I don't own Star Wars, Anakin, Padme or other characters
... and something in addition: English is not my native language, please have mercy on me.
Please read, follow, favorite and review.
I am glad to read your reviews, that makes me continue writing.
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A / N : All charecters, names, actions and processes in this story are fictitious and have nothing to do with reality. Should there be a resemblance, it is pure coincidence.
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This is a modern AU story about Padmé's and Anakin's life, their love, their break, their suffering. It is a story without happy end, so if you don't like this possibility, don't read.
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After Your Love
Anakin Skywalker was born in Montreal in 1982. His father was Canadian, his mother was American. Parents moved to Toronto when he was a little boy, mama's darling, so he grew up and went to school there. He graduated from Union High School. He never got to college, the paths of his life led him elsewhere.
As a child he was very athletic, playing ice hockey, tennis and socker as well. He became a big fan of the Toronto Maple Leafs and Socker Team Blue Jays later. He was also interested in american football.
Even as a little child, he dreamed of becoming an actor. By chance he got a part in a commercial when he was eight years old and from then on the roles followed one another, first very small ones, then small ones and finally some which were important. By the time he was thirteen he had starring roles in several TV series in America. He was noticed when he played the starring role in the TV serial Upper Level. The film The Cottage by the Lake brought him positive reviews, so that the film industry took notice of him.
And then he got the role of his life, the role that would shape him, the role that would stamp him, the role that made him a superstar, the role without which he would never have met her, the love of his life, Padmé Amidala Naberrie.
The film which had to be made, was not just any film. Three episodes were planned, so as prequels to the trilogy which was came in cinemas thirty years earlier and was already considered cult film, the name of the trilogy was Galacic Wars. The director had also become known through the first three films, the whole world knew him, Luke Georginson. Preparations for the work on the first film were long in progress. The prequels should explain the history of the old films, why happened what was happened. Before the first film, which described the protagonist's childhood, was completed, director and producer Georginson had to find the right actor for the next two films. The role was very complex. The character was to portray over three films a frightened little boy, his development from angry youth to a hateful young man. There were over four hundred candidates for the coveted role, including some world famous actors like Leo Di Pompei, John Jack and some more. Anakin Skywalker outperformed them all. He was the right one, Luke Georginson was convinced of that. He should be right. Not only that he embodied the character of the protagonist well, he convinced with the incredible chemistry between him and the film partner Padmé Amidala Naberrie. He himself was convinced that, that was the decisive factor. Georginson, on the other hand, felt that his character suited the role, that there was something dark about him. The film story is about the forbidden love of two young people, the Knight Haryan Ision and Prime Minister Natne Lee Heartbeat, their tragic fate, and their progeny, twins Lion and Layla.
The love story continued behind the scenes, not forbidden but almost as tragical.
Padmé Amidala Naberrie was also in the film business from a young age. She was born the same year as Anakin, just two months later. She had her international breakthrough at the age of thirteen with the film Lou the Killer, alongside the well-known French film star Juan Peugeot. After that she acted in several international productions.
There was no casting for the role of Natne Lee Heartbeat, Georginson wanted Padmé Naberrie….and yes, she was there every time when casting for the role of the Knight took place. Many candidates were scheduled for one day, they should only exchange a few sentences with her. The way Anakin said the words...but I'm grown up...tugged at her heart, she saw him as a grown up. He was right for the role and for her. She looked at Luke Georginson, they smiled at each other, the decision was made.
Filming began in mid-year in Australia. The whole crew was staying in Bondi Beach Sydney. In the beginning, when he didn't dare to woo Padmé, he went to a pub with Ian McGray...to get courage. After a few hours he felt slightly drunk and decided to go back to hotel. Along the way he started goofing off and found the way into the water, fully clothed. It felt good and he dived into the waves. That was the magic of the ocean. Arrived at the hotel, with wet clothes, he crept quietly through the lobby. Padmé couldn't sleep and was sitting in a big leather chair.
"You shouldn't go into the water alone at night, the current could sweep you away. What can we do without you? We would have to find a replacement for you, but I don't think we would be able to do that."
