Originally posted on NFA Community - March, 2012

Fathers and Sons Challenge, - Winner – 6\23\2012
Episode Tag Challenge – Honorable Mention – 3\21\2012
(Episode - "Penelope Papers" Season 9, Ep 3)

Pretty sure this was posted here as well, but since it's not here any longer - I'm re-posting it now.

It had been a difficult case for his computer whiz of an agent and he'd given the young man all the leeway he'd taken, almost no questions asked and genuine understanding and sympathy given, a rarity in itself. When Tim McGee had stuck his neck out and taken off out of the squad room to go talk to his grandmother without so much as giving the boss any information to go on; or even asking permission to be the one to talk to the woman who'd popped up as a person of interest right smack dab in the middle of their case, Team Leader Leroy Jethro Gibbs had known this case would be far from normal.

He'd done his best to keep his agent from losing focus while still trying to protect his grandmother from whoever it was that happened to be behind this string of murders and web of secrecy. Gibbs had to give Tim credit. They all did. The young man had kept his head in the game and helped solve the case without completely going off the deep end and without compromising the Agency's integrity or policies. On top of that he'd kept a damn good lid on his deep-seated emotions, that was, until it was time for Gibbs to interrogate the woman whom the team leader soon found out, meant more to his agent than anyone else in the young man's life.

Why he'd let Tim stay in there with him while she was being questioned, Gibbs still didn't know, but what he did know, was that he'd learned a hell of a lot about his agent from that string of events, starting with Tim actually speaking up against him in protection of his grandmother. He supposed it could be chalked up to pure shock; the fact that he'd sympathized with the young man as he ripped his own heart out and pasted it on his sleeve for once.

"Enough!"

It had taken all Gibbs' self-restraint not to tear Tim a new one as he ushered his obviously angry agent out into the hallway after that interruption.

"Go home, McGee, you can't be professional. Go home."

"Boss, I won't let you treat her like that; she's my grandmother."

"She's also the lead witness in a murder investigation. What do you want me to do, needlepoint my questions?"

"She had nothing to do with Lt. Booth's death."

"I never said she did."

"What are you going to do? Are you going to break her down until she cracks?"

"That's how it's done, Tim. I don't like this any better than you do. I know that she's a family member."

"Boss, she's everything to me."

"I know."

Gibbs reply had been uncharacteristically soft with compassion. But, it was the interrogation of the older woman with her grandson present that had shifted things for him, more specifically, the part of the interrogation where Tim had reached out in gratitude to thank his grandmother for all she'd done for him in his life, obviously forgetting about his potential audience on the other side of the glass.

"You inspired him, you taught him so much — about how to stand up for himself. About how to be exactly who he was no matter what anyone else thought. Especially his father. I've always loved you for that."

"You never told me this before."

"It's the truth."

Feeling like an intruder and already armed with the information he needed, Gibbs had walked out of the observation room at that point, needing to get Tony and Ziva on the trail of the right people of interest in the case. It hadn't taken long for all thoughts of that personal conversation he'd overheard to escape to the recess of his mind, replaced by case work and the need to solve it.

He'd watched Tim come back to his desk, ready to work, back on track, proving he had what it took to get the job done. It had been easy to see that his attention had switched over to what was needed to find the people that they needed to talk to in order to move the case forward. No further interruptions arose; that was, until Penny had almost been run down deliberately while Tim was watching not twenty feet away from her.

When the case was done and reports finished, however, Gibbs found himself overhearing yet another conversation between Tim and his grandmother as he was coming back to the squad room after a coffee run at the end of the day.

"It comforts me to know that you're with such a good group of people. I'll admit, even Gibbs has begun to grow on me a little cold, despotic ways - really part of his charm," Penny said. "Who knew?"

"He actually reminds me a lot of..." Timmy faltered, then continued, "you know, a little bit."

His father? Gibbs silently asked himself. "I remind him of his father? They'd heard precious little about the man, other than the fact that he was a Navy Admiral. Actually, this explained a lot about his youngest field agent and his ever-present need to have the boss' approval. While that need had visibly diminished greatly over the years, Gibbs still saw clear signs of it; in Tim's reports; in his constant need to be doing something instead of letting himself lighten up from time to time and in his barely visible need to look around for Gibbs before he dared to do anything not work related. But, going from what little he'd overheard in the interrogation room earlier, the Team Leader's gut clenched at Tim's comparing him to that description of his father.

