iSam's House
I've never asked this of anyone before, but please, after you've read this, leave a review!
"Hey," Carly greeted, walking up to Sam at her locker. It was the end of the day, and the only thing the two had left to do before they could head out was driver's ed. "Did your mom get back to you?"
"Yeah, she said she had a date tonight with some guy from ," Sam replied, grabbing her driver's ed textbook.
"I thought your mom got banned from that site," Carly replied confusedly.
"She did. But anything can happen when using a fake email," Sam said back, closing her locker door.
"Hmm," Carly said with a shrug. "I guess so. That means your house will be empty, then, right?"
"Yep," Sam said back with a nod. "Completely deserted."
"Great," Carly replied. "As soon as class lets out, we can head over there."
With that, the two girls took each other's hand and walked to driver's ed, their school day almost over.
The fact that her home was very often empty was one reason why Sam preferred to be at Carly's rather than her own house. That, and because her own house was really not nice in comparison to her girlfriend's apartment. Located in a rougher area of Seattle, Sam's house was a one-story, two-bed, one-bath manufactured home. Due to barely anyone ever being there, it was constantly messy, and some appliance or piece of furniture was usually broken as no one was around to fix it. Despite being an actual house, it also didn't really have a nice yard, either. Just a broken-down, paint-chipped picket fence surrounding the property, a scraggly tree in the backyard that housed a dilapidated tree house, built by the previous owners, and a shed that had seen much better days.
Even when the house wasn't empty, Sam would try to make herself scarce as she and her mom…didn't always get along. Sam figured they were just too much alike, personality wise, so they argued frequently. Plus, the only reasons why her mom was ever home for long periods of time were pretty disgusting, in Sam's eyes; they were either to "break in" bikinis, apply ointment to infected areas, or bring various boyfriends over so they could…hangout (which is probably how her mother got so many infections).
Through it all, though, Sam loved her mom. And she guessed her mom loved her, too. It was just hard to tell, when she was gone all the time. Not at work, though. No, the Pucketts mainly got by on different forms of welfare, any money Pam Puckett would con out of her boyfriends, and checks sent to them by Sam's favorite extended family member, Uncle Carmine. Mrs. Puckett spent her time out on the town partying, meeting guys, and generally getting into trouble.
Which was why Sam was sorry for the poor sap who'd have to deal with her mom that night. But also glad that they had a date, as her and Carly could hang out alone at her house. Her mom or any of her "eccentric" boyfriends being there would have just ruined it for them.
The hour driver's training took went by quickly, and soon the pair were walking out the front doors, headed to the Puckett house.
The walk took a bit longer than the journey to Bushwell Plaza did, as it was somewhat farther but in the opposite direction, taking them through the less-desirable Seattle neighborhoods. Sam was used to this, having lived there for nearly all her life, but Carly wasn't, so she kept her guard up the whole time they were walking, constantly looking over her shoulder and scanning the surrounding area.
"Do you think someone's gonna jump out of the bushes?" Carly asked teasingly, noticing Sam's behavior.
"Hey, where I live, y'never know," Sam defended herself. "Besides, you're with me right now."
"What does that have to do with anything?"
"If someone does jump out of the bushes, I have to be ready to protect you," Sam replied, throwing a glance behind her to make sure they weren't being followed. Carly eyed her girlfriend strangely, but then shrugged, accepting her alert demeanor. She highly doubted anyone would dare commit a crime right out in the open, in broad daylight, but nevertheless appreciated Sam's protectiveness towards her.
"Well, you can drop the bodyguard act in a moment, 'cause we're almost at your house," she said, having looked up and noticed that she could see her girlfriend's house a block away. Privately, Sam thought to herself that she'd never not look out for Carly, but she just nodded and walked alongside the other girl, still looking for any threats out of the corner of her eye.
