Chapter 17: Adrien
Ladybug's POV:
Marinette paced the apartment trying to come up with anything that made sense. Her brain went foggy and she rubbed her eyes. She looked at the clock above the oven and realized how much time had gone by. It was 3:30, and she needed to eat something.
"Does this boy ever eat?" Her mouth hung open at the sight of his semi-empty cabinets. The lower one only had Plagg's cheese in it and in the top one, he had a bag of rice cakes.
Tikki frowned, swishing in and out of the rest of the cabinets to help her holder. "Found some almond butter!" she lifted a large jar with her tiny hands and it weighed her down to the floor with a yelp.
"Tikki!" Marinette giggled, lifting the jar off her kwami's hands. "Jeez, almond butter and rice cakes? He eats like a skinny Instagram influencer" she looked at her options and found herself a butter knife. "I have got to change that" she clicked her tongue.
"One of these days, you'll have to bring a stash of food from home" Tikki glimmered into sight and landed on her shoulder. Marinette spun around to try and meet her eyes but shrugged when she felt her presence on her.
She began spreading almond butter onto a rice cake and licked her lips and made her way to the couch. She scarfed down a few of her creations and patted her stomach, still not quite satiated. Suddenly, her heart lurched in her chest. Tikki, had just finished a spotted macaroon when she closed her eyes and yipped. Marinette startled at the sound.
"Hey Mari, I just got a little pang in my head, did you feel it too?" The red creature asked.
"I did. Do you think it's Chat? Do you think he's in danger?" she stood up ready to transform. "Spots on" she called. She flipped open her yo-yo to a message from her boyfriend.
"My love. I am on a secret mission right now, top secret. I promise to keep you in the loop afterwards. There is…. A lot to unpack. I love you. Don't ever forget that. And don't go to the Eiffel tower today. Felix is going to create an illusion. -CN"
Why did he sound like he was saying goodbye? Her heart thumped. Secret mission? Illusion? Felix must be working with Lila. Alright, this has got to stop. None of this hiding was working for her anymore. Chat was going to face danger without her again and she was having none of it. She opened the window and lowered herself down the side of the building. Thunder began rolling in and she felt another pang in her stomach. I'm coming kitty.
She flew around the city in search of him. He had mentioned Felix being at the Eiffel tower and she figured he might've gone there. Though, he did say Felix was up to no good, and that she should refrain from seeking him out there. But, at the same time, she knew her protective kitty and she knew he didn't always want her to fight her own battles. And if he was fighting Felix for her and got hurt, she would never forgive herself. Stubbornness carried her body towards the tower. If he were mad, then so be it.
She landed delicately so as to not be noticeable.
"Help. Chat! Please help!" she heard a desperate voice crying from the top. She sickened at the sound as it sounded exactly like her.
If this was his illusion and Chat didn't know about it, it certainly wouldn't work. She never spoke in that way. She had been vulnerable with him, but she certainly wouldn't whine. She swung up the tower and hid behind a pillar.
Peeking her head ever so slightly around the corner, she saw him. He stood behind a tied up illusion or senti version of herself with his arms crossed. He looked weaker than she had remembered. A new boost of confidence hit her like a tidal wave. He was worried. His plan was failing. Ha. Just as she was about to make her move, he caught her eye. Time froze. An uneasy hint of power shone in his gaze. It was powerful, it was sinister, and it was all too familiar. She swallowed hard and hid behind the pillar again. Lightning struck the tower and she jumped at the sound.
"Not so fast, little girl" his voice trailed behind her like an icy river. Her veins froze at his voice, as if the blood stopped pumping through her. She felt his hand reach around the pillar and take hold of her throat. Move, you idiot, move. She kicked her foot backwards and heard him chuckle. Free from his hold, she sprung away from him and met his eyes again. He was now transformed into Flarmidable. The orange outline of his familiar frame made her sick. Images of him sincerely helping her fight strike back flooded her memory and the air left her lungs. Traitor.
"Should I touch your yo-yo again? Or should I see if this ball can fetch a whole girl? That would be fun. How would you like to know what it feels like to be captured into a miraculous?" He questioned lurching towards her.
She yearned for Chat Noir to come crashing through, scooping her into his arms. Her body felt lifeless, frozen, a corpse glued to the ground in front of her enemy. She had seen her own remains in the Chat Blanc timeline, and she was beginning to feel that way. Like a grey, statue of herself, one touch away from disintegrating. Kitty. Please come. She felt a jolt in her chest that told her he was calling her. The tug she felt from Chat was enough to set life back into her heart. She sprung backwards and made a run for it, blood finally flowing into her system.
Ladybug pounded on the ground, not looking back. Rain whipped at her and blinded her vision but she didn't care. He knew. He knew who she was. Little girl. He called her that twice now. And once had been to Marinette. She stopped on the bakery but realized he could find her there. Her fingers dug into the palms of her hands. She wasn't even paying attention to where she was headed, she just knew she needed to run, fast. She heard nothing behind her, and saw nothing around her but still, she felt watched, chased. She climbed up the slippery side of the building she called home.