"Yeah," Penny said. "In other words, he loves you but has no idea how to show it."

"Does he?" Timothy sounded so...skeptical and uncertain. Gibbs realized he'd never heard him sound vulnerable before. His heart hurt for him.

"Oh sweetheart, he loves you so much." Penny sounded very certain as she insisted, "He always has, Timothy. Deeply." A slight pause followed, then she said, "You need to take the first step, Timothy. Call him."

"It's been almost seven years. I wouldn't know what to say." His agent sounded deeply uncertain, and even scared.

Gibbs found his mind going into shock. Seven years? His youngest agent had been without his father's support or influence for the past seven years, all the while Gibbs hadn't offered nearly as much support to him as he had to his other team members who at least were able to keep in touch with their fathers? Well, with Abby it was a little different, but McGee?

Penny's voice interrupted Gibbs' thoughts with her insistent tone. "Oh, you're a smart boy. You'll figure it out."

Behind the divider that separated Tim's work area from the rest of the back part of the 1st floor, Gibbs silently huffed in laughter, a smile on his face as he pictured the exasperated look on Tim's face.

As Penny bid her grandson goodbye and left him to make the decision about whether or not to call his father, Gibbs heard the young man drop down into his chair and let out a huge sigh that sounded as if it carried the weight of his sorrow filled-heart with it. The Team Leader headed for the break room. This was one conversation he didn't want to deliberately eavesdrop on. He hadn't meant to overhear the other two; but found himself profoundly grateful that he had.

Finally, he felt like he was actually getting to know who his youngest agent was on the inside; what made him tick. It had been a long time coming and was long overdue. He found himself hoping he could find a way to be of more support to Tim from now on, whether or not he was able to reconcile with his father. It was the least he could do, as Team Leader who was supposed to care about each of his team members as individuals as well as agents.

Going back to his desk, Gibbs was surprised to find Tim still at his desk; looking so lost in his thoughts, he wasn't even disturbed by the boss' return. In a surprise turn of events, Tim reached out to his desk phone and picked up the receiver, dialing a number by memory as he brought the receiver up to his ear, his eyes still staring off into the distance in the direction of Tony's desk.

"Hi, Dad? It's me, Tim."

As Gibbs watched silently from across the room, nothing else was said on Tim's side of the conversation but the young man's shoulders slumped and his hand returned the receiver to the cradle a short half-minute later., a look of utter disillusionment and abandonment strewn across his face.

Swearing silently under his breath at the callousness of McGee, Sr, Gibbs rose to his feet and approached his troubled agent. "Hey." He said quietly.

Blinking in surprise, Tim looked up at the boss he hadn't even realized was there. "Boss."

Gibbs smiled at the note of surprise in the young man's tone. "C'mon. Let's go get some dinner. My treat."

Tim blinked in surprise once again. "Boss, it's okay, you don't have to …"

**Thwack**

Rubbing the back of his head, Tim had to smile as he stood from his chair and reached down for his backpack, the pain of his father's cold rejection a mere moment ago, temporarily replaced by the boss' rare headslap. With nothing further said between them beyond the message in Gibbs' normal eyebrow raising, they headed out, riding down in the elevator and walking out to Gibbs' car in equal shades of that silence that for this rare occasion, felt comfortable between them.

All the way to the diner where Gibbs drove them, Tim couldn't stop thinking of his father's reaction to hearing Tim's voice for the first time in seven years.

"So, you've finally decided to grow up and make an effort to talk to me. Let me guess, your grandmother had to tell you to do it. Save your breath because unless you've enlisted, we've got nothing to talk about. Don't waste my time calling me until that happens."

Gibbs watched silently as Tim struggled to fathom whatever his father must have said to him. He hoped that Tim would be able to talk about it, if not with him, then with someone who could help him wade through the muck he seemed to be getting mired in. With a silent internal huff of disbelief, Gibbs corrected himself. He did hope it was himself that this young man opened up to, if only to possibly give the Team Leader a chance to be there for this remarkable young man who gave everything he had to his job every day and asked for almost nothing in return.