She smiled. He smiled too and couldn't find the words for answer but found the courage to show her how he felt when the opportunity arose. And that's how it started, just like the love story of Haryan and Natne, shy at first, but then Anakin grew braver until they finally found the way in the bed of the hotel room where they were staying. They were very discreet, they didn't want to make it public, after all, that kind of romance was not welcomed on set. It was considered unprofessional. It was felt that it would affect the joint work. Padmé and Anakin thought the opposite was true. In the keen eye of the film viewer, one would agree with the two. There were those who claimed the opposite and they were louder.
On set they behaved in a nondescript and collegial manner, but in the evening, after having dinner with some other actors like Ian McGray, they had disappeared into his or her room. They made love all night long, couldn't get enough of each other. They were only nineteen years old. Padmé's only concern was not getting pregnant.
"Don't worry Padmé, there are condoms for that."
"I want to feel you naked inside me, Anakin."
She knew her cycle and only had to calculate the days. This was the love they imagined, heaven itself. There is always risk, so it happened once that she was late and almost freaked out. She didn't want to ruin her career or her studies, which she had started a year earlier at Harvard University.
Anakin comforted her, they stayed in bed for hours and cried together.
"Anakin, what do we do if I'm pregnant?"
"I don't know, Padme."
"We could get married..."
"Padmé, we're only nineteen."
"So you wouldn't marry me?"
"I didn't say that, it's just... we are too young."
...and during their conversation she got her period.
"Ankin, I'm bleeding. I am not pregnant."
"That's good, huh, I was really…..well, it's all OK. now."
She was happy and somehow sad at the same time, and above all she wasn't sure of his love anymore. She started to distance, emotional. She still slept with him, she loved him, she needed him. This time she didn't want to take any risks, she started to take the pill. It was a new product., the side effects were not known, but there were some.
At first she didn't notice anything, she was still drunk from his physical love. They made love several times in one night. He was big, according to his stature, he filled her completely. They were always trying something new. Taking her from behind, he massaged her breasts with both hands. She didn't have big breasts but they felt so good. He couldn't compare, she was his first as he was her first lover. They learned from each other.
"You feel so good, Anakin. Please take me a little harder." She whispered so many times.
He learned with her, fulfilled her every wish and she fulfilled his, he liked to get blow jobs and was particularly loud.
"Anakin, I think McGray has become suspicious."
"I don't care if he is. Better if Georginson doesn't see it."
"If you keep screaming like that, he will."
"I have to scream, I love you so much."
"Then I have to as well."
They always teased each other, it was good for both of them, the work was hard enough.
The next location was Tunisia. Then the love continued after the difficult day of shooting. They were both in good mood, which everyone noticed. Nobody said anything.
Some important scenes were filmed in a villa on Lago Maggiore. A scene in the grass where Haryan and Natne were rolling, was not meant to end particularly intimately. Georginson wanted it have to be a story as the epitome of love, without showing any exact love scene. This scene in the grass ended Padme and Anakin with kissing passionately. Anakin laughed and said to Georginson:
"Just so you've got it covered, in the case you change your mind about chastity."
Georginson was beginning to suspect something was going on between the two, the whole crew felt the electricity between them. During a kissing scene one morning, Anakin couldn't take it, he wanted to kiss Padme...over and over, the night before wasn't enough. That would have been the first real kissing scene in the film, the whole crew was excited. Anakin was not a well-known actor with love scene experience and Padmé was known to be very shy. Silence was announced on the set, Georginson himself was behind the camera. Anakin kissed Padmé, everyone thought it was better than expected, but then he broke the kiss, turned to face the camera, laughed and gave both thumbs up. So again. Anakin repeated the process. Scene killer, thought Georginson, the scene had to be make once again. After the third time, Georginson went to Anakin and said:
"OK. Anakin, cut the nonsense. You can't do that, otherwise we'll have to repeat the scene a hundred times."
"Exsactly."
Anakin replied cheekily. He wanted to kiss Padmé a hundred times more...at least...until the evening.
By the end of September, filming was complete and Padmé bade Anakin a tearful goodbye:
"Stay with me, Padme."
"I can't, my fall semester has started. I want to continue."
"You need to, do you need to?"
"No, but I'd rather be smart than famous."
"Fine, I will not hold you, I don't want you to feel obligated."
