Recap:
"Mija, I can't tell you what decision to make," he told her. "But it truly is small world for them to end up being the same guy. But I know Luke pretty well now. He's a good guy. If he knows and hasn't told you, I can't believe his intentions around that decision aren't genuine. Best thing you can do is talk to him."
"I know you're right," she told him. "But what if Luke doesn't feel the same way?"
"Then he's an idiot," he told her simply. She laughed, shaking her head.
"I'm going to go get ready," she told him, standing up and giving him a kiss on the cheek. "Thanks dad."
"Anytime," he smiled. "You're going to rock it tonight. I can't wait to see you shine."
She smiled and headed up the stairs to get herself ready. Her phone chimed as she was gathering her clothes to head to take a shower. She took a breath and glanced at the message. LP. Or Luke, she thought. Taking a deep breath, she opened the message.
J-
Safe zone, always. No matter what. No matter how bad.
I'd hope if this guy was keeping something from you, he has a good reason. Benefit of the doubt?
From what I know of you, you're incredible. He would be an idiot to not feel the same about you as you do him. He's a lucky guy.
-LP
She read the message over and over, a smile fighting to form on her face. He thought she was incredible. If Luke knew she was J, then this was a silent admission of his genuine feelings. And that made her feel good about it.
She figured first get through tonight's performance and then…then she would find a way to lay it all out there. No more misunderstandings, no more hidden truths.
Now or Never.
Chapter 6
The venue was packed. People were piled in and eagerly waiting for the show to begin.
The guys arrived early to ensure all was set up and were now in the back, waiting for Julie and for their cue for the show to begin with their opening number. Reggie was strumming some chords on the guitar as a pass time, Alex was pacing—his way to fight off the nerves that always hit right before a big show—and Luke kept anxiously checking his phone for the time and new messages. The more time passed without Julie's appearance, the more nervous he became.
"Any word from Julie?" Alex asked, looking over at an anxiety ridden Luke.
"Not yet," he shook his head.
"You must've really pissed her off," Reggie mused. "Maybe she changed her mind and isn't coming."
"She wouldn't just not show," Luke denied, though part of him did wonder if he had in fact, pissed her off.
'You sure?" Reggie pressed. Before Luke could respond, Julie came bursting through the door slightly frantic.
"Sorry, sorry, sorry," she rushed out as she entered the room. Luke quickly stood up breathing a sigh of relief.
"You ok?" he asked, hoping whatever had been troubling her earlier wasn't still weighing heavy on her mind.
"We thought you weren't coming," Reggie admitted. She had been placing her items on the empty table to sort what she needed to get ready for the show but stopped in her tracks and looked at the three of them. She was met with three very concerned faces.
"I would never not show," she told them softly.
"I told them that," Luke assured her.
"My car wouldn't start," she told them. "And Flynn might as well be driving Miss Daisy. I was losing my mind with how slow she was going." She explained. "I just need sort everything now that I'm finally here."
"There's a room in the back if you need to get changed," Alex offered. "Or we can step out." She looked at them with an amused expression. Their anxiety was rolling off them in waves.
"I'll change in the back," she smiled. "Are you guys ok?"
"Yea, we're good," they all said at the same time.
"You look nervous as hell," she laughed. "You'd think it was your first rock show, not mine." That got them to laugh.
She grabbed her back and went to the bag to get ready for the show. She'd teased them for looking nervous but internally she was kind of freaking out. She'd performed before, sure. But this was entirely different atmosphere. A different crowd. But as nervous as she felt, the thrill of it all outweighed any other emotion. And there was the Luke/LP of it all. She was trying to keep that revelation and its possibilities in the back of her mind to be present with the band.
She changed into her outfit, still in disbelief she'd let Flynn convince her to wear this particular ensemble. Tight leather pants with diamond studs along the side, a deep purple corset top with black lace embroidered along the boddice and a black leather sleeveless vest to complete the look. She stared at her reflection for several moments. She was certainly far off form her classical performance days, that was for sure.
After several deep breaths, she opened the door and stepped out to join the guys.
"Ok, whos' ready?" she asked. The guys turned to look at her and share in her enthusiasm to perform but stopped short when they took in her appearance. Luke couldn't help but do a double take as he took at her outfit and how well it emphasized her figure.
"Ow," Luke exclaimed…Reggie had elbowed him.
"Say something," Reggie whispered.
"You look incredible," Luke offered. A blush crept its way onto her cheeks as she shyly looked down, whispering her thanks.
"Smooth," Reggie whispered in his ear. Luke rolled his eyes.
"You look like a rock star," Alex smiled at her.
"What they said," Reggie smiled. "We'll go check with the stage manager. We should be on any moment." Reggie nodded to Alex, trying not so subtly to give Luke and Julie a moment.
"You're really ok?" Luke asked as he took a hesitant step towards her.
