Chapter 66
Climbing up the stairs towards Azula's room, Katara felt overcome with fear about the imminent confrontation with the girl she loved. She couldn't even logically explain to herself how and why they had brushed the issue of horses aside like that. Katara had been having nightmares about the horses for three weeks after receiving the letter, and she hadn't even seen the actual photo. As Katara was struggling to cope with what had happened, it had felt easy to justify keeping it from Azula, because if she and the other girls were suffering so badly, then for Azula the trauma would be magnified tenfold. Katara had seen Azula only a few weeks after she had endured attempted sexual assault at the hands of her father. That image of a pale, near catatonic, heavily sedated girl with sunken eyes was forever etched in Katara's memory. When Katara had thought about telling Azula the truth about the horses, her mind had immediately gone back to that memory of Azula at her absolute worst mentally, and she just hadn't been able to force herself to be honest, because she was too afraid of Azula having a severe setback that could put her back in the asylum.
Katara freely admitted that they should have handled the issue of horses much better than they had. She, Yue and Ty Lee had tried to cope with it by forcing themselves to forget what had happened, to erase that terrible letter from their memories. As Katara tried to do just that, she had struggled with the need to somehow make Azula aware of what had happened, but by then Azula's departure to Caldera City was only three weeks away, and she hadn't dared to risk Azula having a setback so close to meeting her father. And once Azula had departed for the Fire Nation, Katara and the girls had first and foremost freaked out about the possibility of Ozai kidnapping Azula, or spirits forbid, having her killed. In relation to those threats, the possibility of Ozai telling Azula about the horses had felt so insignificant that it had almost faded from their minds, because they had been so focused on the other, much scarier possibilities. But now they were in dire trouble for mishandling the issue of horses, and Katara knew that she had to try and make Azula understand why they had chosen to withhold the truth from her.
Katara knew that her task would not be easy. Because of her upbringing, Azula's capacity of trust was very limited. She expected the worst from other people, and as a result, opened up very slowly even to those she considered her friends. Azula probably trusted her the most, followed by Yue and then Ty Lee. Katara understood why the three most trusted people in Azula's life conspiring to keep the truth from her felt like such a painful betrayal. And there wasn't much that Katara could say to excuse what they had done, aside from providing the context for their actions and hopefully help Azula see the situation from their perspective.
Katara's shoulder still ached terribly as she made it all the way upstairs, but she could not think about that now, turning to knock on Azula's doors. There was no reply, so she moved to open the doors. Katara had managed to open them half way when Azula rushed towards her and began to close the doors shut. They ended up in a brief struggle, Katara leaning in with all of her body weight, refusing to budge even though her injured shoulder was killing her. Azula eventually gave in, allowing her to enter, and Katara did so closing the doors behind her. Azula stood in the middle of the room, looking angry and ready to fight.
"Azula, I confess that I don't know where to begin," Katara began to speak softly. "It wasn't supposed to happen this way."
"You mean, I wasn't supposed to find out that my horses were dead?" Azula asked in a shrill and cutting voice. "If my father hadn't told me, you would have just kept silent about it forever? Get out of my sight, Katara," she snarled angrily.
"No, I won't leave until you hear me out, Azula," Katara said firmly. "I understand why you're upset. I really do." Azula laughed incredulously. "When you discover that someone has been keeping the truth from you with the excuse of protecting you from something awful and possibly traumatic, well, it rarely feels good, does it? It tends to make you really angry, doesn't it?"
"If you know that, then why did you do it?" Azula snapped.
"Probably for similar reasons why you did it to me, Azula," Katara replied.
Azula's amber orbs narrowed at her. "What are you talking about?"
"When I broke into the Crystal Castles Sanatorium to check up on you, and you told me about everything that had happened with your father, it became very clear to me that you had downplayed the threat posed by your father for months, maybe even a year," Katara said, becoming emotional herself. "I suspected that you were not telling me everything. But then, when you told me the truth, I realized just how much you had been hiding from me. And let me tell you something, Azula. I thought that we were friends who told each other everything. To know that you had kept all that from me, that hurt. That really, really hurt. You didn't tell me about the knife. You even made Sokka swear not to tell me, his own sister! And yes, I'm aware that knowing how much you hurt me by withholding the truth, I shouldn't have responded the same way. I failed to find the best way forward with the news about your horses, and I'm sorry."
