AN: Okay, so I forgot about one scene so we won't actually get to the marina in this chapter. But the much-dreaded feedback moment with Mitchum is in the second half of this chapter. Also, if you pay attention - there's a very important little scene that left out on purpose - can you guess?. Anyways - please read and tell me what you think!
Chapter 54
Rory was having an early lunch break at the cafeteria on the ground floor of the building where Stamford Eagle Gazette was located, having focused on her internship two days in a row thanks to her school schedule loosening up before finals a little. But naturally, to make up for her study-time, she had her notes with her, one of the binders open in front of her, while she, without looking, tried to stuff some chicken salad into her mouth and chew, only having 30 minutes before she needed to head back upstairs for the meeting Mitchum had called.
She'd already gotten her dress early that morning when she'd been over with the intentions to help her mother decorate Sookie's place for the babyshower, an idea of which had been cut short due to Sookie going into labor. Boy, this was a busy day already. But thankfully, she now had her flowery summer dress - slightly bohemian in its look which was very trendy these days but which she'd barely worn last summer, not feeling confident enough to pull that very low neckline off back then - hanging in a garment bag in her cubicle to be worn later for the engagement party. She was going to have to get dressed at work, but at least she'd be in the Bridgeport marina in good time.
Suddenly, her phone rang, forcing her to swallow her last bit a little too quickly.
"Hey," Rory mumbled, between coughts, ro her mother as she picked up. "How's it going?" she added. She'd been feeling kind of quilty recently for not talking to her as much. Her world was positively overwhelmed by Logan and their new life, and she had to admit, she no longer called her as much.
"Oh fine. She's all checked in," Lorelai said, talking about Sookie. "Breathing normally, contracting painfully. The cursing should start any time now. Everything as it should be," she added.
"Good. I mean, that was weird, wasn't it? She was like, what, a week and a half early?" Rory discussed the sight having scared her considering her own very recent situation with a pregnancy scare. That could've been her in eight months. She hadn't told her mother a word about the scare or the cyst, not wanting her to worry. She knew that would've meant constant nagging, questions and worst of all - her mother insisting control of her appointments. It was weird enough that Logan knew, but she felt safe with him knowing something that intimate.
"Yeah, those little buggers tend to come when they want to come," Lorelai commented. "Hey, um… you're doing everything you need to do in that area, right?" Lorelai asked, feeling like she was now really late asking that question. But honestly, she'd defended Rory a great deal to her parents, concerning Logan and her living together, and the last thing she wanted was to scare the elder Gilmore's with another surprise baby. That would just prove Richard right and that was the last thing she wanted.
"What area?" Rory asked, feeling confused. Oh, god - she isn't talking about what I think thought she is talking about, is she? - Rory groaned internally.
"Um, protection…, from having something come around the mountain," Lorelai added, sounding a little embarrassed. It was funny hearing her squirm like that, truthfully.
For a moment Rory panicked, thinking maybe somehow her mother knew about her scare. But surely Logan hadn't told her, and she was certain she'd neatly disposed of every single pregnancy test at Logan's dorm weeks ago. It was Logan who'd even paid for them, not her, so there was no way of tracing them back to her. There weren't rumors about her being pregnant were there? - her mind swirled down a dangerous spiral.
"I sure hope so," Rory commented on her last thought, realizing only as she'd said it that her word choice had not been ideal.
"Hope?" Lorelai shot back, disappointedly. "This is not an area where hope is good enough," she added.
"I think I have it covered, and that wasn't an euphemism…," Rory said, rolling her eyes a little. Sure, they were not using double protection - but she'd even set a reminder on her phone to take her pill so she was being more careful than usual and hell - she'd even been to the doctor to check things out like a responsible young woman should in a situation like she'd had. She felt rather proud of having done that, especially considering her doctor was a man.
"Okay, 'think' is not good enough either," Lorelai continued, causing Rory to roll her eyes again. "What kind of birth control do you use?" she asked, making Rory huff internally - "She's asking me this now?"
