The Dark Side of Disney
Episode 9: The Shadow Workers
Act One
Saturday, March 19 2022 AD 1600 hours
Within MIB HQ, Cobalt is on a computer in a private room. He presses a few buttons to have an aerial view of Disneyworld, where it showed a list of prison installations.
Computer: Confirming all prison installations. Viewing prisoner list… now.
A document comes into view, and it shows all the toons and li-acs imprisoned by the Dark Side of Disney, which are mostly all the protagonists of every movie and every TV show distributed by Disney, or owned by the company. Disturbed, Cobalt presses the X button to close it, and he flips up a video of the Fates telling him about the prophecy.
Atropos: [through footage] Until a year after the Dark Side was made, a child born in Canadian blood. On the twentieth year, should the chosen one fight, the Dark Side will fail.
After that, the video ended, with Cobalt puzzling and puzzling.
Cobalt: That's all they ever said. The Dark Side of Disney was founded on the 1st of June, three months and ten days before 9/11, before… Canada's evacuation. But the next year, and on the same day… the chosen one from Canada would be born to stop it. It still begs the questions: who is it? Where is it? And most importantly, can it be our best hope? Anakin Skywalker was the chosen one, and he was said to bring balance to the Force. But that was before… he became the very fiend he's sworn to destroy.
[beeps]
Cobalt: Enter.
The door slides open, and General Direwolf comes in.
Direwolf: Cobalt, I've got a mission for you. We're picking up readings of a car that's getting a little too close to enemy lines, and I need you to go check it out.
Cobalt: Roger that. I'll take Rocket and Groot with me. We'll get on the bus right away.
Direwolf: And take Saber with you. He hasn't been out of the wall since the Olympics.
Cobalt: Sir, we both know it's for his own good. He was lucky that it wasn't a death trap, but he-
Direwolf: There's no argument with this. Take him along.
Later, Cobalt has Saber, Rocket and Groot in the Magic School Bus to do their mission. The bus is in a bee-form to fly over the sky, and it is small enough to make it undetectable by the Dark Side.
Rocket: Now this is no better than the last time I was here. I feel like we're going to be bird food before any one of us returns to base.
Groot: I am Groot.
Cobalt: We have to take this because we're behind enemy lines. And birds would have to be faster to eat a bee like the bee-bus.
Saber: [concerned] Hey Cobalt, are you alright? You've been acting this way since Marchbreak first began.
Cobalt: I've been staring at that computer all day and yesterday, trying to formulate a plan, that's all.
Saber: Yeah, but at the same time, you've been looking up on the prophecy.
Rocket: What prophecy? The one where… some kid would defeat the Dark Side?
Saber: That's the one, yeah.
Groot: I am Groot.
Saber: No, we don't know who it is. We're trying to.
[bus honks]
Cobalt: We got the signal. I'll pull over to those trees.
By the time the bee-bus flies into the trees, it transforms to its normal size and shape. Cobalt and the others, armed and prepared, step out the door to be cautious in case they find something.
Cobalt: Ever since I've met the Fates, the prophecy is all I could think about.
Saber: And ever since you met the Fates, you couldn't get a decent night of sleep. Not even Jessica when she slept over.
Rocket: Well, who cares? We're winning the war day after day, and that's all we'd need to know.
Then, Groot sees something on the ground that he points to: car tracks. When Saber sees it, he kneels to feel it.
Saber: These are car tracks, alright. They're fresh, so…. It's not far ahead.
Cobalt: I see the tracks, but…. They're heading… east. Away from Disneyworld walls.
Groot: I am Groot.
Rocket: Hey, maybe it's a set up.
Saber: Well, I'll go check it out. Wait here.
Cobalt: No, Saber, wait!
But Saber ignores Cobalt as he marches forth into the foliage, while following the road with the car tracks leading the way. He goes further and further deep into the trees, until he finds the car, parked and abandoned. By the time he finds it, the others show up to go see it. Cobalt walks over to the front side of the car, and he finds the coat of arms for Ukraine.
Cobalt: That's the Ukrainian coat of arms. Strange. That wasn't in the scanners when the General picked that up.
Saber: [searching] There's nobody in the car.
Rocket: Maybe they just- [sniffs] Wait.
Rocket is sniffing the air, picking up a scent. And then, the car explodes, blowing everyone away, just before a man in a camouflaged tracksuit and mask steps out to attack.
Cobalt: AMBUSH!