"Yea," she smiled, matching his movement by taking a step closer to him as well. "Admittedly, I'm a little nervous."
"What's got you nervous?" he asked, now directly in front of her looking into her eyes. "You've performed before, right?"
"Well yea," she smiled. "It's just so different."
"But a good different?" he asked, unsure.
"Different in the best way," she smiled. She reached out to take his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. He glanced down to wear their hands were connected, not planning on being the first to let go. "Thank you."
"For what?" he looked into her eyes.
"For bringing music back into my life," she told him. "For encouraging me to pursue music…if that's what I was truly passionate about. For reminding me it's what my mother would've wanted… Take your pick of things I'm thanking you for."
He smiled at her, taken back by her admission.
"I meant it all, you know," he whispered. "You're incredibly talented. Sharing that talent with the world and moving them with your music? It's the best part of being a musician. Even if you don't want to join the band after today…I hope you'll still pursue this."
"I didn't say I wouldn't join the band…" she told him. "Just that I had to think about it." She smirked.
"So you'll join?" he asked, hopeful.
"We'll see," she teased. Before he could respond, Reggie peaked his head through the door.
"Show time," he alerted them. They jumped, startled by his sudden appearance.
"We're coming," they told him.
Hand in hand—without even realizing—they walked towards the door to head to the stage for the big show, Julie not realizing the pointed look Reggie was sending their way as they passed him.
=======CFF====CFF=======CFF======
All lights on the stage were out, signaling to the crowd the start of the opening number. The anticipation for the start did not go unnoticed. Julie took her seat at the keyboard, the guys in their respective positions. Even in the dark, she could feel Luke's gaze on her. Being around him in general since realizing he was LP was like every nerve ending was on live wire: she was hyper aware of him no matter how close or far apart they were.
Their opening number ironically was the song she'd helped them with that day in the cafe...Bright. Taking a deep breath, she placed her fingers on the keys of the keyboard and began to play the opening cords as the spotlight brought her to the focus for the crowd. As soon as the guys jumped in, the entire stage was lit, lights illuminating each member strategically.
It was like the year of not playing never existed. Her fingers danced across the keyboard hitting the keys without a second thought. Until they reached the chorus…then she grabbed hold of the microphone and joined the group center stage, joining them as they all let the music take them to another place.
Rise through the night you and I
We will fight to shine together
Bright forever
And rise through the night you and I
We will fight to shine together
Bright forever
As Luke took over the next verse, she turned towards Reggie who was to her right. The two dancing together as Reggie strummed away before they both turned and included Alex in their mini rock out session. She joined again when the chorus repeated, turning toward the audience. She'd made glances over at Luke noticing she'd caught him staring at her in wonder. Rehearsals were great and each practice was better than the last. But this was different. The connection and the chemistry they each felt towards each other off stage was enhanced tenfold. They were drawn to each other. Whatever it was led Julie toward Luke as he started the next verse, luring him away from his mic towards her.
In times that I doubted myself
I felt like I needed some help
Stuck in my head
With nothing left
His eyes shown in the excitement as they shared the stage. She repositioned the mic for her to take the next verse, Luke not leaving her side. Instead, coming in closer as she turned and leaned her back toward his chest but not close enough to interfere with his ability to play. The two were so lost in themselves they didn't notice the looks being exchanged between Alex and Reggie during the entire interaction.
And when I feel lost and alone
I know that I can make it home
Fight through the dark, and find the spark
And rise through the night you and I
We will fight to shine together
Shine together
Bright forever
Bright forever
And rise through the night you and I
We will fight to shine together
Shine together
Bright forever
Bright forever
The crowd erupted in applause and cheer as the song came to an end.
Luke took an extra moment to look at Julie who was smiling brightly at him and the crowd before he moved over to his microphone to announce the next set. It was Julie's song, Flying Solo. And while she knew she'd written this song initially for Flynn who had been there despite distance when her mother first passed, it was Luke she directed her intent in that moment and gaze to as she sang the lines "And if somebody hurts you, I'm gonna get hurt too".
The show went on in similar fashion the rest of the night. Exchanged glances. Shared microphones. Rock out sessions with Reggie and Alex. She was on such a high from performing as they concluded their encore and left the stage. Alex and Reggie beat Luke to giving Julie a congratulatory hug over how well the entire night went. They patted Luke on the back as they headed back to the room to give them a moment.
They didn't know who made the first move nor did it matter, the excitement of the night and the urge to be close led the two to come together in a tight embrace. After some time, they pulled away but didn't let go. Julie's hands remained on Luke's shoulders as his hands lowered to a secure spot on her waist.
"You absolutely crushed it!" he beamed at her with pride. "They LOVED you!"
"Are you kidding," she shook her head. "Us. They loved US."
"You can't say you didn't enjoy it out there," he smiled at her.
