A/N: I don't even know what this is anymore. It's been sitting here for years and I found it as I was going through my old fics and stuff. I figured what the heck, I might as well just slap it up on here to remind people I'm not dead. I haven't posted much of anything in way too long but I have been working on stuff in the background. Mostly a rewrite of another fic I've posted, some original stuff, and some other little odds and ends. So here, enjoy this random bit of Gorillaz nonsense younger me thought up that I'm posting now, mostly unedited since I've finished it however long ago. I can't even remember.

Murdoc Niccals was a man known for a lot of things: sex, drugs, Gorillaz, bass playing, swearing, illegal activities, self-proclaimed genius, being drunk, being inexplicably brutal to one Stuart Pot, and much, much more. One of these things, though, has actually (for the most part) fallen into the background, almost into inexistence. Almost. Care to guess which one?

...

*Think real hard now* _

:p :]

Times up. It's drugs. While Murdoc was always one to occasionally turn his Winnebago into what could only be a smoke machine-usually with pot-and just as occasionally steal a pill or two from the singer, he'd been fairly clean when it came to hard-core drugs. Until recently, because being the man that he was he'd managed to land himself in a situation where this new thing to try just seemed like such a good idea. At least, it did... and it really almost was. He'd been keeping it from the rest of the band for some time now and hadn't wound up in the hospital from any adverse effects. So far, he had managed to stay in the clear. It wasn't until a very bad mix-up occurred that any real problems arose.

One evening, after he'd secretly come back from restocking his latest obsession, Murdoc snuck into the singer's room. While the other band members weren't necessarily allowed in his Winnebago, that didn't mean that they wouldn't one day come in there, either through snooping or because he would have to let them in (begrudgingly). So he thought it'd be smart to have somewhere clever to hide the drugs. A plastic pouch was pretty suspicious. They came in the form of pills, so naturally, one of 2D's pill bottles seemed like a great place to hide them. In the bassist's mind, it would be perfect. Sneak into 2D's room, find a mostly empty bottle he probably wouldn't miss-or notice-and replace the pills with the ones he wanted to hide before putting them somewhere in his lair. No one would ever know, even if they did come across the bottle. It would be staring them right in the face but they wouldn't care because they'd only see a label for painkillers and assume he just needed something to help nurse away his hangovers.

Murdoc had carried out his little scheme shortly before band practice. He thought it was absolutely brilliant and praised himself for his genius.

Ten minutes into practice, however, he learned that it wasn't quite as brilliant as he originally thought.

Russel and Noodle were both glaring at him while the remaining 2D spazzed out on the floor. The more he thought about it, the more he felt that the only real mistake he made here was telling the others part of the reason why 2D may have been acting the way he was. In hindsight though, he really should've seen it coming after he had to chase the singer out of his Winnebago.

"What?" Murdoc asked as nonchalantly as possible.

"What? WHAT?! I'll tell you what, man. Your dumbass is gonna fix this or you'll find my foot up it!" Russel's voice boomed in the studio, rising easily above 2D's whining, squawk-like sounds.

"How's it my fault?!" Murdoc couldn't see how he was to blame for this. "The dullard brought it upon himself. He shouldn't have been snooping in my Winnebago."

"You shouldn't have taken his pills!" Noodle thrust her finger at him so forcefully that he briefly thought she wanted to kill him with it. Before he could object she had taken off her guitar and knelt beside the panicked singer. "It's okay, Stu-san. You're okay." She tried to hold one of his hands but he snatched them away the second her fingertips brushed them. When he turned to look at her his eyes got even wider and he started shrieking.

"AHHHHH! There's a purple whaaaale! Get it away it's gonna eat me!" The bluenette suddenly tumbled himself away from Noodle, only stopping once he rolled into the wall. The guitarist would've laughed at the movement if she wasn't so concerned about just what exactly the singer had gotten into in Murdoc's lair to make him act like this.

Murdoc, unlike the others, was finding the whole thing extremely hilarious. He cackled like a madman as soon as 2D started to roll himself across the room to get away from the 'whale.'

Ten seconds after he hit the wall, the singer noticed a small ball of dust a few inches away from his face. He became silent for a few moments, just staring at it as though he expected it to move. Eventually he exhaled very sharply through his nose, which caused the dust ball to harmlessly tumble away. He started screaming in fear again.

