Emma never knew how to properly handle rejection. It stemmed from her early years, the constant need to be a part of something that made her forget about being alone in the world. She hadn't felt the certain pain that rejection brought in years, not with how great her life had been going. Killian was everything she could ever want in a partner, and her son had grown into the perfect young man. Still, despite how far she had come, all it took was one failure to bring that familiar feeling back- Regina's demeanor of absolute hopelessness seemed to knock the confidence from within her.
What continued to stir the discomfort was the fact that even after her mother saved Regina from her curse, the same demeanor remained. The Regina she had grown to know surprisingly well was replaced by a lifeless imitation, one impossible of any true connection. That's why, on an average Wednesday morning, Emma found herself knocking on the Mills-Locksley front door, completely unsure about what her plan was.
"She's not going to want to talk- you know that," Snow whispered, contemplating whether or not she had time to bolt before her daughter knocked on the door.
"We just have to act casual. Multiple decades of friendship doesn't just disappear overnight."
Three hard knocks were then placed on the door, and the two women waited in a tense anticipation. Snow just about jumped when the door whipped open, revealing a half asleep Roland in basketball shorts.
"Hey kid!" Emma began, "it's been forever since we've seen any of you guys. Last time I was here half of your family was in a whole other realm."
"It has been a long time," he said, widening the door to invite them in. "Dad's trying to fix the air conditioning and Caroline's upstairs doing something."
Emma and Snow followed the fifteen year old into the kitchen.
"I bet it's been different having Henry gone- he left so quickly!" Snow chimed in, not daring to ask where Regina was.
The three of them took a seat on the couch, each one trying to figure out what their next move will be. Faint thudding could be heard from the garage, Robin attempting to fix the air conditioner.
"The house is definitely more quiet," Roland said, easing into the couch. "And I have my room back. Henry always brings a lot of stuff when he comes to visit."
Emma was trying to formulate some remark about how they used to play video games every Sunday afternoon for months on end to ease the oncoming silence, but she couldn't focus on such mundane things at that moment. Before the quietness became too awkward, the garage door opened, revealing a flustered Regina with a sheen of sweat covering her skin. Her eyes widened with surprise at the two familiar guests in her living room.
"Oh, hey!" Emma and Snow said, almost in unison. "Sorry for dropping in without warning- it's been a slow day."
Regina instantly felt aware of how flustered she probably looked, standing clumsily by the door and absorbing the cooler air. "Hey yourselves," she replied warily, "I was out there talking to Robin, but it's so hot in that garage."
"It's so hot today," Snow said, taking the easy conversation route, "Emma and I both realized that we haven't seen any of you guys in ages."
"I came along because I missed beating Roland at Just Dance," Emma followed, earning an excited glance from the teenager.
Realizing that she had to make her move quick, Snow swallowed her fear and took her chance. "Do you want to go on a drive with me? It's a beautiful day, and we can't let it go to waste."
Regina appreciated her sincerity, but she knew what she was trying to do. Still, despite being in her own home, she felt like she had to agree no matter how strongly she wanted to head back into the stuffy garage.
"Sure, as long as someone checks up on Caroline every now and then. Who knows what she's doing up there."
Snow took a moment to respond, honestly astonished that she agreed so quickly. Before she had time to think of a plan on how their outing would go, Regina was in the passenger seat of David's old and rusted pickup truck, a pair of expensive looking sunglasses already covering her eyes. As the engine started up with a soft roar, Snow realized just how sweaty the other woman was, her skin pale and clammy. She looked like she was just barely holding herself together, like she could fall apart at any given notice.
"So, where are we going?" Regina asked, seeming out of place in the truck as it started down the street. Snow rolled down the windows and slipped on a pair of sunglasses for herself, sending her friend a wayward smile.
"It's almost summer, wherever the wind takes us!"
Her enthusiasm only made Regina feel more unsure of the whole situation. It was already reassuring to be outside without having a direct goal in mind- she tried to embrace the windswept hair and the direct sunlight. Main street quickly came and went, the shoppes dwindling as they drove closer to the ocean. The water was glistening against the midday sun, spanning endlessly before them. Everything was so perfect; it almost made her forget about all of the bad things. It wasn't until she noticed what road they were on that she realized where they were going- up against the ocean backdrop loomed a wooden playground, standing sturdy against the wind. She had an instant memory of ten year old Henry wanting to play there at all hours of the day, back when he had more faith in fairytales than he did in her.
