Notes: This is part 2 of Family Business, but can be read as a solo work. Everything that happened there and who Phoebe and Tara are will eventually be explained in here anyway.
Chapter 1
Dante had convinced him to drink until he was passed out on the couch, and after twenty years Vergil didn't remember how bad a hangover could be. He slowly opened his eyes as even the few sunrays that managed to get through the office's windows felt like they could melt his eyes. He didn't enjoy drinking like that, anything that could affect someone's senses is pure foolishness, however, the last thing he remembered was his brother telling him it was part of the new year's ritual and that Nero would be glad if he went along with it. And now the oldest son of Sparda was bothered by the fact that he let the idea of someone being happy over him doing something affect his judgement.
He had never been like that. He would never do something that wasn't for his own agenda. Vergil was the man who unsealed Temen-ni-gru so he could get his father's power, for goodness' sake! But there he was, flopped on the couch as he grunted at himself because now he had feelings. He narrowed his blue eyes as he stared at the fan on the ceiling, the one that always moved so slowly it created no air current at all. Why his brother still kept that thing was a mystery. Oh, the regret he felt for splitting himself into human and demon. His weak side, V, had almost crumbled and disappeared from existence, however, somehow that made him stronger. And that was bad. Really bad.
"Hey, Vergil." Hearing Dante's voice right next to him caused two effects: first, it felt like his head was about to explode, it didn't make any sense for him to talk so loudly. Second, if he was already up, what time was it?
"Why are you yelling?" He grunted.
"I'm not, you're just hungover." His twin's smirk was enough to give him murderous intentions. "The symptoms get worse after a certain age." There he was again, trying to call him old when they were twins.
"Only speak the bare minimum to me." It was all Vergil could mutter without feeling like his head was about to explode and make a huge mess in the office.
"You want some coffee?" Dante's smile became wider and wider the more he teased his twin. "I could go out and get you some. See? I'm a very good brother."
The older brother rolled his eyes and felt like he was having a stroke from the sharp pain that came over them. "As long as it isn't from Starbucks." He placed his palm on his forehead and if his twin's smile widened even more. If he kept going like this, he would soon turn into the Joker.
"What the fuck is wrong with Starbucks?"
"They don't sell coffee, they sell muddy water."
Oh, Vergil, always complaining about everything. Not that the younger twin understood anything about coffee, he wasn't a big fan of the beverage, he would only drink it out of necessity after a hangover. He placed his hands on his hips and stared at his brother.
"And where does the princess want me to get coffee from?"
"There's a coffee shop on-"
"Nope." Dante interrupted. "Too far." He walked to his chair and sat on it and propped his feet up his desk.
"I could get you some coffee, sweetie." A raven-haired woman showed up on the couch's arm, her long legs crossed and of her thighs exposed thanks to the slit on her long black dress. Vergil narrowed his blue eyes as soon as her violet ones rested on his. He still hadn't figured out whether that woman was incredibly desperate to sleep with him or just wanted to annoy him.
Dante, on the other hand, knew the answer: Tara was desperate to sleep with his twin. First, he had been her first victim, even though she knew he was in some sort of relationship with her own daughter. Then, she moved to Nero, who also had a girlfriend, and now Vergil. The only explanation was that her goal was to sleep at least with one descendant of Sparda before dying.
Now, the older twin felt like a truck had run over him, and there was a perverted woman bothering him, all because he went along with his brother.
"Why did I listen to you, Dante?" Vergil decided to bluntly ignore the sorceress. Those were the moments he wanted more than anything to have his own place, however, his brother had told him the truth: economy really was hard at the moment.
"Because you care about your son's feelings."
"I don't." He muttered. Although, with each passing day, the half demon started to accept more and more that every time he said that it was a lie. His new found feelings would spiral out of control eventually and he had no idea what to do.