He couldn't lie, at least not to himself. After hand-picking and painstakingly helping Tony turn Tim into the fine agent he'd become, Gibbs was feeling a mite bit possessive. He didn't want anyone else trying to help Tim through this, unless of course, it happened to be Penny Langston. That was the only other person he could envision being of any help to Tim; excluding Ducky, of course. But, somehow with this having to do with Tim's father, Gibbs knew Ducky just might be out of step on this. That wasn't to say that Gibbs had the perfect 'fix-it' plan. But, he did seriously want the chance to help him. He'd squandered so many opportunities before, he didn't want anyone to take this one away from him.

Still, there was a time and a place for serious conversation and trying to attempt such a thing before appeasing one's stomach was never a good idea. With that in mind, Gibbs refrained from breaking the silence until they'd entered the diner and taken their seats in a booth. Even then, he kept the conversation neutral, revolving only around the menu. Once the orders had been taken and their drinks set before them, the silence seemed to become almost ominous.

Tim wrapped his fingers around the base of his water glass and slowly began turning it almost absently. The repetitive motion not only held his attention, but seemed to hold back the tension that was stiffening the young man's shoulders. Tim even seemed oblivious to the fact that the boss was watching him with concern. The fact that he wasn't nervously shifting in his seat under said attention, spoke volumes of the distracted state he was in. With the arrival of their dinner plates loaded down with food, Tim's attention seemed to snap back to the here and now as he slowly but methodically began eating without any zest or visible enjoyment. Finally, Gibbs couldn't stand it any longer.

"Something wrong with your food?" he asked quietly.

"I'm sorry, Boss. I'm just not hungry." Tim answered as he set his fork down on the plate quietly and pushed the plate to the side so he could once again, reach for his water glass. As soon as the young man's fingers had wrapped around the glass once more, Gibbs pushed his own plate aside and took the plunge.

"Talk to me."

Tim breathed out a huge sigh and tried to even out his breathing. He knew this chance to talk to Gibbs about his long-standing struggles with his father, would likely never come again. But how could he tell this man that he'd watched with a huge stab of jealousy as he'd reconciled with his own father back when a case took them back to Stillwater? How could he admit to the boss that his own bad mood and questioning of Gibbs' methods back then, were driven by emotions he couldn't control as he watched a father and son reunite, knowing he'd never get that chance with his own father because he father wasn't like Jackson who loved Gibbs unconditionally or Ziva's father who openly admitted that he loved his daughter or like Tony's dad who had been equally vocal about his love for his son or Abby's dad who'd never let Abby go a day without knowing she was loved?

"McGee?" Gibbs pushed, hoping to halt whatever thoughts were keeping the young man silent.

"Boss, I'm sorry." Tim offered, seemingly from out of the blue.

"McGee." The boss warned.

"Back when we had to go to Stillwater." Tim pushed on, for once, ignoring Gibbs' warning. "I was out of line questioning your methods of investigating the case. I guess, I was caught up in something I didn't even realize at the time."

"Jealousy." Gibbs offered knowingly, now that he had information to go on.

Tim huffed out a breath of embarrassment and apology. "Yeah."

"Talk to me, Tim." Gibbs offered as a way of encouraging Tim to let the past go. He, himself wanted to move on to whatever was bothering the younger man about that phone call a little while ago.

Softly smiling in appreciation for the free pass Gibbs had just given him, Tim took a deep breath and slowly let it back out. "He's never forgiven me for not following in his footsteps; for not beating 'the petty childish problem of seasickness' enough to join the Navy. He just doesn't understand, I never wanted to join the navy. I've never had that compulsion to help perpetuate "The McGee Family Honor".

"Does he even know what you do to help the Navy? Your country?"

"Not unless he's ever taken the time to let Sarah or my grandmother tell him about it." Tim admitted quietly as he glanced up at his boss.

Gibbs had to smirk. "Your sister keeps up with what you do?"

Tim smiled in return. "Yeah. Seems ever since you talked to her about her attitude, she's found a new level of appreciation for me and what she knows of my job."

"Meaning you don't tell her near as much as she thinks you do." Gibbs smirked again.

"Yeah."

"I take it your father's still not comin' around, then?" The Team Leader gently brought the conversation back to the crux of the problem he knew his agent still needed to deal with.