Cobalt draws his sword, Dragon Marauder, to counter, and the man parries it with an umbrella. The two men fight and clang their weapons, until the man uses the umbrella hook to trip Cobalt over, then Cobalt fires his weapons to kill him. However, the tracksuit is bulletproof, and the man fires a dart from his wristwatch to disable the War Machine suit, before he aims his pistol at Cobalt's face.
Man: Stand down Colonel Rhodes, and nobody gets hurt.
Cobalt: You're talking to the wrong guy, buster.
Man: [surprised] Dieter?
The man flips open Cobalt's helmet to reveal his face, then he removes his own to reveal himself. He turns out to be Harry Hart, a veteran spy of the secret organization Kingsman from the Kingsman franchise.
Cobalt: Harry Hart?
Harry: Terribly sorry about this.
Harry grabs Cobalt's hand, helping him regain his bearings, and Saber comes over with Rocket and Groot.
Harry: I had to make sure no one from the Dark Side was following.
Cobalt: Man, it's good to see you again. So… what brings you here?
Harry: Someone wants to talk to you and the others.
Another man shows up from the trees, and he walks over to shake hands with Cobalt.
Man: Captain Cobalt. My name is Nicholas Jakovina. It is an honour to meet you at last.
Cobalt: The honour is mine, sir.
Afterwards, Harry and Nicholas are in Draco's cave. In there, Cobalt and Saber have Direwolf and Proto to listen in on the meeting.
Nicholas: I have come here all the way from Ukraine, and I am here on behalf of President Volodymyr Zelenskyy. So many of my people were sent away from their homes, cities were bombed, and the Russians keep occupying more and more of our once glorious country.
Draco: We have heard the news. This Vladamir Putin is trying to bring back the days of the Soviet Union.
Direwolf: We have been fully aware of it since February 28th, but what would your business be to come immediately, sir?
Nicholas: Something that we have been thinking for quite a while. My people have known about the Resistance facing off the Dark Side of Disney for years, and we… you could stop the invasion in Ukraine.
Cobalt: Wait…. You want us to enter the war?
Proto: It doesn't seem fair if we just ignore it, but aren't the Ukrainians-"
Harry: I hate to intervene with you all, but they have no other options. But this is why I've volunteered to join the Resistance to help investigate the battlefield.
Cobalt: Mr. Jakovina, we're all terribly sorry about what's happening in Ukraine, but we cannot just dash off out of the battlefield whenever we feel like it. We still have to-
Nicholas: I understand what you mean, but like Mr. Hart said before… we have no other options. The Resistance have always been a beacon of hope to anyone who don't side with Maleficent or her subordinates. I am not asking you, I am begging you to help my people. You are our only hope.
Cobalt: But why do you think that we could help?
Nicholas: Because you're Canadians, are you not? You know what evacuations feel like. [hesitates] I was hoping for my pregnant wife to give birth, and I would… watch our kids grow up in the places I liked when I was a child. But that plan… was destroyed. I had no choice but to leave it all behind. And when I did… we had every reason to know the Russians had destroyed every… single part of Ukraine that we all knew and held more dear.
Nicholas pauses for a bit, hesitates as a tear runs down his cheek.
Nicholas: And that's when the war started… but we felt like it was not enough to have it cease. Please, Captain. You're the only ones we can rely on.
Draco: It would be unwise to ignore desperate people's need, Captain. The Ukrainians have suffered long enough. Putin will stop at nothing to get what he wants.
Cobalt is listening to everything Nicholas was saying, but he isn't sure how to reply.
Direwolf: Huddle.
Cobalt, Direwolf, Proto and Saber have a huddle so they could have a private vote.
Direwolf: Mr. Jakovina does have a point. We had to evacuate Canada at 9/11, and that's what the Ukrainians are doing.
Proto: That's right.
Cobalt: Are you saying we should go with it? We've participated in the Olympics, and now this.
Proto: We should give it a shot. Because the Resistance is being known around the world now, and if we just… ignore the Ukrainians' call, then we'd be no better than the Dark Side.
Saber: Well, speaking of the Dark Side, we have to think about them as well.
Direwolf: And that's one of the reasons we should go to Ukraine. Personally, I want to make sure if Putin hasn't sided with them.
Saber: But what about the ones right here?
Cobalt: Wait, are you saying the enemy might be working overseas?
Proto: That hasn't been confirmed, but they just might.
Direwolf: Look, we won't stay there for long. We'll go to Ukraine, save the people, and kick some ass. But at the same time, make sure no one from Disney is involved with this war.
Cobalt: [thinking] You know… I've been wanting to make sure of it myself.
The huddle is over, and the Resistance have made a decision.