"What are we doing here?" She asked, just as Snow stopped the truck. She watched her stepdaughter as she contemplated what to say. After such a long time of knowing her, Regina knew that she was trying to think of some uplifting speech right on the spot.
"I just like this place," Snow began, peering at the playground with a longing gaze. "I'm surprised there aren't any kids here today- it's so nice out."
"I guess they found other things to do," Regina replied, her voice saddening as she said the words. "Henry used to come here all the time- that feels like a whole lifetime ago."
Snow let out a smile. "I remember that. He was so small then- and that imagination of his!"
She stopped herself before saying something she shouldn't, knowing that particular time in their lives wasn't perfect. Thankfully, Regina didn't seem to mind.
"He read every comic book in the store. I had to keep ordering new ones from the next town over."
"He was such a good kid," Snow said, smiling at the memory. "And an amazing young man- crazy how things can change so much with time."
The two women both became lost in the gaze of the playground, the sight a comfort. Snow gathered up the confidence to turn back towards her friend in the passenger seat, daring to let out her next words.
"I… I didn't know about… everything my father did to you- not until I went back there to find you. I didn't know-"
"How could you have known?" Regina asked, her expression concerned. "You were a little girl, your father was everything to you."
To Snow's surprise, Regina let out a faint resemblance of a smile. "He was a really great father- every kid needs a great father."
Tears quickly surfaced in her eyes. "He was horrible to you- here I was thinking that my childhood was half decent, even with my mother passing away. Turns out there was violence just beneath the surface."
Regina drew a heavy sigh, shaken by the heaviness in her voice. Despite the strong emotions and uncovered memories, she found herself calm, grounded to the earth beneath her.
"It wasn't your place to know. And your father… he was following rules set by his father before him- the Enchanted Forest was a different world. We couldn't help the fact that we were born into that."
"Still, you didn't deserve that… not for a second."
Regina cast her eyes downward, not expecting her statement to have such an affect on her.
"All we can do is move forward," she said, her voice sounding definite. "That's what my therapist keeps telling me, anyways- can you believe I'm doing online therapy with a woman that lives in Chicago? Because I still can't."
Wiping her tears with the back of her hand, Snow couldn't help but revel in the woman sitting next to her. "No, I really can't- you've changed so, so much since we first met. You never fail to amaze me, Regina."
She almost let out a laugh as she thought about all the different versions of herself that Snow had seen. She then thought about all the versions of herself that were still unknown, even to herself, waiting for their time to emerge.
Back at the house, Emma and Roland were fully zoned in on the tv in front of them. They were sitting side by side, both gripping their controller as if their lives depended on it. With the sound so loud, neither of them noticed the front door open. August decided to let himself in after several knocks, immediately understanding the situation once he heard the obnoxious sound effects of his boyfriend's favorite game. Emma and Roland were so immersed in the imaginary world in front of them that they both nearly jumped out of their skin when they noticed the teenager standing in the living room.
"August!" Roland exclaimed, struggling to keep his attention on him instead of the game, "I thought you were coming over after two!"
"It is after two," he replied, glancing apprehensively at the tv screen. "How long have you guys been playing?"
The answer was too embarrassing to admit, so Emma hit pause on the game and took the opportunity to stand up.
"I'm going to check on Caroline and see what she's up to- you can take over for me if you want."
She handed the controller to August, who seemed less enthusiastic about taking her spot in the game. Before he could protest, the blonde was already headed for the staircase. When she arrived at the ten year old's bedroom door, she noticed it was eerily quiet- she gave the door a soft knock, eagerly awaiting a response. She could hear some shuffling around before the door opened, revealing Caroline in her sweats. Having known her for the entirety of her life, Emma could immediately tell that she was keeping some sort of secret. It was written all over her face.
"What have you been up to?" Asked Emma, trying not to be too obvious as she attempted to look beyond the door to survey the scene. "Your mom wanted me to check on you while she's gone."
"Just cleaning my room," the girl replied, not missing a beat, "nothing much. You can go back to playing your game."
