A/N: Here is the next one. We only have 2 chapters and the Epilogue after that - I hope you will enjoy, let me know!

Chapter 5: Old friends

Snape had not been what Sirius had expected him to be. He had been expecting a lot of pushback, a lot of acidic words and insults… he guessed what he had expected, in the end, was the boy he remembered from school. The man, he noted, didn't have a lot in common with that boy from Sirius's memory. He was not much of a talker, for example, when teenage Snape had been quick and precise in cutting anyone to ribbons with his sharp tongue. This one didn't talk unless it was absolutely necessary, and it was mostly in a meek, nearly shy way that took Sirius by surprise every time. This new Snape obeyed Sirius' requests as if they were orders and never tried to talk back on anything.

Sirius didn't like that new submissive streak, not one bit. He could never be sure about what the other man was thinking and it was irritating him. Did he mostly agree with Sirius's way of managing his business? Did he disagree but chose to keep quiet? Did he care at all? Sirius was quite surprised to realize that he would have preferred more resistance from the git.

There was also the matter of Archie's divergent opinion about the new addition to the staff. To Sirius, Snape seemed like an obedient, mechanical employee: never making any waves and ridiculously efficient, particularly given the circumstances… but Sirius could even admit that he would have thought so regardless. However, Archie kept complaining about his new colleague. Was Snape being a jerk only when Sirius wasn't in the room? That didn't really match with Snape in Sirius' mind – he had never held back when it came to annoying Sirius or his friends after all – but, then again, the man had changed and Sirius couldn't really claim to know him anymore. Was Archie feeling threatened? It didn't make much sense as this was just a summer job for the teenager. Sirius couldn't shake the feeling that he was missing something. However, even if the man's presence did make him mostly uncomfortable, for a plethora of reasons, he couldn't fault Snape's work and, in light of his promise to Alastor, he was stuck with him for the time being.

After a week, Sirius could even admit that he was a little impressed. Snape had managed to come up with a new system to manage the inventory and the orders to the suppliers, all of it being linked with all the bookkeeping in one tidy bow. One system for everything, and a level of follow-up that bordered on unhealthy. Now, it wasn't fully in place yet, of course; a precise inventory of all that was already in stock and on the shop's selling shelves was needed first and that would take some time to achieve. But Snape had managed to implement his way of organization to all the new orders already, and that was quite a feat.

Archie had complained vehemently about being used for the full stock inventory, but Sirius had managed to remind the youth that he was there to help with anything that showed up and to convince him that this would ultimately make everyone's work easier. He remembered being young and eager, after all, and it amused Sirius greatly to see the teenager grumble that it wasn't fair.

While Sirius was willing to admit that Snape was a life-changer on the business side of things, that didn't mean that he had warmed up to the man being around the shop as often as he was and imposing his shadowy presence in a big part of Sirius's life, too big for Sirius's tastes anyway. Not only was the git painful to look at, he wasn't much of a pleasant colleague either and Sirius simply didn't appreciate his silent, gloomy company, nor the way he seemed to sometimes check out from a conversation half-way through, and then reply as if nothing had happened, it was simply weird and it made Sirius uncomfortable. And that was without even taking into account how annoying Lily had become, asking him about Severus every time they met, bombarding him with questions about the git, 'Was he doing ok?', 'Did he look happy?' and other such nonsense Sirius had no clue how to answer.

He didn't envy Archie for having to put up with him all day long in the back shop… couldn't be very fun. That was one thing that had not changed at all, at least: Severus Snape had never had a sense of humour after all.

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Severus became used to his commute from Alastor's place to the Leaky Cauldron's every day, and then the little walk to the shop. He always dressed with a big hood to hide his face and kept close to the walls while walking in Diagon Alley.

The first weeks had been a big shock to his system and he had felt exhausted all the time despite only working for his agreed-upon twenty hours a week. Alastor had wanted him to ask for a more gradual start but Severus had stubbornly refused to talk to Black about it. He powered through it with all the pigheadedness he was capable of – which was, of course, a lot of it.

