell are you doing here?" she asked, not knowing what else to say. What could she say? I love you? Do you hate me? How are you here? How did you know I needed you? Her emotions were all over the place. To her surprise, he burst out laughing. She got to her feet, glaring at him and feeling a bit aggravated. "Excuse me?!"
"Sorry," he said, holding up a hand. "I just...I'm so relieved to see you." She took in that statement and the way he was looking at her, and she just knew.
He'd done it.
"You," she said, shocked. All the feelings of shock and aggravation at being interrupted disappeared. All the feelings of angst towards him were put on hold.
"Me," he confirmed. She reached to grab his sleeve, hauling him with her somewhere private to avoid someone walking in on them. Once alone, she looked at him more closely.
"How?" she asked. He told her the whole story, and she listened in amazement. By the time he was done, she knew something had transpired between them before they'd "died." It was in the way he was looking at her. She just wasn't sure what it was that he knew.
"What did I say?" he asked. "I need to know. No more excuses, no more putting it off, no more saying it's too hurtful. I need you to tell me. Right now. We're supposed to talk, remember? So let's talk."
She closed her eyes briefly, reliving that moment in time all over again. She felt a tear trying to slide down her cheek. She inhaled deeply and opened her eyes again.
"You know what you said."
"Rita," he said, gesturing with his hand before letting it fall to his side. "I don't know what I said. Just tell me what I said."
"I tortured myself by watching it so many times, and it's real. I got it analyzed."
"Can we not do this vague dance right now?" Luke asked. "Watched what? What are you talking about?"
"He really never told you who he was? You didn't all have a good laugh at my expense?"
"No. Rita, what are you on about?! Who are you talking about?!"
"I can't do this," she said, turning to go, but he caught her arm to stop her.
"You have to," he said, a bit aggressively. "I'm not leaving until you tell me. This ends now, Rita."
"And what do you think is going to happen after I tell you?" she asked. "Do you think we'll just fall back together again? I am not the same girl I used to be, Luke." Her breath caught in her throat when he gripped her face with his hand and looked intently at her.
"Yes, you are," he told her, searching her eyes. "She's buried deep, but that girl is still in there. I've seen her. More than once."
This slightly unnerved her, but if he had seen it, then that must have meant she'd let her guard down with him, and if she'd done that, then obviously she had pushed through her negative feelings towards him...she'd let her true feelings come out. The way he was looking at her showed that she must have told him she still loved him.
"I was so hurt," she whispered.
"Then tell me about it so I can make it right," he instructed. "Please, Rita. Let me make it right." She breathed for a moment, hardly believing she was about to finally tell him everything. He didn't appear angry, just confused and concerned. She swallowed, taking a step back from him and away from his touch. She needed to focus in order to tell this. Then she began.
"My father married my aunt Carol about three years after she moved in with us to get away from her abusive husband and he died," Rita explained. "Her son, Simon, was five years older than me. He had serious anger issues. He...he abused me. More times than I like to think about." Luke's fist clenched, and his jaw twitched. She'd only told him about Simon touching her, and it had made him vocalize how much he wanted to kill the guy multiple times. It was, apparently, momentarily sidetracking him from her mentioning that she'd watched some sort of video.
"I was too young to understand what was happening. He'd hit me, shove me, strangle me...he tried to drown me once. He threatened to bury me alive if I ever told anyone. Sometimes he'd just tell me things he wanted to do to me in order to make me afraid."
Luke swore and looked away from her for a moment. Rita felt nauseous just talking about it again and remembering it all. When he looked back at her, the pain in his eyes was evident. Her heart sank. He really didn't know.
"That's why you're afraid of drowning," he said.
"Yes."
"Oh, Rita."
"Simon had a lot of anger inside of him. Eventually, he started to bully kids at school and left me alone, but I never knew if he'd just snap one day and start on me again. I was seven when he tried to drown me, and later, he came into my room and...and..."
"Rita," Luke said softly, his voice indicating he was feeling pain. She took in a shuddering breath and soldiered on.
"As you know, he only touched me twice...that time and another when I was eight, but it made me feel ashamed and confused. Carol found out after the second time, and Simon shot and killed her when she confronted him. My father basically kicked him out, and I never saw him again," she finished. She could see his mind spinning from all that information. She'd never told him all of this before. She didn't know why other than she'd just preferred to leave Simon in the past and didn't want to feel this way from talking about it.
"What is the endgame of this explanation, Rita?" he asked. She could tell he wanted to ask more about Carol, but he let it go.
"Simon changed his name to Alex Rosen and worked to get rid of his accent, or he at least got really good at an American accent. He became a whole new person. He showed up at your apartment one day." She watched his face change with understanding then anger.
"Alex was Simon? My partner on the force, Alex?"
"Yes."
"Why didn't you tell me?!"
"I didn't know until he came to the apartment. He told me that he'd kill you if I didn't leave and if I told you about him. He...he almost strangled me to make his point very clear that he'd kill me too. He told me it was only fair since he believed I made him get exiled after Carol died. I was afraid. Then I got pissed off, and I tried attacking him and lost. Then he showed me a video of you telling him I was a f***ing bitch and that you were going to dump me soon and wanted to put a bullet in me to straighten me out because I pissed you off so much."
"WHAT?!"
Rita stared at his flabbergasted face, and she started to feel anxious. He couldn't fake that level of shock.
"It really hurt me," she went on. "So on top of my fear, I was pissed and shattered, so it was easier for me to leave. It also didn't help that we were already having some troubles from doing long distance for a year and a half. A year and a half, Luke. It broke me no matter how hard I tried to stop it."
"Rita, I'm sorry," he said. "I was just..."
"Trying to keep me safe, I know," she interrupted. "And your gut feeling about Alex was right, so I can't fault you for that, but all that time and space from you put things in my head that I would never have thought if we were together. All of those things compiled into a huge thing when I heard you say those horrible words...it made it easier to believe it was true." She held his gaze, and he looked sad for a moment before growing a bit angry again.
"Where is this video?" he demanded. "I want to see it."
"Wait here," she said. She went to her barrack and dug it out from the bottom of her trunk. She hadn't really been sure why she'd packed it with her belongings. Maybe she knew all along she'd see him and finally show him and get some answers. She snagged a spare laptop and found Luke where she'd left him, and he was visibly angry now. She set down the laptop after turning it on and put the CD in to play it while he stood behind her to watch. When it was over, he stood there grinding his jaw.
"Luke," she started.
"That bastard," he cut her off.
"It's real..."
"I know it's real, but I'm not talking about you," he interrupted again. He jabbed his finger towards the screen. "The 'she' that I'm talking about here is my bloody squad car."
