Chapter One: Creation Myth
The Goddess Kaguya did not want a world or an empire; she wanted a family.
So it was that Kaguya created two children from the ether using her infinite power. These children she raised as her own. Over time, however, they became bored and lacked discipline, and she could not teach them without limited resources.
Thus, in order to raise her two demigods, she created a world for them to have adventures in.
She sent them to sleep and descended to the Earth to prepare the way. There she created a great tree, intended to gradually drain the earth's life. Once that was done, she went through a number of motions to give context to it to the humans she created.
And yet something held her back.
Kaguya became interested in the humans and spent some time with them. It was only natural that she terrified and awed them. First, however, she spent time with an Emperor of some power. Nothing to her, but eventually, she was given a handmaiden. Her name escaped Kaguya, but she was...
Interesting.
She often talked to her, treating her as a sort of divine cipher. In a way, it was true. And yet she was always respectful, and Kaguya began to almost like the place. The green fields and the stars were nice while they lasted. The God Tree was not yet growing, and so long as Kaguya was here, it would not.
It really only existed to give a ticking clock to her sons.
And then the Emperor just had to go and ruin everything. Somebody decided to kill her, and Kaguya found herself pursued by an angry mob. Her handmaiden, loyal dear that she was stayed with her.
And then she was killed.
She'd died at Kaguya's feet. It hurt a great deal, more than it ought to.
So Kaguya arranged a cycle of reincarnation so she could come to get her after all this way over. Then she took the fruit of the God Tree and left. Then there was something about the end of the world or an Infinite Tsukiyomi; she didn't care.
Things had been set in motion.
But Kaguya decided that she needed a mortal agent other than herself. For a start, she planted her handmaiden with orders to stay near Ashura {that was what he had been named.} and observe him. At the same time, she created a very different creature to watch Indra, named Zetsu. From there, the show watched them grow in power and become great heroes.
Then there was something about a Sage of Six Paths or something; she didn't care. He was just a means to get her sons into the world.
Only then the fights started.
It was quite irritating, really. They just couldn't get along, and no matter how many lives they lived, they kept quarreling. She tried to set up a common enemy, but the problem was that nobody could stand against them. They were the only people who could fight on their own level.
So, Kaguya created a bunch of different, weaker clans for them to battle instead or between battles. She also created the spirits so that some of their powers would have conditions for using them. And she made rules that you had to use hand signs and gestures to utilize the powers they wielded.
At this point, things started to get really interesting.
Ashura and Indra were still all-powerful, but people were now strong enough to give them a run for their money in the early stages. This meant that they were learning to master themselves at a far faster rate. And everybody else was able to have their own rivalries and battles.
That was about the point Ashura and Indra became Hashirama and Madara.
And they started to get organized. And other ninjas started to organize against them. There were lots of deals and everything else imaginable. By all accounts, a good time ought to be had by all. But the reports from Kaguya's handmaiden were that it was quite the opposite.
The problem was that not everyone had time to learn jutsu. Most of the population spent their time farming. The ninja were a sort of elite, and this led to a disconnect that caused problems. Everybody was trying to fix it, but a lot of rivalries had gotten out of hand.
Virtually everyone by now was miserable most of the time. And Hashirama and Madara, now Naruto and Sasuke, hated one another.
"You two really must fix this rivalry," said Kaguya. "Don't you think it would be better to be friends?"
And she tried to contact her handmaiden.
The problem was that her handmaiden was not taking any of her calls. She'd gone off and was hanging around a group of completely unimportant ninja. Apparently, she was spending time assassinating people. And she was very good at it.
She was a martial arts master, could nail a bird from a mile away with a kunai, and was not acting as a lady ought to. In fact, she seemed to be trying to be a man. She hadn't paid even the slightest attention to Naruto and, in fact, had a very low opinion of him.
As far as she was concerned, he ought to be denied his birthright because he didn't... work hard?
What was this hard work she spoke of?
You were either all-powerful or you weren't Kaguya. There was no gray area.
Perhaps this odd trend ought to be explained by her surroundings.
And her companions were... bizarre. You had Guy, a shell-shocked veteran pretending to be a child, Rock Lee, an idiot with no qualifications. And Neji, a slave who was planning to murder his Master and her family.
That was... disturbing.
