A/N: Cameron gets to know the Company a bit better.
Apparently, I had been wrong when I told Bilbo we were going to have fun. This entire week had been awful, with Thorin hardly giving us any breaks, except for when we had to sleep. And even then, you could be assigned night watch, which meant almost no sleep at all. I had been on it about two nights ago, and I'd been cold, tired, and scared, jumping at any odd sound that I heard. Being in the wilderness, it meant that a lot of sounds were odd, let alone the abnormally loud snores coming from Bombur. Also, the dwarves didn't seem too keen on others than their own kin travelling along. The first day hadn't been so bad, but it had gotten worse with every day that passed. They straight up ignored Bilbo, except for the dwarves who talked to me as well, consisting of the two princes, Bofur and Balin, who were very kind to the both of us. Still, none of them liked to tell us anything about Dwarven culture or anything having dwarves involved, honestly.
This resulted into me and Bilbo remaining near the end of the pack, having quiet conversations amongst ourselves. If they wanted to be stubborn and not include us, so be it. Most of the time, the Princes who I soon renamed Pranksters, due to the obvious, enjoyed pulling pranks on anyone in the company, especially Bilbo, or flirting shamelessly with me, until their uncle would call them to the front to scold them, ruining all the fun. Whenever I got the chance to talk to Bofur, who was heavily protected by his brothers, I did, and he amused me by bursting into song ever so often. But since his brothers consisted of a very scary Bifur with a freaking piece of an axe imbedded in his skull, and a very heavy Bombur who could simply kill me by sitting on top of me, I kept my distance. I hadn't expected the journey to be easy, but it was even more uncomfortable than I thought, and it even hurt me slightly that none of them tried to involve us to be more of a part of this so-called "company". And right now, I'm trying my best not to become angry at a particular dwarf.
"No." I state bluntly, giving Dori a deadly stare.
"But, Lass, your clothes..." He protests weakly, looking over to my clothes from the dress he was holding in his hands. With dress, I meant the ugliest, most shapeless brown sack I had ever seen before. I hadn't understood why he came up to me as the others were setting up camp, until he showed it to me.
"There's nothing bloody wrong with my clothes!" I exclaim, giving him an angry look.
"They're way too exposing, Lass! It just isn't proper for a lady!" Dori argues, seeming to push his fear for my anger aside. Did this dwarf really think he could pull this off the first time he actually said a word to me?!
"What?! This is not exposing at all!" I say in shock, glancing down at my tight fitting, brown trousers and V-neck white shirt.
"Yes it is! As I said, it isn't proper! Please, just wear this." Dori doesn't give up, holding the 'dress' up for me.
"I'd rather die!" I shout, giving him a look of disgust.
"Please, just change!" He argues, a pleading look in his eyes.
"She can wear something of mine? Your clothes don't look very comfortable for travel." Ori speaks up carefully, always trying to keep everyone happy. The little diplomat. He hadn't said much to me, always turning incredibly red whenever I caught him staring at me, but I had seen how he acted around the others whenever there was an argument. This was the first time he really had said something with me being involved. As badly as I didn't want to admit it though, Ori was right. My trousers chafed my legs, and the shirt wasn't very sweat proof.
"I've got some pants to spare too." Kili helps out with a smile.
"Maybe my boots fit her?" Bofur offers, motioning towards the boots he was wearing. "I brought another pair as well."
"I've got a belt for the lass." Dwalin grunts out, surprising me. When I turn to look at him, the intimidating look he gives me is enough for me to quickly look away.
"I have a coat left!" Bombur exclaims.
For a moment, Dori and I have a staring contest.
"I'm either wearing my clothes or theirs. No other option." I state seriously, crossing my arms in front of my chest. I really hoped I looked a bit like Dwalin when I did that, for that dwarf was terrifying. I only found Bifur more scary.
"Fine." He huffs, stepping away from me.
"I still need a shirt…" I mutter, looking at all the dwarves.
"Here." Thorin surprises me by tossing me a white shirt of his, I'm barely in time to catch it. Our eyes meet, and he nods shortly before walking away.
"Go get dressed! Can't wait to see how sexy you'll look." Kili says teasingly, making me roll my eyes. All the guys who offered help hand me over their stuff, and I leave to change in the bushes. It doesn't take me long to change and return to show the others.