"Y-Your...your what?"
"My squad car."
"But..."
"The car was being a real bitch," Luke talked over her. "She...it...kept screwing with me, and I referred to it as a 'she' cos you know I refer to cars as girls. How many times did I tell you to not call Rosalee an 'it'? Anyway, Alex asked me about it, and I was pissed off cos the bloody thing wouldn't start that morning and made me miss a call and get yelled at by the captain, so I was ranting about it. I most certainly was not talking about you. Rita, I even told you about the damn car screwing with me."
"You weren't talking about me," she echoed, feeling faint. Alex/Simon had tricked her. She felt sick again suddenly. Then she did remember Luke talking about his car a few times and trying not to laugh at the faces and gestures he was making while ranting about it. How had she forgotten that? Had her fear, hurt, and pain really blinded her that much?
"How could you have even thought that I would talk about you like that?" he asked, sounding hurt now. "Did you really think that little of me?"
"I...I had barely seen you in so long, and I felt like you were distancing yourself from me. You didn't want me to move there, and I was starting to doubt that you loved me, I was starting to doubt everything..."
"Rita, I loved you...loved you. I would never, ever say anything like this about you. I can't believe you thought this was real."
"He made me believe it was real," she said quietly. "He told me I was the laughingstock of your precinct and that you talked shit about me all the time. Simon is the only person I'm terrified of, and regardless of that video and what he told me about you, he was going to kill me if I didn't leave and you just because he could."
"Rita," Luke groaned. "Of all the things to not tell me, that was the worst one."
"I'm sorry," she whispered. He gave her a pained look, and she realized how foolish she'd been to believe Simon/Alex. Luke would have kept her safe, kept himself safe. She shouldn't have believed a video that had so little context to it or that he'd be so cruel and talk shit about her to his colleagues. Then she knew she had to tell him the rest.
"He killed Dad, Luke."
"What?"
"At the farm. He was there that day. He said he killed my father," she said quietly. "Colter trained him."
"What?!" Luke swore and grabbed his head, closing his eyes and grinding his jaw. When he looked at Rita again, she could see the emotion there.
"If it's any consolation, Simon's dead," Luke told her. "I shot him. Well, Mei shot him first, but I finished it."
"He's dead?" she asked, feeling anguished almost. She'd hidden herself away, and he'd been dead. "How long?"
"Eight years now."
Rita felt tears pushing to come out now. She'd wasted all this time being angry and afraid, and she should have just talked to him. Why hadn't she talked to him? Her brain was going overtime. How could she have let her fear and anger make her do something so stupid? How could she have let Simon keep her afraid all this time? How could she have let herself mistrust and doubt Luke so much?
"I have to go," she said, moving past him. She went around the corner and tried to breathe. Her eyes and throat burned as she pressed a hand against her mouth. She barely heard his steps approaching her, and she shouldn't have been surprised that he followed her. His hand caught her arm and turned her around to face him, and she didn't fight him. She half-gasped, half-sobbed as his hand cupped the back of her head and pulled her into him to hold her.
"I'm sorry," she said against his shoulder. "I'm so sorry."
"Stop," he replied, holding her tight. "Stop apologizing." She put her hands on his chest and pushed back then, angry at herself for crying like this.
"I wasted all this time..." she tried. He stopped her with a kiss, grasping her face with his hands and running his thumbs across her tearstained cheeks. He rested his forehead against hers when he stopped, and she just stood there and let him, her eyes closed. Feeling his kiss again had thrown her a little.
"In the end, it was for the best," he said softly. "Because if you had stayed with me, Emile would have killed you."
She opened her eyes to see him looking at her. "Who's Emile?"
"That's a long story. I'll tell you; I promise."
She could tell it was a painful story for him, so she tucked it away to remind him of later.
"I did miss you," she said. "Every day. Despite how angry I was at you. You were my best friend."
"I missed you too."
She reached to smooth her hand along his face and jaw.
"Do you still love me?" she asked. He nodded slowly against her forehead, resting a hand on her waist and rubbing his thumb along her lower ribs lightly. Rita caught his lips with hers, pouring out the love for him that had never left her soul despite everything. When they came up for air a long while later, she was trembling. He held her arms in his hands, his face pressed against hers.
She kissed him again lightly, briefly. He picked her up into his arms, and she hugged his sides with her legs, linking her ankles together around his back to help keep her in place.
"I love you, Rita," he said.
"I love you so much," she said back, and she meant it. He touched her face and smiled. Then he grew serious again.
"It's time that you answered another question for me. Why are you really here, Rita?" Luke asked. She fidgeted. It was time to tell him her reason for being there. She'd wanted to tell him about this for so long. The only thing was that she feared he'd be so angry at her. She knew she'd be angry if roles were reversed.
"Rita?" he prompted.
"Brendan," she blurted out.
"Brendan," he repeated.
"My...our son," she answered. She slid to the ground out of his grasp as Luke looked at her, and before he could even speak, she felt the urgent need to fill in the blanks.
"I know I'm a shit," she started. "I'm the worst person in the world. I...I should have told you. I just...I didn't want Simon to hurt him either, if he found out about him, and I knew he would if I wasn't careful. Sometimes I feared he knew anyway. Then, when Brendan was about six, I felt guilty and decided to tell you. I found out you'd left the force and that you did fights in Jersey. I figured Simon wasn't around if you were doing that, so I could sneak and see you, but I was scared of getting caught the whole time I was there anyway. I got there only to find you with someone else, and I realized it was truly over, there was no going back to you, and you were completely fine without me, that you didn't care about or miss me. My anger took over again, and I left and didn't look back. I raised our son and told him you were working undercover and couldn't come home and he couldn't tell anyone about you in order to keep you safe, but it was really to keep Brendan safe. I didn't want anyone linking him to you and having Simon find out. Brendan knows all about you. He loves you. I'm so sorry, Luke. I shouldn't have done it. I shouldn't have kept him from you, but...I, I was so scared, and then I was so hurt that you'd moved on. I got angry at you all over again and felt stupid for trying to forget those horrible words you'd said about me on that disc, but it doesn't change the fact that we...we have a son." She stopped, out of breath. She looked at him, and he was still just looking at her. She expected him to yell. She expected him to be beyond furious. What she did not expect was the two words he said next.
"I know."
She opened and closed her mouth. She blinked.
"You know?" she asked, echoing him.
"Yes," he answered.
"H-How do you know?" Had she told him in a reset? She felt confused. She must have. She watched him reach into his jacket and pull out a folded picture. He opened it and held it up for her to see.
It was her first sonogram photo.
"Where did you get that?" she asked. She remembered being frantic with worry about where it had ended up. She had feared Simon would find it and know and then use it against her.