"Is this an end, Anakin?"
"Don't cry Padmé, we'll keep in touch."
He stayed in L.A., she flew to Boston. The first side effects of the pill she was taking, showed up. She got depressed, behaved like she never behaved, cried convulsively in the middle of class.
In the beginning he called often, then less and less, but he sent her the pictures and drawings he made for her. These hung all over her student room.
She was learning, didn't get in touch as often, he misunderstood. He was bussy with his next film projekt, Shards. In various magazines and on the internet she saw pictures of him...with various felow actress that showed something more than the professional relationship. One little Italian, an American, a Canadian… it was hard to accept the truth, that he had moved on. They kept in touch but it wasn't like it used to be. She never asked him about it.
Three years after they broke up indiscernible, filming on the third episode began again in Australia. Anakin ran into his friend Ian McGray again, who asked him if he was still with Padme. That was surprise, he didn't know what to answer, so he lied:
"We were not together."
"I wish I could lie that well." Smiled McGray.
There were a few more locations, but Padmé wasn't there. Key scenes were filmed in London in 2005. Then they met again. None of them wanted to take the first step, to help the feelings that were still there. Anakin thought she would understand from his kisses and touches that he still loved her. There were more such scenes in this third episode than in the previous one. He invested all he could in these scenes to make her realize that those were his real feelings. Every touch was more tender than the other one he gave her, every kiss was a real deep testimony of his love and begged for an answer.
On the last day of filming, she answered his kiss...in his hotel room.
"Stay with me Padmé, I love you. You have become so beautiful, you are a beautiful young woman now, the most beautiful woman I have ever seen."
"So as you, Anakin. The teenager I loved has become a real man. You invest a lot of time in your body, don't you?"
"I have to, this body is my capital. I'm an actor."
"Yes, a handsome, best-looking one, a true Adonis. A lot of women are vying for you and you don't let anyone get away, huh?"
"Padme, my flesh may be weak, but my heart will only you."
"When I wanted you, you didn't want me."
"We were nineteen, Padme."
"And now…twenty-three. Where is the difference? I graduated last year, but to be honest I miss acting. I have some projects and some coming up, I will focus on that."
"We can still stay together. I love you Padme."
"Anakin, you've been with a lot of women over the past few years, even when we were sort of dating, when I was in Boston. I can't trust you anymore."
She really wanted to put him to the test.
"Would you like to marry me, Anakin?"
"We don't have to get married… to stay together..."
"See, that's exactly what I meant, I'm good enough for your bed but not for marriage."
She got dressed and went to the door.
"But Padme...please stay."
"What is your next film...Plant Lady?" Maybe the beautiful Sina Mallar will help you to forget your lovesickness. Farewell." she cried and wispered: "I love you, Anakin."
"I heard that." He whispered that softly too.
She left, flew to L.A. to work on the next project, Revenge. The film should be a success again, cast of internationally known film stars. The only thing she didn't like, but had to do under the contract, was shave her hair. She didn't know how good she looked without hair too.
Anakin worked diligently on the set of Plant Lady, and sure enough, co-star Sina Mallar helped him to lick his wounds. A brief affair with her kept him from thinking so often about Padmé for a few months, but it wasn't just one, one or two other girls shortened his nights. He let himself go, smoked and drank and slept with women, mostly beautiful actresses and models. If Padmé wasn't there, then it wasn't matter who he was with. The yellow press did the rest, everyone knew the stunning Anakin Skywalker was in high demand, very comfortable in female company. He was voted Best Looking Actor by the press. Padme didn't need the press, she knew he was the most beautiful man on the planet.
Padme herself also worked and dated various men but was careful not to appear in public. Garsan Baral and Jad Down were the only ones with whom she provided photo material for paparazzi.
And then came the 2006 Cannes Film Festival, presentation of the third film of Galactic Wars. The whole world watched...and got to see something. Ian McGray wasn't there but Luke Georginson, half the crew and of course Padme Amidala Naberrie and Anakin Skywalker, the superstars.
Their reunion was an unexpected explosion of emotions. They only had eyes for each other and provided all paparazzi photo material for eternity. The most beautiful photos ever taken, went around the world. Each of them was a declaration of love.