"So, how do I look?" I say teasingly, leaning against the nearest tree to pose like a model. Everyone turns around at that, staring at me in surprise. Thorin's face is expressionless, an unreadable look in his eyes.
"How the hell does she look good in that?!" Bombur shouts in disbelief.
"Thanks, guys. Those pants would definitely be on my ankles if it weren't for Dwalin's belt, though." I say with a chuckle. I had to make a new hole through the belt to make it small enough for me so the pants wouldn't fall off, whereas the pant legs had been slightly too short, ending a bit above my ankles. Thorin's shirt reached my thighs, so I tucked it in the soft brown trousers from Kili. Bofur's dark brown boots were exactly the right size, and very soft around my feet and ankles. I had a feeling they were even better than my own shoes. Bombur's dark green coat was way too big, but not too heavy, so I had a feeling I could pull it off as a trench coat.
I take my time to thank each and every dwarf that gave me a piece of their clothing by pressing a kiss to their cheeks. Some of them, like Bombur, Ori and even Dwalin, blush at it, while the others, being Kili and Bofur, smirk at the gesture. Thorin merely looks at me, frowns, then walks away. I'm a bit hurt by it, I'll admit, but I shrug it off. Surprisingly enough, I ended up rather happy about this whole clothing issue.
When evening falls and the sun begins to go down, Thorin decides it's time to set up camp for the night. We find a place on top of a rock formation, a fire soon burning merrily. I'll admit that Bilbo and I feel a little bit out of place, as everyone seems to sense what their task is, bustling about the camp as we just sit there. After a while, everyone is now either sitting or already sleeping, Bilbo and I huddled together by the fire, since it was rather chilly at night. Suddenly, a howl breaks through the nightly silence, startling me and Bilbo.
"What was that?" Bilbo asks, sounding scared.
"Orcs." Fili says, trying to be as scary as possible. I know he's probably just joking, but it still strikes a nerve within me.
"Orcs?" Bilbo asks, Fili getting on all the right nerves, and I already dread what's coming next. Probably some scary story.
"Yes, orcs. They want to slice you open and then they eat you. There could be dozens of them out there." As Fili continues, Bilbo turns paler and paler, and I'm shifting on my spot, uneasy.
"You think that's funny?" Thorin snaps, giving his nephew a disapproving look. The boy quickly shuts up at it, and I'm surprised by how angry Thorin sounds. I mean, his nephews were known to play jokes on the others, so this shouldn't really bother him, right? My eyes follow him as he walks over to the edge of the rock we're on, looking around at the forests surrounding us.
"Don't mind him, fellas. Thorin has more cause than any other dwarf to hate orcs." Balin speaks up, approaching us. I wait with anticipation, curious as to what he has to say.
"After the dragon took the Lonely Mountain, King Thror tried to reclaim the ancient dwarf kingdom of Moria. But our enemy had got there first. Moria had been taken by legions of Orcs, led by the most vile of all their race: Azog the Defiler."
Dread fills my stomach as Balin begins to tell his story, and I scoot closer against Bilbo, my eyes on Thorin's back. Man, this story sounded like it wasn't going to end nice.
"The giant Gundabad orc had sworn to wipe out the line of Durin. He began by beheading the King."
I gasp softly at it, feeling tears well up in my eyes. Thorin's grandfather, beheaded? It made me sick. It doesn't really help that Balin's so good at storytelling that I can practically imagine the whole battle in my mind.
"Thrain, Thorin's father, was driven mad by grief. He went missing, taken prisoner or killed, we did not know. We were leaderless, in a minority, and death was upon us. That is when I saw him." Balin tells us, a proud smile appearing on his face as he turns to look at Thorin.
"A young Dwarf Prince, facing down The Pale Orc. He stood alone and had this terrible fall, his shield was swung away by the orc. His armor, nothing more than an oaken branch as a shield. Azog the Defiler learned that day that the line of Durin would not be so easily broken." Balin concludes, and when I look over at the boys, Fili and Kili have a look of awe in their eyes, for their Uncle.
"And what happened to Azog?" Bilbo asks.
"He died in the depths of the tunnels, like he deserved." Thorin says darkly, turning around to finally face us. I can only stare at him, how he's standing in the moonlight, like… like a true King. God, he's handsome. His nephews seem speechless for once, as are Bilbo and I.