"You certainly failed with that. Besides, the issue with the knife was completely different," Azula argued. "You knowing the truth about Ozai could have literally gotten you killed! You should know that after what happened with Bato!"
"It's not that different," Katara insisted. "Try to imagine what learning about your beloved horses having been killed would have done to you less than a month before you were scheduled to go and face your father in the Fire Nation. And be honest with yourself."
"I would have been fine," Azula muttered stubbornly.
"Oh, you would have been fine?" Katara asked. "You would have been able to face your father and remain calm and rational as you presented your evidence and your demands to the man who had gunned down innocent animals you cared so much about? We both know that it would have been impossible for you to remain calm."
"That's what you think," Azula still tried to remain resolute, but Katara could see that the Fire Nation girl was starting to struggle to convince herself.
"Alright, fine, I won't continue to argue that point," Katara shrugged. "I want you to think back on that meeting in the asylum. As I said, I felt hurt and betrayed because you had not been truthful with me. But how did I react? Did I tear into you with angry accusations?"
"You didn't," Azula muttered. Her arms were crossed on her chest and she was glaring at the wall, refusing to meet Katara's eyes.
"Yes, because even though you had hurt me, I didn't want to hurt you in return, especially when you were vulnerable and in such a bad way," Katara continued. "I didn't even bring it up later, after you had started to get better. I suppose by then I had managed to see things from your perspective, and I understood why you made that decision not to tell me. Azula, I know that we did wrong by you and we should have never kept this information from you. I owe you a massive apology, Azula, I know that. All I'm asking is for you to look into your heart and try to see the decision we made from my, Yue and Ty Lee's perspective."
Azula remained silent, her lips tightly knit as she refused to reply. Still, Katara could see that her friend was wavering. "And I know that this must be especially painful coming from me, because I have always preached about trust, so I must be looking like the worst kind of hypocrite right now," Katara sighed, swallowing heavily as she began to tear up. "I'm not perfect, Azula. I'm going to make mistakes, too. People who truly care about each other still sometimes end up hurting one another, despite having only the best intentions. I broke your trust and I hurt you, and that's… that's hard to forgive, I know that." Katara began to cry softly. "But I love you, Azula. And I'm asking for another chance to prove that I can do better than this." Azula was still staring at the wall, refusing to answer. With tears streaming down her cheeks, Katara realized that she had done everything she could for now, and that trying to convince Azula further would only lead to irrational pushback. "I'm so sorry, Azula, I truly am," Katara managed in between sobs before turning around and leaving the room.
As she did so, Katara managed to catch the look Azula gave her as Katara was about to leave. Azula looked deeply conflicted and her amber eyes seemed to have a certain shine to them, as if Azula herself was on the verge of tears. Katara suddenly felt more hopeful about possibly having done enough as she climbed down the stairs to face the anxious and worried looking Yue and Ty Lee.
"How did it go?" Yue asked nervously, probably expecting the worst as she regarded Katara's tear stained face.
"Yeah, do we still need to leave?" Ty Lee added, looking tearful.
"I don't think so," Katara shook her head. "I left her deep in thought, but I could tell that she was starting to calm down. Let's give her half an hour at least, maybe a bit more."
"We fucked up about the horses, didn't we?" Yue asked forlornly as she stared at Katara.
"Majorly," Katara nodded. "What were we possibly thinking?"
"Didn't Azula's uncle also tell us to get rid of the photo?" Ty Lee asked.
"Sure, but let's not pin this on Uncle Iroh," Yue shook her head. "This was our bad, Ty. We disrespected Azula and we betrayed her trust. We should have found some way to let her know, but we were just too scared to tell her."
"Well, we had our reasons," Ty Lee shrugged. "Hard to think that Azula is ready for news like these when I can't even walk into her room unannounced, because if I do that, she immediately leaps under the bed to hide."
The three girls spent the next half an hour sitting around the kitchen table in silence, alert for any noises coming from the upstairs, but the estate stayed silent as Azula remained confined to her room. "Ugh, I can't stand this waiting anymore," Yue said. She gently rubbed her belly, grimacing. "My stomach is starting to hurt from all this stress."
"I don't feel so good either," Ty Lee sighed. "Maybe we should just go and speak with Azula, all three of us together. Let's get down on our knees and beg if that's what it takes."
