Anyone still with me? I spent all day writing, I hope someone is out there.

xoxoxoxo

Though she was plenty busy over the next few days with aptitude tests and drills, Jo couldn't help but to miss Arthur in his absence. She replayed his kiss over and over in her mind, smiling to herself more often than not.

She felt like she was walking around in a day dream, lighter than air, even with Murdoch constantly telling her off.

Even now, meeting her squad for the first time, her mind was with him and what he would say as she stood tall in front of her fellow soldiers.

Recon Squad Gladius. Third Battalion.

Her new squad was not what she imagined at all. Murdoch was the senior most knight of their little group, joined by two young knights who Jo only recognized from their previous taunting of her. They were brothers by the name of Warren if Johanna's memory served her correctly. They looked so much alike Jo guessed they were fraternal twins. One brother was taller than the other with a shaved head while the second was wide with muscle mass and a piercing in his ear. The last member was a female knight called Vargas, a latina woman with sleek black hair who also served as a medic.

Johanna looked around at the group and smiled a little. Every member of the outfit was still green in someway, like Vargas who had just obtained the rank of field medic. The twins were still first rank knights, and Murdoch was newly promoted team leader.

They were certainly inexperienced, which Jo supposed could be cause for some concern, but she didn't honestly care. She finally felt as if she were a real part of the Brotherhood and everything that entailed.

She was a part of something bigger, not just living amongst them.

"We're headed out on a run today." Murdoch surprised her by saying. "Suit up, we leave in ten."

Murdoch didn't wait around for any questions, but followed the twins to the power armor bay. Vargas didn't wear power armor either, but she busied herself by checking out her rifle as Johanna stood silently next to her, still trying to comprehend her orders.

"You should get your gun," Vargas suggested with sweet sarcasm. "I assume you should bring a gun at the very least."

"Of course," Johanna stammered to the other woman, blushing deeply. She practically ran out of the room to find her locker which housed her supplies.

Feeling like a pistol just wouldn't be appropriate for her first real field mission, Johanna removed her laser rifle from the locker and took extra ammunition as well. She doubted that they would run into trouble on the vertibird to Sanctuary, but Danse had always said it was best to be prepared.

Her heart thumped painfully against her chest at the thought of her former mentor, and what he would have to say to her now.

It was a pity he was gone to the Glowing Sea, Johanna would have liked to see the pride shine in his eyes as he watched her join the ranks of his soldiers.

Before closing her locker, Johanna slipped her large backpack on, just in case she needed any room to stow materials from the wastes. As a scribe, it was her responsibility to be prepared for anything.

With a little nervous energy, Johanna took a moment to re braid her hair, tightly so that it wasn't in her face, obstructing her vision.

When she returned to the flight deck, her squad was waiting for her, fully equipped near a powered up vertibird.

Jo climbed on, getting a hand up from one of the Warren brothers, who she gave a grateful nod to.

"Okay team. Our objective is simple, it's just a supply pick-up. We get to Sanctuary, find our contact and load the delivery. Think you all can manage that without a visit to the med bay?" He looked at her pointedly and Jo scowled.

She should have known Murdoch wouldn't change just because of a new rank.

Everyone murmured their agreement, a little of the excitement dying out in their eyes as they realized they wouldn't be seeing any combat today. Sanctuary was as secure a town as one would ever find in the Commonwealth.

The ride felt longer than she expected as the group sat in silence, unsure of how to communicate with the others.

"Anyone ever been to Sanctuary before?" The taller of the twins asked, and the vertibird was silent. Vargas shook her head briefly and then continued to stare out at the passing wasteland.

"I have," Jo spoke up, breaking the silence. "It's a wonderful place," she added, remembering how taken she had been with the settlement when she had visited with Danse and Nora.

"What's it like?" Knight Warren asked, his tone full of curiosity.

For the rest of the ride, Johanna detailed the layout of the settlement, told them about the crops, the market, the robot sentries and everything she could remember. When she came to the part about the Deathclaw guardian, Vargas snorted in disbelief.

"Now you're just pulling out legs," she spat out, looking down on Johanna with narrowed eyes.

"No, I'm not," she replied defensively, reeling back. It did sound outrageous, Jo realized. She probably wouldn't have believed it either if she hadn't seen it with her own eyes.

"Come on, those things can't be tamed," Murdoch interjected. "They're nothing but killers."

"They have some sort of technology, though I don't know the specifics… You'll see." She hoped with all her might that the Deathclaw guardian was still healthy and thriving at the settlement, lest she be branded a liar or a crazy person.

"We're coming up on our destination," the pilot announced and the five of them craned their necks for a view out the open doors.

She could see it in the distance. It was lit up and just as impressive as she remembered. There were rows of crops reaching out towards the small creek, tall buildings built up around the rubble of the pre-war neighborhood, stands of electric wire strung up on wooden posts and the beautiful flow of electricity lighting up the streets. She let out a sigh of relief as she spotted a large Deathclaw near the entrance to the settlement, doing nothing in particular but stretching its arms.

"Dios mio," Vargas muttered, spotting the creature.

'I told you so' felt too juvenile to say, but Johanna smirked at the pale face of her comrade. She didn't miss how Vargas gripped her gun tighter.

The others didn't look happy either.