"What do you got in that crap-shack of yours that's making him do this?" Russel asked angrily. Secretly, he was just as annoyed with the singer as he was Murdoc, because by now the man should have known better than to touch anything in that wheeled scrap-heap, let alone take it.

"For the record, they're not supposed to do that," Murdoc said pointedly.

"What's not supposed to do that?" The drummer crossed his arms.

"The pills. Are not. Supposed. To do. That." The bassist finished by jabbing his finger at the singer, who was once again flailing about on the floor in a fit of shrieks and whines.

Russel and Noodle both quirked a brow at 'pills.'

"What do you mean, pills?" Noodle asked dangerously.

It was at that point that Murdoc realized he'd made a colossal mistake.

"Murdoc-san, what pills are you talking about?"

"I thought you were clean, Muds. Now you're sayin' you got pills?"

"Um..." Murdoc took a tiny step back from his livid bandmates. "It's not like that," he said nervously.

"The fuck, Muds?! Look at him! I think he's yelling at an ant over there. What kinda shit you got in that thing, huh?!"

"He'll be fine! It'll wear off. Hopefully." Noodle yelled something in Japanese and despite the fact that he'd never bothered to learn it, he knew it wasn't at all nice. "I don't know what's making him do that, but it certainly can't be the same pills I have-don't have!" he amended. "Maybe faceache's finally lost it. Or maybe he's hit his limit on the painkillers. Just because he's being more retarded than usual doesn't mean it has to do with me."

"Murdoc-san, you said that you took an almost empty bottle of pills from 2D-san, correct?" Murdoc nodded. "Then, sometime after, you chased him out of your Winnebago."

"Of course I did. The little shit knows he's not supposed to be in there. He keeps sneaking in stealing cigs or beer. One of these days I'm gonna shoot him."

"And now he's acting like he's on drugs," she continued sharply. "Oh, wait..." She waited for the bassist's response while Russel cracked his knuckles.

"Okay, Okay! I took one of his mostly finished bottles because I needed something that wasn't suspicious-looking for the pills I got. I figured that if anyone ever found them, they'd see they were some of faceache's and ignore 'em. I get headaches too, y'know. I just didn't think the dullard would notice and come to get 'em back. I switched them right away so if he took any, they weren't what he thought they were." Russel face palmed.

"D takes, like, five of those things dry when he's only supposed to have one, and sometimes he drinks with 'em too. You know he downs those pills of his like candy and flips out when they're not within reach. If you knew he could still get into your Winnebago when you weren't looking then why'd you leave the pills somewhere obvious?"

"I didn't! They were hidden in a drawer, so he obviously had to look for them. It isn't like I would leave them in plain sight. It's not my fault the moron has a built-in drug radar. Maybe next time he'll keep his ass out, won't he?" He looked over at 2D, who had somewhat calmed down, only emitting quiet whimpers and clutching his head now.

"Forget it," Noodle huffed. "Let's just get him to a hospital." She made a move to help the singer up but Murdoc stopped her.

"You can't take him to a hospital," he said, blocking her path.

"And why not? It's obvious that whatever these pills are causing isn't pleasant. For all we know, they could be killing him. What if he overdosed?" She tried to shove the older man aside but he resisted and they ended up getting in a light scuffle. Eventually the girl had enough and roughly knocked him onto his rear.

"Noodle-!"

"Enough! We're getting him help and that's that! I'm not going to stand here and let poor Toochi suffer because you don't want anyone finding out about your stupid drugs!" She shot Murdoc a vile glare from underneath her bangs before going over to the distressed singer. The bassist merely sat there in shock, as did the drummer; Noodle had never lashed out in such a way before.

"G-g-get away f-from me," 2D muttered on the floor as Noodle gingerly approached him.

"Toochi, it's me, Noodle. Relax, I'm going to help you feel better." Her voice was soft and she gently stroked the side of his face. She didn't want him to start panicking again.

"No... No, no, NO, NO, NO, NO!" he started shouting. "You're gonna kill me!" Before she could stop him, he got up and ran out of the studio in a frenzy. His shrieks echoed through every corridor of Kong. Noodle stared at the door for a moment before turning to glower at the bassist, who had just gotten up.

"When he gets better, Murdoc-san, I'm going to kill you." Murdoc gulped, worried if she'd actually keep her word.