"Um, I'm in the cafeteria," Rory whispered, really not wanting to discuss this.
"Listen, all I'm saying is you cannot leave it up to the guy, okay? They are not always reliable," Lorelai added.
Rory could believe this - was this again about Logan's reputation and how he wasn't reliable?
"I don't leave it up to the guy," Rory said, realizing this was probably the quicker way to get this talk over with.
"They get into this state, you know. Primordial," Lorelai explained.
It was an odd choice of words, making Rory frown. She knew what she'd meant, of course… she knew that look on Logan too, but hearing that coming from her mother, made her just want to shiver from awkwardness and sink into the ground.
"It's all exciting, but so is eating a gallon of pudding and believe me, you're going to regret that later," Lorelai continued. "I use that as an example because I know you like 'pudding'," she added, making the talk even worse by the use of a metaphor like that. "You've got to figure, if he shoots, he scores…, I mean, look around you, there are babies popping out all over the place," Lorelai continued.
"You're in a maternity ward, you've got a skewed sample there," Rory pointed out, just wanting her to stop.
"So you're caught up on the subject?" Lorelai asked again.
"You've caught me up, society's caught me up, the health channel on cable's caught me up, Miss Driscoll, the gym teacher, my doctor, um… they've all caught me up," Rory listed.
"Miss Driscoll, right - like she'd ever need birth control," Lorelai quipped.
"I'm caught up, honest," Rory assured her mother.
"Okay, good," Lorelai exhaled, sounding troubled.
"Mom, what's going on with you?" Rory asked, having sensed something weird about this sudden panic.
"Nothing..," Lorelai chimed, but Rory knew her mother.
"Mom?" she insisted.
"I might be pregnant," Lorelai spit out.
"Oh…," Rory reacted. This was really not what she'd expected. Rory wasn't even sure how to begin to process that, and she exhaled sharply as a result. "So that's where this is coming from," Rory reflected.
"Blame my mom, she never had the talk with me," Lorelai said.
"How did this happen? I mean if it's true..," Rory said, realzing it was a stupid question, but this was a lot to process.
"Luke and I came home from the magazine party the other night. We were a little loopy and it got… primordial," Lorelai explained, making Rory wish she never heard or used that word ever again. Luke and her mother were cute, but she didn't like to think of them as a sexually active couple. She knew it was normal and expected, obviously,… but Luke was like this neutral, asexual cartoon character in her mind and she would prefer if he stayed that way. "All roadblocks down," Lorelai said, causing Rory to involuntarily think about what that actually meant. What kind of birth control was her mother on, exactly? She grimaced involuntarily at that thought, not really wanting to know.
"I mean, I am always beyond careful," Lorelai continued. "The last time I had my roadblocks down was.. I don't know, count how old you are to the day and add nine months," she added, sounding like she really was panicking.
"But that doesn't mean…," Rory began, knowing far too many facts about odds by now.
"I just ate an apple," Lorelai said as if it was self-evident.
"Uh-oh," Rory reacted accordingly.
"Yeah and I liked it," Lorelai added.
"Whoa!" Rory exclaimed.
"My body is telling me something…," Lorelai added.
"Maybe it's not telling you what you think it is," Rory said, trying to be helpful. It was weird enough that her dad had had a child, but her mother - she couldn't even phantom that. She couldn't imagine not being her mother's only child.
"Maybe it's just telling you to better comply the government's recommendations for food and vegetable intake," Rory suggested, knowing she was grasping at straws. "That's not just propaganda, you know," Rory said.
"Maybe..," Lorelai replied.
"And…," Rory began, hesitantly.
"What?" Lorelai asked.
"Well..Would it be so horrible? I mean, it's Luke..," Rory said, despite her own hesitations, her own recent thoughts about potentially having ended up having a baby with Logan freshly in her mind. After hearing what Logan had had to say - how calm and supportive he'd been, she really could think far worse scenarios, despite their joint relief that this wasn't the time yet.
