Chapter 2

Arthur was staring into the fire when Merlin returned. Piling wood at Arthur's feet, Merlin stood back, then sat across from him. He knew that it was coming, the questions.

When Arthur asked him about how he knew the place was sacred, Merlin shrugged, thinking it obvious. But as Arthur continued to stare, Merlin said, "Everything here is so full of life. It's as if the world is vibrating. As if everything is much more than itself."

Arthur gaped at Merlin as if he thought Merlin had lost his mind. Then Arthur hunched down again, gazing into the fire, silent.

When Merlin couldn't take any more, he asked Arthur what he was going to do.

Shaking his head, Arthur murmured, "I don't know. My heart says I should do anything I can to save Mordred. But I have seen what misery unfettered sorcery brings. Before my father outlawed magic, Camelot was almost destroyed by sorcery. In my own time, Morgana has used it for nothing but evil. What would you do in my place?"

Would Arthur listen to Merlin? So many times, he'd dismissed Merlin's warnings, mocked his fears, or ignored him completely. But with the visions swimming around in his head, so full of contradiction and heartache, Merlin didn't know what to do. He was afraid of saying the wrong thing and pushing them all toward destruction.

Instead, Merlin mouthed something about protecting Camelot, that it was a just and fair kingdom for all, something almost trivial, something he would say any day, something that was wholly inadequate for the moment at hand.

Arthur must have seen through him. Watching him closely, Arthur said, "If I do save Mordred, all my father's work will be for nothing. Sorcery will reign once more in Camelot. Is that what you'd want? Perhaps my father was wrong, perhaps the old ways aren't as evil as we thought. So, what should we do? Accept magic? Or let Mordred die?"

Merlin's heart, weighed down with destiny and Kilgharrah's warnings, was pushing him to say the words that would condemn them all, that Mordred had to die so that Arthur could live.

But when Merlin opened his mouth, he couldn't do it. Feeling the magic in the glen, of life and energy, the sweetness of something bigger than himself, it was impossible to lie. His visions at the spring had shown him the way, the possibilities beyond an either-or choice.

"Let magic return to Camelot. Mordred doesn't deserve that fate," Merlin murmured.

"Let magic return?" Arthur gaped at Merlin, his face showing his disbelief. "I've seen you fight against magic time and time again or else cower behind trees in terror. You've counselled me to follow my father's work. I've always thought you feared magic."

"You have only seen the horrors of sorcery. Morgana, the monsters we fight, the unfettered magic of men driven mad with power. But there's more to it than that." Merlin shifted closer, hoping to get through to Arthur before it was too late. "Magic is all around us. Yes, it's hidden because to bring it out into the open in Camelot is to court death. But I've seen the goodness of it when used properly. Saving lives, fighting against injustice, helping crops to grow. A whirlwind used to defeat bandits." Merlin gave Arthur a quick, sad smile, remembering Ealdor and Will.

Arthur must have remembered him, too. "Will was a sorcerer."

"It wasn't just Will. The Druids use nature magic to help them survive. Others use it to make their lives better. Would you execute them for feeding their children or healing the sick?" When Arthur didn't reply, Merlin sighed. "Your father would have. He threw children in the well and watched them drown. He executed people who unknowingly rented a room for the night to sorcerers or sold them supplies. He chopped people's heads off on suspicion alone or watched them burn alive, screaming, for using a bit of hedge magic. Is that just or fair?"

"I've never heard you say such things before. Have you always felt this way?" Arthur said. He looked pole axed, as if he had had no idea of how Merlin truly felt and now couldn't wrap his head around it.

Merlin shrugged. "I like my head on my shoulders. If I'd said anything even mildly positive about magic, can you imagine your father's reaction? Or yours?" Arthur scowled at that, but Merlin just said, "Your father was obsessed with magic, seeing sorcery in every blade of grass, in every side-long glance. And you, you didn't change the laws when you became king. What else could I say?"

"You could have been truthful," Arthur insisted.

Perhaps it was time for some hard truths. After all, Arthur was demanding Merlin tell him so. Perhaps Arthur needed to see that it worked both ways.

Taking a deep breath, still worried about it all but determined to see it through, Merlin said, "Arthur, you told the Druids that they could live their lives in peace, but what peace could they have when the laws mean death? It's one thing to look the other way, but you have those in power willing to hound them, drive them from their homes, and you do nothing to change it." Arthur glared at Merlin, then turned away, looking down at the firelight.

When Arthur remained silent, Merlin knew he needed to push. Otherwise, he would reject Merlin's words out-of-hand. Merlin asked again, "So are you? Going to change it?"

Arthur's face hardened, but he still didn't meet Merlin's eyes. "Magic is evil. How can I see it any other way?"

"The hearts of men determine what is evil. Magic is just something they might use to bend others to their will. As would a sword or an army at their back." Arthur looked up at that, still frowning but he seemed to be thinking, too, beyond his automatic hatred of magic. More gently, Merlin said, "I cannot tell you what to do. I believe you want to do what is best for your people and for Camelot. But you should do what is best for all of your people."

Arthur jerked back a little at that, almost as if Merlin had struck him and Arthur was only just realising it. Picking up a stick, stirring at the flames, watching the sparks fly up and disappear into the night, finally turning back to Merlin, Arthur said, "And if I agree? How would I keep sorcerers from overrunning Camelot as Morgana tried to do?"

"You once said you thought you had a guardian angel. You were righter than you know." Merlin leaned forward, staring at Arthur across the fire. He thought of revealing his magic, the heartbreak of lying to Arthur every day weighing heavy on his heart, but he knew it wasn't the right time. There were more important things to deal with just then. Instead, he said, "Arthur, there are many with magic who help you every day. But you do not see it. To reveal themselves means the axe or the pyre."

"Is it Gaius, then? He admitted to using magic in the past." When Merlin shook his head, Arthur insisted, "Do you know them? Who have you been hiding all this time?"

"I would not betray them when they've done nothing wrong," Merlin said.

Arthur narrowed his eyes, clearly unhappy with Merlin's answer, but it didn't matter. It wasn't only his life on the line, but Arthur's.

Merlin said, "You asked me for my opinion. And here it is. Accept magic. Create laws that punish crimes, not for using magic, but for the crime itself. Theft is theft, no matter how it's done. And ask the Druids to help. They are peaceful people and many trust them to do the right thing." Merlin hesitated, then said, firm and clear and strong, "So do the right thing."

For the longest time, Arthur just sat there, staring at the glowing coals. "And Morgana?" He looked up then, watching Merlin's face.

Merlin still blamed himself for what Morgana had become. Wishing with everything in him that he had made other choices, that he'd steered Morgana into the light instead of the darkness, still there was nothing more he could do. She would always hate him. Whether she would hate Arthur if he changed the laws was unknown, but Merlin hoped, just the tiniest part of him, that she would turn again, back into the caring person she once was.

Merlin gave a long, drawn-out sigh. "Morgana craves power. If she didn't have magic, she would have used some other tool to gain it. I'm not sure she can be saved but if anyone could do it, you could." Giving Arthur a little nod, Merlin said, "Until then, be the just king I know you want to be."

Arthur didn't reply.