"Under the bed," he answered. "Remi swatted it out one day. Do you know that I drove myself mad with crazy thoughts that you'd left because it was either not my child and you'd run off to be with the father, you'd lost the baby, couldn't bear to tell me, and, for whatever reason, decided to leave me, or that you simply didn't want me to be a father and lead our child into the same line of work I was in?"
"I'm sorry," she whispered.
"I almost went mental," Luke said. "I didn't understand it."
"I was going to tell you that night," Rita said, her hands shaking. "I wanted to surprise you. I felt like an idiot for not realizing I was late to start with, and then you weren't able to see me for a while, and I wanted to tell you in person, not over the phone, so I waited. It almost killed me to wait, but I knew it'd be worth it to see your face when I told you. I wanted to be excited with you, together. But then Simon came...I didn't get into a physical fight with him because I was scared it would hurt the baby. I mean, I tried a little, but he was so much stronger than me, and I knew I couldn't fight back harder without the risk of our child getting hurt. And even though I know that, I still beat myself up for a long time for not fighting him back somehow. Yes, I was torn up and hurt by what he'd shared about what you said, but I also left because it wasn't just about me anymore. I couldn't let our child get killed by him too if he killed me. I...I left to save our son too."
"I really wish you had come to me," he said.
"I'm sorry," she said once more. "I...I tried to come tell you."
"I know. I saw you in the crowd, Rita," he said. "I followed you after you left. I found out where you were going. I went to your little house in Pittsfield, Illinois, and I saw our son playing on the front lawn."
Rita covered her mouth with her hands, feeling angst inside. Her stomach churned, and she almost felt like she could throw up. She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment before opening them again to see his calm expression. She was very sure now he was just repeating a conversation they'd already had, but she appreciated he was acting like it was the first time they'd had it.
"I had to be sure he was my son, so I waited for you to go to work and take him to school, and I went through the house and found your journals."
"Luke," she whispered. She'd never written about Simon in those journals. They'd only ever been for Luke to read one day. What had started off as trying to document their son's first year of life turned into a saga of each year passing.
"I sat in his room for hours after reading that I was indeed his father, feeling hurt and angry and sad...betrayed. Confused. I wanted to yell at you so badly, and I almost stayed until you got home, but then I realized it was for the best that neither of you were in my life. No one from my past could hurt you, and my son could grow up wanting to be something other than what I was. He'd be free of my influence, which was what I figured you were trying to avoid by leaving me. Walking out of that house was one of the hardest things I'd ever done, but I did it to avoid hurting him. I'd assumed you told him I was dead, and I thought it was better to leave it at that, that I wouldn't have been a very good father anyway. Even though I regretted making that choice, in the end, it was the right one. Emile didn't know about either of you, so he couldn't take you away from me. I guess Alex knew about you, but I didn't know that."
"You knew," she echoed absently, still stuck on that fact.
"I was really hurt too, Rita, for a while, but I pushed past it," he finished.
"You knew," Rita said again. "You saw him..." She looked at him. "Can you ever forgive me, Luke?"
"I already have," he said softly. "More than once."
"If I could do it over again..."
"I know," he stopped her. "I know."
She stood there unsure how to feel. She must have said similar things to this hundreds of times to him. He forgave her for it, and she felt like she didn't deserve it but was eternally grateful at the same time.
"He's a good ball player," Luke commented, making her gape at him.
"How did you-?"
"I'm a ghost, Rita," he interrupted, scoffing a little. "Or did you forget that about me? I came and went off and on to watch him once I'd dealt with Emile and Alex...once I was confident no one was after me anymore. Actually, it was Mei who convinced me to go see him. I'd told her I wasn't the fatherly type because I had made myself believe that for so long, but then she found that sonogram, and she wouldn't let up until I told her about him. Then she wouldn't let up until I went to see him."
"I can't believe this," she said. "But...who is Emile?" She had to know.
"I got targeted by the Russian mob in 2012, led by Emile Docheski," Luke went on. "My back story was fake, so they got all the wrong information, and obviously Alex had to keep the knowledge of you to himself for blackmail against you and possibly me, so he didn't tell them, not that he knew the Russians were after me to start with. We'd parted ways long before that."
"And you know Mei?" she asked, realizing. Well, a small part of her had suspected Mei's friend Luke was Rita's Luke when she'd shared about him, but she'd done her best to convince herself otherwise.
"Yes. Emile had gone after her too, and I put a stop to it."
Rita very much wanted to know more about this story, but she sensed he wasn't ready to tell it all just yet. She also sensed that he'd probably already told her.
"Did you know Brendan joined the UDF?" she asked.
"Not at first, but when I couldn't find him, I suspected he signed up."
"You knew that's why I came here," she said. "You just were making me come clean so you could tell me you already knew about him."
He just smiled, and she wanted to hit him, but she also felt immense relief that he already knew and wasn't angry anymore. Or, at least, was less angry than he was before.
"We've had this conversation more than once," he advised. "But this is the first time you've included why you left...about Simon."
"Oh." She felt slightly aggravated that there was so much he remembered of their conversations that she never could.
"It's the first time I understand that you left to save him...you sacrificed me to save him, not that what I said helped at all in the equation," he added. Rita bit her lip lightly. She had known in her heart that she'd truly left to protect Brendan more than herself, and Luke was right. She'd sacrificed him to do so, but she'd wrongly believed he was done with her anyway, so it didn't feel like a sacrifice at the time.
"I always wondered why you'd come to Jersey...if it was just to tell me about him or what...but you cleared that up for me early on in my resets when I pressed you for the answer."
"I did?" she asked.
"Yea. You told me you had come because you still loved me."
She closed her eyes briefly. She'd apparently been brutally honest in his resets. Go figure. "You came over here to find me?"
"When I heard Brendan had signed up for the UDF, I knew you would, too, to find him. Rachel confirmed it..."
"And you came," Rita stated, finishing for him. He'd talked to Rachel? She hadn't for a long time because she figured if Simon knew she lived in New Orleans, then he knew about Rachel, and she didn't want to put her friend at risk either. Then she'd reached out to say goodbye before coming here because she'd missed her, and Rachel had been a good friend to her after all. She'd talked to Kenny and Lucy on the phone, but she hadn't told them she was going to fight. She hadn't wanted them to worry about her.
"I did. I would have been here sooner if I'd known. I thought you'd both gone into hiding when I couldn't find you at first until I found out otherwise, but it worked out for the best because Mei was too young to be left alone anyway. I thought about leaving her with Kenny and Lucy, but she didn't want to do that."
"It also worked out better that you came now and got the power when you did," she reasoned, and he nodded.
