James spent the next day drifting in and out of a painful consciousness. Whenever he woke up, it was to the sight of Sirius sitting a grim vigil by his bedside, and to the sound of Lily's hushed voice as she helped Cait around the infirmary. By the time the light coming through the infirmary's small window had started to dim, James woke to hear Cait finally sending Lily to bed.

"I'm a terrible healer," Cait muttered. "Letting my patient work for me all day."

"I was happy to help."

"Bed!"

Stifling a yawn, Lily moved to the cot across from James. He fell asleep again to the sound of her breathing. Even though he was in pain, his last thought was a comforting one: James was in a strange time, but at least he wasn't alone. Whatever dangers they would face, they could get through them together.

By the next day, his optimism had started to fade. He was awake for longer, which meant he was aware of how much pain he was in, even with the pain numbing potion Cait had given him. Besides that, he was bloody bored, especially since Cait had roped Sirius into helping her with various tasks. He and Lily were left alone, which was something he normally would have welcomed. But as Lily worked at her potions, she was quiet.

This was the sickest James could remember being. He had been in the hospital wing for quidditch injuries before, but those visits had been short, and his friends had made them feel even shorter. Against his will, his thoughts drifted to his parents, to how it must have felt to die in an infirmary. James hadn't been allowed to visit them, because Dragon Pox was too contagious, but he had imagined their deaths more times than he could count. The thought of them dying alone in hospital beds had haunted both dreams and waking moments. When he had been sick as a child, his mother used to read to him. James had begged the healers to be allowed in with his parents when they took a turn for the worst; he'd wanted to say goodbye, but he had also thought of reading to them, to fill the silence and make them feel less alone, just as his mother had done for him.

He knew they had died in silence, except perhaps for their laboured breaths as they shuddered to a stop. He had never asked, but he had always wondered who had died first. They'd been in the same room… who had been the one to hear the other go? Had they been aware enough in their illness to realize what the silence from the other parent had meant?

The silence no longer felt boring. Now it was oppressive.

"Lily?" James said, trying to sound casual and failing.

She appeared at his side. "Yes? Are you alright?"

"Yes. I just have a question for you."

She was watching him with concern in her green eyes.

"Okay?"

He hesitated. He always had things he wanted to ask her, but the only questions coming to mind at the moment were too personal. Did she also imagine her parents dying? How, when she had just lost her parents, was she able to function? He had stayed in bed for days after his had died, and only the combined efforts of Sirius, Remus, and Peter had finally enticed him into getting up.

She was waiting patiently, and he finally panicked and asked her, "Could you tell me something?"

"What?"

"Anything you'd like."

She raised her eyebrows. "You'll have to be a bit more specific than that, James."

"Tell me something about you."

She ducked her head and brushed a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Like what?"

"Anything."

"Well, I hate lilies."

"No."

"Yes. I think they're an ugly flower."

Her eyes were sparkling in a way that made James wonder if she was teasing him.

"Really."

"Yes."

"So what sort of flowers do you like?" he asked.

"Sunflowers." She smiled at him. "What about you?"

"Well, I've always been rather fond of lilies."

He worried briefly that he might have gone too far, but then a pink tinge came to her cheeks, and he felt a mingled disbelief and satisfaction; had he actually just made Lily Evans blush?

Suddenly, Lily gasped and rushed back towards the cauldrons. "Oh no… I forgot about my potion…"

He was certain he had scared her away, but within minutes she was back, sitting across from him.

"My sister loves petunias," she said.

James was not surprised. "You and your sister are so different. That must have been interesting when you were growing up."

"Oh, it was," Lily said. She sounded a bit sad, but then her face lit up. "When we were young, before Petunia knew I was a…" she trailed off, "I mean, before I went off to Hogwarts… we used to play princesses, and Petunia always made me be the dragon, or the troll, or the prince, or the evil witch… some sort of villain, usually."

James laughed. "You, Evans, are the furthest thing from a villain or a troll."

"I think I did quite well at them, actually," Lily said. "I have a great evil laugh."

"I'd like to hear that."

"Never."

"Come on."

"I would have to be very drunk to show you," she said.

If they had been in 1978, this was the moment, James thought, that he would have asked her out for drinks. As it was, he wasn't sure about the pub situation in 1743 Scotland.

"Was it lonely, growing up without siblings?" she asked.

"Maybe a little," James said. "But my parents were amazing. And then Sirius moved in with us, and it was like getting a brother."

"Right," Lily said. "I forgot that he lived with you. It must have been very hard for him as well, when…"

"Yes," James said. "It was. It is."

Lily hesitated. "James… I'm sorry about your parents. It must have been so hard, and I meant to send you a note, but I didn't know what to say… and I'm sorry."