As the house came more into view, Carly thought back to the last time she had been there, about two months ago, the night her and Sam had finally gotten together. Smiling at the thought, she noticed that all the little details of the house had remained the same in her absence. The house had originally been white, but as they walked up the sidewalk towards it, it was still the same dirty, dusty gray like last time. She covered porch looked alright, but the wooden planks making up the steps and deck, she noticed, still creaked noisily under the feet, threatening to give way any moment as they walked up to the door, which made a grating squeaky sound as Sam opened and let them in, its plate glass window still streaked with grime. Upon stepping into the house, the two were immediately greeted with the sight of Sam's three-legged cat, Frothy.
"Awe, hi Frothy," Carly cooed, walking over to pet him despite her slight cat allergies.
"I wouldn't go near him if I was you," Sam warned, shrugging off her jacket and tossing it lazily onto the floor, where she'd just strewn her shoes. "Last time I checked, he was dealing with some worms hanging out of his-"
"Ew!" Carly cried, instantly repulsed as she took a giant step back from Frothy.
All he did was sit down in the hallway and meow loudly at the two.
"He's probably hungry. I don't know when the last time mom fed him. I'm gonna see if there's any food for him in the kitchen," Sam said, walking down the hall and under the kitchen archway, her backpack still slung over her shoulder.
Carly also began inching in that direction, staring fearfully at Frothy the whole time, keeping her distance to avoid contracting any unwanted parasites.
Practically jumping into the kitchen and away from the cat, she breathed a sigh of relief, happy that she had avoided him, then looked over and saw Sam rummaging through all the cabinets and cupboards in the kitchen, in search of food for her feline friend.
"See anything?" Carly asked, looking around. The kitchen was cluttered and messy, but not as disgusting as Sam often made it out to be. Honestly, she never minded the disordered environment at the Puckett house; she always liked seeing where Sam lived, no matter the state it was in. Plus, it just added to the charm.
"No luck," Sam replied, standing up. "I mean, mom doesn't even buy food for me to eat, so I'm really not surprised."
"What do you wanna do, then? I have my debit card with me, we could go to the store a few blocks over and-"
"Nah, I got it. And it won't cost you anything," Sam replied happily, taking her bag off her shoulder and unzipping it. Carly curiously watched, wondering what Sam was going to do, when…
"Oh, no, Sam! Not that!"
"C'mon, it'll go bad otherwise. Besides, I'm sure this tastes way better than cat food."
Sam had taken out her 'bagel spread' from earlier, and was now about to deposit the food item in Frothy's dish on the floor.
"But doesn't it still need to be graded?"
"It was due today during sixth hour. Mrs. Henderson already gave me my mark on it."
"Did she vomit when she tried it?"
"She took one look at it, said 'are you trying to poison me, Puckett?' then gave me a D-plus," Sam said, dropping her creation in the bowl. Surprisingly, it made a loud, satisfying plunk! when it hit the bottom of the dish, and a second late Frothy was there, inspecting the food he had been given.
Sam stepped away, letting her cat eat while she took all the jars and containers out of her bag and put them away in the kitchen. Except for the tuna salad and bagels, which she used to make a nice after school snack.
"You hungry, Carls? I could make you one, too," Sam offered, spreading the tuna around on a bagel. Last time she ate had been at lunch, and she was starving. After Carly had forgiven her, she'd given Sam some money to go through the line and buy food. Which had been good; just another minute without lunch and she would've eaten the spread that Frothy was currently feasting on.
"No, thanks," Carly replied back absently, busy watching Frothy chow down on the amalgamation in his bowl like there was no tomorrow, a worm dangling off his…backside.
She quickly excused herself after that, heading straight to Sam's room, clearing off her messy desk, taking out her homework and getting right down to business. Sam came in a moment later, her bagels already eaten and a glass of Wahoo punch in hand, which she set down on her nightstand before then flopping down onto her bed, beginning the "recovering," process from their "long, hard, strenuous day" by not really doing anything in particular.
While she was mainly focused on her homework, Carly did look up every once in a while to check out Sam's room. It was like seeing another side of her girlfriend, which she definitely enjoyed.