"Listen, I got to get back to my meeting," Rory said, glancing at her watch, leaving Lorelai with that thought, and began to pack up her things.
The meeting was going pretty well, despite the fact that the initially 2-hour meeting had stretched into four. Everyone was tired, but one of the other assistants had equipped them with coffee, beverages and bagels in the meanwhile. The table Rory had set up with briefing notes and notepads earlier was now a pile of binders, folders and papers - people had brought their A-game.
"How interested are Stamford residents in arts coverage of a city 40 miles away?" one of the senior editors, Sebastian, discussed.
"They're interested," the arts and culture editor, Lucille, replied.
"That just takes resources away from covering local events," Sebastian insisted.
"That are less interesting than events taking place in NYC," Lucille shot back.
"If they're that interesting we should send a couple of our own calendar staffers. Freelancers are a pain in the butt," Sebastian replied.
"So, Franz Ferdinand comes to New York, forget freelancers, you'll go cover it?" the woman teased him.
"I didn't say that, and who's he?" the man objected, causing a chuckle and some teasing about him not knowing the band.
"Mitchum, please, arbitrate," Charlie suggested.
"And spoil the fun?" Mitchum laughed, not wanting to take over.
"It's your money," Sebastian pointed out.
"Money well spent," Lucille noted.
"It's not your money, Lucille," one of the junior editors, whom Rory didn't yet know because he'd been away for two weeks, said.
"Look, keep the system as is. We don't have office space for extra people, let alone the budget," Mitchum suggested, clearly having something more to add.
"Excuse me…," Rory said, a little hesitantly, sitting a little behind Mitchum so her hand signaling routine wasn't working here.
"Rory, yes! What?" Mitchum encouraged in a supportive manner.
"What about getting interns... or college students, college papers staff from the Yale Daily News, The Daily Athenaeum, The Hilltop, The Heights, The Harvard Crimson… - to have a go at those stories. You could assign it to several and see who comes up with the best story even. I'm sure many of them would love to do it just for the experience, or to see Franz Ferdinand," Rory suggested, causing an approving chuckle.
"Almost exactly what I was going to say. Good job, Rory! Get volunteers to pick up what our staff can't cover," Mitchum reflected, nodding approvingly. "Those kids'll jump at the chance," he added, glancing briefly back at Rory, smilingly.
"I'll pick up some slack," Harry offered.
"After you pick up my dry cleaning, right?" Sebastian suggested, laughingly.
"I'll pick that up too," Harry replied.
"Good, Harry - don't let him push you around," Mitchum commented.
"Are we gonna end this marathon before we get to subscriptions?" Charlie suggested. "Please say no," he added and they went on to discuss a few more thing until Mitchum summed things up by having Lloyd crunch some numbers for him by Monday.
After the meeting finished, everyone looking relieved to get out of there to spend their Friday night, Mitchum and Rory stayed behind.
"That was fun," Rory commented, this being the first time she'd witnessed everyone becoming more relaxed and funny as they threw ideas around.
"Yeah, that's the way those things should go - give and take," Mitchum commented, rolling down his sleeves. "The less I say the better," Mitchum added.
"Can I get you anything?" Rory asked, not feeling like she was comfortable just slipping out without asking first. She knew they were both headed for the party, just she was probably going to need some extra time to get ready in the office bathroom.
"No, I'm about to take off here. You need a ride to Bridgeport?" Mitchum replied.
"Oh, I'm fine. I've got my car tonight," she replied, still feeling odd to be kind of treated like family.
Mitchum nodded, not making it a big deal.
"So, I'm going to be pulling back here soon. I've done my damage. It's time for them to take it and make something of it. I'll probably be on Monday, maybe Tuesday - then not so much after that," Mitchum explained. Rory wasn't quite sure what that meant. Was her internship through? She kind of had hoped it would gradually transform into her summer job to be honest.
"Well, I'm happy to keep going, even without you here," Rory suggested, hopefully.