"I've never been within twenty clicks of a Deathclaw before," the shorter twin admitted. She was really going to have to learn their first names.

"You don't want to be," Murdoch said flatly. Then addressing the pilot, he asked, "Are you serious, Jensen? We're about to land next to that thing?"

"The girl was right, it's tame," the pilot said, deploying the landing gear. "I come here on weekly trips, never seen it become aggressive."

"Right. Well, it only takes once. Be on your guard, men." Murdoch loaded a clip into his gun as he spoke, looking a little unsure.

Vargas, still looking pale, but determined jumped off the vertibird first, keeping her gun trained to the west where the Deathclaw was. The twins followed, then Murdoch. Johanna was last, and much more relaxed than the others. She saw no point in taking her gun out.

Some of the farmers in the field next to them looked at them in confusion, but one stood to greet them.

"Brotherhood?" He asked gently, wiping the swear from his brow.

Vargas snorted.

"What gave it away?"

The man frowned at her and Murdoch stepped forward.

"We're here for a supply pick up. Do your people have it ready?"

"I'm just a farmer," the man shook his head. "Nora will be the one to talk to about that."

"She's here?" Johanna blurted out, over whatever Murdoch had been going to say.

"She just returned today. As far as I know, she's in her house. It's-"

"We know where it is," Jo interrupted him, her mind reeling quickly.

Nora was supposed to be in the Glowing Sea with Danse, could that possibly mean he was there as well? Maybe they had just stopped at Sanctuary for a rest before returning to the Prydwen?

"Scribe Polowski," Murdoch said, clearing his throat to fill his voice with authority. "You'll lead us to Knight Barber."

"Yes. Sir."

She did not roll her eyes, but the thought crossed her mind. In her opinion, Murdoch was trying just a little too hard.

The walk was a short one, as they were able to land fairly close to the settlement, and to everyone's relief, they did not have to pass by the Deathclaw.

Jo remembered Nora's house well, as it was one of the only original buildings that had remained standing. Though the red paint was peeling, the door was sturdy when she knocked on it.

After a minute, no one had answered and Jo was about to knock again. Her fist met air and the door swung open from the inside.

There was Nora, looking noticably worse for the wear, as if she had missed out on several days of sleep. Her hair was uncombed, dirt was caked under her fingernails, and her usually pale skin was red with sunburn.

"Johanna," she cried out, drawing the girl into a hug. Jo was shocked into submission, though she wondered why Nora was treating her so kindly. They were hardly friends.

When she pulled away, Jo was startled to find tears in the other woman's eyes.

"You won't find him here," she whispered, lips trembling.

At a loss, Johanna stood stock still in front of the emotional woman. An image of Danse flashed across her mind, for who else could she be talking about?

"He's dead, isn't he?" She deadpanned. A sob tore out of Nora's throat and she threw her arms around Johanna once more.

"You don't know," Nora cried, soaking her shoulder in tears. "He's been kicked out of the Brotherhood."

Johanna had never felt more conflicted in her life.

What Nora was telling her made no sense, or it made perfect sense.

It would explain why Arthur had to leave the Prydwen on an assignment that he couldn't tell her about. He wouldn't have wanted her to worry about Danse.

But what possible reason could the Elder have to get rid of such a model soldier?

Nora either couldn't, or wouldn't, tell Johanna anymore. With the small squad of Brotherhood soldiers standing behind her, Jo thought it was the latter. The woman continued to cry on Johanna's shoulder, muttering things like 'my fault' and 'the Elder knows', but not much of her ramblings made sense.

"Knight Barber," Murdoch interjected, quieting Nora's tears, and for once Jo was glad that the man was her leader. "What are you talking about?"

"I shouldn't have said anything," she gasped with wide eyes. "Please, I forgot myself…"

"But-"

"Please. Just take your supplies and go."

There was a tense moment where Jo was sure Murdoch would argue, but he simply nodded to his squad and made a signal with his hand for them to move out.

Brotherhood was always about the mission, first and foremost, and right now the mission did not include an uncooperative, sobbing woman.

Lingering behind the group, Jo grabbed Nora by the wrist before she could disappear back into her house.

"Tell me," she whispered harshly. "Tell me why."

"Don't trust Maxson," she whispered back, drying her tears with her sleeve. "He's going to kill Danse for being what he is. You can't trust him."

The words felt like a blow to the gut.

"What aren't you telling me?"

"He's a synth, Danse is a synth."

A snyth. She racked her brains for the familiar word and didn't have to try long to come up with the meaning.

Synthetic humanoids had been described in detail on the holodisk she had begun to decode for the Brotherhood.

But it was entirely impossible for Danse to be a robot, Jo thought, tightening her grip around Nora's wrist.

"How do you know that word?" She asked in hushed tones. Her work on the holodisk had been top secret and she had never heard anyone talk about synths, even with the way the Brotherhood gossiped.

"I've been there, inside the Institute."

That was entirely impossible, she wanted to argue. The Institute didn't exist. It couldn't. But there was nothing but sheer honesty in the other woman's eyes.

"Where's Danse?" She asked instead. The look that flashed across Nora's face told Jo that the answer she would receive was a lie.

"I don't know."

"Let's go, Polowski," Murdoch called, irritation in his voice.

Nora gave her one last pleading look before shutting the door in Johanna's face.