Walks in four years late with Starbucks and an outline.
Makino climbed up the mountain about once a week. She'd bring any excess clothes and necessities she'd collected from the harbor but it was mostly to sit the boys down and try and instruct them through some form of education. She'd never been a teacher, of course, and had not had much formal schooling herself, but she thought it important to teach them the fundamentals. Simple math, reading, even a little science when their attention span would allow it. And, she didn't think she was being egotistical in saying that she's the only one that could fill this role.
At least, maybe before Robin joined them.
She'd gotten into the habit of finding sailing accounts because that's what the boys found interesting but she'd always found history a little daunting, personally. Each book a small piece in a puzzle that was so incredibly vast it was honestly sometimes too intimidating to think about.
It was one of the things she admired about Robin, actually.
"So then Gonzola was deposed and his cousin was named king! But Gonzola's son was clearly next in line! Even then, it would have been his brother to take the throne but nothing was stated about their fates! Did they give the rule to the cousin without a fight? There are no records of war or any insurrection!"
"So what did happen?" Luffy asked with wide eyes. Whether it was from genuine interest or because of this new frantic energy in his older sister was anyone's guess.
Robin's arms whipped around to illustrate her irritation and energy. "We don't know! The records of that people were passed verbally, and by the time they were written down the government had 'allied' itself with the kingdom. I can only imagine." The air quotes were laden with scorn.
"What do you think happened?" Ace asked.
Robin seemed to catch herself and took a breath to calm herself. "Well. I don't have any concrete evidence or accounts… but…" And here she leaned a bit closer with a smile like a secret and her energy picked up with a hushed tone. "There was a stage play written about a hundred years after that, from an island a few weeks sail to the east, that told the story of a secret war of succession in a 'fictional kingdom'" With the air quotes. "It was filled with all kinds of unreliable drama but the climax had the new king claiming to the people that the rightful line of succession was matriarchal and so his was the rightful family line. This closely followed a dramatic murder mystery subplot where the original successors died under mysterious circumstances." She gave the boys a significant look that Ace returned with an intrigued squint.
"Mysterious?" Luffy whispered.
"They were probably assassinated." Ace interpreted.
"Oh."
"That's very impressive that you made that link, I don't know how I would begin connecting those dots." Makino enthused, even as the volume of information had intimidated her a bit in its scope.
Robin faltered a bit. "Oh… Well… I read widely. And a lot of those crates Garp sends are from the same area so… sometimes things just, connect. And if you pay attention long enough you can start to see the pattern." She finished, coloring slightly.
Makino smiled. "That's very wise. It never would have occurred to me to even use historical fiction as a guide for real events."
Robin shrugged. "It may not be. Really, unless you get a first hand account, you can never know the full truth of historical events. Even without meaning to, people put their own bias into recollections that will distort the narrative, and that's before intentional alterations come in. Propaganda and whatnot." She sighed wistfully. "There's almost no way of knowing what really has happened once a generation or two passes… but that's what makes learning so interesting. I take everything with a grain of salt but seeing the overlapping consistencies shape the true events is just so…"
And again, here Robin trailed off just as she was reaching an excited pace once more.
Despite Makino's urging, Robin elected to move on to another book, this one much drier that soon saw the boys drifting off to more exciting activities.
Makino sighed.
It seemed the young woman had something serious on her mind, she only hoped she had someone to talk to up here.
"Robin, what do you want to do when you grow up?"
Robin looked up from the mushroom guide she was consulting. She was inclined to just tell Luffy to never put one in his mouth but she suspected the blanket ban might not work too well. She was working on simplifying the warning signs and drilling it into him to ask her or Ace before eating one.
So this topic change was a little disorienting.
"What do you mean?"
"You're 20, right?" He continued at her amused nod. "So you would have sailed off three years ago if you wanted to be a pirate. But you were already a pirate even before then and you didn't like it very much, right? So what do you want to do?"
She made a thoughtful sound as they continued to walk, thinking it over. "I guess I'm not really sure anymore…"
"You should join my crew when I sail! I bet you'd like being a pirate if your crew is nice and I'll only pick nice people!"
Robin chuckled. "I'm sure you would." She paused for awhile as Luffy found a new stick and enthused about it. "Maybe I could… I don't think Garp would like that very much though." She smirked.
Luffy scoffed. "He doesn't want Ace an' me being pirates either! But we're still going to do it! We'll just get so strong that he won't be able to catch us."
She smiled at the thought. "Sounds like a plan."
"What would you want to do if there wasn't anyone to tell you you couldn't, then?"
Robin paused.