To be fair, the one that figured out his weak spot had been Phoebe. Not that it was surprising, she had been trained to find weak spots. Her idea of using Nero to manipulate Vergil into doing some things had entirely turned the tables in the brother's relationship. At first, the older twin would stubbornly stay locked in his room, reading, except for the moments he would challenge Dante to a fight. Now it had become a little easier to get him to do different stuff.
Not too far from the office, Lady had already woken up and had gone to her kitchen to make herself some coffee. As soon as her eyes caught the glimpse of someone sitting at her table, her first reaction was to grab a knife a point it at her possible aggressor. Until she realized the possible aggressor had copper hair and emerald eyes that she knew very well.
"What the fuck, Phoebe!" She yelled; her heterochromatic eyes widened. The redhead, on the other hand, didn't seem impressed.
"Oh, hey, you also sleep naked."
The devil huntress didn't try to cover her nakedness, they had been friends for years and had already seen each other try outfits for countless times. "Why are you in my place at this hour in the morning?"
"It's actually 4pm, Lady." She smirked when she saw the other woman's shock.
"You came to check if I was still alive? That's very considerate of you." Lady was legitimately touched. She walked to the cupboard and grabbed a mug.
"Actually, I came to tell you I know that you and Vergil are fucking each other."
The mug hit the ground and shattered in many pieces. Her heterochromatic eyes were widened in shock, her mouth agape. Phoebe, on the other hand, stared back with a smug smile on her lips, one elbow leaning against the table and her chin in her hand.
"How?!"
"Lady, last night you were doing the whole 'hey, look at how hot I am, look at my cleavage' act with Vergil." She made a mock imitation with her, causing Lady to raise an eyebrow.
"I don't talk like that." She narrowed her eyes.
"After two bottles of champagne you do." The redhead muttered. "When did that start?! You didn't tell me anything!"
"Nothing started! It was a one time thing!" She was about to take a step when she remembered about the poor shattered mug. "Can you help with that?" The brunette pointed at it as she looked at the other woman. Phoebe waved her hand and all pieces, no matter how tiny, were gone. "Thanks."
"You didn't answer my question."
"It was right after Christmas' Eve." She watched as the sorceress blinked twice, as if trying to absorb the information.
"Oh, when you practically demanded that he walked you home? Holy shit, you had the whole thing planned!" The redhead had a lot of mixed feelings about this, she was happy about her friend being so smart, but she was also worried about where this could lead. Phoebe also felt a little disgusted because, well, Vergil had some sexist opinions. "Okay, I'm bringing Trish in on this."
Lady opened her mouth to protest, but the redhead had already teleported away. She shrugged and grabbed another mug to finally get herself some coffee until the girls showed up. Her mug was halfway full when Phoebe and Trish magically appeared in her kitchen, the blonde rushing to the sink as she felt temporarily sick. Thankfully, she managed to not throw up.
"Hm, I sleep naked as well." Instead of her usual outfit, the demoness wore jeans and a black long-sleeved blouse.
"Okay, will the two of you at least let me get dressed before you start bashing me?" The brunette asked as she took a sip of her beverage.
"Or... We can all take our clothes off." The sorceress said carefreely as she shrugged, only to be answered by her friends' weird look on her faces. "Or maybe not." She whispered to herself as she looked down, embarrassed.
"Be right back."
After a moment, Lady went back to the kitchen, wearing white shorts and a white tank top. Both her friends were sitting at the table, and she joined them.
"So, the situation is..." Phoebe started, but got interrupted by the brunette.
"She knows."
The sorceress exchanged looks between them in shock. "What?!"
"Lady didn't tell you because you tell Dante everything." The blonde said nonchalantly.
"What?!"
"C'mon, you're gonna tell me you don't?" The human had made a rhetorical question.
It was true. She did. However, people needed to understand that gossip was the foundation of their relationship. Phoebe would often watch what hers or his neighbors were doing, only to rush to the office and tell him everything as they both had a good laugh about it. There was also another tiny detail that would make her say things she wasn't supposed to tell him.
"It's those puppy eyes!"