"Not so fast," Emma said, opening the door wider to reveal a black box hastily pushed in the corner of her room. "What is all this stuff?"
Caroline knew there was no point in keeping up the charade, so she reluctantly stepped aside so Emma could come in. "I took some things with me when we went through the house my mom grew up in," she said, her voice heavy with guilt. "And I was going to tell Mom and Dad, it's just… well… I don't think they're ready to hear about it."
Emma was aware of an obligation as the adult in charge to reprehend her in some way, or tell Regina the news herself… but Caroline was right, neither of her parents were ready for that conversation. Lowering herself to the carpeted floor, Emma examined the objects more closely, finding herself instantly fascinated by what she was looking at.
"This was really your Moms?"
Sitting down next to her, Caroline nodded, watching her carefully turn the pages to admire her handwriting.
"That must've been so strange to be there," Emma said, realizing that there was a lot to her journey that she didn't know about. "Especially since Zelena was there too. I wonder what she thought about it."
The girl had thought endlessly about that in the last few weeks. "She vanished- there's no way of knowing what her thoughts were."
Her eyes traveled towards the postcard that was off to the side, debating on whether or not she should let Emma in on that information. She knew that Emma wouldn't outright tell her parents, (or, at least her mother) and having more people know about the secret might lead to faster answers. So, she leaned forward and picked up the postcard, handing it over to Emma.
"She sent me this a week ago- it's obviously from her."
Emma studied the postcard with a puzzled look on her face, eventually lowering it with a sigh. "Why'd you keep this from all of us? She was probably hoping you'd find a way down to Florida so she could kidnap you again."
Caroline scowled, taking the postcard back in her protection. "She was just letting me know where she is- or where she was a week ago. How would I even get there? I've never crossed the town line."
"I know," the blonde reassured, "it's just so random is all. She had to have an intention when she sent this."
"Can you not tell anyone? You and Rumple are the only two people that know about this."
Emma hesitated to provide an answer. Secrets had been the one thing to derail everyone's sanity since their return, and one more certainly wouldn't help make things better. Still, Regina definitely couldn't handle knowing that Zelena was reaching out.
"I can hold off for a few days. In the meantime, let me know if she sends another one."
The two of them continued to rummage through all the isolated items from a past neither truly understood. Emma fought the biting feeling in the back of her mind telling her that she was making a huge mistake, that evil was lurking right around the corner.
August would never admit it, but the game Roland had forced him to play was actually enjoyable. Maybe that was only because he was sitting so closely to him and the warmness between them felt so comfortable. He hadn't been keeping up with the time as they continued to pass each level in the game. Everything was measured in the many different conversations that they had, one after another. It all felt easy and natural.
"How'd you do on that history test you were studying for?"
"Okay I guess, I swear some of those questions were designed to confuse everyone."
Roland had to suppress a laugh, knowing that he would say that. "I can help you study next time- as long as you help me with writing all those English papers for my final."
"Technically that would be cheating," August replied, sending him a overacted stern look, "you know, since I already took that class."
"Yeah sure, Honest Abe," Roland chuckled, putting down the controller once the next level was complete. Without the distraction of the tv screen, it was just the two of them on the couch.
"I'll help you pass, don't worry," August clarified with a smile, setting his hand down on his leg. The abrupt physical contact caused Roland's heartbeat to spike, still not used to the feeling. His thoughts began to spin in his head, causing his next words to tumble out and break the silence.
"Can we be official? Like, at school?"
His words hung in the air; thankfully, not for too long.
"I think we're ready- I'm ready." August's blue eyes lit up when he saw the relief on Roland's face, and he couldn't help but lean forward to kiss him. Before their lips met, the garage door opened, revealing Robin with a toolbox in his hands. The two teenagers both separated in the span of a millisecond, their eyes wide with shock.
"Uh, hey Dad," Roland stuttered, rising to a stand, "we were just…"
August awkwardly stood up, coming to his boyfriend's aid. "I was just leaving- see you at school, Roland."
Robin wanted to give him a reply, but couldn't get the words out. He set the toolbox down on the table as the seventeen year old rushed by, soon leaving him alone with his son. They locked eyes with one another, terrified of what the other might say. Amidst the shock, however, Roland wanted to shout with joy- August Booth was officially his boyfriend.