Scanning the room, she noticed Melanie's bed on the wall opposite Sam's, neatly made and untouched, (no matter how much Sam denied it, Carly knew she loved and cared for her twin) an old, battered skateboard resting half-out from under Sam's own bed, and the tiara that Sam won at the Miss Teen Seattle pageant sitting up on display on her dresser. Carly, remembering the fun her and Sam had that night, helping her best friend win and dethrone LeeAnn Carter, smiled and turned her attention to Sam.
She hadn't noticed it, but at some point, Sam had gotten off the bed, retrieved her dusty trombone from the corner, and was now examining it. Interested in what Sam was planning to do, Carly got up out of the chair and walked over to the bed, sitting down at the foot of it. Sam, never taking her eyes off the instrument in front of her, instinctively moved her feet to make room for her love.
"What's that?" Carly asked the other girl, taking her hand and running it gently up and down Sam's lower leg.
"A trombone," Sam said, seemingly not noticing her girlfriend's ministrations.
"I know that," Carly said, shoving Sam's legs a little bit in frustration. "I mean, why do you have it out?"
"I dunno, I just wanted to try it out again. Maybe serenade you," Sam replied, finally looking up to meet Carly's eyes with a shy smile on her face. "I mean, if it won't disturb your work or anything."
"You can serenade me, I won't mind," Carly said back, touched by Sam's offer.
"Great!" she replied, wearing a satisfied grin. "I, uh, think the sound'll be better up here, though. Y'know, next to me. So, maybe you should…"
Carly, taking the hint, moved up along the bed next to Sam, squeezing in next to her. It was a tight fit, because the bed was only a twin, ("twin beds for my twins!" Sam's mom had insisted) but they made it work.
"Okay," Carly said, an amused smile on her face. "I'm ready to be serenaded."
"Cool," Sam said with a grin, then put her lips up to the instrument.
Carly wasn't expecting anything extraordinary to be played. Sam had taken the trombone for two years back when she was still doing beauty pageants, before she and Carly had ever met, as it was a skill that could impress the judges. She'd hated it, though, and when someone was learning to do something they didn't enjoy at all, it usually translated to them being bad at it.
Not Sam, though, because as soon as she began blowing into it, the sounds that came out actually sounded pretty good. She'd heard Sam play once before, for an iCarly segment, but it had been so brief, Carly couldn't really remember it. It probably wasn't as good as this, though.
Carly turned onto her side and propped her head up on her elbow, fully paying attention to Sam play. It wasn't spectacular, but it certainly was impressive for someone who'd only taken lessons for two years and found them to be miserable. But that was Sam for you; it seemed like no matter what she did, she was good at it, whether it be drawing, dancing, singing, or any other imaginable skill, Sam seemed to be remarkably and naturally gifted at anything she tried. Carly was slightly jealous, but mostly impressed.
Sam removed the trombone from her lips and looked at Carly expectantly, obviously wanting feedback of some sort. Carly just began clapping and cheering loudly, mixed in with occasional loud whistling.
"Yeah, Sam! Woo! Bravo! That was amazing!" she cried, loudly praising her girlfriend. Sam grinned her toothy Puckett smile and did a few dramatic little bows.
"Thank you, thank you! You've all been a wonderful audience! But now I simply must go; I have a hot date after my performance, and I don't wanna keep her waiting."
Carly laughed and threw her arms around Sam, burying her smiling face into Sam's neck and placing a small kiss on it. She kissed her way up, up, up, from Sam's neck to her ear, then to her cheek. She stopped when she got to her girlfriend's lips, looking her lover right in her eyes.
"So, who's the lucky girl you've got a 'hot date' with?"
"Well, to be honest, she's nothing special compared to you. Maybe I should ditch her and take you out instead."
Carly grinned from ear to ear before leaning in and kissing Sam fully on the lips, feeling the other girl's lips moving along with hers. She was so awed by Sam's performance and natural talent, plus her humor. Not to mention her good looks…Carly wondered how she got so lucky. To be with someone as all-around awesome as Sam.