"You know, you and I haven't really sat down and talked about the situation, about how you're doing here," Mitchum then said, making Rory suddenly rather cautious.
Was this what Logan had been concerned about? She by now also knew how Mitchum was rather brutal when it came to feedback, she could already sense that what she would hear might not be what she liked to hear, so mentally she toughened herself up.
"Well, you have been busy," Rory said, in a way hoping that this night wouldn't be it. She didn't want anything to ruin her mood.
"I've meant to," Mitchum said and explained, "I offered you the job, took you under my wing. It's part of the deal."
"Okay, great - feedback is always appreciated," Rory said, remaining cautious but respectful. She was in no place to decline it either.
"Go on and sit," he said and Rory complied, taking a chair for himself as well.
"Well…. I've worked with a lot of young people over the years - interns, new hires," Mitchum began. "I've got a pretty good sense for people's strengths and weaknesses, whether they have that certain something to be a journalist or something else… less, more…, but more or less if they have what it takes to make in this field. It's a tough business, a lot of stress, a lot of budget cuts…," he added.
"Definitely," Rory nodded along.
"And I have to tell you… I guess this really wasn't a real journalistic internship in the first place, but I have read some of your stuff. It's good - but honestly I've seen better. And I don't want you to take this the wrong way - I see you have ideas, good work ethic, you're organized and well-spoken for your age, you're smart, great at anticipating needs, you have drive… I just think it's a different kind of drive than what a reporter might need. As a classical reporter - I don't think you got it. I don't really see you in the trenches or fighting your co-workers over the best stories," Mitchum explained.
"Oh, okay," Rory said, sounding a little disappointed but not horribly discouraged. Sure, hearing her dream of becoming a reporter wasn't gaining a lot of support from him was hard, but he wasn't the first one to point that out. Even Jess had said it, she'd just been too closed minded to hear him at the time. Her dream of being Christiane Amanpour had already years ago began to change into something that spoke not so much about what she did, her job, but the woman as ametaphor for speaking up for difficult issues, being brave in more ways than what involved the warzone.
"Now, guts can be wrong. Mine's been wrong before but not often. I'm sorry, it's not my pleasure to disappoint someone like you, especially you with the extenuating circumstances. But it's healthy, I don't know any other way. I don't B.S," Mitchum said.
"Uh-huh," Rory responded, taking in his words.
"But there are a lot of ways you could go from this - editing, writing of some other kind…, administrative jobs- hell, some assistants make a hell of a good living even, they are well appreciated. But considering your involvement with my son, I wouldn't completely rule out more demanding prospects either…," Mitchum added.
"Other prospects? Like what?" Rory inquired.
"You might... if things alignes also consider management positions in the future. I know it's early days and believe me I'm the last person to hurry you too into something more serious than you're ready for… I've learned that the hard way, believe me," Mitchum chuckled. "But if I were you I'd supplement your English major by taking a little bit more business and economy courses, organizational psychology, maybe some marketing even...," he continued, shrugging slightly.
"Oh… I don't know what to say," Rory responded, feeling baffled.
"Time will tell… but then again I may have just done you a favor - save you from disappointment along the way. I just think having someone like you who knows the field from the inside, has worked in it from the writer's point of view, even if just a little, it's a valuable thing to put into work from the other side. My son may be able to write, but he has no interest in writing or working his way up the way I did when I first started out. You, on the other hand, have a chance to take these different types of internships, try different positions at the Yale Daily News - see which shoe fits. But amongst the two of you... Hey - who knows - you might make this into something…," Mitchum added, leaving Rory very surprised by the expectations put on her.
"Thank you? I guess?" Rory hesitated.
"Okay, let's get out of here," Mitchum rose up abruptly and got ready to leave. "I'll you at the party, okay? And you may not want to tell Logan about everything we talked about… he tends to overreact, make a big fuss, blame me for meddling and what not... You know how he is," he added before walking off, leaving Rory sitting at the table, taking in his words.