Not only that, but he seemed to think he had a right to do it. Because his father, also a slave, was sacrificed to save his Master. He ought to have been honored to be chosen for such. But instead, he was even now planning a way to legally kill his cousin.
Wait, cousin?
So he was a slave to his own family?
What was wrong with all of these people?!
"Zetsu, what is going on down there?" asked Kaguya.
"I've been trying to engineer the downfall of the Shinobi system and engineer the Infinite Tsukiyomi as per your orders," said Zetsu.
"What orders, what are you talking about?" asked Kaguya.
"Weren't you the one who manipulated Madara?" asked Zetsu.
"I'm not sure," said Kaguya. "I'm taking a grand scope of things at the moment. I might be doing it on a smaller scale, though. It doesn't seem like something I would do without a good reason.
"Do you have any recommendations?"
"Destroy the world," said Zetsu. "And kill everyone in it."
"That's a little aggressive," said Kaguya.
"I have been watching these idiots play ninja for millennia," said Zetsu. "It's been quite trying. At present, Nagato looks like he is about to do it himself."
"Who is Nagato?" asked Kaguya. And then she realized she honestly didn't know.
"...This could be a problem," said Zetsu. "Perhaps you'd better take a look for yourself."
Kaguya did take a look.
She peered down into the realm where Nagato was and saw nothing. No one and nobody. The entire Land of the Rain was obscured from her by clouds of grief. Someone or something had given pause to her and shut her off from her own nature.
"...I think I'd better destroy the world immediately before this escalates," said Kaguya.
"No," said Pain.
Kaguya whirled around and saw the image of a figure of terrible power, writhed in black robes with orange hair. For a moment, their eyes met, and a line of fire shot between them. For a moment, they contested, and Kaguya was strained. Her eyes burned with flame as sweat dripped from her.
Then, as quickly as he had come, Pain had vanished.
Who was he?
And why could she not detect him?
"Zetsu," said Kaguya. "What was that?
"I tried to destroy the world, and something managed to push back against me."
"My guess is that someone has raised up a god to try to prevent you from doing just that," said Zetsu. "Madara was aware of you on some level. And he has created multiple fail safes to prevent you, or someone like you, from interfering with his own plans."
"And what are those plans?" asked Kaguya.
"A project called the Infinite Tsukiyomi," said Zetsu. "Effectively designed to trap everyone in their ideal worlds forever."
"That's a terrible idea," said Kaguya. "The entire reason this world was created was to train Naruto and Sasuke for what was to come."
"That seems to be the crux of the issue," said Zetsu. "The rest of the population have dreams of their own. And they always have to sacrifice them to ensure Naruto and Sasuke get their way.
"Or whatever their name is at the moment."
"Well, of course they do," said Kaguya. "Naruto and Sasuke are their reason for living. Giving up who they are to help them is their arc."
"Perhaps you could explain that to them," said Zetsu.
"Do I detect a note of sarcasm in your tone," said Kaguya.
"You haven't exactly had a lot of communication with this world," said Zetsu. "And they've been having a hard time. They might be slightly upset to find out their entire existence is irrelevant."
"I suppose it might be a bit of a shock," said Kaguya. "I know this has been difficult for you Zetsu. What are your plans to deal with the Akatsuki?"
"At present?" asked Zetsu. "I'm already one of their founding members. Madara set the organization, but he's dead. You've got a power trio at the heart of it, Tobi, Konan, and Pain. Tobi is Madara's puppet and will be easily neutralized if it comes to it.
"Pain is our main threat. He is the effective commander of the Akatsuki and the face of the organization. Tobi might think he is in command, but if Pain decided to go rogue, he'd almost certainly win. Pain is a better fighter, smarter and more efficient, to say nothing of being the one to command the Akatsuki.
"Admittedly, Tobi has some resources that Pain needs and some loyal followers. But Konan is the leader of an entire nation and completely loyal to Pain. She will never betray him.
"Which means that Tobi maintains control of the triumvirate only so long as Pain lets him. Tobi desires the Infinite Tsukiyomi. Pain, in contrast, wants to simply brutalize the entire world into submission one way or another. I believe he views it as instilling discipline."
"She?" asked Kaguya, who had pictured a savage barbarian.
"Yes," said Zetsu. "She's quite powerful."
"What is it with this trend of women fighting," said Kaguya.