She poured those feelings into her kisses, pulling Sam even closer to her, if that were possible. Sam responded eagerly, shifting to be nearer to Carly, allowing her girlfriend entrance into her mouth when she felt her tongue swipe over her bottom lip.
Just as their make-out ses was beginning to get heated, though, both girls pulled away in desperate need of air. They fell back onto the mattress, breathing heavily as they laid side-by-side, flat on their backs, staring straight up at the ceiling. Both of their faces were flushed red, and their hearts were pounding. It had been one of their more intense recent romantic efforts, that was for sure.
Sam's eyes darted down and, seeing the trombone still in her hand, a slow smile spread across her face as she sat up and looked over at her girlfriend.
"Hey, Carls?" she asked, her tone innocent enough.
"Yeah?" Carly replied, her breathing now mostly recovered.
"Would you say that seeing my horn here," she said, gesturing to her instrument, "made you…horny?"
Carly very dramatically rolled her eyes and groaned loudly, shoving Sam a little from how unimpressed she was with her joke, which was the response that Sam had expected. She could only laugh, though, as she thought her joke was absolutely hysterical.
"That wasn't even funny," Carly complained, turning over onto her side, which Sam copied, still keeping the piece of brass in her hand.
"Well, I thought it was. But, seriously, Carly…I think all our kissing, it gave me…a tromboner!" she burst out giggling again, unable to hide her own amusement with her joke. She poked Carly's legs with her instrument a little, for added emphasis to the punchline.
Carly just grabbed the instrument and pushed it away from her, scowling deeply at Sam.
"I wasn't aware of the fact that I was dating a thirteen year old boy."
"Well, I wasn't aware of the fact that I was dating someone with no sense of humor!" Sam protested. "C'mon, I'm using all my best material here."
"That's not even remotely amusing! Your joke was just…icky."
"Icky?! That was icky?! Geez, you really are a priss! If I wanted to be icky, I'd describe, in great detail, a hairy, veiny, uncu-"
Sam's words were cut off by Carly pushing her lips onto hers, and, really, how else could she respond to that? All previous thoughts immediately exiting her head, Sam kissed back with the same fervor and enthusiasm that Carly was kissing her with.
For her part, Carly had just wanted Sam to shuddup. She figured this was the most effective way to do it. The words she'd been saying sure hadn't turned her on; that was for certain.
But all that was forgotten now, as she was currently slipping her tongue into Sam's mouth and slowly reaching her hand out to brush it over the other girl's breasts. Sam's groans of desire just spurred her on more, and she fully grabbed one of Sam's breasts, taking it gently into her hand before slowly caressing it over her shirt. Carly loved Sam's breasts. Particularly, she liked the soft like 'ugn' sounds Sam made in the back of her throat everytime Carly touched them. It always got her excited, knowing how turned-on her lover was. Plus, they looked pretty darn great, too.
Just as Carly was planning on slipping her hand under Sam's shirt (for better access, of course) a loud CLANG! from right beside the bed startled both of them, and they both jumped away from the kiss, shocked.
"Wha-what was that?" Carly asked, panting heavily.
"Oh, I, uh…it was just my trombone," Sam explained sheepishly, scratching the back of her head. "I was holding it while we were kissin', and I guess I got a…little distracted."
"Oh. Okay," Carly said, settling back down on the bed. Sam nodded, and they both laid back down on their sides, just quietly gazing into each other's eyes, no words being spoken.
Then Carly began inching forward a little, her intention to resume kissing Sam, when her girlfriend opened her mouth and began talking.
"Uh, Carly?" Sam asked, her tone hesitant.
"Yeah?" Carly replied. "Is something wrong?"
"No, no, nothings wrong, but…I was just thinkin'..."
"About?" she asked, cupping Sam's cheek with her hand.
"Um…about your Grandad, and whether or not you were gonna let him buy you a car…"
"What?!" Carly asked. "You were thinking about that while we were kissing?!"