"I don't think that's going to work, but maybe there's a way we can encourage her to make the right decision and allow us to stay and make it up to her," Yue said, a determined look in her eyes suggesting that she had come up with a bright idea. She motioned for Ty Lee and Katara to lean in as they pressed their heads together and started to whisper excitedly. "Here's what we should do…"
In light of her tense confrontation with Katara, Azula was busy fighting a seriously tough inner battle to hold on to the anger towards her three best friends. She still felt outraged and betrayed, but that was not everything she was feeling. Even as she had stormed into the estate to yell at Katara, Yue and Ty Lee, a part of her had been delighted to be back and see her friends whom she had missed so much during the two weeks of her absence. This part of her was already starting to look for excuses to make for her friends, and it reminded her of everything Katara had done for her when Azula was at the asylum, and everything Katara had done to help Azula find her footing during her fall from riches to rags. The part of Azula that urged her to forgive was also reminding her of everything that Yue had done since coming to Ba Sing Se to keep her and Katara on track for a romantic relationship. And it reminded Azula of everything that Ty Lee had been through during all those years spent out on the harsh streets of Ba Sing Se. Yes, she had been betrayed, and yes, it hurt worse than most of the beatings at her father's hand, but did she truly want these three girls out of her life?
Katara had asked Azula to consider their perspective. Azula's first instinct was to dismiss Katara's request, because surely nothing could excuse this kind of betrayal. But then, the words of both Zirin and Mai had come back to her. Both girls had told her that Katara, Yue and Ty Lee had probably just tried to protect her. Azula had always been conditioned to believe that needing to be protected by someone was a demeaning and insulting sign of weakness. Her first instinct would always be to claim that she didn't need any sort of coddling or protecting.
Except that the reality told a different story, much to Azula's annoyance. To her friends, her mental frailties must have still been obvious, as much as Azula hated to admit it. In the aftermath of her father's assault, she had survived only because people like Katara and Iroh had protected her. She had gone through all this painful experience of learning to ask for help and learning to accept it. Azula still wasn't comfortable with it. A part of her still believed that getting better meant becoming so emotionally strong and self-reliant that she wouldn't have to talk about her confusing emotions with anyone. But another part of her was coming around to accept Katara's persuasive argument that relying on others was a sign of strength, and that a deeper level of trust with her closest friends could be incredibly empowering.
Of course, the downside of it all was that trust could also become emotionally destructive when it was broken. This was happening to Azula now, and the choice before her was to either retreat to her old ways of thinking that trust was for the foolish and the weak, or to accept that trust was still a positive and empowering force, even if it carried with itself the risk of getting badly hurt.
Azula felt comfortable admitting that while she had most certainly made good progress in her therapy sessions, she still had a long road ahead of her. Katara and the other girls knew that perfectly well. As much as Azula hated to admit it, she still needed to be protected from certain things. With some reluctance, Azula also had to admit that she could see why the other girls had felt so certain that the news about the death of her horses would be deeply devastating for her. Especially if there had been pictures and she had seen them… Azula felt physically ill from that thought, and it filled her with so much anger and hatred towards Ozai that she felt ready to punch a wall.
Azula found the whole situation incredibly frustrating. She didn't want to let go of the conviction that Katara, Ty Lee and Yue had wronged her. But now that she had finally come around to realize why they had hidden the truth from her, Azula felt that some of her anger was starting to cool a little. And perhaps she had overreacted slightly when she had shoved Katara to the ground. Recalling the shocked and hurt look in Katara's eyes even further eroded Azula's determination to remain unforgiving. Still, this didn't answer the pending question that Azula now faced, and that was what to do next. She didn't want to go downstairs and act all forgiving as if nothing had happened, because she wasn't ready to forgive her friends, not yet. But she also didn't want to spend all this time cooped up in her room and seething pointlessly.
"Azula?" she jerked at the sound of Yue suddenly calling out her name. "Azula, will you at least come downstairs to say farewells?"
Azula froze in horror. What did Yue mean by that? Had they really taken her threats seriously? Had she at any point even meant what she had said? But how would the others know that she hadn't been serious? And now Katara, Yue and Ty Lee were going to leave the estate and leave her life because she had overreacted in her righteous anger. Azula realized then and there that she had to do something, anything to stop her three best friends from leaving.
As Azula arrived downstairs, she was confronted with a sight that made her stomach lurch and legs go week at the knees, causing her to stumble. Katara, Yue and Ty Lee were standing by the doors, holding their suitcases and looking very sad and tearful. Maybe once, when her heart had still been hardened by Ozai's cruel treatments, Azula would have been able to stand firm in the face of such a sight. But Azula was a different person now, for better, not worse, and her heart simply could not take it. She broke down, her shoulders shaking as she started to sob. "Please… please, don't leave…" she managed, the nervous hiccupping making it hard for her to speak.