His mother said to him later: You don't need to say anything about it, I see you love that woman. She seems to be the right one. She didn't know about their love story but she had that mother instinct and liked what she saw.
After the official part of the event, which didn't want to end, they went to his hotel room and celebrated their love.
"Too pity about the beautiful Dior suit, you look so good in it, but I'm going to rip this one off because I like you best naked."
"Is it so? I'll rip that beautiful dress off your body too, I can't wait to feel your body against mine. You're so beautiful, Padmé, even without your hair. Well, what we have to do because of our job…" he stroked her bald head.
"Yes, you have much more hair than me now, suits you. You've never looked better than today...love me Anakin."
She tangled her fingers in his long hair and pulled him down for a kiss. He lifted her in his arms and brought her to the bed. His tongue was in her mouth first and then his length was buried deep inside her, all night long.
In five years of their on-off relationship, they made passionate love every time, but this time their desire reached a level they didn't know that existed.
"I love you, Padmé, more than my life. Please stay with me, I can't live without you."
"I love you too, Anakin, but if you don't stay true to me this time, it's over ….forever."
"You know that I love you, only you."
If that would be enough for her, she wondered, probably not. She couldn't understand why Anakin couldn't remain faithful. Was his libido too high, or he had emotional problems. Suddenly she wasn't sure if he really loved her. She was determined to give him this last chance, just as she was determined to break up with him for good if he doesn't stay faithful this time. She just couldn't bear the shame of seeing and sharing him with other women, she would even be willing to suffer for the rest of her life because of breakup, if she doesn't find happiness with another man. What she didn't know, was, that he was dating several women at that time and told each of them he was single.
They both flew home, to L.A.
Influenced by Galactic Wars, she couldn't exactly name the number of roles offered as plentiful. She accepted an offer for a Sino-French production. The film should be called American Pie. Filming was in Nevada, Tennessee and California. She traveled a lot.
Anakin was on set in New York filming Anesthesia. Co-star was already known Jess White. The script contained many extended love scenes. And then it happened again, Anakin just couldn't keep his dick in his pants. Gossip leaked, as did the photos from the set.
Two days after Padmé found out, she was found on the floor of her hotel room. She had a nervous breakdown and was admitted to a private hospital. After a week she was better, just enough to end the last scene of the film, after which she went back into treatment.
His agent contacted him and told what happened. He called her over and over again. She couldn't be reached and he didn't know which clinic she was in. He tried every trick he knew to contact her agent, her friends...everyone, except her parents. He didn't dare to call. Now he knew he had screwed up, and knew he lost her forever. He started drinking again and chasing after women. Actresses young and old like Eve Longly were on the list, or beautiful models like Barrie de Sedo and Korina Korova and he made sure everyone saw it. Sometimes it all got to be too much for him, he would hole up with his family in Canada and try to ignore that terrible pain in his chest.
Padmé recovered very slowly, went to Europe, where she was born, made a film there. When she came back to L.A., she chose to live. No, she chose to defy. A number of men followed who meant nothing, not even what you could call an affair. She was only seen briefly with them; Rodney Santos, Jack Galard, Nice Bogie and much more, even Nad Redshied, son of the famous millionaire dynasty. No, she didn't need his millions, she had enough herself, all of them were just trophies...and jealous annoyance for Anakin.
Both often changed partners, it seemed like the two made a bet on whose dating list will be longer.
Anakin finally landed a role in a sci-fi thriller Vaulter , in 2008. That's when he met actress Riley Brenton. She was the woman he would spend ten years of his life with. He didn't fall in love with her, no, she reminded him, but only faintly, of Padmé. In fact, she was just a pale copy of her. But this woman fell in love with him, of course, he was the superstar and she was unknown. She later got roles in some films he produced. She made an effort to win him over, to get Padmé Naberrie out of his head. She succeeded in doing this partly and sometimes, but she could never drive Padmé out of his heart. Anakin figured if he finally settled down and started a family, he'd be able to forget Padme. After a year of dating, he proposed to Riley and they moved in together. Despite the initial attraction, the differences in mentality between the two became apparent soon. She was an alive and sociable woman who valued friends, while Anakin was more reclusive and not very social. He stressed that he didn't want to spend time with people he wasn't interested in. In truth, he didn't want to appear on the Hollywood scene because he was afraid of meeting Padmé. He was comfortable just being with his family in Canada, much to Riley's chagrin. His mother didn't like her, she liked Padmé, although she didn't know her in person.