"He's a cool kid," Luke said next, referring to Brendan. "Great sense of humor. Smart as a whip."
"How do you know that?"
"I talked to him."
"What?!" Her eyes bore into his. She was stunned and slightly annoyed that Luke had kept this information to himself until now. Then again, he might have told her lots of times...she would never remember. But Brendan...he'd kept it from her too. That was a blow that he could keep something that big from her, but she realized he probably felt the same way about her for keeping Luke's whereabouts a secret. It would definitely explain some of his moodiness and anger towards her at times, not that he was that way a lot. It had always felt out of nowhere when it did arise, and now she knew why. It also explained the "boy" from his games he talked about hanging out with afterwards sometimes that she never met. It had been Luke every time. The more she thought about it, the more she realized Brendan had shared about these visits while keeping it very general, so he probably thought he wasn't entirely lying.
"He caught me at one of his games. I couldn't lie to him cos he'd seen my picture," Luke told her. "He knew I was his father. I will say I was surprised he believed I was alive and not dead like my original assumption."
"When?"
"2015."
Rita pressed a hand into her face, trying to wrap her head around this. Her son had met Luke. Her son hadn't told her. He'd met Luke five years ago.
"I did tell you," he said. "During the resets. You also told me some stories."
"Oh."
"He lied about his age to join, right? When he was 15?"
"Yes. He always looked older than he was. He always wanted to look out for the little guy and fight for them. He left me a note, telling me where he'd gone. He had given it to a friend to give to me so it would be too late to stop him." She looked at him being so calm, and she wondered what he knew.
"I know he's alive," Luke said on cue. "You told me."
"He is," she confirmed. Brendan had been wounded but not gravely. He was in a hospital in Italy. She hadn't been able to see or talk to him since the base had gone into lockdown right after she found out. She'd been lucky to even find out he was there; it aggravated her she hadn't been able to talk to him. It had been Travis's contact that had come through in the end and told her. She'd never felt such relief at hearing her son was alive. She'd believed for too long that he was dead, and it had hardened her.
"I thought I was going to get lost in that darkness again," she went on, "but when they told me he was alive, I felt a sliver of hope. Then you showed up...the one person who could make me feel like everything would be okay." She gave him a sad look. She still felt bad for keeping their son from him.
"Why would you insist on me letting you die every reset with the chance of never coming back?" Luke asked. "If you knew our son was out there waiting for you to come back?" She didn't really know the answer, but she gathered it would have been to save Brendan.
"I imagine it's because I would have wanted to win this war so he could have a life," she replied. "I was willing to be that sacrifice for him. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I was the key to eradicating the Mimics and didn't do it...if I was the one thing standing in the way of our son's chance to live." She'd hardened with war outside of her belief her son was dead. She'd be the first to admit it. Watching her team die every day had made her a bit cold to the concept of death near the end despite the fact it still scared her, and losing Travis forever had been the final nail. Her words made her think of her father and his sacrificing himself for her. She understood it now.
"Like father, like daughter," Luke said, reading her mind.
"I'm sorry," she said again. Luke caught her face with his hand, and she was surprised when he kissed her.
"You're still angry at me for not telling you," she pointed out when he pulled back, searching his eyes with hers.
"Yea, but I also love you and understand why now, not that it makes any sense. You know I would have dealt with Ale-...Simon. And you know me better than to ever believe I'd be so cruel to you behind your back like that."
"I let fear and anger keep me trapped. He's the only one who could ever make me feel so afraid..."
"He can't hurt you anymore," Luke said quietly. "I promise."
"I love you," she whispered, gripping his arms tightly with her hands. It felt so good to say it out loud again. He gave a small smile and kissed her softly again. She grabbed the front of his jacket, pulling him into her. When they stopped, she almost cried again. How could she have wasted all this time?
"I should have trusted you more," she said, still beating herself up for everything. "I should have gone to you. I'm sorry. I just felt so distanced from you at the time, like you were keeping me at arm's length by not having me move there with you, and I let my own negative thoughts take over and make me believe you'd changed. I thought having a baby might change things, but despite being excited to tell you, I was also nervous to tell you. I didn't want you to think I'd planned it to make you quit."
"I would have quit," Luke told her. "If you'd told me about our son, I would have quit and been a family, and not because of thinking you'd planned it but because I would have wanted to." Somehow, this made it hurt worse, but she couldn't dwell on that.
"I should have told you about Simon," she said again. "Right after."
"We'll never know what would have happened if you had told me, good or bad," he said, touching her cheek, "but we had this time together, and I wouldn't trade that for anything. And I mean it: I forgive you. Do you forgive me for letting us drift apart in my absence? I never should have let that happen, and I'll be sorry for that forever." She pressed her lips together and nodded, stopping her tears as best as she could.
"Yes," she said. "I forgive you." She felt his fingers reach for her chain and pull it up out from under her shirt. He twisted the wedding band in his fingers slowly, and she watched him look at it.
"I am very fortunate Emile didn't find out about you," he said, "that my fake story was bought so easily and that Alex didn't share that information with anyone."
"I'm sorry," she said again, pressing a hand to his cheek. He just smiled.
"Brendan, eh?" he asked. She nodded. "Brendan Wright."
"Brendan Luke Lancelot Wright," she corrected. He gave a slight chuckle. She'd reversed his own first and middle names and added her father's.
"You kept his fake name?"
"I learned it was his grandfather's name, that he changed to it from Harry after retiring," she replied. She'd found a letter from her father among the things she'd packed up from the house right before coming over to fight with the UDF. It had been amongst items she'd salvaged from the farm house years ago. It had made her cry. It hadn't told her everything, but it had told her enough. Vrataski had been the last name of one of his childhood best friends he'd lost, so he'd adopted it as his own. Rita had decided to keep it, and she'd started using it again during the war because she figured if Simon wanted to come get her over here, then let him try. She didn't want to use any fake names here; she also figured she was going to die over here anyway, so it wouldn't matter.
"Interesting. Lancelot, huh?"
"It's probably why he loved King Arthur."
Luke chuckled again. He dropped her ring against her chest and took a step back. She was pulling something out of her pocket, handing it to him when it was free. He took it gingerly, his breath catching in his throat. His son was looking back at him. He was about 15 in the photo.
"He has your eyes," Rita said softly.
"Your mouth," Luke noted. "Your dad's nose."
"Your mother's smile," Rita added, knowing this from a photo he had of her, and he could see it. Jess Wright's beaming smile lived on in the grandson she'd never meet. He went to hand it back to her when she stopped him.
"Keep it," she said. "I owe you so much more, but that's a start." He smoothed a thumb over it, nodding slowly.