"Are you asking us to stay, Azula?" Katara asked in a hopeful voice. "Are you giving us another chance?"
"Yes," she ground out, unable to stop the flood of tears. "I can't forgive you for what you did, not yet, but I also need you, okay? I don't know what… what I would do… without you," she finished, frantically wiping her cheeks with the back of her hand, more than likely making a huge mess.
"Yay!" Ty Lee exclaimed joyfully, tossing the suitcase aside and it opened to reveal that it had been completely empty the whole time. "Oops!" Ty Lee grinned and then rushed Azula like a thunderbolt before Azula could say anything. Within moments, Azula found herself smothered in a tight four-way hug, trying her hardest to stop crying but finding it impossible. These were tears of relief that her friends weren't leaving, however, and they didn't feel at all bad.
"I hate you so much, you sneaky bitches," Azula sobbed. She wondered if she should feel angry about them manipulating her feelings with this empty suitcase and fake leaving charade, but Azula felt too emotionally drained to summon any anger. Besides, a part of her appreciated her friends pulling off such a well orchestrated act.
"We just wanted to nudge you a little in the right direction," Yue said, together with the other two girls continuing to hold Azula. "But Zula, we all truly regret what we did. Believe us when we say that we have learned our lesson. The threat of not having you in our lives anymore felt devastating and I never want to risk my relationship with you again," Yue spoke earnestly.
"Yue speaks for us all," Katara whispered, leaning close to Azula's ear. "This will never repeat again, I swear. We're going to do whatever it takes to rebuild our broken trust, Azula, if only you give us a chance."
"I shouldn't, but I also feel like I don't have a choice," Azula managed. The tears had stopped by now, but the emotional high remained. The sense of relief was indescribable, forcing her to open up like never before. "I never want to feel this angry with you again. Please, never make me feel this way again, or then it will all be over. You're like… the best part of my life right now, alright? I can't have you idiots ruining that for me, okay?" she exclaimed, shaking with emotional overload. Being held like this made Azula feel safe and loved like never before, despite the damaged trust. It was stripping down all of her barriers and that both frightened and exhilarated her.
"You're so sweet, Zula," Ty Lee cooed. "You love us, don't you?"
"Of course, I love all three of you, you undeserving idiots," Azula laughed, fresh tears escaping across her cheeks.
"We love you too, Azula," Katara said softly, Yue echoing the sentiment by squeezing Azula tighter around her waist.
"Let's move to the sofa," Ty Lee suggested after they had stood embraced for a while. "I think what we need right now is a big four-way comfort cuddle session."
Nobody seemed to have an issue with Ty Lee's brilliant suggestion. Under normal circumstances, Azula would have probably been freaking out a little about the promise of so much physical affection, but she was still riding the emotional high that made her feel braver than usual where her emotions were concerned. For the next hour or so, they were supposedly watching a movie, but Azula doubted that any of them actually managed to follow the plot, as they were far more focused on each other on the sofa. Yue and Ty Lee definitely made each other the focus of their cuddling, but it was by no means exclusive, so Azula didn't exactly have Katara all to herself. She wasn't frustrated by that, however. She was too busy getting high from all the physical affection that she sometimes still struggled to accept, even if she had been getting better and better at it ever since becoming friends with Katara.
Afterwards, they ended up leaning against each other on the sofa in one big happy and slightly exhausted pile. "Alright, I've never had a homecoming like this," Azula remarked dryly, earning herself a few tired chuckles. "Honestly, though… I should probably tell you the details of what my father agreed to," she said. Azula had never told Katara and Ty Lee that she was going to include them in her list of demands, firstly because she had expected the two obnoxious do-gooders to try and talk her out of it, secondly because she hadn't been sure if she could get Ozai to accept these demands, so she hadn't wanted to promise something only to later be unable to deliver on it.
"Well, I guess, if you want to ruin the happy mood," Ty Lee said.
"Azula, you said that you just wanted your father to leave you alone," Katara added. "When we spoke on the phone and you told me that you got him to agree to your demands, I thought that was what you meant."
"Uh oh… has someone been omitting the truth from us?" Yue asked teasingly, giving Azula a playful wink.
