Johanna found that she had plenty of time to recover from the incident with Arthur when she realized it had been three days since she'd seen him last. A part of her was wondering if he was avoiding her, though she imagined he was simply too busy to spare the time.
Three days that she had agonized over their last meeting, waiting for him to summon her, but he never did.
She had taken to sitting on the deck at night in hopes of meeting him there, but he never showed.
It was frustrating, stressing so badly over her mistakes, while she couldn't do a thing to fix it. The constant anxiety in her chest was at an all time high.
At some point, she recognized that she would have given almost anything for the bravery to approach Arthur herself, for the sake of their strange relationship. It was around that time that she realized something else- she missed him.
Of course, it was only natural with Danse gone and Haylen being so withdrawn that she should miss the normalcy of having a conversation without arguing the entire time.
Her lessons with Alan Murdoch were not going well, not by any means. He was as exasperating as always, Jo didn't know why she had expected that to change just because he had been tasked with instructing her in ranged combat.
The sky was darker than usual and Jo stared at the ominous green clouds, expecting precipitation at any moment. The Geiger counter on her wrist ticked every now and then from the moisture in the air and Jo was idly waiting for Murdoch to call it a day.
"Sorry, am I boring you vaultie?" Murdoch snapped, drawing Jo's attention away the clouds and back down to Earth. "Is there something more interesting up there? Clouds shaped like rabbits maybe?"
His friends chuckled, apparently finding his comment funny. That was another downfall of training with Murdoch. His friends were always around as well, though they didn't participate in any lessons. Likely, they were only there to antagonize her.
"Not at all," she responded dryly. "Generally, people don't see shapes in nimbostratus clouds." She hoped he caught her sarcasm, but she had a feeling the jab went right over his head.
"Are you kidding me? Get over here and actually try to hit the god damn target!"
"I am trying," Johanna argued, watching the anger dance behind his eyes. Logically, Jo knew he couldn't do a thing to hurt her without chancing the wrath of Elder Maxson. Cade would tell, even if Johanna kept silent.
"You're doing a piss poor job. It's a rifle, not a machine gun. Can't you keep a laser rifle on target?"
His friends laughed and that and Johanna scoffed.
"I simply think that it's past time to return to the ship. The rain is coming soon," she said, looking at the sky again seriously. She hadn't even taken her Rad-X this morning- again, she had slept through breakfast.
"Afraid to get a little wet? You really are pathetic, vaultie."
She opened her mouth to argue and shut it again. He had been born in the Wasteland and the rain was likely nothing that bothered him with the natural radiation resistance the people seemed to have. Perhaps to someone like him, she really did seem pathetic, trying to take instant shelter for a simple rain shower.
The problem was that she was so sensitive to the radiation that she knew she couldn't physically withstand any substantial amount of rain on her skin. The humidity in the air was sticking to her skin, settling in her limbs already and making them heavy.
"I'm sorry, I must insist that we return. I don't-"
"I say when we're done!" He yelled, so close that she felt his spittle on her face. No, a raindrop, she corrected herself, feeling another one on her cheek.
Johanna clenched her hands around the stock of her laser rifle, squeezing so hard that she wouldn't have been surprised to find splinters in her palms later.
"You are a tutor and nothing more to me," Johanna spat nastily, wrinkling her nose in disgust of both his breath and his behavior. "And I'm going back to the ship now."
"Hell you are," he grabbed her wrist as she turned to leave, yanking her back into place in front of him. "You aren't wasting my day! We don't even know how long the rain will be. Just hit the fucking target!"
"You want me to hit the target?" She yelled back, pulling her wrist out of his grip, outraged. "Fine! If that's what it takes to make you shut up!"
Furiously, Johanna leveled her gun to the target and pulled the trigger four times in quick succession.
All the shots were within an inch of the bulls eye, save one that was too far left. Johanna turned to Murdoch, snarling.
"Now you're going to get that vertibird to take me back up to the ship or I'm going to have to tell Arthur!"
"Arthur? Oh, did the vaultie make a little friend up on board? You think he can save you?"