"Thank you." James was quiet for a moment. "They were good people. I wish you could have met them."

"Me too." She sounded sincere, James thought.

"I think you would have gotten along," he said. "My father was obsessed with potions. I don't think he ever quite got over the disappointment of my disinterest in them."

James gave her a slightly pained smile.

"Wasn't he proud of you for your other accomplishments, though?" Lily asked.

"Oh, yeah," James said with a shrug. "I mean, I was head boy. I did fine in all my classes. I think he would have liked me to get in trouble less, though, and he would have liked me to be more interested in potions." He paused. "Your parents seemed to be very proud of you."

Lily grimaced.

"Really," James said. "I'd only just met them and it was obvious."

"I know," Lily said. Her bottom lip started to tremble. "I wish…"

She shook her head. James didn't press her, but she continued nonetheless.

"I wish I'd been more proud of them."

"I'm sorry, Lily. I shouldn't have brought it up…"

"No, it's fine."

She looked up, blinking back tears.

"We'll change things," James said. "We'll get them back."

She nodded. "Yes."

After a moment of hesitation, James got up his courage. He reached out, bridging the distance between them, and found her hand with his. She didn't pull away.

There were so many things James wanted to say to her, but Lily had said she needed quiet to concentrate, and so he bit his tongue and watched her work. As she stirred her potion, her wand tucked behind her ear, James let his mind drift into the realm of fantasy. This moment felt strangely domestic, and he allowed himself to dream of a world in which Lily was working on potions in a home that they had built together. But it was a foolish thought, so he pulled himself back to reality and let himself enjoy the moment for what it was.

She was dressed all in brown today, her red hair tied back as she worked. Her arm was finally out of its sling, and so she was able to use both her hands, although she occasionally rubbed her left arm, which made James think it still bothered her a bit.

He still felt like shit, but at least he was well enough to move around now. Soon, he would move out of the infirmary, a thought that left him a bit sad. He had spent more time with Lily in the past week than he could have dared hope for, all because she worked in here while he was too ill to leave.

Now, he sat straddling a chair, his elbows rested on the chair back as he waited for her to finish her potion. Today, he felt clean for the first time since he had left 1978, now that he'd finally been able to manage bathing. There was a cleanliness to the day, too. The window was open to let out potion fumes, and so the heavy rain was audible, a soothing sound, especially mingled with the crackling of the fireplace. He wasn't sure that the fumes were really leaving through the window, though, because he felt a bit light-headed. Either that, or he was still more ill than he thought.

He ran a hand through his still damp hair and shifted experimentally. Just as every other time he had tried, he felt the scabs on his back pull, a sensation not so much painful as unpleasant. His white shirt was loose, so it didn't bother his back too much. It was nice, he reminded himself, to be able to move and to wear shirts again. Still, it was hard not to feel a bit sick of being an invalid.

"Done," Lily said, turning around with a bright smile.

It was nice to see her smiling. Too often this week, James had seen her expression shift to one that was unbearably sad. He had made it a goal, then, to make her smile as often as possible. He had accumulated a growing mental list of things that made Lily happy: making a successful potion was one of them. He admired her for it. Despite his family's success with potions, his skills in that area couldn't compare to hers.

"Are you okay? You're quite pale," she said. "Should you lie down?"

"I'm fine."

She frowned. "Should you really be coming to the dinner tonight? If you're not well enough, I'm sure the Fergusons will understand."

Now that both Lily and James were on the mend, the Fergusons had insisted on hosting a welcome dinner for their three guests.

"No, I can go," James assures her, offering her what he hoped was a winning grin.

She just raised her eyebrows, and James thought, not for the first time, that he desperately wanted to kiss her.

"What?" she asked. "You look odd."

James opened his mouth, determined to finally tell her that he liked her very much. Instead, what came out was, "Why were you friends with Snape?"

It was a touchy subject that he had always avoided bringing up, knowing that it would only lead to an argument. He wasn't sure why he asked now. Perhaps, after the week they'd had, and after the new closeness that has developed between them, he thought it was finally something they could discuss. When her expression became guarded, he realized he may have made a terrible mistake.

"Why do you ask?" she said, playing with the hem of her sleeve.

"Because he's horrible," James said. "He hates muggles… I don't see how-"

"We grew up in the same neighbourhood. He was the one to tell me I was a witch," she said.

"Oh."

"I didn't realize his views until much later. Or maybe I did, but… I guess I didn't want to see it."

"Do you have feelings for him?" James asked.

Now, he was sure he'd gone too far, because Lily's expression darkened. But then she let out a breath, and met his gaze.