"Thank you," he said.
"Don't thank me," she said, shaking her head. "I should never have kept him from you."
"You only thought you did," he corrected.
"Now that I know Simon is dead, I can stop calling him Brendan Woods," she said. "He can officially have your last name."
"I'd like that." He smiled. "Woods, huh?"
"Yea," she chuckled. It had been one of her fake I.D. names when she'd gone traveling with him on his jobs. She'd used it to keep Brendan under the radar from Simon.
"Rose Woods was one of my favorites," he said, still smiling. She flushed a little, remembering. She'd used her middle name as her first and Woods because she'd used to love wandering them when she was younger. She cleared her throat.
"Brendan was mad at me," she said. "He found out my real name, and we got into it. It was one of the last conversations we had before he left. I felt bad for lying to him, but he left me a note saying he understood why I'd done it. I guess now I know his apology was also for more than just our fight. He was apologizing for knowing about you and not telling me."
"I'm sorry too," Luke said. "I should never have thought that was a good idea. I just didn't want to hurt you further." She didn't know what else to say, so she just nodded.
"You seem like you have something else on your mind," Rita noted, looking at him and noticing something else in his eyes.
"I...it's dumb," he replied.
"Now I'm really curious," she said. "You have to tell me."
"Do not."
"Do too. Tell me!" she ordered, reaching to shove him playfully. He laughed.
"Alright," he caved. "It was after I died the last time. I found myself in a field with Keira." He looked at her, and she felt a pang inside that went deep.
"Oh," she said.
"You were there too."
"I was?" She thought hard, but she was unable to recall it.
"Yea. She told us she was okay," Luke advised. "I've never felt more at peace about it than I do right now. She gave us permission to be okay...to not blame ourselves."
"That sounds really nice," Rita said, swallowing her tears.
"It was," Luke agreed, reaching to take her hand in his. "I just wanted you to know that."
"Thank you for telling me, and it wasn't dumb at all," she stated. He smiled lopsidedly at her.
"Sergeant Vrataski!" someone called.
"I gotta go," she said.
"Hey," he said before she moved away from him. "I told you we'd make it through."
"We did," she replied, her eyes growing a bit wet again. She cleared her throat.
"See you later," he promised, touching her face. She smiled and pressed her hand against his before pulling away and walking towards where the person calling her name was.
...
Luke stood there for a moment after Rita left, and he did his best to tame his racing thoughts. She'd left because Alex had threatened to kill her and him if she didn't. She'd left because she'd believed he'd actually said those horrible things about her and mocked her to his team and didn't want to fight for their relationship after that. She'd left to save their child. He felt such rage towards a man who was already dead. He wished he could bring him back to life so he could beat the piss out of him before killing him again. He wished he had gotten the chance to fight him for a bit before Mei shot him down in order to save him.
He felt a little bit angry towards Rita again too. How could she actually believe that he'd call her those names and talk that way about her? How could she have let Alex terrify her to the point of running away? Hadn't he taught her anything in all those lessons she demanded he give her? How could she not have trusted that he could keep them safe? In the end, he sighed and dropped his hands to his sides. He wasn't her. He hadn't been in her position. He hadn't been abused by Alex as a kid like she had to know what being afraid of him was like. He understood she'd been protecting their child by not fighting back. He also knew Alex's power. Everyone had said the only person who could ever kill him was Alex, and they were right. If Mei hadn't shot him...well, he didn't like to think about that very often.
Simon. His name was Simon. That was going to take some getting used to.
He thought about how she'd gone so long thinking Brendan was dead. It was no wonder she'd hardened herself and was struggling so bad. It was no wonder she'd grown cold and detached herself from people, viewing them as just soldiers. She'd had to in order to survive, but then she'd found out Brendan was alive, and Luke came along immediately after, and she was struggling with all of her emotions again, especially when thinking they weren't going to survive the war at all. He didn't know what was going to happen next, but he wanted her to know that he was not going anywhere. He was not losing her again.
He thought back to the first time he'd talked to Rita about Brendan. It had been in his first few resets, and he'd challenged her on why she was there. It had surprised him how quick she was to cave and tell him about their son, but it made sense with her feelings of hopelessness about the war...she'd wanted to tell him before they died. She had started to tell him before he killed the Omega, and he'd told her then that he'd known. He could still remember her face when she apologized to him before running away to her death.
He recalled Rita asking him if he had any kids the first time, and he hadn't lied. He didn't have kids with Annie. The next time she'd asked, he'd told her he did with her. She'd hit him for smirking afterwards. Brendan usually came up at some point in their resets, and sometimes he didn't say anything to see what would happen. It made him realize that it was probably what had altered her moods at times: her thinking he didn't know when he actually did. It was finally all out now, and there was no resetting to make him have the same conversation again. What a relief.
He went to find Mei, feeling such relief that she was still alive. He stood outside where he knew she'd come out and waited. Five minutes later, she showed up.
"Luke!" she exclaimed before growing red in the face. "I...I..."
He said nothing as he grabbed her and pulled her into a tight embrace. She gave a slight yelp at the force of it but then hugged him back. When they pulled apart, she looked up at him.
"I'm sorry," she started, but he held up his hand.
"It's a very long story, but I already know why you're here," he said.
"H-How do you know?"
"Come on," he said, gesturing with his head. "Let's take a walk." She fell into step beside him, and he told her about resetting the day and winning the war. She was in awe by the time he was finished.
"You watched all of us die?" she asked. "Luke, that must have been so hard..."
"It was," he agreed. "But here we are." He smiled, and she smiled back.
"So...what happens now?"
"We go out and take care of the now defenseless Mimics," he replied. "Then we go home."
"Perfect," she said with a grin. "And Rita? Did you get what you really came here for?"
"She comes home too," he answered softly, confirming her question without really answering it. Mei reached to touch his arm lightly.
"Did you hear anything about your son?"
"Yes. He'll be with us soon."
"You got your family back," she said.
"I did." He left out everything else. He had no idea if he and Rita could pick up where they'd left off or if they had to start over. He had no idea if Rita wanted to try again. That thought really hurt, but he would understand if she didn't. They'd gone so long apart, and she'd believed for all that time that he'd been so hurtful towards her. That would take some time to shift in her mind, he was sure.
"Hey, Mei!" someone shouted.
"Ugh, Rocky," Mei said, rolling her eyes. "I gotta go deal with him. I'll see you later?"
"Yea."
"Promise you're not mad?"
"Not anymore."
"Okay," she said, smiling again. She clapped his arm playfully and ran to join the young lad who had called for her. Luke watched them talking as they walked away. He twisted his lips into a smile. His young friend was all grown up.