Sometimes it felt like Luffy could reach the core of any problem without trying at all. It was a trait she could see developing into something great.
At the moment though, it really did threaten to swallow her up.
She breathed a strangled laugh. He tilted his head back at her.
"I… I'm not sure…" Luffy makes an inquisitive sound at her when she trails off. "If I could do anything… I guess I would look for the poneglyphs. Finish the professor's research. Find the True History."
"Is that fun?"
"What?"
"Would that make you the happiest to do that? Then that's what you should do!"
Robin thought about it for awhile, then haltingly voiced her thoughts.
"I'm not sure if I would call it fun… Realistically, there are many people out there who would want to stop me. I had to run for so long to keep away from them before I came here. And I was just… tired."
"But you still like history? You read about it all the time!"
She nodded absently but her mind was elsewhere.
She could see the paths lying in front of her. One where she stayed in obscurity, safe, with the few people she had found who cared for her. She believed these were some of the people Saul had spoke of when he told her she would find people who would stay by her side. She could do this. Stay here, occasionally reading second or third hand accounts of events from leagues away brought in on monthly merchant ships. Maybe she could even publish papers of her own. Under a pseudonym of course… with subjects of no consequence, that would not invite scrutiny…
Or.
Or she could go out there again and try.
Try and find the Ryo Poneglyph. Try and outpace the Government and Navy. And bounty hunters. And pirates.
Garp.
She was stronger now. Not just physically either. She wasn't alone save for the ghosts of all her loved ones anymore.
Was it worth it?
Could she live with herself if she didn't?
Would that be enough to carry her to her destination? Could she see herself being satisfied with her actions even if she failed?
"Robin!" A sharp tug on her hand. She looked over at Luffy's annoyed expression. "How does it feel to learn new things?! Isn't it exciting?"
She nodded slowly. "It is. But-"
"Then that's what you should do!" He exclaimed impatiently.
Robin sighed. "I'd like to, but…"
"If anyone tries to stop you, you just gotta beat them up!"
Robin snorted. "I don't think I could. There are way too many of them."
Luffy frowned in thought. "Then you can just run away from them! All you gotta do is read history and then once you know something you can't unknow it, so you win!" He brightened considerably at his own insight. "And you're super strong! You're stronger than me an' Ace, and even if you're not stronger than Gramps I bet you're faster! So if he comes after you you can just run away!"
Robin could only smile fondly at his enthusiasm. And, despite herself, she couldn't squash the spark that was igniting in her chest.
"You really think I could do that?"
"Yeah! And if you join my crew I'll make sure no one will stop you! I'll get so strong I'll be able to protect all my crew AND their dreams!"
"And you'll find crewmates who will do that same for you?"
Luffy paused. "Well, yeah. But I'm the captain, so it's my job to protect THEM."
She chuckles, not a doubt in her mind. "That does sound nice."
"So you'll join me?"
Her smile widens at him.
"Why not?"
She can't do this.
Ever since making that declaration, Luffy has made it vehemently known what her plans are to anyone that will listen. Which isn't terrible, to be clear, no one they interact with on a daily basis would rat them out. To Garp, specifically. As law-abiding as Makino and Woop Slap are, they know when to keep their peace, and they're really the ones Robin would have been worried about the most. Funnily enough.
But no, ever since that decision, she's had a deep pit in her stomach that, for once, doesn't come from the fear of betrayal.
She thinks about a burning island and all the people in the world she cared about burning on it.
She thinks about those years running in solitude.
She thinks about the fragile little, she hesitates but can't deny, family she's found here, despite all odds.
She thinks about Garp, and the risk he took in bringing her here.
Luffy, and what her future association could mean.
Ace.
Any scrutiny into Ace could bring that fragile house of cards down.
She laughs hysterically to herself.
Any scrutiny into ANY of them would bring that house down.
She can't stop circling around the 'what if's and trying to calculate costs, rewards, probabilities.
She wonders; for the first time in awhile she allows herself to wonder, what they all would think of her.
For so long that hurt too much to think about. Their memory was so far from comforting, it hurt so badly to think about she would go months before stumbling upon a memory and with it, the shame of having forgotten them. What is she, but the last living embodiment to Ohara and all of its best parts? How could she go back to looking as if she hadn't given up on them, knowledge, and herself?
She finds herself voicing these thoughts one evening, long after dinner, she and Dadan having moved out to share a drink as the party got a little too loud inside the house.
"Were they really all that?" The older woman responds after a long silence.
"…excuse me?"
"Were they really so great if they'd be disappointed you didn't, what, finish their studies? There's a shitton of crap to be found out about the world. But this one thing is really the most vital thing that destroying your life is really what will make the difference?"