"It all started with Tsunade," said Zetsu. "You see, the wars got so bad that the nations had to start using female ninjas. They were supposed to be used only in a support role, but Tsunade broke the mold and managed to be very effective, both as a combatant and a healer."
"You mean to say that this is official national policy?" asked Kaguya. "And now my handmaiden has fallen prey to it. She hasn't communicated with me in ages."
"It might have something to do with the fact that she doesn't even know she has a mission anymore," said Zetsu. "I have tried to contact her and reawaken who she was before remotely. However, we were never acquainted, and she was not born of your will as I was.
"Her connection to you is more remote.
"My guess is that as the generations went by, her later lives put some distance between you. What is her name anyway?"
"It has probably changed so many times that it wouldn't be worth going over," said Kaguya.
"Then perhaps you should try to reconnect," said Zetsu. "The Leaf Village isn't even being led by an Uchiha or Senju anymore. They are largely coasting off of past glories, and there are several armies planning to attack it."
"What do they have to do with Naruto and Sasuke?" asked Kaguya.
"Nothing," said Zetsu. "Both of them are getting a slow start at the moment. I think they are sick of being completely unopposed. Maybe they want a challenge.
"If the Leaf Village gets burned down, though, it'll be very bad for everyone.
"What exactly is our plan?"
"At the moment," said Kaguya. "I think it would be best to utilize this Madara's plan. Trap everyone in the Infinite Tsukiyomi, then end the world. Once done, figure out what to do next."
"I suppose that does account for their choices," said Zetsu.
"We'll adjust the plan on the fly," said Kaguya. "This is nothing more than a play world anyway. We'll create a new one once we have more information."
"As you wish," said Zetsu.
Now then, what to do about all this?
Kaguya decided to scan the people that Naruto and Sasuke knew? Who were these Uchiha and Senju people anyway? They didn't seem very important. Okay, so Kiba had a dog, Shikamaru slept a lot, Choji was fat. Ino and Sakura had their priorities straight in that they wanted to get married, which begged the question of why they were trying to become professional assassins.
Kaguya decided she had to nip this ridiculous feminist ideology in the bud.
So, she'd just influence events henceforth so that every single female would be either held back, beaten easily, or have their triumphs rendered ineffectual. If all-female ninja were complete failures, they'd cut this ridiculous thing short.
Okay, Ino might make a good wife for Naruto or Sasuke; in fact, she was probably the best option. Hinata was cute and would do well as well.
Why was Sakura even here?
She was effectively a less powerful, less attractive, inferior copy of Ino, who was twice. She'd broken off years of friendship over a guy. What a bitch. Yeah, Sakura was not getting a single moment of triumph for the rest of her life. She would be given hope henceforth only to have it snatched away.
Also, she'd be put on a team with Naruto and Sasuke, just to demonstrate how utterly inferior she was.
That left Shino, Naruto and Sasuke.
Shino scared her.
Sasuke and Naruto were... not acting like usual. Usually, the two of them were super competent. However, it seemed they'd made a conscious decision to scale back their apparent powers. At the same time, both of them were isolated from the village for different reasons.
Sasuke was isolated because the entire Uchiha Clan were dead, slaughtered by Itachi Uchiha.
Honestly, Kaguya thought it was too good for them. They had attempted to overthrow the Leaf, a crime for which they had happily extermined other clans for. And to top it all off, they'd done so risking a full-scale world war, knowing full well they couldn't possibly win.
You'd never see the Hyuga doing something like this.
Well, except Neji, the ungrateful bastard. He'd probably have killed his clan with his own hands. And to top it all off, he hadn't done anything wrong yet, so Kaguya couldn't do anything to him. Well, payment was only put off.
Where was she?
Sasuke and Naruto?
Well, the real problem seemed to be that they lacked motivation. They were fundamentally motivated by being Sasuke and Naruto. Rather than by being Ashura and Indra, and there was no great crisis at hand. Sasuke wanted to kill Itachi, and Naruto wanted to be Hokage.
When was he going to ditch that dream anyway?
He'd already had that position. He made that position; why not give Sasuke a turn?
Apparently, Minato and Kushina Namikaze were Naruto's parents and had deliberately and knowingly left him a friendless orphan. Why was every parental figure in these villages a sociopathic monster?
Kaguya was an infinitely powerful being who couldn't directly touch this world without assimilating it. What was their excuse?
This was going to take a lot of hard work to fix.