He went to find J-Squad, suddenly needing to be around camaraderie.
...
Rita found Dr. Carter once her superiors were finished with her. She told him what happened, and he hugged her and rejoiced with her.
"I knew I wasn't crazy," he said, grinning.
"I never thought you were."
"I know, but all of them did."
"Well, maybe one day you can prove to them they were wrong," Rita said.
"Maybe."
She said her goodbyes to him and went to find Luke once more. She felt her ring bouncing against her chest as she walked. It had stayed there for years, and she looked forward to putting it back on her finger. That is, if Luke wanted her to. She still felt afraid that he'd tell her there was too much pain to have a relationship again. She didn't know how to feel at the thought of not being in a relationship with him. Once she fully understood he wasn't talking about her in that stupid video, it was easier to let it go, although perhaps a small part of her had never fully believed it anyway, which also made it easier. She didn't know.
Then she thought about Brendan again. He was alive. He was safe. That had been what kept her going the last while. She itched to see him, annoyed that they couldn't ship him over from where he was faster, that she still couldn't call him because, for whatever reason, they were still on lockdown.
She found Luke throwing knives at a makeshift board away from people. She was surprised her team wasn't there with him, but they were still off celebrating with everyone else. She leaned against the side of the building and crossed her arms.
"I can feel your eyes boring a hole into my skull," he said without looking at her.
"She's still got it," Rita teased about herself. He laughed.
"You never lost it," he replied. He threw his knife and turned to look at her. "Come on, then. Put me to shame." She pushed off the wall and took the knife he offered. She aimed and threw, hitting the bull's eye easily.
"Did I put you to shame?" she asked. He looped an arm around her lower back, pulling her in and making her exclaim in surprise.
"Not yet," he answered, kissing her soundly. She gripped him tightly, feeling afraid that he'd disappear on her.
"I have to attend some meetings," she told him after. "I'll see you tonight, though."
"Alright."
She let him kiss her again, and she pushed away all thoughts of Simon and everything else. She let herself be in this moment with him.
It was a moment she'd waited so long to have again.
...
Luke waited for her after she finished her meetings, and they went to the mess hall. Everyone there was celebrating and drinking and shouting. Since it was a celebration, some alcohol had been brought out and served in moderation. No one cared. They found a table near the back and did their best to tune out the noise. He watched her sip her water and eat her food, and he wondered what she was thinking.
"'R'," she read, looking at his wrist.
"Yea," he replied with a smile. "Something to remember you by, not that I needed it. It was just comforting to see is all." He knew that she recognized it because she'd been the one to design it all those years ago after all.
"How come you didn't put 'L' on the other wrist?" she asked, her eyes twinkling. "Left and Right. Luke and Rita."
"I didn't want people to think I couldn't remember what side both arms were," he joked. "It was bad enough people thought I couldn't remember which arm was my right arm." She laughed a little. Then she grew serious again.
"Where do we go from here?" she asked suddenly, looking at him.
"What do you mean?" He knew what she meant, but he wanted her to say it. He wanted to know what she was thinking.
"I mean, it's all out in the open now, and I have no idea what you're thinking," she answered. She looked a little worried, and he suddenly understood that she feared his decision about their relationship. He reached to take her hand in his, turning it over so he could trace her palm with his finger.
"I'm thinking that it's all so long ago, and we shouldn't waste anymore time being angry or hurt or scared," he said, looking into her eyes.
"I feel so stupid," she started, but he stopped her.
"Rita, you were threatened and bullied. Your emotions were running high, you heard something that sounded credible that fueled the fire of your pre-existing doubts, and you wanted to keep our child safe. While I'm hurt you thought I could do that to you and that you couldn't trust me, I also understand why it made sense to you in that moment. Your cousin was a very crafty human being, and he put you where he wanted you."
"I felt like that helpless little girl again," Rita said, her voice shaking slightly. "He just made all my thoughts get so twisted and tangled...I couldn't make anything make sense anymore. And then...then I just let the hurt take over." Luke sensed something else she wasn't telling him, and he felt a little afraid suddenly.
"Did he hurt you?" he asked. "That day at the apartment?"
"Aside from choking me?"
"Yes." That thought still made him burn inside. He hated Alex/Simon that much more. Rita was quiet and pressed a hand against her cheek. Luke felt the rage surfacing again at the idea that Alex/Simon had raped his wife.
"He threatened it," she answered finally, looking at him again. "He didn't, though."
"I really want to kill him all over again but slower this time," Luke commented, clenching his other fist on the table.
"You really want to try again?" she asked, changing the subject. "Being us?"
"Rita, in my mind, we never stopped being an 'us.' I just went with the idea that we were on pause."
"But...Annie," she said, confused, "wasn't she...weren't you and her...?" Luke made a sound in his throat.
"No," he answered.
"No?" she asked, her tone full of despair. "But..."
"She was...work related," Luke said.
"Work related? As in...?"
"As in someone I had promised to help keep safe," Luke said. "Cos that's what I do, you know. Not that I held up my end of the deal since Emile..." He sighed roughly and looked away before looking back at her. "I can't go there right now." It still bothered him greatly that not only had he failed to save Annie, her unborn child was killed too. He never knew who the father was. He hadn't even known she was pregnant until Vassily told him.
"It's okay," she said. She fidgeted with her beer label for a moment. "I feel so stupid now for assuming..."
"Rita, you couldn't have known. It's okay."
"I'm sorry."
"Stop apologizing," he said. "You're soon going to make a drinking game out of it."
"Luke!"
He laughed, and she smiled slowly, unable to stay annoyed with him. He reached to touch her cheek gently.
"You know," she said, "Hendricks kept telling me to forgive you, to ask you about the video. He said there were two sides to every story and that I needed to hear yours. He constantly made me promise to tell you about Brendan and to forgive you."
Luke watched her swallow and work her jaw a little to keep from crying. She cleared her throat after a moment.
"I had made a promise to myself that if I survived the war, I'd find you and tell you what happened. Then I heard you signed up and could possibly be here, and I felt so confused. I was in such turmoil over what to do because I still loved you but I was mad at you."
"I know," he said, a small smile on his lips. "You thoroughly enjoyed shooting me in the face almost every single day."
"In all those resets, I never told you?" she asked.
"Not about why you left, but you did tell me about Brendan a lot of the time if I didn't bring him up."
"Oh."
"You hated it that I always knew," he said with a smirk. She rolled her eyes.
"I didn't actually know you were at this base until today," she said. "When you came to see me."
"I gathered that."
"How was I with you? For the most part?" she asked, changing the subject.
"Angry at times. Emotional in others. Loving in the rest."
"I don't really know what to feel right now."