"No!" Sam defended herself. "I was thinking about how much I love kissing you, which made me think about how much I just love you in general, and then I thought about how jank it is that your Grandad doesn't like that we love each other, and so then I thought about him offering to buy you a car. Which I only brought up after our kissing."
"Oh," Carly said. "Well, I guess that makes sense. Kinda."
"So, are you?" Sam pressed.
"Well, I haven't really given it all that much though. It's a nice gesture, but…"
"But what?"
"I still haven't fully forgiven him, y'know?"
Sam nodded. She definitely understood.
"It's entirely your decision, Cupcake, but I do have a point that I think is worth considering."
"Oh, yeah? What's that?"
"In my opinion, a good way to get back at your homophobic grandfather would be accepting a car that he paid for, and then…" Sam burst out laughing, unable to contain herself.
"What?! What is it?! Tell me!" Carly demanded, now dying to hear what Sam had to say.
"The ultimate 'screw you' to your Grandad would be us screwing in a car he bought!"
"SAM!" Carly cried, eyes wide and jaw hung open as she swatted the other girl's arm. "How could you say that?!"
"How could I not?!" Sam replied, barely getting the words out as she was laughing so much. "Think about it; having gay sex in a car bought by a homophobe?! That's, like, the best-ever revenge!"
Carly said nothing, but had to admit, it did sound like a good way of getting back at him. Even though her Grandad would never find out, it would also be a really hot secret, just between her and Sam. Plus, going back to their earlier conversation, that was one of the most exciting prospects of getting her license.
And from the way Sam was currently eyeing her, she guessed that was the real reason why she wasn't skipping any driver's training classes.
"Seriously, Carls, think about it, okay? Ponder it real good. If you decide to go for that…well, I'll fully support you, one-hundred percent."
"Of course you would for that decision," she replied, crossing her arms.
"And," Sam said, now using a sincere tone of voice. "I'd support you in any other decision you made, too. You know that, right?"
Carly sighed. "Yes, I know that," she replied. Which she did. Sam was always there for her, no matter what.
"Good."
"But don't you think I'll fail my road test, first try?"
"Well, yeah, but your Grandad doesn't need to know that. Just take it a second time and when you pass, tell him then. Now, where were we?" she asked, leaning in, lips pursed out exaggeratedly for a kiss.
Carly, unable to resist (seriously, Sam had lips your eyes could taste, and they were just so damn soft, too) leaned in to return it, when…
SLAM!
The girls pulled away and stared wide-eyed at each other's faces.
"I thought you said your mom would be gone tonight?" Carly whispered, feeling a little on-edge.
"She is," Sam replied, sensing Carly's uneasiness. She was kinda freaked-out herself.
"Well, then, what was that? It sounded like someone shut your front door. Loudly."
"I dunno," Sam replied, looking back over her shoulder at her bedroom door. It was closed, luckily. But, still…
"Where are you going?" Carly hissed, watching Sam slip silently off the bed.
"To check it out!" she whispered back.
"What?! No, don't do that! What if it's some crazy person?!"
"Then I'll just be an even crazier person! Seriously, Carly, just stay here. Okay?"
"Okay," Carly reluctantly agreed. She knew Sam could handle herself. Plus, she noticed with a smile, Sam had crept over to her closet, reached up to the top shelf, and grabbed her "emergency butter sock" before shooting Carly a reassuring smile and stealthily walking out of her room.
Putting her 'invisible ninja' skills to good use, she silently tiptoed down the hall, to the front of her house, constantly looking over her shoulder to make sure no one got the drop on her. Crime in her neighborhood didn't surprise her in the least, but why burgle a poor person's home?
If someone chose our house to rob, they could not have made a worse pick, Sam thought as carefully stepped towards the living room. Peeking her head in, one glance around revealed to her that the room was vacant. Sighing in relief, she was about to turn around to check the kitchen when-
"Hiya, Sammy."