He felt so inadequate, needing a break every hour to be able to keep functioning, and fighting against the stiffness in his right hand when accomplishing anything even remotely magical or manual in nature, that he lived in dread of being fired every hour.

Black wasn't letting anything of the sort show, if Severus was being fair, the man was being clinical and to the point when talking to his new employee, never showing any irritation or grievances with his work. Severus was nevertheless living in the constant contradictory Hell of being so exhausted that he wished only to be able to sleep for a week straight, while simultaneously being ready to give his last breath if necessary to not fail at anything else in his life.

His body seemed to gradually begin to adapt after six weeks or so. Severus started once again to be able to read a few pages at night before falling asleep around that time, and he progressively resumed his post-dinner talks with Alastor from then on.

Starting to see through the fog of exhaustion came with an annoying side effect, however. A cost named quite inconspicuously "Archie", and that was becoming a big pain in Severus' side. After his rude greeting that first day, the teenager didn't warm to Severus's presence at all. It cost Severus all his control to endure the young man's criticisms and borderline insults day after day. Nothing he did was good enough, nothing he suggested was ever met with approval and he even suspected the younger man of trying to have him fired. Oh, he never talked to Black about him in his presence, but Severus, sneaky as he could be, had caught him complaining behind his back a few times already. He didn't need to be a genius to extrapolate from there that it was a regular occurence.

Despite his growing irritation, his strategy stayed the same: not reacting, keeping his head low. He knew that the young man was only working at the shop until the end of August and, surely, he could be patient enough to wait it out.

It was three weeks before the "end of Archie" as Severus liked to refer to it in his mind, that he lost his calm for the first time. Archie had been on his back all week about the inventory work – having decided from the beginning that it was Severus's fault and a work way below his worth – and Severus was already well over it when, on Saturday afternoon and after quite a long week, the little shit pushed him roughly out of the way to reach for something on the table behind where Severus was seated.

"Hey, do you mind?" was Severus's startled reaction at being shoved like a ragdoll.

The young man was still trying to reach for something over Severus's head, looming over him in a menacing and oppressing way.

"Get out of the way, you monster, I don't have the luxury of a little break twenty times a day or to take it easy like you are, lounging at your desk all day!"

"Don't call me 'monster'," replied Severus, very coldly.

The word brought back too many pains and horrible memories, he needed it to stay in the past and be contained in his nightmares. Hearing it in daylight was unbearable.

"Or what? That's what you are, isn't it?"

Severus stood up in anger and pushed the other man away from him. He regretted getting physical at once when the teenager tripped over a box and fell on his arse, quite painfully it seemed. Severus having always been the luckiest bastard under the sun, Black chose that exact moment to enter the room in a half-run.

"Hey, I need more of those creepy dolls, the ones who — what the hell is going on here?"

The man had reached their little corner and was looking at the scene with a look of astonishment that could have been funny if it wasn't for Severus's current state of severe panic.

"It's him!" yelled Archie, getting up at once, "that useless monster you hired! He pushed me! My father will learn about this! Wait until he tells the Aurors –"

"– wait a minute lad, what are you going on about, Aurors?"

Black was looking at Severus while addressing his youngest colleague, as if he held the key to the teenager's frantic nonsense. Archie's voice raised in pitch, however, making Black look at him again.

"He pushed me, he's violent and should be in Azkaban!"

"Are you hurt?" asked Black, looking the teenager over and even casting a diagnostic spell anxiously.

"Didn't you hear what I said? He pushed me!"

Realizing Archie wasn't hurt at all, some of the anxious air about Black started to dissipate and he turned towards Severus again:

"Why did you push him, then, Snape?"

Surprised that his side of the story was going to be heard, Severus didn't even think about it before telling the truth:

"He called me 'monster.'"

"No I didn't!"

"Well," replied Black, not letting the teenager have a go at another rant, "yes you did. You did it in front of me just a minute ago, Archie."

That made Archie close his mouth at once.