Ladybug was soaked but she still felt hot sweat trickling down her back. She had panicked again. He's just Felix. He isn't any different from the other people she had fought daily. She needed to conquer her fear of him, and she knew what started it. It was the fact that he looked so like someone she trusted and loved for so long. The fact that he was smarter than other villains, and the fact that he won over her in the past. No one had ever won before. No one had ever led her to failure.. until he did…. She entered the room.
Landing on the carpet she took a relieved breath. It felt good to be inside. The feeling of anxiety lessened in her stomach. That must mean he's home. She smiled. She tapped her feet lightly, knocking some mud onto the spot near the window. She lifted her eyes from her feet and was met with something that shocked her. She blinked to make sure she wasn't imagining things.
"A-Adrien?" She gasped at the blonde boy who stood in the middle of her and Chat's living room, staring blankly, mouth open, at the window. His hair was lying in all directions wildly, and his cheeks were soaked with tears. She felt butterflies fill her. He opened his mouth.
"Please don't freak out." He spoke gently walking towards her.
Suddenly, reality kicked in and she came to her senses. "FELIX! You followed me home!" she swung her yo-yo out towards him and wrapped him in a tight capture, knocking him to the ground with a thud.
"Not..Felix" he grumbled, his face pressed into the carpet.
She stepped towards him angrily, kicking him so that he lay facing up towards her. "Oh yeah? Then if you're not Felix, why in the world is Adrien Agreste in Chat Noir's apartment, waiting for me, just after Felix went chasing after me throughout the whole city!?" She cried. "And what the hell did you do to Chat Noir?!" her face grew piercing with anger and desperation for her boyfriend. She placed a foot on his chest and darted her eyes around the room.
"I can explain Ladybug. He's safe. I promise he's safe. Wait is he still out there, Felix? Did he hurt you?" he frowned, scanning her for any harm. She stared at him for a moment and shook her head. Adrien choked. "I really am me. I'm just Adrien. You can trust me." he peered up at her and gave her a half smile. His eyes were sincere and warm. They looked sad and shiny and they held her in a way that only Chat was able to do. She blinked and stared into his gaze as he moved her with sadness. She realized she hadn't seen him in a long time and had been growing sick with worry, over finding out who his father was.
"Oh, Adrien" she sighed, untying him from her yo-yo hold. He placed his hands into the carpet and stood himself up. She walked towards him with a testing look on her face. Her eyebrows furrowed and her lips pouting slightly. He found it adorable and wanted to kiss her immediately. God he missed her. Though, it hadn't even been a full day.
She saw a glint of happiness in his eyes as he backed into the door. She squinted, scanning him with suspicion.
"Why are you here?" she crossed her arms.
"Long story" he raised his hands up in defense, wondering where to start.
"Well, start now." She tapped her foot. He lowered his head and chuckled. His hair, a mess, hung over his face and cast a shadow over his eyes. He crossed his arms like hers and chuckled again.
Her heart flipped. The walls began to close around her. That laugh. She looked at him again, her eyes widening with astonishment. She uncrossed her arms, unable to feel them as they flopped to her sides like noodles. No way. He noticed this and she saw his eyes change again, this time to a deep apologetic look that only meant that he knew what she saw. He was communicating with her through his eyes in a way only one other person could. And he was telling her that he felt guilty. He looked guilty in such a Chat-like way that she couldn't believe she didn't see it before. Her mouth opened but nothing came out.
"I'm sorry my lady…" he began
"Don't." she held her hand up
"Ladybug" he protested
"Oh" her hand began covering her mouth.
"My lady" he interrupted
"my" she continued
"My love" his eyebrows lowered, softening his look
"God." She covered her mouth.
"Please don't be mad" he pleaded walking towards her.
"Oh my god" she shook her head backing away.
"Please don't back away from me. Please. I really need you right now" he whispered, his eyes looking down. She looked at him and felt the last barrier between them vanish. The walls around him crumbled and allowed her to finally see him, her soulmate, in his entirety. And in this moment, he looked broken.
She stopped moving. Her face grew hot against her hands. He stepped towards her and placed a tender hand on her shoulder. His touch radiated throughout her body. "Oh my god. It's you. It's really you" she breathed.
"It's me" he squeezed slightly.
"Adrien" his name escaped her lips. It floated in the air between them, breaking the tension.
"Hi" his lip quivered.
"What about Madrid? How have you been with me all this time? I texted you and you said you were on your trip?" she shook her head again, confused by the several questions she had bouncing around her mind. He looked at the ground and exhaled. Then he met her eyes again.