"AGH!" Sam jumped up and whirled around mid-air, holding up her butter sock to attack with.
"Woah, woah, calm down, there, swingy!" Her mom, Pam Puckett, stood before her, bottle to her lips and her arm held out defensively in front of herself.
"Mom?!" Sam cried, extremely shocked at seeing her.
"I know who I am," her mom replied coolly, tipping the bottle back and drinking from it.
"Yeah, I know that, but why-"
"I let Frothy out when I came in. Did you feed him, 'cause I checked his bowl and there's a huge mess-"
"Sam!" Carly yelled out, running down the hall towards her.
"Carly, what're you doing? I told you to-"
"I don't care, I heard you scream," she said, now standing beside Sam. The moment she'd peaked out and seen Sam's mom standing there, she felt relief wash all over her, and she couldn't help but want to be near Sam, knowing she was safe. She'd been worried that some whackjob had broken in and Sam would be in danger.
"Yeah, it was just my mom. She startled me," Sam explained, gesturing to her mom.
"Hi, Mrs. Puckett," Carly greeted politely.
"Heya, Carly," Sam's mom replied, taking another swig of her drink. Carly never worried about what Mrs. Puckett thought of her; she'd been fond of Carly the moment they'd met, and she'd often heard Sam say that her mom liked her because she kept Sam out of trouble. Sam's mom was always nice to her, but when Sam told her about all the chizzy things her mom would do to her…it made her angry, to say the least, so she definitely wouldn't consider herself Mr. Puckett's biggest fan.
"Mom, what're you doing here? I thought you had a date?" Sam asked.
"I did," Mrs. Puckett explained. "But he didn't match his picture, so I bailed. Not after stealing his wallet, though," she said with a grin, the same Puckett smile that Sam had, as she pulled the wallet out her back pocket.
"Here," she said, opening it up and taking out a twenty. "There's some money for you girls, go nuts. So, what were you two gal-pals up to?" she asked, lifting the bottle back up to her lips.
Sam, handing the money to Carly, answered, "well, we were just doin' homework, talkin', y'know…all the ordinary things." Mrs. Puckett was unaware that Carly and Sam had moved past being friends and were now in a relationship.
Sam's mom gave her a weird look.
"You? Doin' homework?" she asked incredulously. "Must be the influence of this one, eh, Carly?" she asked, elbowing Carly a bit. Carly laughed nervously.
"Yeah, well, Sam actually hasn't started on her's yet, but she will," she said, shooting a pointed look at her girlfriend.
"Homework for what? Driver's ed? How is your teacher doing, by the way? Mr. Cal-"
"Speaking of homework, Carly's totally right, I probably should get started on mine! So, mom, if you'll excuse us…"
"Since when is this the freakin' White House? Go, do your homework, hang out, whatever. I'll be in the living room."
Carly thought Sam's interruption was a little strange, but didn't really give it any thought, and instead quickly took her leave with Sam and walked down the hall and back into her bedroom, where they closed the door behind them. Carly sat down on the bed, and Sam returned her butter sock to the closet before shutting the door and leaning against it.
"What's wrong?" Carly asked. Sam was just staring blankly out into nothing. She knew that something was bothering her everytime she wore that expression.
"Huh? Nothing's wrong," Sam replied.
"Something's up," Carly insisted. "C'mon, talk."
"Okay," Sam said, letting out a deep breath. "It's just…I think I should tell my mom. Y'know, about us."
Carly raised her eyebrows in shock. "Oh," she said. That's all she could say.
"Just 'oh'?"
"Well, if you want to…how do you think she'll react?"
"I dunno," Sam shrugged. "But she won't come after you. I think she loves you more than she loves me."
"Sam, c'mon. That's ridiculous."
"Maybe. But, I still think I should tell her. If she hadn't been so loud coming in, she could've walked in on us. I just think it would be better if I talked to her directly."
"Okay," Carly agreed, seeing Sam's point. "I'll be right here when you do it."