In the end, they both had to endure a lecture about their behavior, Archie on being rude and calling other people names and proper behavior in a professional setting, and Severus on the use of violence to resolve interpersonal conflicts. It left Severus feeling like he, too, was a teenager. The bitterness of being lectured like a child stayed with him for days afterwards. But, as often in his life, it was but a microscopic affront on the long list of much bigger ones that had been thrown at him until then and, in the end, he had to let go of that one too.

Archie, however, became even more insufferable from there on and Severus was slowly working through his teeth just to keep from reacting in front of the little shit.

After that, Severus kept soldiering on as well as he was able and, despite still being welcome to the shop every day, he still couldn't shake the feeling that he was just short of being fired after every new incident, even when it was really mild.

One of those incidents stayed with him for weeks afterwards, and not because he had to endure an arrogant teenager as a reminder like with the one with Archie. It was a Wednesday and, since it was the Summer Holiday, the shop was as full as it could be with boisterous children. Wednesdays were Archie's days off and Severus had been enjoying his time alone in the back shop for a few hours when Black's voice called from the front shop.

"Archie, I need more dragons – the Hungarians ones – from the new line! Hurry up, I have several customers waiting!"

Black, being in the front shop for hours on end, separated from his employee, had obviously forgotten that Archie – who was always the one linking the back room with the shop when Black needed a hand – was not there. Severus felt his heart stop at the dilemma. What would make Black more angry? Him not helping out at the risk of losing customers, or him showing himself, even briefly, in the shop?

In the end, after having stayed frozen on the spot for a few minutes, the booming voice coming from the other room and asking him to hurry up again convinced him that doing nothing was not really an option.

Severus tried to carry as many of the little boxes as he could manage and, half hidden behind the towering boxes, went to the shop area to deliver them to his "boss".

The shop was full and the noise immediately made Severus's lingering headache worse. There were so many stimuli around that he felt disoriented at once. His right hand kept sliding dangerously and he had to summon all his focus to make the last steps to the counter, where Black was waiting, without letting all the boxes tumble to the floor.

"Ahh, here you are, lad! Come here, quick, I need to scan all the new boxes to be able to sell them through the register's spell afterwards!"

Still hidden behind the massive tower of toys, Severus tried to tell Black that he wasn't Archie, but there was so much noise that his muffled voice didn't reach the other man. When he finally reached the counter, he started to delicately transfer the base of the tower from his aching arms onto the polished surface of it. That's when it happened. A child's scream, piercing Severus's ears and ruining his concentration. He jerked so violently that all the boxes went down in a catastrophic mess.

Everything shushed unnaturally and Severus froze on the spot again, sensing all the eyes in the room on him at once, virtually stripping him. The silence didn't stay long, and soon, several cries surrounded him. Young children frightened and crying, some pointing their fingers at him, the low murmurs of the parents, staring at him, and that little word, "monster," sewing all the little pains together into a horrible blanket of despair under which Severus felt himself choking helplessly.

Not bothering to try to retrieve the banged-up boxes from the floor, he turned around and ran out towards the back room, going as far as crouching behind a tall shelf and hiding like a frightened child himself. He stayed there, trembling, possibly crying, suspended in misery.

Black found him an undetermined lapse of time later, still in the same position, still trembling, and his eye still closed, trying to ward off the world like a terrified little kid hiding under the bed.

Severus heard him approach cautiously, and then tried to jerk away at the touch of a warm hand on his shoulder, but he was trapped in a too-small space to be able to move an inch out of the way.

"Easy there, Snape," said Black, his voice a little shaky.

Severus didn't answer. He just focused on his breathing and tried to calm himself, to stop the hysteria. Black's hand remained on his shoulder the whole time, grounding him against his will.

When he felt ready, Severus just stood up, not taking the hand Black had extended to help him, and nodded once to the other man, feeling like he had to acknowledge him somehow, before going back to his desk.

Black didn't follow him.

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"Are you sure that's a good idea, Lil?" Asked James.