"You know I did," she laughed.
"So then what do you say," he looked at her innocently. "Join us?"
She hesitated. She wanted to say yes. And her intentions were to join. But she wanted to figure out the Luke/LP business before making that commitment to the band. She didn't know if she could handle seeing him so frequently and working alongside him if he didn't know she was "J" and had feelings for someone else this entire time. Not with how connected the two were off AND ON stage. But now just wasn't the appropriate time to bring that up.
How would she go about mentioning something like that anyway? "Hey, talk to any new random strangers via e-mail lately? Yea? Me too…and I think it's you I've been talking to all along. LP?" It sounded so silly in her head. She couldn't imagine what it'd sound like if she said it out loud.
She'd been lost in thought over the entire situation the shift was evident and seen in her features which were now brimmed with the uncertainty and hesitation she was feeling. He caught on and noticed immediately.
"Hey, what is it?" he asked. He resisted the urge to move his hand to her cheek…they weren't there yet but god did he want to be able to breach those walls and finally give in to his emotions. He could tell she felt the same.
"It's nothing, nothing," she shook her head. She started to pull away. "Let's go see what the guys are doing, shall we?"
She headed in the direction of their room before he could press the issue further. But the shift wasn't hard to miss. It was the same as back during rehearsal so whatever was bothering her from before clearly wasn't nothing. And it made him anxious to no end. He had no other choice but to follow her. The guys were pacing, waiting for them. Adrenaline was still pumping they couldn't sit still.
"That was AMAZING you guys!" Reggie burst as soon as he saw Julie walk through the door, Luke not far behind her.
"It really was!" she agreed.
"So you'll join the band?" Alex asked, hopeful.
"Please say you will," Reggie added. They ignored Luke's signal behind Julie not to bring it up. He already had. Last thing he wanted was for her to feel pressured by them to join.
"Let me think on it guys," she smiled.
"What's to think about?" Reggie asked, missing that as Julie's cue to change the subject and Luke's pointed glare from behind her.
"You're right Reggie," she admitted. "There's not much to think about. Tonight, was incredible. That feeling on stage...I've never felt anything quite like it."
"So…yes?" Reggie pressed yet somehow an innocent look was etched on his face as he looked around the room.
Before Julie could answer, Flynn burst through the door in all her screaming glory. But that moment was all Julie needed to distract from the new constant question of will she or won't she join the band. Flynn nearly tackled Julie to the ground as she embraced her best friend.
"Legendary!" she all but screamed. "The four of you will be freaking legendary!"
"Can't…breathe…Flynn…" Julie managed to get out, trying to get Flynn to loosen her embrace.
"Oh right, sorry," Flynn let go and then went on to congratulate the guys.
Julie took that opportunity to find herself a seat. Close enough to share in the excitement of the night's show but also enough distance to allow herself to think. While the others got lost in their conversations…she decided to have a little fun and take her phone out to finally answer LP aka. Luke. She read over his previous message and hit reply.
LP—
What a night. What a show!
I had no clue what a thrill performing like this would be. I'd never felt anything close to that during piano recitals.
The guys want me to join their band. I want to.
I want to join very much. But I'm torn.
How was your show? What'd you say the name of your band was again?
You flatter me—incredible? Cue blush.
Talk soon?
-J
She hit send and put her phone away.
A moment later, she saw Luke reach in his back pocket where his phone was tucked away and check as though he was alerted of a new notification. Too much. Obviously by now she knew it was Luke. But still, seeing him receive a message—her message—moments of her sending her reply was freaky in its own right. Deciding to get some separation, she stood and started getting her things together. She knew her dad and brother were going to be waiting for her so she figured, why not duck out now.
"Hey, you headed out?" Alex had come up to her as she was getting her stuff together. She saw over his shoulder Luke engrossed in whatever message he was typing into her phone.
"Yea," she smiled. "Lame to duck out early but I promised my dad and brother I'd meet them after the show."
"Ah," he nodded in understanding. But she could tell there was something on his mind.
"What's on your mind Alex?" she put her bag aside, giving him her full attention.
"Nothing," he shook his head.
"Hey," she assured. "I know I haven't known you all that long, but I like to think I read people pretty well. It seems something bugging you. If it is and you want to talk about it, I'll always lend an ear."
"It's just…"he paused. "And I don't want you to feel like we're pushing you here or anything. But I just want you to know that I-we all actually—really think you're incredible and would love to have you as a bandmate. Whatever's giving you pause; you can talk to us about it. Ask the guys…I overthink just about everything. Talking it out sometimes helps." She laughed.
"I want to join," she whispered to him.
"But?" he asked, genuinely curious.
"But I really need to figure something out before I do anything," without realizing, she'd gazed over at Luke, staring intently at him and his phone. Alex noticed. He definitely noticed. "I'll get my shit together and let you know what I decide."