"Uh, it wasn't like that," Azula gulped nervously. "But hear me out and I promise that you won't become angry. I spent a lot of time thinking about this, and I decided that I was entitled to some monetary compensation for what my father did to me. Ten thousand yuan per month doesn't sound too bad, does it?"
"Oh, that's awesome!" Ty Lee cheered. "Are you going to quit working at the Dragon then?"
"Honestly, I hadn't thought about it," Azula admitted. "I don't know. I have to say… I kind of like some things about my job, so we'll see, I guess," she said it while giving a sidelong glance at Katara. Katara being a daily patron of the teahouse Azula worked at was the main reason why Azula loved her job. Azula especially loved the way Katara's eyes seemed transfixed on the sway of her hips as she walked up to Katara's table while wearing that cutesy Jasmine Dragon uniform. "Anyway, Ty, since you and your family have suffered so much because of the actions of my father, I saw fit to also negotiate on your behalf."
"What… are you talking about, Azula?" Ty Lee asked nervously.
"Well, first of all, I asked Ozai to remove your father's name from the blacklist he had placed him on, so it should now be easier for your father to find employment," Azula explained. "Also, I opened a bank account in your name. Ty Lee Watanabe will find five thousand yuan transferred to her account every month."
"I don't believe it! Thank you, Azula, thank you so much!" Ty Lee exclaimed happily, throwing her arms around Azula and pulling her close before planting a wet, sloppy kiss on Azula's cheek. Azula endured the affections stoically, casting a glance at Katara nearby, but her Water Tribe girl looked delighted for Ty Lee's sake, with no signs of jealousy in her eyes. "Oh my, this money will come in so handy!" Ty Lee looked deliriously happy.
"Why, are you quitting the Dragon then?" Azula asked.
"Heck no, I love working at the Dragon!" Ty Lee vehemently shook her head. "You see, Sokka promised to take me and Yue in search for my family on his next day off from work. I think we have a good lead on them now, so once I manage to find my folks, I can arrange for this money to be sent to them. That should be possible, yes? I don't really know much about how banks work."
"That should be easy to arrange," Azula nodded. "Anyway, we're not done yet. Katara…"
"Oh no…" Katara paled slightly. "Don't tell me that you took risks on my behalf. You shouldn't have!"
"Nonsense," Azula shook her head. "You have arguably done more for me than anyone else, and that's with my father having brought so much grief to your family. You will also receive a monthly payment of five thousand yuan in an account I opened in your name." Katara opened her mouth to say something, but Azula cut her off, plowing straight on. "Also, Ozai will make sure that your father's name is rightfully cleared of any accusations of negligence. Hakoda will be able to walk away from the Nakamura Industries with a very nice severance package."
Katara opened her mouth to say something, but she failed to produce any words. Instead, Katara began to cry as she threw her arms around Azula and pressed her lips against Azula's cheek. Azula felt her face starting to burn with simmering heat when Katara was in no hurry to pull away from the kiss. Azula was saved from embarrassment only by Yue and Ty Lee tackling them and they fell into a big and soft pile of hugs.
After another round of cuddling, it was Yue who spoke up next. "You know, all this talk of compensation has inspired me," she said. "I'm going to call my father tomorrow and work out the details with him. I think I'm also entitled to a monthly stipend after his failure to protect me from that asshole Hahn."
"I couldn't agree more," Katara added supportively.
"Anyway, I think it's a wonderful thing what you did for Kat and Ty, Azula," Yue continued. She leaned in and also gave the blushing Azula a kiss on the cheek. "This is why we love you, Azula. You're just so intensely loyal to those few rare people you call your friends. I feel like you would go way beyond what most people would do to stand up for your friends and protect them."
"You're exaggerating now," Azula managed, feeling a little embarrassed.
"She really isn't," Ty Lee argued. "You picked me off the street when most people would have probably chosen to ignore their down on their luck old friend, and you have been acting protective of me ever since. You're my best friend, Azula. I love you, you silly goose."
"Stop trying to make me tear up, my tear ducts have been working overtime from so much crying already," Azula sighed. She was feeling extremely flattered by all this praising, however.
"Oh, and let's not forget Azula's outstanding humility," Katara giggled, reaching in to run her fingertips across the line of Azula's jaw, the feather light touch sending butterflies fluttering at the pit of Azula's stomach.
"You're really pushing it now," Azula warned. She couldn't stop smiling like an idiot, though.