Lily could feel anger rising in her throat. Were they going to have that same argument again and over again for all eternity?

"James! I thought we were over this already? I don't care what Sirius thinks, I'm going, and that's final."

James held his hands up in appeasement, looking wary.

"Alright, don't get mad, you know I'm always on your side, love."

"Don't lie to me, James, you could be married to Sirius Orion Black and no one could see the difference."

That was definitely below the belt… but Lily didn't care. She had waited for too long already and James' stupid worries were not going to hold her back this time. She was not the fragile person who had crumbled down after the war anymore. She felt strong now and ready to face her guilt. She wanted to do the right thing and no one was going to stop her. Not Sirius. And certainly not James.

"That's not fair Lil. I just want you to be careful and… I just want what's best for you."

She sighed, melting a little despite herself. He was an idiot, but he was her idiot…

"I know that. But… who's thinking about what's best for Severus, have you thought about that? No one is, James, no one!"

"Alastor –"

"– he was MY best friend! I can't just keep my distance and do nothing! I've done it for too fucking long!" Lily sighed, trying to calm down a little before adding, "I need to see him, James, I do. Can't you see that?"

"I… I do… I'm just worried about you," James replied softly, anguish all over his pretty face.

"I know."

"I feel guilty too, you know…", he added thoughtfully, " I… I don't think he would like to see me, though," he concluded with one of his silly smiles.

Lily took his left hand in hers, enjoying his warmth.

"No he wouldn't, you silly man," Lily smiled in return, before asking, letting his hand go in the process, "you're not still jealous, are you?"

"Of course not!" James replied at once, making Lily's eyes narrow at the suspiciously quick answer.

"He was… is my friend. I shouldn't have abandoned him back then and I'm not going to allow it anymore. You will have to deal with it, and don't you dare interfere or, believe me, you will regret it."

She could hear how cold her voice was suddenly; she didn't care. They were adults now, she needed to make James realise that he was going to have to accept that this was a part of her, and he will also have to deal with his own issues related to Severus; it wasn't her problem.

"Lil," James pleaded, puppy eyes and all, "you know I regret how we… I treated him at school. We talked about it, I was wrong about him, I know that."

"That's settled then. I need to go now, I want to be back when Harry wakes up from his nap."

James looked at her, still worried, and then he nodded in defeat.

"Alright. Good luck then," he said, before mischief lit his eyes up and he added, "and please, I want to know every detail about how pissed off Sirius will be, deal?"

Lily laughed, oh she too was looking forward to that!

"Deal. Be ready to hear a lot about how annoying your official wife is from your mistress!"

"Lil!" exclaimed James, laughing so hard he was wheezing a little.

"Shhhh, you're going to wake Harry up!"

Lily Apparated to Diagon Alley and walked towards Sirius's shop briskly. She kept going through what she wanted to say to Severus in her head, and was so distracted by it that she found herself suddenly in front of the shop without being able to remember how she had ended up there.

Determined, she took a deep breath and pushed the door. Chaos greeted her inside. There were children running around, exhausted-looking parents yelling at their progeniture, and just a mess of toys and kids everywhere. A little shaken by the contrast compared to the relatively calm street outside, she searched around and quickly found a smiling Sirius, apparently busy chatting up some good-looking mother near the counter. Of course Sirius wouldn't be bothered by the noise… the whole room was full of such a Sirius-aligned energy, Lily couldn't help but shake her head fondly.

She walked towards her friend, pleased to see him despite the circumstances. It seemed to be mutual as Sirius suddenly saw her and gave her a smile capable of lighting up a dark cave as if it was daylight. The pretty blonde was immediately forgotten and Sirius came to meet Lily halfway, greeting her in a big hug, as always.

"Lil! What are you doing here? Something for my godson, maybe?"

He said "godson" in such a proud way that she couldn't help but shake her head again at him.

"Harry's fine, you already gifted him half the shop, he certainly doesn't need anything else!"

"You wound me!"

"And you're the silliest man I know, Sirius," she replied, tit for tat.