"It's not- it's about finding out the truth!" She interjects, a little indignantly.
"And how does that help you?" Dadan retorts, half mocking.
Robin gapes at her. "I don't- I have a responsibility to uncover it! I'm the last person that can!"
"What, no ones ever going to be smart enough to decipher it, ever again?"
Robin clicks her mouth shut and seethes a moment too long.
"If you're so torn up about some dead scholars being mad you stopped looking for these impossible-to-find blocks of stone. That the fucking government killed them all for, mind. Well. I'd tell you, 'haven't you already done plenty?' If it was me, I'd be like, 'why the hell are you chasing something that got me killed!? Get as far as you can and do something that makes you happy, for fuck's sake!'"
Robin scoffs loudly, throwing her hands up but unwilling to get up and leave. A few tears have already started to slip out, anyway. "You're impossible."
"Oh?" Dadan crows. "I'm impossible!? That's rich, coming from you!"
"I regret starting this conversation with you."
"Too bad for you. This is what happens when you come bitching to me."
Robin groans and quickly finishes her cup.
Dadan fills it as soon as it's level again.
Robin frowns at her but defiantly takes another gulp, making the other woman snort. They sit like that for awhile, listening to the insects in the night, the shouting inside, and occasionally swatting at flies.
"Say… say they didn't want you to go."
"…what?"
"Say your scholar friends told you to give it up. That it was alright and they'd just be happy you're safe and uh, well, somewhat happy. Would you still want to go?"
"I…" She tried to imagine it but… even if she could envision the scenario, she couldn't really believe it. "I don't know. It's too… difficult to think about. How am I supposed to know…" She shakes her head. "I don't know what to do."
Dadan looks at her from her perch on the house steps, head cocked to the side. She smacks her leg and turns her body to her. "Alright. Let's talk it out then."
"Isn't that what we're-"
"Right, then, I'm your fancy teacher or whatever. I probably have a beard and glasses, here we go." She pulls a bit of her hair over her lip to let it fall forward in the impersonation.
"Are you roleplaying? Professor Clover didn't even have glasses!" Robin laughed.
"Good, I don't think we have any either. Ok! So. Robin." She starts again seriously. Robin is riveted suddenly by Dadan's serious expression but quickly giggles at the absurdity of her puckered lip keeping the beard in place.
"Yes?"
"'Yes, sir, Professor Clover.'" She points out haughtily.
Robin wheezes a bit with laughter before calming enough to repeat the words. "Yes, sir, Professor Clover, sir?"
Dadan strokes her mustache and looks down at her with a contemplative gaze. "Now, now, we're all colleagues of equal standing here, no need to be so formal."
She chokes and wipes the tears from her eyes. "Of course."
"Now Robin. I forgot to tell you before, but we actually found out what the true history is."
Robin's brows shoot up and she presses her lips to suppress the smile. "Oh?" still comes out very wobbly, though. "That's quite a breakthrough. What did you find out?"
Dadan waves her hand, now miming holding a pipe with it. "Oh, you know. The government is trash and Navy HQ is built on a dungheap where all the World Nobles spawn from. Very obvious stuff once you actually think about it, you know."
"Of course." She wheezed.
"Right, so, there's no need for you to go out and look for those giant's play-blocks anymore." She leans forward. "What do you want to do now?"
Robin smiles sadly. "I don't know."
"Well, you could always just wait around on this island until that brat brother of yours is old enough to sail."
"He's not a brat."
"You could join the marines." She continued with a teasing smile.
Robin choked. "As if." She laughed.
"You could join that charismatic bandit leader's gang for real and help Curly Dadan rule Mount Corbo with an iron fist."
Robin snorted.
"You could… go out there and find out what happened for yourself, because you're too curious for your own good." Dadan said sadly.
Robin stared at her.
"Even if we had never died… even if we had just presented the answer to you, would you have accepted it? I don't think so. We've watched you every day and you question everything. If a motive and line of events isn't clearly visible you go looking and tirelessly puzzle out the truth. I know you've been rewriting some of those books Garp's brought."
Somewhere inside, glass broke, and raucous laughter followed it almost immediately.
"I think you've build something good for yourself here and you're afraid of losing it all again. Which is fair." She shrugged. "But no matter what happens it won't erase that you have built it. Death doesn't erase the time you had with us. A quiet life won't guarantee peace or happiness. And it won't replace your purpose, the burning questions you need answered. Not for us; for you." She punctuated it with a jab to Robin's chest.
"So, I'll ask you again. What do you want to do?"