After some more cuddling, Ty Lee slipped away to grab a soda, but she never ended up coming back. Instead, Yue subtly made herself scarce as well, and before Katara and Azula knew it, they had been left all by themselves in the downstairs living room. This was what Azula had wanted all along, but now that she had Katara all to herself, she suddenly became tense and nervous. It didn't help that Katara seemed to have been struck with similar shyness.
This struck Azula as kind of ridiculous. They had already confessed to really liking each other. The final barrier standing between them was supposed to be gone, and yet Azula still found herself struggling to make this one last step across the finish line. It made her feel a little mad at herself. Had she gone to the Fire Nation, risking everything for herself, Katara and Ty Lee, only to come back and then stumble at what should be the easy part? Azula shook her head as if to clear it from any doubts and then turned to face Katara with newfound determination, only to find Katara eyeing her with fierce intensity in her eyes.
"Kat, I-" Azula began, but Katara quickly cut her off.
"No, let me go first," Katara insisted. Azula blinked in surprise. She had finally convinced herself to speak her mind, and now Katara just cut her off. Azula huffed, but backed off. "What you did for me and my family, Azula… I would have never asked it of you, but that you would think to do it for me on your own accord is the craziest, sweetest and most wonderful thing anyone has ever done for me," Katara said, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. "If I didn't love you already, I would have fallen for you right then and there. And now… now I'm just crazy about how much I want to be with you, Azula Nakamura."
The brazen, passionate confession took Azula's breath away. She knew that she was supposed to reply with something similar, and she did feel the same way as Katara did, but Azula's awkwardness once again decided to strike at the most inopportune moment. "Well, I… I like you too…" she managed. Katara peered at her curiously, looking a bit amused. "I mean… I want to be with you as well, of course."
"Wow, and such a wordsmith, too," Katara giggled. Azula was blushing like mad. Katara stopped giggling. There was raw and intense hunger in her eyes as she stared Azula down. Then Katara pounced, pinning Azula under her on the sofa, their faces coming very close together, noses nearly touching. Azula felt like she was hypnotized by the look in Katara's eyes. Katara wasn't closing the last inch of the distance to Azula's lips, however, and Azula was starting to become a little uncertain. Was Katara waiting for her to make a move? Azula summoned all the courage she had and began reaching towards Katara, at which point Katara also started to lean in. Azula opened herself to the kiss like never before, and the intensity of it set her nerve ends alight. Burning desire and hunger overtook them both as hands kept slipping everywhere, exploring cautiously at first, but quickly becoming bolder.
At some point, without letting go of Katara's lips, Azula rolled the other girl over on the sofa, ending up on top of Katara. The very passage of time seemed to stop, or at least Azula failed to notice it. Kissing Katara without any restraint was something she wanted to do until her lips became raw and swollen. And Azula would have never thought to stop, if not for Katara suddenly crying out, but it didn't seem to be in pleasure, but rather in distress. Azula pulled slightly away, a little worried, but when she saw tears in Katara's eyes, Azula's concern turned to horror. "Don't worry, Zula," Katara said softly, despite clearly being in pain. "Sorry, that stupid shoulder is bothering me a little bit."
Azula felt blood draining away from her face. She had totally forgotten about having hurt Katara, and now she had hurt Katara again. Agni, she really was the worst girlfriend material ever. "I'm so sorry, Katara," she said in a small voice.
"Please don't be upset about it, Zula," Katara said. She rose from the sofa to sit next to Azula. "It doesn't hurt nearly as much as I must have hurt you when I broke your trust."
"I don't want to dwell on that now, Kat," Azula said hastily. She already knew that forgiveness would come in time. Her friends seemed determined to learn from their mistakes and Azula wanted to give them this chance. "Is there anything I can do to help with your shoulder?" she asked.
"If you could just pop over to the fridge and get some ice, as well as a clean towel, that would be great," Katara smiled. Azula did as she was told, hurrying like a wind and returning shortly with the supplies. Katara quickly made a cold compress and handed it back to Azula. "I'll need your help to keep it in place for a while, okay?" she said softly, then surprising Azula by swiftly removing her light grey turtleneck. Azula went rigid at the sight of Katara in nothing but her bra, but Katara quickly turned around to present her back to Azula.
"Oh no…" Azula sobbed as she saw the state of Katara's shoulder. The bruising was very severe, and a large hematoma had formed already. Azula froze, starting to tear up. She couldn't believe that she had done something so horrible to Katara. It looked worse than any of the bruises Azula had sported after Ozai had beaten her.