"Listen, Noods, I know you're upset but... Y'know, killing me isn't really gonna fix this," he said nervously.

"I didn't say it would. Now, come help Russel and I find 2D before he hurts himself." She folded her arms and waited for him to comply. Russel's not-so-light shove was all the motivation he needed.

2D ran through Kong like something was hot on his heels. Every corridor was completely empty, but in his drugged mind he saw nothing but disfigured hands and pained faces emerging from the walls, trying to get him. The sounds of the studio's usual residents weren't helping either. At least he lost that whale. But he kept getting this feeling... It was still after him, wasn't it? Every time he looked behind him he thought he saw a splash of water or the blur of a shadow, like a massive beast was chasing him. He didn't stop running until he reached a window. There weren't so many creatures here, the light must have warded them off. But the sun was setting, so it wouldn't last. He'd have to find somewhere safe before-

"2D?! Where are you?" The bluenette whirled around at the sound of a distorted voice calling his name, followed by another, fainter one that seemed to come from somewhere outside the window. Oh God, they knew his name! What if they knew where he was?!

"Hey! Answer me!" 2D saw black, wispy tendrils shoot around the corner that the voice had come from. They flew across the hall and straight toward him, some becoming razor-sharp along the way. He screamed and took off in the opposite direction.

"Answer me!" Murdoc yelled, his anger rising. Why did he have to help with the 2D hunt? The idiot would've been fine if Noodle hadn't-

"AAAAAHHHHHHH!" The bassist froze as the piercing scream reached his ears, followed by the sound of retreating footsteps.

"Oh, for the love of-COME BACK HERE, YOU DULLARD!" he roared before taking off after him. Who did he think he was, running away when he so clearly called for him? Drugs or no drugs, he was gonna give that man the beating of a lifetime for putting him through this.

2D didn't know where he was going. Awful creatures and laughter surrounded him at every turn and no matter how fast he ran, or how big of strides he took, he just couldn't outrun the heavy footsteps and shadows that were chasing him. As soon as he'd started running the being roared and began to relentlessly hunt him down. He was getting tired; his legs hurt, his lungs hurt, his head hurt. Why couldn't he escape this thing? What did it want with him? Why wouldn't it just leave him alone?!

The singer was running full tilt when his long legs suddenly tripped him up. He stumbled in an effort to regain his balance only to face plant on the filthy carpet. Hard. He blacked out for a moment and when he came to he discovered that what he was running from had finally caught up.

"You little... shit," Murdoc panted, trying to catch his breath. "I'm gonna tear your legs off... and beat you with 'em." If there was a picture for the word enraged, then this would be it. Hunched over, out of breath and eyes burning with an unnatural fury, the bassist waited for 2D's response. There was no way he would help him up.

2D turned to see a demon standing over him, panting and hunched over like it was ready to eat him whole. Its blazing red eye and sharp teeth were the features that frightened him most. He wanted to scream, but his chest was hurting too badly to so much as utter a squeak. It was angry, very angry. And it wanted to start ripping limbs off. Very slowly, the singer backed himself away on all fours while never losing eye contact. He thought that sudden movements would set it off and breaking eye contact would give it an opportunity to do something.

"The fuck are you doin'?" it growled in its horrid voice, black smoke pouring out its mouth. It had straightened itself up and was watching him with a bewildered look. He stopped where he was. "Hey, are you even listening to me? I know you're thick but you shouldn't be able to deflect sound waves off that empty shell of yours." The demon closed the distance with a few short strides and before he could react a tight grip secured itself around his left leg.

"NOOOO!" 2D shrieked. Fueled by panic he began thrashing about in an attempt to free himself. The grip on his leg tightened and he screamed in fear at the thought of the beast actually tearing it off.

"Argh! Will you knock it off, Tusspot?! Quit your struggling already!" Murdoc was trying his best to restrain the singer and get him under control but no matter what he tried the man would not stop. He eventually grew tired of fighting with him and decided that he'd just drag him through Kong until he found Russel, who'd have no problem at all. Grabbing his other leg, he started dragging 2D by the ankles down the hall. The terrified singer just kept screaming and dug his nails into the carpet in an effort to keep himself from moving.