"Of course," he smiled.
"I'm gonna duck out while everyone's distracted," she told him. "Say bye for me?" He nodded in agreement and watched as she quietly slipped out unnoticed. He glanced over at Luke, who was putting his phone down.
"Did Julie message you?" Alex asked point blank. Luke had a moment of panic at the question, thinking Julie was still there, until he looked around the room and realized she was gone. "She's not here, you can say."
"She did," Luke told him, confused.
"Wait what the hell?" Flynn asked, standing up with her hands on her hips. "You two blabbed?"
"Hey we didn't do a thing," Reggie put his hands up in mock surrender.
"I figured it out myself, thanks," Luke rolled his eyes. "How'd you know she messaged me?"
Ignoring his question, Alex looked at Flynn. "Does Julie know she's messaging Luke?" Everyone looked at her expectantly.
"Hey don't give me that look," she told them. "If she does, she hasn't said a word to me. As far as I know she doesn't but…" She got a distant look on her face, as though recalling a memory.
"But what?" Luke stood up, almost in a panic.
"But the other day at rehearsal she was acting a little weird, asking random questions," Flynn started.
"Random questions like what?" Luke asked.
"Like how I knew she was at the park-which I didn't-and randomly asking what your last name was…literally out of nowhere," she told him. His eyes grew wide.
"Patterson?" Reggie chimed in. "What's the big-oh! L. P."
"I think she knows," Alex told them.
"Maybe that's what been buggin' her?" Reggie mused. They all looked at him. "What? Luke said himself she'd been acting weird after rehearsal. After she maybe made the connection?"
"She did send me that message saying the guy she's falling for may or may not be lying to her after rehearsal," Luke recalled. "Crap." He sat down, dropping his face in his hands.
"What's the big deal?" Flynn asked. "You know. She knows. You can both be in the know together and come out of virtual la la land."
"If she thinks I've been lying to her, you really think she'll really give me a chance?" he asked in disbelief.
"Does she even know that you know?" Flynn rebutted. "Start there. If she thinks you don't know, then it's probably crossed her mind the guy she's into is into someone else. I know Julie. She would go there in her endless possibilities she dwells on."
"That would explain her hesitancy to join the band," Reggie added.
"I gotta talk to her," Luke said, standing up. "Why did she leave? When did she leave?"
"Snuck out around the time you were writing her back," Alex told him. "She said bye, by the way." Luke rolled his eyes.
"She's probably gone by now," Flynn told him. "If she was trying to duck out unnoticed, she would've urged Ray and Carlos to head out just as quick. She gets too in her head sometimes. She's processing."
"Maybe I can stop by her place," Luke thought aloud.
"Or let her process and next time you see her, just be real with her," Flynn rolled her eyes.
"Or that," Reggie agreed.
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Julie didn't get much sleep that night. She was still processing how to best address the Luke/LP issue so she could finally tell the guys what she planned on doing about joining the band. She knew Luke messaged her back…he was typing away when she snuck out of there. But she was had been nervous to read what he said. She'd wondered if he'd be straight with her and tell her his band name or if he would continue dancing around the question. And he had. He avoided it altogether and focused on assuring her once more of her awesomeness and congratulating her on a successful night. He'd asked, probing, what was causing her to feel torn to join when it was clear in her messages how much she'd wanted to.
She'd yet to respond.
She'd been back and forth between figuring out what she would say to him, having promised herself she would be straight with him and finishing the poems she'd been working on while at the park. The performance last night and the spark between her and Luke inspired her and she couldn't stop writing even if she tried.
She'd arrived at the music center the next day an hour after she knew the band would be back in the studio working on songs. New orders had arrived and she decided before heading to the back and facing them she would go through and make sure clients were contacted to pick up what was ordered. There weren't many boxes to go through so why not help out.
She went through three boxes before opening up the last one. She paused when she saw the contents of the box. T-shirts. She pulled out one of the shirts which had a killer design for the band "Sunset Curve" written on it.
Putting down the shirt, she pulled the paperwork out and saw the thread of notes added…more importantly the correction which had been made for the order. The order which previously indicated the shirts were to read "Sunset Swerve". Swerve being the word Luke as LP mentioned needing correcting to Curve.
Well, she thought to herself. Every other scenario she'd envisioned being a way to drop the revelation of her being the J Luke had been corresponding with, this was definitely an easy and effective ticket for it. She took her phone out, knowing he undoubtably would have his phone on hand given she hadn't shown up yet to rehearse with them…no doubt also wondering if she would.
Hi:
Thought you'd like to know your Sunset Curve t-shirts arrived. Good thing you supervised the corrections to Reggie's (I'm assuming it was Reggie) error from Swerve. The shirts look killer.
Whenever you're done rehearsing, they're at the music center for you.
J - Julie. It's Julie.