"Maxson, I mean Maxson," she corrected herself, changing to the more formal surname before realizing her enormous mistake. Her relationship with Arthur, whatever it was, was a secret to the population of the Brotherhood, even to Danse.
Murdoch's expression was stony as he studied her for a few long moments.
She was almost relieved when he smiled, but his words chilled her blood.
"You're the Elder's latest squeeze. Of course..."
"You're despicable. It's nothing like that at all," she defended, recognizing the slang and feeling horrified. He thought she was having sexual relations with Elder Maxson. Arthur would surely throw her off the deck if rumors of the sort began circulating.
"Well, come on then Princess. Let's get you out of the rain before your make-up smears."
It was preposterous thing for him to say, as the rain was coming down quite hard now and Johanna thought it was obvious she wasn't wearing any sort of cosmetics, but she did not reply as her Geiger counter slowly ticked away at regular intervals. She needed to get out of the rain.
It was only on the vertibird back to the Prydwen that Jo spoke to Murdoch again, trying to handle the situation systematically, yet delicately. His two friends we on the other side of the helicopter. Over the noise of the machine and their own conversation, she was positive they wouldn't hear anything she had to say.
"I know you don't like me, Murdoch. But that's no reason to spread false rumors," she began with the quietest tone she could manage. He head her, she was certain by the way his smile widened.
"You think I'm going to ruin my Elder's reputation by spreading word around of this... momentary lapse of judgement?"
"I know how the Brotherhood gossips," Jo admitted, deciding not to comment on his view of the situation. "But I'm telling you, it's not what you think."
"Sure. Whatever you say, Princess. Save it for someone who cares."
"We're just friends," Johanna added lightly, extinguishing all of her options in the way of damage control. She would just have to hope it sufficed. Based of the way Murdoch rolled his eyes, Jo didn't entertain much hope.
"The Elder doesn't have friends. You can think that all you want, but you're just something to pass the time, nothing more."
Johanna frowned deeply, wondering if there would ever be a time when she could be around Murdoch without wanting to strangle him. He was so sure of himself and so crass, a rather irritating combination.
If she wasn't so weak and ill from exposure to the elements Jo would have snapped back at him for such blatant disrespect, but she simply didn't have the energy. Her stomach was beginning to turn violently ill and Jo was sure she was going to be sick before she made it back to the ship.
The wind blew roughly, swaying the great machine as the vertibird took them back up to the Prydwen, pelting Johanna's skin with more rain that blew in from the open sides.
She wondered at the other men, watching as they continued to talk amongst themselves, seemingly indifferent to the rain that soaked through their jumpsuits and laid against their skin.
Jo couldn't imagine being without the negative effects radiation caused her and she was immensely jealous of the way it didn't hurt the wastelanders at all.
Her body was beginning to quiver with muscle spasms that accompanied the sickness and Jo prayed silently that they would land soon, before she threw up. She could already imagine the disgusted look on Murdoch's face as he was forced to watch Johanna dry heave and expectorate stomach bile. It was not something that she wanted to come to fruition.
"You okay over there, Princess?" She head Murdoch speaking to her, but all she could manage was a weak nod. She could feel the helicopter docking and would soon be home free. If she still possessed the strength to walk of her own accord.
"We'll take her to Cade," she heard distantly, for at that moment she doubled over and her empty stomach heaved. She was glad she had skipped breakfast suddenly, grateful that there was nothing in her stomach to expel. That didn't stop it from trying as it clenched painfully and tremors wracked her limbs.
She felt someone lift her, more gently than she would have imagined Murdoch to be capable of, but the flash of red hair through her teary eyes was telling. She was too weak to protest as he looped one arm under her legs and placed her arms around his neck.
"I thought you were just being a pain in the ass," he muttered in her ear, only jostling her slightly as he walked over the deck and into the safety of the ship. "I didn't know..."
Jo was so grateful when the irradiated water stopped pelting her skin that she sighed, letting the tiredness overcome her, letting her cheek rest on the chest of the one who carried her.
"Too tired... to be snide..." she muttered into the rough, wet fabric against her face before unconsciousness claimed her.