The news of Anakin's engagement was like a stab to Padme's heart. Could it be that he has moved on, that he has forgotten her? She was the one who broke it off, what could she expect, he'll be mourning her all his life? She scolded herself, she had finally to get him out of her head, she made the decision long ago...but she couldn't drive him out of her heart, Anakin was firmly grown together with it. But she had to move on, she kept telling herself. She was already twenty-seven, when if not now, when does she will have children...if ever?...Children whose father Anakin won't be.
The year Anakin got engaged, Padmé accepted the role in a psychological thriller called Phoenix. She met on set a likeable choreographer from Belgium. He was in a relationship with a dancer at the time, but that didn't bother Padmé, she wanted another trophy, she wanted to demonstrate her power, show everyone that no man could resist her. The Belgian, named Brent Malapain, was four years older than her, dark-haired and had blue eyes. He might have been dark-haired, but he reminded her a little bit of Anakin, just a little bit. They started dating in 2010 and got engaged in 2011, she liked him...and she was pregnant. What she shared with him could hardly be called great love, but the relationship was ripe for marriage. She often wondered during this engagement year if she would be able to let this man into her heart, because there was already someone, there was still Anakin and it seemed he would never leave...maybe the child will be able to change it.
Her career peaked with the Oscar. Best Actress in the Movie Phoenix, what more could you ask for? She accepted the award while pregnant. She gave birth to a son who was named Aaron. A year later she married Brent Malapain. The marriage worked.
There was a krisis in Anakin's relationship. He bought a farm in Canada and spent increasing amounts of time there, sometimes for over half a year, and Riley stayed in LA. It couldn't work that way, but neither wanted to step down from their own standpoint. The engagement was broken and the wedding called off. He was single again.
Padmé felt mean to herself because she was happy about the news, because she didn't begrudge him the happiness with Riley, well she wasn't sure if he could be happy with this woman. She didn't doubt her own happiness...or was she deluding herself?
After some time, Anakin was back with Riley...and there was heartbreak for Padme again. She didn't want to love him, she wanted to break free, she had what she wanted and wanted to hold it.
Her career progressed, she was very productive, sometimes she made to three films a year. Anakin wasn't that productive, he was picky. He invested the money he earned from the films Galactic Wars and later well and was one of the richest actors in Hollywood.
After seven years of relationship with Riley, he became a father...and again Padmé felt the pangs of jealousy. She knew that wasn't fair, but she couldn't turn off her emotions that easily.
She worked hard and focused on her family. Her private life she kept away from the public eye.
She didn't want to think about whether she was happy or not, but deep down in her heart she knew she wasn't. Children bring happiness and joy, one child is not enough, she thought, and decided it is time to have a second baby. Six years after her son, her daughter Emily was born. She loved her children and was absorbed in the role of mother.
That same year, Anakin and his longtime girlfriend Riley announced their final breakup. Everything is known in Hollywood, so Padmé heard different versions of the reasons for the breakup. Riley's close friends said the real reason was their daily fights, they were just too different no matter how hard Riley tried in the relationship. But Padmé was sure that the main reason they broke up, was Anakin's infidelity. During the filming of Chinatown he must have gotten a little closer to his co-star Emy Rodgers. He just can't let it be, he can't remain faithful, he's not capable of relationships, or gets tired of relationships too quickly... Padmé didn't know it and actually, she should be glad not to be his wife. Still, she felt a wicked delight that he wasn't with Riley anymore. She felt sorry for his daughter, Cindarella. It's hard for a children when their parents aren't together, and seeing him suffer from not having his daughter with him, was a horrible thought. All parents love their children. She remembered how he said, as a new father, in an interview, that he was happy to have this little angel in his life. The script from Galactic Wars came to her mind: Are you an Angel? ...and in a fraction of a second her eyes filled with tears. Damn, she still loved him.
After his breakup with Riley, Anakin was not seen in public with any other woman. Couldn't he forget this woman or he wanted to show Padmè that he doesn't need relationships to be happy...maybe he still wanted to be with her. Padmé didn't know?