"Not that it's any of your business, but no. I'll always have some fondness for him, I suppose, because he introduced me to the wizarding world. Just because someone's no longer your friend doesn't mean you stop caring about them… but at the same time, I could never have feelings for someone who hates such a big part of who I am."

"I love it, you know," James said.

Lily looked startled, but he pressed on.

"It's amazing. You can navigate these two different worlds so easily. It's admirable."

"I'm not sure that's true," Lily said. "I'm part of both, but at the same time, I don't really belong to either."

James frowned. "You're a witch. That means you belong in the wizarding world."

"Not everyone would agree."

"Well, screw them."

Lily laughed in surprise.

"If we're asking each other burning questions, I have one for you," she asked after a moment. "Why did you follow me through the stones?"

James hesitated, but settled on telling her the truth. He began to speak, and that was when Sirius walked through the door.

"I am so bloody sick of following Cait around," he said, as though continuing a conversation they had already started. He threw himself down on a chair next to James.

Lily frowned at him. "Why? She's a lovely person."

"She doesn't need someone to help protect her," Sirius complained. "I need someone to protect me from boredom."

"It's not interesting to visit villages in the area?" Lily asked incredulously.

Sirius gave her a look of derision.

"No, Evans, it's not. Cait does some of her terrible healing magic. I wait. We leave."

"Her healing magic isn't terrible," Lily said. "I'm sure it's perfectly respectable for the era."

"I tell you she doesn't need protection. There's no one dangerous around, and-"

"Maybe she likes spending time with you. Although I can't imagine why," she said with a teasing smile.

"Speaking of spending time with Cait, she's looking for you. Wants to get you both ready for the party tonight."

Lily sighed. Her gaze drifted back to her potions, and then she shrugged.

"Well, I'll see you two later then."

She glanced at James and offered him a small smile. As he watched her leave, he could feel himself grinning like an idiot.

Sirius sighed heavily. "I suppose we should get ready too."

James got to his feet, wincing a bit.

"How are you feeling?" Sirius asked.

"Fine," James said cheerfully. "You know, I think I'm really getting somewhere with Lily."

Something crossed Sirius's face, an expression James couldn't quite name.

"You've been spending a lot of time together," Sirius said cautiously.

"I know! Isn't it great?"

James glanced in the room's small mirror. His hair, as usual, was sticking up every which way. He ran an anxious hand through it, but he quickly gave it up as a lost cause.

He wasn't used to his new reflection. The bruises on his face had faded, but Cait had told him that she was not good at mending broken noses, and so James's nose was now crooked.

"We've been talking about so many things," James said, eyeing his nose critically. "I've been learning so much about her."

Sirius let out a half-hearted noise of agreement.

"What's the matter?" James finally asked.

Sirius had joined him at the mirror, and was now attempting to tie his hair back.

"Nothing," Sirius said dismissively. "Bloody hair ribbon…"

A wave of dizziness washed over James, and he swayed, before moving to sit down again.
"Whoa…" Sirius hovered over him anxiously.

"I'm fine," James said.

Sirius looked conflicted.

"What?"

"James, I think we need to go back to 1978."

"No."

"You're hurt. You need a proper healer."

"No, I'm not leaving Lily."

Sirius groaned. "Prongs. A girl isn't worth this."

"She is. I love her."

It was the first time James had said the words aloud, but they slipped easily off his tongue, as if he had been waiting to say them.

"I love her," he said again.

Sirius pressed his lips together. "And what if she doesn't love you back?"

"I think she might at least like me," James said. "Just… the way we've been talking, I really think that-"

"She told me she doesn't have feelings for you," Sirius said suddenly.

There was a long silence.

"She told me when we were in that cell, while you were asleep," he said. "I didn't want to tell you… I'm sorry, mate."

James tried to hide the fact that he felt as if Sirius had just punched him in the gut.

"That's why I think we should go," Sirius added quietly. "You're just torturing yourself."

James swallowed hard. He turned away for a moment.

"Sorry. Something in my eye," James muttered.

Sirius was quiet as he waited.

"It doesn't matter," James said. He cleared his throat. "I said I'd stay and help her, and I will."

Sirius looked as though he might argue, but James stood and turned his back to him, rummaging in the trunk of clothes the Fergusons had given him.

Sirius looked through his own pile of clothes that he had brought with him, guilt twisting at his insides. It had been wrong to lie to James, but it was also wrong for James to be stuck here, strung along by a witch who took him for granted. James had been hurt badly trying to protect her, and in return, she had chosen Snape over him when she had insisted they leave James's torturer alive. Sirius would never forget that.

James didn't deserve to be here, and Sirius would stop at nothing until he was safe, even if it meant breaking James's heart.