"I know."
She didn't say anything else for a bit, and Luke simply waited. He knew they would need time to rediscover how to be together again, but their underlying friendship was still there. He could feel it.
"Do you still snore when you're exhausted?" she asked.
"I never did that," he retorted.
"Yes, you did!"
"No, your father did that. I don't snore."
"It was like a duck being strangled," she countered, lifting her hand to imitate squeezing with her fingers.
"It was not."
"It was!"
"You were the one trying to suck in the drapes at night," he insisted. "I literally pinched your nose repeatedly one time, and you didn't even wake up."
"I don't snore," Rita said firmly, feeling a laugh building. "Don't turn this around on me!"
"You did it in and out," Luke went on. "Then at the end of your exhale, you made that old man sound with your lips, puffing out the air."
"I didn't!"
And on it went, their teasing and back and forth jabs to each other. Luke was laughing before too long, as was she. It felt like old times, and that was what he'd desperately craved for so long.
Rita was resting her chin on her hand and smiling at him when he remembered. He reached into his side pocket after unzipping it and pulled out the ring he'd held onto for so long. He rested his elbow on the table, holding it up in his fingers for her to see, and her eyes widened in shock.
"You found it," she said, almost whispering. "Where did you find it?"
"Under the dresser."
"I never thought I'd see it again," she confessed. He reached to take her hand while still holding the ring in his other.
"Do you, Rita Vrataski, still want to be my wife?" he asked. He watched her struggle not to cry, succeeding but barely just.
"Very much so," she answered, gripping his fingers tightly with hers. He smiled as he slid it back onto her finger. Then she was up and leaning over the table gripping his face with her hand and kissing him.
"Whoa!" a voice called, making her pull back suddenly. "Did you just get engaged, Sarge?!"
"Since when were you even dating? Or even had time to date?" a second voice asked, sounding outraged. Luke turned to see Rita's squad coming to join them. Harvey and Pete had been the ones to speak. Kamden's eyes were wide with his brows high.
"Kamden, Pete, and Harvey," Rita said. "This is my husband, Luke."
"The Private is your husband?!" Kamden exclaimed.
"The Private used to be a black ops assassin, so you'd best choose your next words wisely," Luke warned, his tone slightly amused.
"Yea, I can see it," Harvey said, looking back and forth between Luke and Rita. "You two definitely belong together. You've got that same sarcasm thing going on."
"She got it from me," Luke insisted.
"I did not," Rita retorted. "You copied me."
"You wish."
"Honeymoon's over," Pete chuckled. "Marital spats already."
Luke just smiled as the team crowded next to Rita and ribbed her about being an old married woman. She started to argue with them, putting them in their place. Then he left to get another drink, and Pete broke away and followed him.
"Long time no see," he commented.
"Yes," Luke agreed. Flashes of memories from his time in Australia went through his mind.
"You always were a quiet guy," Pete said. "Then you disappeared and Brendan was found dead. People said you'd killed him."
"My step-father killed him," Luke advised. "Brendan was my biological father. He brought me there to try and give me a normal life away from being an assassin."
"Wow," Pete said, giving his head a slight shake. "You really don't know people, eh?"
"No."
"We're all connected somehow," Pete said next, looking at Harvey, Kamden, and Rita still carrying on together at the table.
"I'm sorry about Randy," Luke offered.
"Me too, mate," Pete sighed. "All we can do is carry on forward with the pieces we have left." Luke didn't say anything else, but he knew Pete wasn't looking for a response. He watched as Rita laughed and slugged Kamden in the shoulder hard, making him rub it and exclaim that he hadn't been ready. He smiled.
There was no other place he'd rather be.
Days Later
They were out on a battlefield, taking care of the now frozen Mimics. Luke still felt a bit unnerved at being so close to them. He felt as if they'd jump to life again and slaughter him. It was a feeling he was trying to overcome.
He looked over at Rita hacking away at them, a look of pure glee on her face at being able to do so, and he smiled.
"What?" she asked, seeing him watching as she stomped a Mimic after knocking it down.
"Just you," he answered. She smiled. He liked seeing her happy. He knew they had a lot ahead of them still, but he had hope.
He saw her face, and he knew she was thinking of Brendan.
...
Rita was beginning to lose patience at how long it was taking to get Brendan to the base. She wanted to see him. She wanted to hug him and smack him, scold him and tell him how much she loved him, and never let him out of her sight again.
She was working alongside Luke as they helped take down the immobilized Mimics. They left the Alpha's alone, just in case. Dr. Carter was allowed to examine them since he was suddenly deemed important again. Rita had made sure of that in her own way, citing other reasons to accomplish that. No one knew that it was Luke and Rita using the Alpha's blood that had saved the day, and they kept it that way.
Rita felt sucker punched suddenly, thinking about her son and all the time she'd wasted keeping him away from Luke.
"Rita?" Luke asked, resting a hand on her back. "Are you okay?"
"No," she answered, shaking her head. "I'm not."
"Don't go there," he said softly, reading her mind. "I did get some time with him."
"But you missed everything else," she whispered.
"It's really okay, love," he promised.
Rita did her best to breathe and believe him, and he smoothed her cheek with his thumb. They weren't doing public displays of affection greater than this, either, so no one would know and comment. Her team had promised to keep it to themselves.
They continued working until the day was over. As they trudged back to base, Rita caught sight of a commotion between Farell and someone else.
"I need to speak with her," they were demanding.
"I'm sorry, son, you can't come onto this base."
"I got sent to this bloody base!"
"We still have to follow procedures."
"I don't bloody care! They sent me here, so I'm going in!"
Rita stopped in her tracks, finally getting a good glimpse of the young man arguing with Farell. She reached and latched her hand onto Luke's arm so tightly he grunted.
"What?" he asked, looking around and trying to discover what was distracting her. She didn't answer. Instead, she let him go and started to run towards them.
"BRENDAN!" she shouted, and the young man whipped around to see her. Then he was running towards her, and they crashed together moments later, laughing and crying.
"Mum," he said over and over. "Mum."
"Oh my God, Brendan," Rita said, clutching him to her and rocking him while saying his name over and over before pushing back to examine him closely. Then: "What the hell were you thinking?!"
"I just wanted to do some good."
Rita cuffed him, and he winced but smiled at the same time. She grasped his face with her hands and took all of him in. He had a scar across his right arm just under his sleeve, his left forearm was in a cast, and his eyes looked exhausted, but he was her son, and he was alive.
"I'm sorry," he said to her. "I'm sorry for getting so mad before I left about your name. It ate me up inside thinking that's how you'd remember me."