The years passed. She was busy making films, two or three a year; Destruction, Singer Girl, Astronaut and others, otherwise she devoted herself to the family. She was spotted on the red carpet, here and there, rather seldom. Even in her mature age, she was incredibly beautiful.
At the same time, Anakin also worked, made two films: Overkill and The Last One. He prepared great for the TV series Ewi-Tan Menoti, a spin of the character from the Galactica Wars films. The whole world is in turmoil, noone can't wait for the series to start. The films have long since achieved cult status, as has the Dark Knight character, and Anakin is immensely popular.
Padmé distanced herself from it because the reviews of episode two were so bad, she and Anakin were voted number one couple with no chemistry. Well, that's always the case when the opponents are louder than the supporters. If only they knew how great the chemistry was between them! Does not matter.
Thinking about it made her chest hurt again. She hasn't seen him for almost seventeen years. Time heals all wounds. For real?
February 13th, 2022, the event of the year: Superball! Cincinnati Bengals vs. L.A. Rams and in SoFi Stadium in L.A., unbelievable. Everyone must see it. Her husband and her son wanted to see the game, so she came along.
Almost everything of rank and name had to appear. Robin Lawn, Leon di Pompei, Eva Longly, Boncé, Jessie White, other well-known athletes and some well-known European actors. Many of them, especially the female stars, didn't follow the game at all, the main thing was to be seen. Padmé didn't count herself among them, but had to admit that she wasn't a big fan of foodball.
At half-time, while almost everyone was watching the show on the field, she went alone to the window on the other side of the large VIP-lounge and leaned against the floor-to-ceiling glass pane. She looked apsent down to parking lot.
"Nice to see you, Padme."
She turned around and could hardly breathe. Her throat and chest tightened and her heart sank into her stomach.
"Anakin?!... What... what are you doing here? You avoid such events, as far as I remember, this is L.A. and not the Canadian….outback."
Aha, so she wants war, she can have it, he thought.
"And we're in a stadium here, not on the red carpet...and why are you standing here alone, where is your...husband?"
Oh he fights back, it must be ended, she thought.
"So, what do you want, Anakin?"
"I haven't met you in almost seventeen years, I just saw you and wanted to say hello. Seventeen years Padmé, you left me and broke my heart."
"Oh Anakin, please! You broke my heart, don't you remember? I ended up in the hospital having a nervous breakdown, after you have with that...that, ugh…..on set. Damn Anakin, you always cheated on me, all along!"
"I have ever loved only you."
"That wasn't enough for me, Anakin."
He came next to her and pointed at the couple standing at the bar, not far from them.
"Look over there on the left, do you know who it is?"
"Yes, the actors of TV series Highlander, Samuel Handhan and his co-star Kathrin Balmore."
"Exactly. The two were in love and together, they broke up, he sought solace with other women and did not find it. Now he's alone again and she has thrown herself headlong into a loveless marriage and is expecting a child...just what you did."
"I didn't rush headlong into a loveless marriage, it took me a long time to forget you."
"And you did?"
"I've been happily married for ten years."
"Are you?"
"For sure."
"Don't fool yourself, Padme. You're not happy, he cheated on you with your nanny."
"Never! He's not Archie Blacknack or Bred Fleck."
"Isn't he? Every time I saw you with him on the red carpet on TV, you looked at him as long as he had his eyes only for cameras...really Padmé, are you happy with him? Please tell me!"
She said nothing, she didn't know what to answer if she didn't want to lie. After a few long seconds he nodded and said:
"I understand. Look at me, Padme, look into my eyes."
She could't hold back the tears, but she looked into his blue eyes and felt like twenty years ago.
"I love you Padmé, that will never change and I'm not giving up on us. Maybe it will take five, ten or fifteen years, but we will be together again, and even if this time is not enough …remember what according to the script Haryan said to Natne at the end: At the very latest in the Force we will be reunited, Natne. Until then, may the force be with you, my love."
He turned slowly to walk away from her.
"I love you, Anakin," she whispered after him.
"I heard that." He whispered too, so long a tear found its way down his face.
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Thank you for reading and stay true to me.
Regards from Germany