Dear Readers, I am sorry for the year long delay in posting the next chapter to this story and hope you guys will forgive me for real life getting in the way. I can't say when I will update next so, I hope you guys enjoy this chapter 3 3
Chapter - IX Guilt and Obligation
- Meryton -
As, she went back to her new room to don her walking dress and her hat she found a previously unnoticed soft very expensive pashmina shawl in her travelling bag. The shawl that had once been gifted to her dearest friend one Miss. Jane by her, perpetually negligent yet occasionally indulgent father.
The shawl brought about another bout of tears of frustration and then a sad smile as she draped it over her mismatched dress and as Elizabeth closed her eyes she could feel the warmth carried over by the slender arms of her dear friend as she tightly embraced her as if, protecting her from the harsh realities of the world.
Elizabeth wiped her tears and then bracing herself went to the library to inform Father Bennet of her desire to acquaint herself with her new surroundings to which her uncle replied;
"Now, I know you desire a walk Elizabeth but Mr. Hill is a little busy to accompany you and I need to visit a few families today but, I have a lovely distraction that may suit your tastes, do you like gardening my dear? There is nothing better to calm the soul than Mother Nature."
And, so begin the start of Elizabeth's new passion gardening. A previously ignored pursuit and now a reluctant hobby for lack of better options, as even Elizabeth could not spend her whole day just reading at a book.
Slowly, Elizabeth's life at Meryton formed a daily routine and the stability provide by doing the same set of tasks everyday allowed her to keep her panic at bay. Even, if it was only just a momentary distraction.
Five days in to her daily routine Elizabeth decided to break her self-imposed boundary and walked towards the flimsy stone wall guarding the house and then seeing no one looking chose a very unladylike route to get out of the property rather than just choosing to walk out of the gate.
As, Elizabeth trekked down the country lanes she could not help but be impressed by her silly mischief and was startled when she found a tall figure chuckling at her equally amused by her abandoning her "so called feminine modesty".
"Miss. Elizabeth, I see you are enjoying this fine day." Mr. Darcy called out to his new friend.
Blushing Elizabeth replied "I see you are amused by my unabashed enjoyment of the wonderful weather that we are experiencing today Mr. Darcy".
"So it is Madame. I could not help but, admire your childlike joy and energy for the day." Darcy half-jokingly replied.
"Well, I believe we should all retain our inner child for days like this Mr. Darcy." Elizabeth smilingly replied and then asked about the reason for his visit to Father Bennet, his answer to this enquiry was very ambiguous and resulted in a grim shift to his previously pleasant mood. Bidding her an abrupt farewell he just stated that;
"Something really bad has happened Miss. Elizabeth. I need Father Bennet's guidance to satisfactorily resolve this situation."
When Darcy reached Father Bennet's library to discuss the matter that had been plaguing his mind since yesterday, he was met with the shocking scene of the older man finishing gulping a glass of hard whiskey and then instinctively reaching for another.
"You seem to be in a drinking mood today Father."
"It seems like a drinking day Darcy." Father Bennet softly replied.
"It looks like you have already been made aware about the reason of my visit." Mr. Darcy questioned his friend.
"This world is a place of great suffering my son. We might try our hardest to live an honest life but we can still never completely separate ourselves from the passions of the world. The suffering we being about through are actions know no re-compensation."
"So, may I presume that you have already been made informed about Miss. Georgiana Jones's suffering?"
"The matter reached my ears through my own brethren Darcy. I understand that your father gave away the dear girl in to Mr. & Mrs. Jones hands and willed you to be raised separately. But, you must lend a helping hand now. The girl is in a fragile state and old Mrs. Jones cannot provide much support except in the form of her compassion. I must not speak ill of the Church but you must understand that my views towards how I must help society are unconventional and even unnatural as a priest. You understand me don't you Darcy?"
"I know I must help. I know I did no wrong but even then my shame knows no bounds Father."
After taking a long breath Darcy speaks again;
"I should have done more for the poor girl rather than just sending an enquiry after her health to Mrs. Jones every month. I should have done something."
"You might think your shame knows no bounds. But, I must tell you my sin is far greater." Father Bennet replies with moisture laden eyes. Not even trying to hide the tears rolling down his bearded face.
Mr. Darcy wearily met Father Bennet's guilt shrouded eyes and asks "What sin have you committed Bennet?"
"The same one that was repeated by your father. A man losing his forbearance to lust." Father Bennet shakingly replied and then continued;
"Except mine was an even graver offence as; I faulted upon the vow of chastity that I had made to God. My selfishness brought shame not just to me but also to the women that I claimed to love and my poor illegitimate child. I brought shame both to my dearest Lizzy as well as my chosen profession. You do not have half the faults that I have Darcy. Do not allow yourself to develop a false sense of guilt for your father's mistakes. It's not an easy burden."
This unsuspecting revelation made Darcy hurriedly pour himself a glass of whiskey from the half full decanter and stoically agree with Father Bennet's earlier pronouncement;
"It indeed seems like a drinking day Father."