"That wasn't me in Spain. But it also wasn't Felix" he swallowed thinking about everything that had happened, everything he had to keep from her. He had no idea where to begin "I had to lie so that my identity..." he moved his hand down her arms and held hers. His hand was shaking.
"Then who was..." she searched his face. His damp eyes, his quivering mouth and the streaks of leftover tears painted a picture that was all too clear. A lot had happened.
"There's a lot to unpack, bug." he bit his lip.
That's when it hit her, like a brick building had been smashed over her head. Chat was Adrien. Gabriel Agreste was Hawkmoth. Her kitty was dealing with this knowledge the whole time and she had no idea. No wonder he seemed so different. No wonder he spent so much time researching alone. No wonder he fainted the other day. He was carrying more than she could've ever imagined. Her heart ached for him. She softened entirely and pulled his shaking hand towards her, crashing them into an embrace. She felt his body collapse into her. His body was hot with fever. She pulled away and looked up at him.
"Oh Adrien, your father! Oh kitty!" she kissed his head and cradled it, whispering sweet words of comfort. He fell into her and held on for dear life. She felt him shake in her arms, letting his emotions release into her. It tortured her to feel him this sad, to know he had been holding it together so well for her. "My poor kitty, you've known this whole time… that he was your father…and FELIX! Oh god I'm so sorry…I'm so sorry you had to keep it in…. stupid, stupid secret identities…" she stroked his back with her hand soothing him as he cried.
"I went to see him today….my father" he hiccupped. He babbled some nonsense and she made out a few sentences. "He smacked me… I knocked him out. I have been trying to get to the bottom of all of this alone so that I didn't give away my identity to you. It's been so hard. I'm so sorry I kept it from you" he gasped between each word as he broke into sobs.
"You what!?" she gasped angrily but noticed that he was still crying and decided to talk about it later. "shh… its ok chaton I'm here. We'll figure out the rest together."
"Together? You still love me? Even though I was such an idiot in high school? Even though everything about me is…screwed up now?" he pulled away from her and gave her a sad look of guilt. She cupped his cheeks with her hands.
"You weren't an idiot. I never told you that I loved you until I fell in love with Chat Noir. And now that I know that you're, you. I…. I love you even more." She kissed him on the cheek and leaned away. "Oh, Adrien I felt guilty for loving Chat Noir so intensely and yet still having feelings for you." She smacked herself on the forehead and blushed. "Of course you're Adrien. No one else could be you" she laughed nervously "I've only ever known two incredible boys to be this gentle, kind, and protective. And they both so happen to be the same boy. Goodness I am such a fool. A lucky fool. And I love you. So. Much." she cupped his face again with her hands and pulled him into a kiss. His hands found a place on her waist and he leaned into it. She pulled away and brushed his bangs out of his eyes, planting loving kisses on his forehead. He giggled through sniffles. "Oh god you have a fever." his head was hot and sweaty against her kiss. "The only downside to this is that now I feel even more protective over you… now that I know your father is Hawkmoth." She lowered her voice tenderly on the subject.
"Was…" Adrien spoke hollowly.
"Was?" she drew away from him, an eyebrow raised. "You didn't… like kill him did you?" her mind flashed to Chat Blanc's angry blue eyes.
"No, my lady. Although the way he talked about you, I really could have. But no. I meant he's no longer Hawkmoth" he released from her embrace held out his hand. On his palm, purple and shiny, was the butterfly miraculous.
"How?!" she reached out to touch it but hesitated as though it would burn her.
"I grabbed it from his shirt today. I faced him. I really faced him, and it was terrifying. I was desperately thinking of a way to stop him, to weaken him. I wasn't even acting in my own body, it felt… unreal." He spoke as though he were remembering a nightmare. The bags under his eyes created craters in his usually flawless face. She felt the mess of emotions he was experiencing and decided he needed rest.
"Let's talk about this after some rest, okay?" she placed a hand on his shoulder and gave him a loving smile. He nodded, his eyes burning from the day he'd had. He finally felt at ease under her gaze. Her crystal eyes shown like two pools of water, like an oasis in his desert of sadness. He couldn't believe it had only been a few hours since he saw her. It felt like weeks. Her soft hand guided him into the bedroom and he followed her effortlessly. Sleep. He let his eyes fall heavy as he flopped onto the bed. He felt blankets begin to surround him and then something even better, her arms around him. She lay behind him, spooning him as best as she could given her small size. He moved his hand from underneath him, to hold the hand that lay draped around his waist.
"mmmm" he hummed. "Sleep here tonight my lady." He continued softly. It wasn't a request or a question. He didn't mean it to come out as a command but in a way it was. He needed her. She tucked herself into his shoulder and called her transformation off.
"Ask and you shall receive. Hey, look who's a baby now" she giggled.
"maybe" he mumbled. "But you're still my baby" his mouth curled into a sleepy smirk.
"Touché" she whispered, kissing his ear. Warmth radiated from the spot she had kissed.