"What puppy eyes?" Lady had her arms crossed over her chest as she kept staring at the redhead.
"No, she's right. He does that, I just never fell for it." Trish was absently-minded drawing circles on the table with her index finger.
"I've never seen that." The brunette grunted, still not believing in it.
"That's because you either didn't realize because it didn't affect you, or because he knows that, if he tries, you'll shoot him in the face." Phoebe said, unamused, as both her palms held her chin while her elbows leaned against the table.
"Anyway, my point is, you can't tell Dante about it!" Lady leaned in, getting her face closer to the sorceress'. "If he finds out, I'll never hear the end of it. After I die, he'll go the cemetery to find my tombstone just so he can keep mocking me and bothering my spirit!"
"That sounds like something he would do." The redhead chuckled as she imagined how it would be. "I thought you were afraid he would be patronizing."
"No, that's actually your thing." They both stared at each other with squinted eyes.
"I worry about you!" Phoebe grunted, offended by the accusation.
"Relax, it's just sex." Trish stretched her arms to push both girls back to their seats at the same times.
"Oh, really? Let me tell you the tale of how Dante and I started."
"That's different and you know it!" Lady pointed an accusatory index finger at the redhead's face.
"How?!"
"You can't do the friends with benefits routine with you already care deeply for your friend!"
The sorceress took a deep breath to speak louder: "My point is: I don't want him to hurt you." The brunette breathed to answer properly but got interrupted before she could even start. "And if he does, I'm kicking his ass."
"I agree with Phoebe on this." Trish said.
"No one is getting hurt! I mean, outside of bed." Lady flushed when she realized that both women had tilted her heads and were looking at her weirdly. "I may enjoy some things I may or may not be proud of." She said slowly.
"Oh, my God, I knew he was a dom." Phoebe muttered.
All of Lady's silent prayers had been heard as her phone started to ring. She quickly rose to her feet to answer, hoping it would be a call to save her from this situation. Thankfully, it was Dante looking for Phoebe so she could help him resolve a situation in the office.
"Uhm... Phoebe, it was Dante." The brunette went back to the kitchen, scratching the back of her neck. "Your mother is at Devil May Cry bothering Vergil."
The redhead gently banged her forehead against the table. "Cazzo." She muttered. "This conversation isn't over!" She said before teleporting herself back to the office.
"She forgot to take me back to my place." Trish sighed as Lady chuckled.
As Phoebe got there, she saw Vergil sitting on the couch, his hand holding Tara's wrist in place and far away from his face as she was probably trying to touch him in a hopeless attempt to seduce the hybrid. Although he was probably extremely annoyed at the situation, his touch seemed firm but also gentle. Phoebe had already figured he wasn't the type of man who would hurt a woman. At least not outside of bed. The raven-haired woman was still sitting on the couch's arm, her dress showing too much of her cleavage, as her violet eyes seemed to be swallowing him alive.
"Tara, what the hell?" Phoebe sighed. She was tired of dealing with her mother's obsession all the time.
"What? Can't a woman have some fun?" She smirked. A smirk that always sent shivers down her spine.
"There's a difference between fun and sexual harassment." Dante muttered. Usually, he would find the situation funny, however, Tara had a way to get into his bad side. He didn't appreciate her presence at all, but still wouldn't kick her out in consideration of the redhead's feelings.
"I can deal with this on my own." Vergil said coldly.
"See, sweetie? He can deal with this on his own." The older sorceress said as she placed a loose lock of hair that fell from her messy bun behind her ear. "Unless you're jealous, but I have moved on from your devil some time ago." She completed provocatively.
"Okay, that's it." Phoebe clapped her hands once and pointed at the door. "Out."
"This isn't your place, dear."
"I said: get out!" The redhead yelled and grabbed her mother by her arm and pulled her towards the door.
"Are you kicking your mother out?" Dante rolled his eyes as he heard her say that. Tara would always try to manipulate the younger sorceress's feelings. This situation was always a fifty-fifty: it could either work, or piss her off even further.