Sam nodded, walked over and got a little good-luck kiss, then stood up straight and walked right back out into her home.
Mrs. Puckett sat on the couch, drink in hand, watching some movie on their old, staticy TV. Sam's mom was an on-again, off-again, functioning alcoholic. She never beat Sam or anything like that, but was just always off at a party, looking for a good time. Which, for her, usually included the drink (and a skeevy guy). Sam disliked it, but at least her mom was a happy, agreeable drunk.
"Hey, mom?" she asked cautiously, standing at the archway.
"Sammy, what's up? I thought you were with Carly?" she asked, looking over at her daughter.
"Uh, yeah. Actually…there's something I needed to talk to you about," she started nervously, toeing their worn-out shag carpet with her sock.
"Well, come on in, siddown. No use twiddlin' around at the doorway," she muttered, taking another drink. Sam walked in and took a seat on the couch, right next to her mother, who muted the TV.
"So, what's on yer mind, kiddo?" Mrs. Puckett asked, muting the TV.
"Um…it's just…" she stumbled, looking for the right words.
"You're not pregnant, are you?"
"What?!" Sam cried, jumping off the couch. "No, I'm not pregnant!"
"Well, then what the hell else would you be so nervous to tell me about?" Mrs. Puckett demanded, downing the rest of her drink and leaving the empty bottle on the couch as she also stood up.
"It's about…me and Carly, mom. We're…dating. Like, together. In a relationship. Not friends, girlfriends."
Sam was nervous; she had no idea how her mother would react. They'd never talked about things like this before, and her mom was definitely, almost aggressively, straight. With the amount of "boyfriends" she'd had in their house, there was no mistaking which team Pam Puckett played for. Which made Sam all the more worried about her mom's judgement.
When Mrs. Puckett still hadn't said anything after about thirty seconds, Sam timidly waved her hand in front of her mother's face.
"Uh, ma? You still there, or…?"
"You and Carly are…an 'item'?" she asked, finally.
"Uh, yeah. Yes, we are," Sam answered, trying to sound confident.
"Fer how long?"
"Um, I'd say…about, over a month now. Yeah, probably closer to two."
"Oh," Mrs. Puckett said. "Well…I'm sorry you didn't think you could tell me."
"What?" Sam asked, not understanding.
"Sam, I've been your mom your whole life. And I may not have been the best mom—dammit, I know I haven't always been the best mom—but don't you think I've noticed things about you?"
"Mom?"
"When you were a little kid, knee high to a grasshopper, and you used to have this babysitter, Miss Shelly—you remember Miss Shelly, don't you?"
"Uh, no," Sam replied, shaking her head.
"Well, she was this teenager who lived in the same neighborhood as us, back when we were in that apartment in Portland, and every time she'd go home after watchin' you and Melanie, you'd always say, "Mom, Miss Shelly is so pretty. Prettier than anyone else, ever." You couldn't've been older than three when you were sayin' that."
"Oh?"
"Mhm. And some people might say, 'ah, little kids, they don't know what they're talkin' about,' but you know what? Not once did Melanie ever say anything about how pretty Miss Shelly, or any other girl, was. So, y'know, I guess I've always kinda suspected…in the back of my mind."
Sam didn't know what to say. Her mom…had paid attention to her? She wasn't abusive, but neglectful…yeah, that word fit Pam Puckett pretty well.
"I'm sorry, Sam. I'm sorry you didn't think you could tell me. Until you were two months into a relationship. I understand, though. I know I might've…done things, in the past, to make you think…" Mrs. Puckett had to stop talking now, as she had tears watering up in her eyes. Sam stepped forward and placed a hand on her mom's shoulder, reassuringly.
"C'mon, mom, it's okay," she said. Mrs. Puckett shook her head.
"No, it's not. I should've…this should've been different. I wish, the first moment you knew, with Carly, you could've told me."
"I know, mom." Sam nodded. "But I'm telling you now."