"Azula, please breathe," Katara spoke calmly, forcing Azula to snap out of her thoughts that threatened to spiral into a dark and depressing vortex. "This is just some bruising as a result of an accidental fall. Please, don't work yourself into a state over nothing. Just hold the compress against my shoulder and keep it there, okay?"
"Okay," Azula whispered, doing as she was told.
"Azula," Katara said, her voice trembling slightly as she spoke. "Do you think we can be alright after all of this? Or have I ruined everything with my stupidity?"
"I want us to be alright, Katara," Azula replied earnestly. "I think that as long as we both want that, we should be alright."
"You know that I meant what I said upstairs, and it wasn't something I said just to get you to forgive me," Katara said, turning her head to look at Azula behind her. "That I… I love you."
Azula felt her cheeks grow impossibly hot as she could barely hold Katara's intense gaze. "I… I l-love you too," Azula managed awkwardly, yet sincerely. "And even though I can't forgive you right here and now, Kat, it doesn't change that I still want to be with you." The relief in Katara's face was indescribable and it filled Azula with so much joy that it astounded her.
"And I obviously want to be with you, so I'm guessing that makes us official?" Katara asked, sounding unusually timid. Azula merely smiled and nodded at her. Katara turned away to look ahead of her, but even if Azula couldn't see Katara's face, she could still sense that warm, soft smile on Katara's lips. "Oh, that ice is really helping," Katara said a while later. "The pain is almost completely gone. A little while longer, and I should be good to return to more fun activities with you, Zula."
Azula went red in the face from Katara's frankness. Obviously, she was desperate to get back to kissing Katara. "That sounds like an excellent idea," she agreed with a nod.
Katara laughed a little. "No kidding. All those months of wanting you, but being unable to do anything about it," she sighed happily. Azula felt an intense wave of heat washing over her and triggering some very interesting reactions from her body. The thought of Katara wanting her so much felt incredibly empowering, however, emboldening her. She reached out and placed her free hand on Katara's unhurt shoulder, feeling the slight, excited tremble that passed through Katara's body as a result. Azula leaned forward and her lips brushed ever so slightly against the side of Katara's exposed neck. Katara's reaction was a throaty purr, almost reminding Azula of the sounds Ran and Shaw made when they were being petted.
Katara suddenly swirled around to face her, wide-eyed and breathing heavily. Azula once again went rigid at the sight of Katara wearing nothing from the waist up but her bra. She had seen Katara wearing a bikini that was far more revealing – and what a sight that had been – but somehow this felt far more intimate. "I just realized how late it is," Katara exclaimed. "Sokka is about to return from his community college classes any minute now. I would rather avoid being caught in a compromising position."
"That's a… very good point," Azula admitted reluctantly. Sokka walking in on them would have probably given her therapist a field day. "I'm just sad for the evening to end already," she admitted, a little petulantly.
"It doesn't have to end, Azula," Katara smiled coyly at her. "Didn't you hear me talking about how much I want you? I'm happy to continue in either your room or mine… if you feel ready for it. And please, don't feel pressured. I don't set the pace, Azula. We set the pace."
Azula stopped to think for a moment. She was obviously terrified of taking the step that Katara was offering, but she also desperately wanted it. She wanted Katara so much. She had fantasized about this moment for months, if not years. The fear was crippling, of course. There was obviously so much to be afraid of. And there was the very real possibility that despite how much Katara seemed to want this, Azula would somehow end up ruining it, just because ruining things was what Azula always did.
But something had also changed in Azula's attitude. Before, she hadn't dared to pursue this relationship with Katara because she had been afraid that her father would end up taking it from her, as he always did with everything she loved, but now that threat had been removed. She was free to pursue Katara, the girl of her dreams, and the only thing that was stopping Azula now was Azula herself. Oh, she was so adept at denying herself what was obviously good for her, but… after having waited on this for more than a year, Azula knew that if she allowed this opportunity to slip by her, she would hate herself until the end of her days. No matter how certain of the eventual failure Azula was, she could not stop herself from at least making an honest go at this.
"I want you so badly that it really scares me, Katara. I've wanted you for so long," Azula said with a surge of unexpected boldness. "My room it is," she added, just before their lips met in another kiss.
Next chapter: Azutara is finally official! Let's fast forward a month or so to the winter holidays and see how our girls are getting along.