"Madre che mi ha scaricato e mi ha fatto vendere alla mafia!" It had been the second option.
"You know I don't speak-"
Tara was interrupted by Phoebe aggressively shoving her out and closing the door on her face. However, before the door had been closed completely, the raven-haired sorceress managed to throw a spell that hit the redhead's arm.
"Porca puttana!" She cursed between gritted teeth; her arm felt like it was burning.
"What did she do?" Dante had gotten up and was approaching her, wanting to calm her down.
"I don't know but it fucking hurts." The redhead hissed as the half demon gently grabbed her arm to inspect it.
"I told you I could handle it." Vergil said, unamused. Actually, his voice didn't, in any way, reflect his mind. This whole mother and child fight was bringing him bad memories.
"Va bene, Vergil. L'ho capito la prima." Phoebe growled at him and the hybrid could've sworn he was dealing with some kind of feral animal. However, he only raised an eyebrow and stared at his twin, waiting for a translation.
The younger twin sighed. "She said she got it the first time you said it."
"Well, I'll be in my room." The older son of Sparda announced as he rose to his feet. Not that he was expecting any kind of answer, Dante was pretty busy at the moment comforting his girlfriend.
He felt like he was one sneeze way from his head fully exploding and he was tired from having to hide the level of pain. Vergil flopped on his bed and closed his eyes. At least his brother had become good at comforting people after having a fight with their parent, back when they were kids he would just point at his face and laugh. And now the older twin opened his eyes again as he wondered where had that thought come from.
If things kept going like that, he would have to think of something to kill all those feelings inside of him, the situation was starting to become unbearable. But how? Vergil knew for a fact that drinking didn't help with anything but making a fool out of yourself. Maybe his answer would be in psychology, however, he didn't know anyone that knew too much about it. Or did he?
"THAT BITCH BLOCKED MY POWERS!" The half demon heard Phoebe roar from downstairs, and that was when he remembered she had "diagnosed" him with mother issues. Maybe he should ask for her help. Tomorrow, when his headache wouldn't be trying to kill him. Damn you, Dante.
"For how long do you think that will last?" The younger son of Sparda scratched the back of his head.
"I have no idea."
"Well, good thing we don't have any jobs for now, huh?" He said as an attempt to cheer her up. "Seriously, though, babe, I don't know why you still haven't told her to fuck off once and for all."
Phoebe sighed as she walked towards the couch, flopping herself onto it. "She's my mother..."
"The problem is that she doesn't act like it." He patted one of her knees, signaling for her to raise her legs so he could also sit on the couch. Once he sat down, he grabbed her legs to place them on his lap. "Take Vergil for example, he preferred to throw himself into the underworld instead of staying with his son? Yes. But at least he's trying now. Tara has only ever used you as means to an end, and that end is fucking someone from my family, myself included."
The redhead didn't answer, she just kept staring at some random spot on the wall as she fidget with her own hair.
"I know that I'm one hell of a good catch and Vergil and Nero are lucky to be almost as hot as me..." He smirked when he heard her chuckle. "But this needs to stop."
Once again, she didn't answer. Phoebe knew her reasons to keep her mother around, even if she were the most despicable one in the entire world. She just didn't want to talk about it. They stayed in silence for a while, Dante massaging her legs during that, until the doors of the office flew open. The half demon sighed when he saw the blonde teenager with her blue eyes sparkling, even though he didn't understand the camera she had in her hands.
"I had the most genius idea in the entire world, Dante!" Patty squeaked.
"You're going to knock before coming into my place?" He said sarcastically, but the girl was so excited she completed ignored that.
"No! I'm going to make a reality show about you and your family!" She jumped in her spot a few times, not even Christmas got her so excited back when she was a little kid. The half demon's face fell and he stared at his partner, who just shrugged back at him.
"Goddamn it." He muttered. "This is the worst idea in the history of bad ideas."