"Oh, Bren," she said, smoothing her hand across his face. "I wouldn't have. And it's okay. I'm sorry too, for everything."
"It's okay." He smiled at her, and then she remembered.
"Brendan," she said, letting him go and turning to see Luke standing off to the side watching them. "I believe you know your father."
"Dad!" Brendan exclaimed happily. He jogged over to Luke, who wrapped him in a tight bear hug instantly. Rita felt emotional just watching this. Their family was finally all together. She turned to see Farell staring at all of them with a bemused expression, and when their eyes met. For a moment, she could see the envy there, the longing to have the same reunion she was having, and she felt bad for him. In the end, though, he just chuckled and shook his head before walking away. She walked towards her son and husband and squished Brendan in the middle, her hands holding Luke's back tightly.
"Don't you ever sign up for a war underage again," Luke chastised, cuffing Brendan fondly.
"Ow," he laughed. "Okay."
They broke apart, and Luke slung an arm around Brendan's neck as they walked towards the base. Rita knew that no one was going to deny the Full Metal Bitch's son access to the base now.
"You got a really cool nickname, Mum," Brendan commented, seeing the sign.
"I better have," she retorted. "It took a lot to get it." She slid an arm around Brendan's waist and hooked her finger into Luke's pant pocket, connecting them all again. She saw Mei coming towards them after a moment, and Luke moved to release Brendan and hugged her tightly too.
"I'm so glad you found him," Rita heard her say to Luke.
"Me too."
"Who's that?" Brendan asked, raising a brow. "She's hot."
"Brendan!" Rita scolded, cuffing him once more. "She's practically your adopted sister."
"Awww really?"
"Mei, Brendan," Luke said, gesturing. "Brendan, Mei."
"Hi," Brendan said, his eyes twinkling. Mei blushed. Rita rolled her eyes and shook her head, but she was smiling. They started talking as they walked away together, and Luke slid his hand into Rita's as they followed slowly.
"He is definitely your son," she commented.
"Why's that?"
"Look at him!" she said, gesturing at Brendan's shameless flirting with Mei.
"Are you implying that I behaved that way?" Luke asked.
"You definitely did, and you know it."
"I was more subtle than that...give me some credit. And you were the one who touched me every chance you got," he corrected. "You were always staring at me, drooling..."
She gave him a shove, and he laughed while fending off her smacks. He hooked an arm around her waist after a moment and pulled her into him to kiss her. She pushed him back seconds later.
"Luke!" she chastised, looking around. No one was paying any attention.
"I don't care," he reasoned, kissing her again. Rita went along with it because if she was honest, she didn't care either.
"It really is awkward watching your parents make out," Brendan said, making them pull apart quickly. "I always wondered."
Luke got to him first, grabbing his head and giving it a playful shake before pushing him forward. Rita walked behind them as they tussled and felt like her heart might burst. For once, it was looking like a happy ending.
She really could use that.
...
Luke was sitting in the mess hall watching Brendan talking with Pete, Harvey, and Kamden while Mei and Rita were engaged in a conversation about hand to hand combat tactics. The J-Squad was rowdy as usual, making Farell constantly shout at them to settle down, but his voice gave away his amusement and lack of seriousness, so he was ignored.
"Hey, Dad," Brendan said now, having broken away from the others. "Can we take a walk?"
"Sure."
Luke reached to touch Rita's back as he walked by her. She looked up at him and gave a smile, understanding he was going to be with their son for a bit.
"This was really scary," Brendan commented as they walked side by side in the night air.
"It was."
"I'm sorry I scared you and Mum," he went on. "I just felt so restless back home thinking that if I didn't go and help win, we'd lose and suffer badly. I looked older than I was, so they didn't question me."
"I see."
Luke thought about the last conversation he'd had with Brendan before his son disappeared. It had been about college and a girl he liked and whether or not they should tell Rita that Luke knew about him. The plan had been to tell her soon, but then the war started.
"I was a pilot," Brendan said proudly. "They said I was damn good too."
"I bet you were," Luke agreed. Then he felt a bit puzzled. "Who taught you to fly?"
"Mum's friend," Brendan answered. "He was so cool."
Luke felt very intrigued as to who this friend was. He made a mental note to ask her later.
"How did you and Mum sort things out?" Brendan asked, looking at him. Luke smiled at his son. It did feel a little strange to be with him out in the open without worrying they'd get caught.
"I was persistent," Luke answered, his tone teasing.
"Clearly. I always knew she missed you," Brendan added. "She'd get sad talking about you." Luke knew that Brendan had been very surprised to see him the day he'd spotted him in the crowd at his ball game, and he'd felt bad for them deciding together to keep it a secret from Rita that they saw each other, but he hadn't wanted to cause any further damage to their relationship. He'd respected that she hadn't wanted to see him again even though it almost killed him inside.
"She looks haunted," Brendan continued. "I think this war really did a number on her."
"Losing you is what did that," Luke chastised lightly. "But it didn't help that she lived over 300 extra days of it."
"Whoa, what?!"
Luke explained it all to his son, and Brendan was flabbergasted by the end of it. He kept saying "holy shit" over and over again.
"So that's how we won?" Brendan asked finally once he'd calmed down.
"Yes, but nobody knows that."
"I won't say anything," Brendan promised, understanding. They reached the main gate and stopped walking. Luke looked at his son and felt proud of him.
"So what happens now?" Brendan asked. "Are you coming home with us?"
"That's the plan," Luke answered.
"Wicked," Brendan said with a grin. Luke reached to pull him into a sideways hug, and Brendan laughed as he ducked getting his head noogied. He pushed off and straightened his jacket while Luke thought about what the future would hold for them all. He listened to Brendan chatter about everything he experienced before ending up in the hospital, and when they reached the mess hall again, Luke saw Rita coming out to look for them. He smiled at her grin, happy that she wasn't drowning in angst, anger, or fear anymore.
"Hey, Mum," Brendan said as she reached to touch his arm. Luke accepted her hand in his, feeling warmth inside as her fingers interlocked with his. He moved to kiss the side of her head lightly before they moved to the barracks.
Finally, he had his family back. He couldn't be happier.
I hope that helps give more clarity as to why Rita left, too, aside from thinking Luke was done with her and being scared of Simon...I didn't want to risk revealing that twist too much in the last chapter. And yes, I've given slight hints about Brendan in past chapters ;) It might not have even been a surprise lol, and that's okay. I've gone over this chapter repeatedly as well, making the odd change here and there to make it all fit and work, and I finally feel good about it.
Also, in case you're wondering, I picture Brendan as Tom Holland (the buffed out version from Uncharted lol). I know he's a few years older than Brendan in real life, but I can't get it out of my head. Just so you know :)