"This is it, then? After all that yammering it was Dadan that shoved you out the door?" Ace groused from her door.
Robin laughed. "I suppose. But if she asks, it was technically Professor Clover." She wasn't going to take much; a single bag and whatever she could hide on her person. Stealth and speed would be key, and she was out of practice.
"Are you still going to join Luffy? What about all your…" He waved a hand, "research and stuff?"
"I'll do what I can alone until he becomes a pirate, then I'll meet up with him somewhere." She grinned at him. "I'm sure it won't take long after his debut to get word circulating. I'll find him."
Ace snickered. Their little brother was awfully loud. In word and action.
"But I'll see you first."
His eyes snapped up to hers and his cheeks colored. He scoffed. "Yeah, of course! You'll hear about me before that, though!"
Robin chuckled at the attitude. She patted the bed beside her.
He looked at her quizzically but obediently trudged in to sit by her side.
"I want to give you some advice that you may not like. You don't have to follow it. I just want you to think about it, ok?"
Ace squinted at her suspiciously but nodded. "What is it?"
"First, I'd like it if you stopped asking people that question."
Ace tensed.
Robin watched him until he slowly resettled but didn't relax.
"I understand why you do it, but it really brings too much attention to yourself. If you want to get into a fight, just throw the first punch, you don't need to work yourself up like that. It's not good for you and it worries me and Luffy. Dadan and the gang, too, if I'm honest."
Ace looked away.
"Ace… the opinions of people who don't know you don't matter. That's not just my opinion, either."
"Everyone says-"
"I actually know that 'everyone' does not 'say' because I know quite a few people on this island and not that are actually very glad you're alive and well. And want it to stay that way."
Ace stubbornly kept staring at the wood grain of the flood.
"…my second piece of advice actually has to do with that too, though. I think you should find people who knew your father and ask them what they thought of him."
Ace whipped around to stare at her. "What?! Where would I even- If he was captured, how could his crew or anyone still be out there?! You remember what the Navy did to all those women!"
Robin nodded seriously, "Even so, it's possible not all of them were caught or someone quietly kept their head down. That would make it harder to find anything, too. And even if you did, they might not want to talk. You don't even have to ask, this is just a suggestion."
"Why?"
"You did not know him. I think it would give you closure to learn about what kind of man he truly was, from a first person account, rather than from the propaganda-fueled vitriol of a bar patron that's half blackout drunk."
Ace pouted and rolled his eyes, turning away. Robin caught his chin with a finger to bring him back.
"You might find him to be a man worth hating. That was unworthy of your mother. But better an imperfect man than a notorious monster."
"… I guess."
She tapped him on the nose with a finger. "As long as you think about it."
"Yeah, yeah." He picked at a loose thread on the hem of his shirt, visibly searching for a topic change. "Where do you think you'll go first?"
"No place specific; someplace with a large city and a Navy base with good records. I might be able to find a seed of something to start a trail." She mused.
Ace frowned. "You think you can pull that off without getting caught?"
"Of course. The hard part will be getting ahold of patrol schedules for the week or so. I'll frequent a few bars in disguise for awhile to get an idea of what the base community is like… it shouldn't be a problem."
"…don't tell anyone I told you, but you're so fucking cool."
She beamed. "Why thank you. That's provided I find anything of consequence, though. It might all be for nothing."
"Still."
She nodded. "Which is why I should start as soon as I can." Robin smiled fondly. "I don't think I'd be back on this path if it wasn't for you two, you know."
Ace's cheeks reddened slightly. "Don't go regretting it, then."
"I won't. Not when I have such cute little brothers to teach still."
Ace's face scrunched up. "Ugh. Just make sure it's fun." He replied like he didn't end up riveted by whatever story Robin ended up telling them.
"Absolutely." She smiled adoringly. "Nothing but the best."
Robin left Dawn island for the first time in four years a few hours before the sun rose on a slow and sleepy spring morning. She slipped between shadows and freight and, by the time the small merchant ship arrived at it's next harbor, the other passengers were none the wiser of their additional shipmate. Once again she donned the identity of nobody to be remembered, but this time…
It was her choice.
Maaaan, I've been working on this thing on and off for about a year? Two? So glad I have it done.
I'm pretty excited about the next one tbh but I have no idea when it'll be done. It'll probably be the last in this series though. We'll see, it'll be a massive chapter if so. I'm going to start posting on AO3 too (shurata) whenever I get around to it though, eventually just moving everything over there. I'm excited to try out the tagging system.
Thanks to everyone who kept finding this and reading it over the years! It kept me from forgetting about it :')