"Sillier than James?" he asked, clearly enjoying their little game.

"Yes, and it's not an easy feat, I know it from his wife, you know."

They both laughed then. Merlin, Sirius was one of the most irritating men she knew. Lily often wanted to strangle him for his incapacity to ever take anything seriously – like it was out of a sort of principle to get back at his parents for their naming of him – but it was impossible not to love him. He was warm and incredibly loyal and just a big lovable idiot all around.

"So, who are you shopping for, not James surely?" he asked, mischief all over his face, "I mean, I know my best mate is a bit of a man-child, but come on Lil, not to the point of needing toys from his wife!"

"Not those sorts of toys anyway –"

"– too much information!", he cried, making a big show of putting his pointing fingers in his ears and singing loudly to cover her voice.

She shook her head yet again, still laughing at him. After her laughing subsided a little, she waited for him to regroup before summoning some seriousness again. As funny and ridiculous as Sirius could be, she wasn't there for a laugh and she needed to get to the point now.

"Are you done?" she asked, her hands on her hips.

"I think so," he replied, still smiling stupidly, "so, what can I do for you, Madam Potter?"

"Is Severus there?"

That sobered Sirius up at once. She would have to remember it, it could be useful in the future when dealing with her silliest friend.

"Yeah, of course. Don't tell me you're here for him?"

"I told you I wanted to see him, Sirius, surely this doesn't come as a big surprise?" Lily said, matter-of-factly.

"Well, yes, you talked about it… but Lil, are you sure –"

" – for Merlin's sake! If anyone asks me if 'I'm sure' about it one more time, I swear I'm going to glue all your tongues to the roofs of your mouths and leave them that way for a decade!"

Sirius, probably sensing the coldness in her voice, took a step back. She looked him in the eyes then, and asked again:

"Where is he then?"

Sirius opened his mouth, then closed it again. An air of resignation fell over his face and he sighed before saying:

"In the back room. He usually works in the repairs area, at the desk there. You just have to walk through the room from the door and you will find him at the other side of it. Be careful, it can be a little dark in there when it's not lit all the way."

"Thank you."

Lily walked to the little door leading to the back shop without looking back once.

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Severus had been working for a few hours now and he desperately needed a break. He wanted to solve the stock issue he was currently working on first, however. There should have been seventeen Weird Sisters Dolls Sets in stock, as per the register, but Archie had only counted sixteen. Severus wanted to make sure that it was the teen's mistake before asking him to count them again… he knew he was going to pay for it if he had to ask and it was really a last resort strategy at this point.

He absentmindedly heard the door to the shop opening and then closing, it was usually Archie or Black and it didn't register on his mind as important at first. When he heard soft steps coming closer, however, he stopped working and frowned. That didn't sound like any of the two men he worked with. Severus looked behind from his sitting position. His chair was placed so he was showing his back to the room and it made him feel unsafe on occasions like this one. He hadn't thought he was allowed to rearrange the furniture, so he had forced himself to adapt, like he often did.

He could make out the silhouette of someone coming right towards him. It was a woman. Was she a customer? Was she lost?

"You can't be here, ma'am – " Severus started, before closing his mouth when the intruder came into view under the magical-neon light, "Lily?"

Severus' voice caught in his throat and he had to swallow a shocked noise, like a dying animal.

"Severus, is that you?" asked Lily, getting closer to him, seemingly following his broken voice.

It felt like forever and it felt like no time had passed at all, and suddenly Lily was there, in front of him, a sad smile he didn't recognize on her beautiful face.

Severus froze. He wanted to hide, he wanted to hug her, he wanted to run. His panic must have been obvious because Lily didn't hesitate, she took another step and put her hand on his arm, the gesture making Severus want to sob.

"Hey," she said softly, searching his face to capture his eye in hers, "I'm here, Severus, it's ok, I'm here now."

It was too much, Severus couldn't keep it together any longer. He dissolved into broken sobs and Lily caught him, wrapped him in warm and soft arms, and held him.