"Yeah, you are, kid. You are," Mrs. Puckett said, sniffling back tears. She grabbed Sam fully and brought her in for a hug. A nice, warm, enveloping hug, as she was quite a bit taller than her daughter.
They stood there for several moments, just holding each other, enjoying a rare moment of mother-daughter closeness, before they pulled back. Mrs. Puckett looked down at her daughter, a few loose tears streaming down her face as she held Sam by her shoulders, wearing a small smile.
"Anytime you wanna talk…about your relationship, or if you need advice, or really anything…just let me know, okay? I may not always be around, but…I have ways of getting places, quick."
Sam nodded.
"You can always come to me, about anything regarding you and Carly, okay? I'm sorry for not being there for you as much in the past, Sam. But, from now on…I can't change overnight, yanno, and I wasn't cut-out to be a nine-to-fiver, but you just say the word, and I'm there."
"Thanks, mom. Like, just…I dunno, thanks. And I don't expect you to change, but…" she trailed off, unable to find the words. Her mom seemed to understand though, and she just smiled and nodded.
"No problem, Sammy," Mrs. Puckett replied, tousling her daughter's hair a little, which made her laugh and she immediately started combing it out with her fingers, trying to fix it. "Thanks for tellin' me. I mean it."
"Of course, mom. I'm glad I told you. Really."
That made her mom smile, and she pulled her in for one more quick hug.
"Alright, ya turd," she said, pulling back to look down at her daughter. "You should probably get back to your girlfriend. Rule one of dating a woman: never keep her waiting."
Sam laughed. "I'll try to remember that, ma," she said, stepping towards the archway to leave.
"Oh, and Sam?"
She stopped, turning back to look at her mother.
"Yeah, mom?"
"It's gonna be a lot easier for Carly to keep you out of trouble now."
"Oh, yeah? How?"
"Same way I control all the people I date," she said with a shrug. "This."
Sam's eyes bulged out of her head and her jaw dropped in horror as she watched her mom, a twisted grin decorating her face, make a 'V' with her fingers and place it directly over her crotch.
"MOM!" Sam cried out in disgust, her nose scrunching up at the sight. "That's so…so…"
"True!" Mrs. Puckett said with a laugh, throwing her arms up in the air. "She's not gonna have any problem keepin' you in line any more, now that you've got an extra motivator."
"You're sickening, you know that? Sayin' that to your own kid. Jesus."
"Yeah, yeah, whatever. You've already been scarred enough, what's a little more damage gonna do?"
"A lot. I'm about to go knock over a convenience store."
"Not if Carly has anything to say about it!"
"Ugh!" Sam grimaced. "G'bye, mom. See you in therapy."
"Bye, Sammy!" she yelled back, laughing her ass off. "Remember to use protection! Oh, wait, you don't need to!"
"Har, har. You're super funny," Sam said, then quickly whirled around and began walking down the hall, not wanting to experience anymore trauma for the day. She opened her door, walked in, closed it, and looked to see an expectant Carly sitting cross-legged on her bed.
"Well?" she asked eagerly. "How'd it go?"
"You were right, Carls. My jokes really aren't that funny."
You guys are so lucky, I was gonna wait to post this until about the 17th, but dammit, after seeing the KCAs last night and Season Two of iCarly Friday, I couldn't help it! I wanted to get in on the fun! I wrote this chapter a long time ago, back in February, and its great finally being able to post it. I had a lot of fun writing it, and thought it was a great addition to the story. But I recently got some writing advice that said "if writing is fun, you're doing it wrong." Basically, what was meant by that, is if you're enjoying it, you're not doing what's best for the story. That's why I'm literally begging, please, everyone leave a review on this one! Guests, past reviewers, whoever; I need to know. Was this funny, in character, and in-line with the story? Or just a big miss? I liked it, but I'm always trying to get better as a writer, so please, let me know. But anyway, I hope you enjoyed (you can let me know that in a review!) and please stick around for the rest of the story. There's plenty of funny, sweet moments left for this tale.