Murdoc managed to get Stu a total of ten feet before he saw the nail marks in the carpet and stopped. "Oi! Don't ruin the floor, faceache! I'm only doin' this to you 'cause ya won't cooperate." The brief pause was all the singer needed. As soon as Murdoc stopped pulling, his grip loosened a little, and 2D yanked his legs out of his grasp. Before the bassist could recapture him he leapt to his feet and started running.

WHACK!

2D gasped and tumbled to the floor. Murdoc, smiling to himself, casually walked over to his sprawled body. Just as the singer started running, he'd noticed a very conveniently placed brick on the floor and lobbed it at him. He had missed his head but did manage to get it right between the shoulder blades. "Now, listen here, faceache," he started. "I'm not gonna put up with this anymore. You're gonna get your ass up and to a hospital with Noods and Russ. Or, y'know, you could just snap out of it now and save me the trouble," he added, hoping that it would actually happen.

2D didn't move a muscle. Maybe if the demon thought he was dead then it would leave him alone. Kind of like how bears were supposed to. He thought his plan was working until he received a small kick to the side and yelped before rolling over.

Murdoc started a bit when 2D responded to his kick. He was only checking to make sure he was still alive; he thought he might've killed the man. Once he met the singer's eyes, however, he worried he may not be too far off. What were once pure black orbs were now solid white and wide as dinner plates. Despite 2D having no visible pupils, he could still tell that his eyes were darting around wildly, frightened of everything they saw. It was then that Murdoc realized the singer was just going through one bad trip. He almost felt a little sorry about before.

"Uh... Hey, mate. No hard feelings, yeah? I wasn't tryin' to hurt you before. Just calm down, alright?" His voice was as gentle as it could be (for him anyway) and he slowly knelt down in front of 2D in an effort to keep the younger man calm. "No, no, no," he said once the bluenette tried to crawl away again. "Just relax face-2D... Nothing you're seeing is real; it's all an illusion. You popped some of the wrong pills, is all." The bassist tried to give the most genuinely reassuring smile he could, but it only scared the already petrified 2D more.

"Get away!" he cried, kicking one long leg out in an effort to make him back off. His kick connected with Murdoc's jaw and the older man toppled backwards in surprise. Both of them froze. 2D thought he'd won until he saw the angered expression on his face when he got up.

Murdoc was livid. He felt a small pool of blood form on his lower lip before a trail of it made its way down his chin. Never breaking eye contact with the doped up singer, he let one lick from his serpentine tongue clear away the mess before slowly standing back up. "Your ass is gonna get it now," he snarled, taking one step towards him, ready to stomp his head into the floor.

"There you are!" Noodle shouted, conveniently coming to the singer's rescue (much to Murdoc's chagrin). She ran over to 2D and hugged him tightly, causing him to scream again. "No! It's okay, 2D! I'm here to help you." When he started thrashing she gently rubbed a hand up and down his back to soothe him. To both of their surprise it worked and eventually the singer fell asleep. Or passed out. It was difficult to tell. Murdoc and Noodle looked at each other before she tried to pick the unconscious man up. Although he was not heavy, his lanky form made it nearly impossible for her to carry him properly.

"A little help would be nice," the guitarist grumbled, once again having failed to move the singer.

Murdoc merely chuckled a bit before walking over, hefting 2D over his shoulders and then heading off in the direction of the car lot.

Noodle huffed at the bassist's lack of concern over 2D's dangling limbs but decided that it couldn't be helped.

"So... You're saying that you have no idea how any of these substances made it into this man's system?"

"Nope. Not at all. Unless someone did something." Russel glanced over at 2D, covered in blankets and sound asleep in his hospital bed.

The doctor gave the three visitors a suspicious glare over his clipboard while absently clicking a pen. They all wore matching sheepish grins and were standing together in the most innocent poses they could muster. He narrowed his eyes.

A loud sneeze from the man in question startled all four of them.

The singer sniffled a bit before passing back out.

Doctor Riley sighed. "Very well," he said. "I'll leave this mess for somebody else." He left the room and the remaining bandmates sighed in relief.

Noodle turned to Murdoc. "You will regret everything," she said, voice dripping with controlled fury. "When we get back to Kong, you'll wish Russel-san had been the one to punish you."

The bassist gulped. Despite her bangs, he could see the rage in her eyes and knew she meant it.

A/N: Don't worry. He's fine. Mostly. Although he might have some odd nightmares here and there of a very pissed off bassist chasing him.