And it felt like being back home for the first time in years.

It took Severus some time to recover, he cried like he never had, even as a child. His own mother had never felt as warm, as soft as Lily felt. When the crying subsided, he kept his head hidden against her warmth, inhaling her scent, welcoming all the memories. It couldn't last forever however and finally, with a gigantic effort, Severus straightened up and looked at her face, feeling so very small. They were sitting on the floor now, he didn't even remember them going down. She was smiling and it nearly broke him again.

"I'm so sorry, Lily," the words sounded small, strangled, but Severus was glad they were finally out.

She hugged him again then, too tight but he didn't care.

"Me too. I'm so sorry Sev. We made a mess, didn't we?"

Sev. Severus felt the corners of his lips rise in a motion he had nearly forgotten.

Lily was forgiving him and he felt like the happiest man on the planet, even if he didn't think he deserved it. He didn't care, he wasn't a good man, he was going to take her forgiveness and not look back.

It took them some time to be able to talk; the emotions they were feeling were so intense, they just didn't translate into words. When they both felt a little more grounded, Severus got up and clumsily arranged two chairs for them to sit on more comfortably. It was very awkward, talking to each other after all this time, after so much had happened. Lily tried to ask about his health, he remained evasive, of course. She told him that she went to see him, at St. Mungo's, when he was not really there, when it seemed like he would never return, and Severus didn't know what to reply to that. She explained how bad she had felt, back then, how the period after the war, while he was sleeping as she put it, had been hard on everyone. How her marriage nearly didn't make it. How she nearly didn't make it. He listened, nodding now and then, noting the differences in her demeanour, the little lines around her eyes that weren't there in his memory, the way her joy was a little less bright, full of shadows, the way she seemed so much wiser, too.

She tried to make him talk too and it made him very uncomfortable. It wasn't how their relationship was supposed to be. He was the one listening and she should be the one talking his ear off, complaining about Petunia or her mum or Marlene McKinnon's latest boyfriend. Of course, she used to ask a million questions back then too, but not personal ones. It seemed that this new Lily, however, did that a lot.

He tried to remain evasive but couldn't always resist her smile, her eyes insisting that he told her everything about himself. He felt like he was under a spell and that, at least, felt very familiar.

Lily didn't seem to be bothered by his disfigurement either. Severus wondered if it was because she had visited him often during his stay in hospital? Maybe she had gotten used to it back then? It was a little weird to imagine her observing him while he was unaware, lying in bed, far away. Her demeanour now was very refreshing, however, and Severus felt like he was having a normal conversation for the first time in a long time. There was no quick look to his missing eye, no hastily disguised shock, nothing like that. It was only the lack of it all that made him realize how much his daily interactions had been affected by his appearance.

He shouldn't have felt so at ease, however, since Lily managed to shock him deeply twice more before leaving:

"You need to come to the cottage next time we do an Order dinner, Sev!"

"Absolutely not," he replied, horrified.

"But why not?"

"I don't need to see all these people. Besides, I'm sure they don't really want to see me either."

"You're being silly. What is it with you all today…"

"You all?"

"Men."

And she said it in such a way that Severus knew not to ask for any details.

"But Sev, you need to come to meet Harry at least?" she pleaded.

"Harry?"

"My son!"

"Oh."

Severus stared at her blankly. Surely she didn't mean that, right? Surely she could see, despite how unshaken she appeared herself, that he was no sight for a child? He would not know that day, however, as Sirius's voice came booming through the shop door, reminding him that he was in the middle of a work day. He was on his feet at once.

"Thank you, Lily, I…," he stopped mid-sentence, uncomfortable, not quite knowing what to say to her.

"I know," she replied, a knowing smile on her face, and then she got up too and she added, "I better go back anyway, Harry should already be up from his nap and I told James I would be back by now."

They hugged awkwardly before she left, leaving Severus feeling even more exhausted than before. He stood there, looking at her go away, feeling a kind of happiness that felt like being sad. Or maybe it was the other way around.