"No. He told me that unless I enlisted we had nothing to talk about. Essentially, he said that would never change. Guess he overlooked the age restrictions on his own stipulation for me ever having the expectation of talking to him again"

"I take it you've already figured out that it's not your job to live his choices for your life?" Gibbs asked calmly.

"Yeah. I mean, no, I have Penny to thank for that. It's amazing how she loves my dad no matter what, but she's always been there for me no matter how bad they'd fight over me. I hated hearing them go at each other; especially over me, but hearing Penny do it over and over again, taught me that standing up for what I believed in and what I wanted to do with my own life was the least I could do." Tim explained quietly.

"Sounds like there's a 'but' in there." Gibbs suggested.

"Sometimes I wonder if my father wasn't right." Tim admitted as he glanced once more at Gibbs.

"About?" The boss asked since he knew it wasn't about Tim's career choice. Tim had just admitted that much.

"About not making a difference because I'm just the geek." Tim supplied meekly. "I mean, I know that there's times that I genuinely do contribute more than just the computer searches, but it's like Tony said, 'It's not like it's brain surgery.' Right? Tim asked without malice.

"You heard that."

"Yeah."

"Never said anything."

Tim looked at Gibbs for a long minute before he looked away. He didn't know what to say. He'd long felt the sting of Gibbs' silent agreement with Tony 's smart-assed remark that night that had blatantly disrespected Tim's performance as Case Lead on that jet pack case but he really didn't want to get into that.

"That why you don't speak up for yourself, because your father drilled it into your head that no matter what you did on this job; it wasn't important because you're not in the Navy?" Gibbs shifted the conversation just enough that Tim would understand the previous point wasn't being swept under the rug.

"I suppose it's rubbed off to some extent." Tim admitted.

"Guess I shoulda been head slappin' you a lot more than Tony, then." Gibbs remarked.

"It might have helped. " Tim replied in all seriousness.

"Now what?" Gibbs asked, mentally filing that response away for future thought.

"I guess I find a way to put him back out of my mind. Unfortunately, there's still Penny. She's gonna want to hear all about it and when I tell her the truth, there'll be no end to this. She'll call my dad and they'll start fighting over me again. At least when I stopped talking to him, they didn't have to fight over me."

"Seems to me Penny would take the time to listen to you."

"Yeah. She will."

"You okay to just sweep this under the carpet the way you're talking about doing?" Gibbs pushed.

"Yeah. I refuse to let him get in the way of doing my job. I've learned how to put him out of my mind. I've gotten pretty good at it."

"Heard you mention your dad to Tony a time or two."

"Only when it comes up in a case, Boss, and only in passing."

"So, I've noticed. Doesn't seem to bother you to talk about him then."

"It doesn't. It's only when stuff like this happens that it gets to me." Tim admitted.

"Don't let him change who you've become, McGee. You're your own person and you've earned the right to hold onto that."

"Thanks Boss. I'll try hard not to let his attitude towards me affect who I am."

"Good. Kinda hard to earn your way to the Director's Chair if you did."

"The Direc...?" Tim asked in shock.

"You don't seriously think you're gonna be an agent forever, do ya? You've got too much smarts for that, McGee. Your place is up on that ladder and so long as you hold on to your convictions, you'll get there."

"Thanks."

"You can thank me by following this through, McGee. Stay motivated and keep your head in the game. Don't let people like your father stop you."

"I hear you, Boss. I won't."

"Good."

In silent agreement, they tabled the discussion until they'd asked for and gotten their dinners in to go boxes and headed out to the car.

"Thank you, Boss. For dinner and the talk. If it weren't for you, I probably would have let him get to me this time. But, I guess you know that already."

"You're welcome, McGee. Just remember, my door's always open for you, too."

Tim blushed and looked away. He'd never really believed that invitation included him so he'd never tested it out. It was nice to know he'd been wrong on that.

"Thanks, Boss." Tim offered before getting into the passenger seat of the car.

Gibbs nodded and turned his attention to their journey back to the Navy Yard. Glancing over towards his passenger when they'd almost reached the yard, he had to smile. Tim had fallen asleep and looked just like a little boy. That thought brought a frown to the boss' face. How in the hell could any father put his son through the responsibility of having to follow in his footsteps or else? No child deserved those expectations. Shaking his head, in silent disbelief, he changed the route, heading for his own place.

Tonight, Tim McGee would know what it meant for a father to care about him.

~finis~