"Get some sleep, children. You'll need it." Balin says, and I don't even have to energy to protest. I make my bedroll, next to Bilbo's, and crawl underneath my blankets, scooting a little closer to the fire. Soon enough, Bilbo's fast asleep, and judging by the snores that surround me, so are all the other dwarves. I, on the other hand, find it impossible to sleep, the story spooking around in my head. Poor Thorin. When I become too restless, I finally give up, and sit up. By doing so, I attract the attention from Thorin, who's now sitting at the edge of the rock, his blue eyes staring into mine. Then, he turns around, his back now towards me. After a moment of hesitation, I decide to get up. I carefully tip toe around the mass of sleeping dwarves, and successfully reach the other side of the camp without waking anyone. When I reach Thorin, he glances up at me, and I carefully sit down next to him, looking out at the forest underneath us.
"I'm sorry for what happened to you and your family." I say softly after a long silence, feeling him glance over at me.
"I don't want your pity." He mutters, making me glance back at him.
"I don't pity you. I just think it's very sad, and no one should have to go through that." I argue softly, locking eyes with his blue ones. His expression is blank, before he looks back ahead.
"I cut his hand off. Serves him right, the bastard. Death wasn't half what he deserved." Thorin mutters angrily.
"Is the story why they call you Thorin Oakenshield?" I ask him, and he blinks at it. It probably wasn't a question he heard often, considering every dwarf must know who he is. Finally, he nods at it.
"I thought it was just your last name, like with Humans." I admit, making him look at me.
"Do you have a last name?" He asks then, surprising me.
"Don't have one, no." I answer, and he seems surprised in return by that.
"I thought that was a common thing among humans?" He asks, his eyebrows being raised ever so slightly.
"It is. I just… I don't know." I mutter, hesitantly.
"You don't… know?" Thorin seems even more confused now. I pause for a moment, looking out over the woods beneath us. They seem endless, and the sky above us gives me the feeling that we're so little compared to the world around us.
"You don't have to tell me, you know." He says after a moment, and I realize I have been very quiet for some time. And I remain quiet for a little longer, until I finally find the words.
"My first memory is of me waking up in Bilbo's home. Apparently, Gandalf found me underneath a tree on the side of the road, unconscious, near Bree. He took me to Bilbo's. That was five years ago. Living with him in the Shire is the only thing I know, nothing from before that day. Gandalf says that I must've had an accident that caused me to lose all memories." I explain.
"I-I'm sorry, I had no idea…" Thorin apologizes awkwardly, and I turn to smile softly at him. I can see the pity in his blue eyes, which seem to catch the stars.
"Of course you didn't, you don't have to apologize." I assure him, relaxing my shoulders a bit.
"I've always wondered if I have a family out there somewhere, looking for me." I add after a moment.
"Why didn't you go looking for them?" He asks at that.
"Where would I start? I wouldn't even recognize them if I saw them. Also, Bilbo is my family now. He's been there for me since day one, I couldn't possible leave him." I explain, and he hums in understanding.
"Did you go looking for your father?" I ask him after a moment.
"I did, and then I met Gandalf in Bree. He told me that my father had passed away. Instead, he decided to help me get back my kingdom." Thorin says, emotion sounding through his voice. When it came to his family, his past, and his quest, he always seemed so passionate. Sometimes, I wished I had something or someone to feel such strong emotions for. Not that I would admit that to him out loud.
"I'm sorry." I say instead, and he sighs slowly.
"Don't be. I don't need pity, as I told you before." He states, the previous vulnerability suddenly gone.
"Guess we're both orphans then, in some way. No family, no home…" I muse, and he falls silent at that. I have to admit I'm startled by this thing we have in common. I wouldn't have expected him to understand this side of me, but I understood him perfectly. The silence is peaceful for a moment, both of us probably thinking about the new information.
"Can I sit with you until I get tired enough to catch some sleep?" I then ask, locking eyes with him. There's a strange look in his eyes, and I wonder what he's thinking.
"Alright." He gives in, and I spend the rest of his shift by his side, the both of us quiet, but a comfortable atmosphere surrounding us. When his shift's over, I finally feel tired, so I get back in my bed. I feel more at ease now, so I fall asleep without any difficulties.