Cobalt: Mr. Jakovina, after careful confirmations, we have decided… to accept your offer.
Nicholas: You will?
Harry: Well, I'm glad that's been sorted out.
Direwolf: However, you must realize that we cannot stay there for long. Because if we stayed in Ukraine for the remainder of the war, we'll have so many delayed missions to deal with our own enemies.
Nicholas: I understand, General. The only thing I would want you to do is hit the invaders hard. Show them that Ukraine is our country, help cease the invasion, and protect whatever is left of it.
Draco: Then it has been decided. The Resistance will be going to Ukraine first thing in the morning. They only have ten days to complete their part of whatever mission the Ukrainians have.
Act Two
But in Disneyworld, the meeting is being watched by the Dark Side of Disney. Maleficent and her three remaining members of the Top Ten are seeing a holographic image of the Resistance on their stone table.
Hades: So they're going overseas to Ukraine. Talk about a death wish.
Ursula: A death wish means they compliment suicide.
Maleficent: Either way, they will get what's coming to them. As soon as they go to Ukraine and they discover they're Canadians, the Russians will have their country within their targeting zone.
Jafar: They're already on Putin's blacklist, and they're banished from entering Russia. If there's any outcome of what's going to happen, it is not only the death of the Resistance's founders… but also the full destruction of Canada.
Hades: Yeah, and then what? We've already taken half of the United States from here to California. Any act of Russia to just drop a bomb may be a party- at least, in my opinion- but it would trigger bad tones to the rest of the world. And then, here comes World War 3.
Maleficent: That would've been the plan for us, anyhow. There is an old saying: the enemy of my enemy is my friend. But today, our enemies are everyone. The Resistance will be facing the Russians, but things would go south for them, and there's spilling of Canadian blood, it will not only start the third World War, but it will have them destroy each other in the end. I would say… we let them kill each other until only the Dark Side remains. And if there are any survivors to challenge us….
Ursula: Then they will have a death wish.
Then Iago, Jafar's talking parrot, flies over to perch on his shoulder.
Iago: Yeah, yeah, yeah, so we all get the picture. But if we want the whole world to kill themselves, why keep talking about it when we should do it right away?
Jafar: Maleficent is always a fast thinker, Iago.
Hades: You know, I agree with the bird, even if what snakey-boy said is true. I think I could just-
Maleficent: Silence!
[thunderclaps]
Maleficent: We will dispose of our enemies, but it will take time. And most importantly… their deaths won't just be in our hands. But in… the Shadow Workers.
Back with the Resistance, Cobalt, Direwolf, Proto and Saber are in the conference room with Harry, discussing their assignment.
Cobalt: So, it's been made official. We are going to assist the Ukrainians with their war against the Russians, but did we really need to do this?
Direwolf: It's worth the risk anyway. What we can do is observe the battlefield there, and give assignments to some of our Resistance members to continue the job for us.
Cobalt: But this paramilitary branch was founded to oppose the Dark Side, and we're not sure if they've gotten anyone outside of the United States to their cause.
Harry: I believe they have. You see, just when 20th Century Studios was acquired by Disney, the Kingsman began assignments into Disneyworld to simply… identify them. Not just Maleficent or anyone of her Top Ten, but also the armies they've been assembling. For the first time in almost two years, we're close to knowing what they're up to. But most importantly, we've been knowing that there has been a talk about a prophecy.
Proto: That we know. It was said that on June the 1st, this year, a Canadian kid would turn twenty and stop the Dark Side. As far as we can tell, there's been no record of anyone born that date.
Direwolf: That can wait for now. We're in the middle of March.
Cobalt: But Harry, you said you're knowing what the Dark Side's up to, yes?
Harry: Indeed. Just last week, I intercepted a communication about Maleficent talking to someone, and scanners show that it was coming from one of the Russian occupied parts of Ukraine.
Saber: But… do you think it's Putin she's talking to?
Harry: Not likely. But I think it's someone who's worked closely with Putin, and Putin would have to be in Russian when the war's brewing.
Direwolf: Either way, we'd have to go check it out. I can ask the Anime Brigade to bring in their best characters, and Captain? Assemble some of the best from the Major Squad to tag along.
Cobalt: Understood. But… I don't know which to choose.
Saber: I've got one. We have Godzilla, so he can tag along.
Harry: And Saber should come as well. I will be spying behind enemy lines, and I think your team scout could assist me. And besides, he knows Godzilla better than anyone, if we're going to take him with us.
Cobalt: Harry, with all due respect, I don't believe Saber should go on this mission.
Proto: True. He was drafted into the Olympics last month, but that was meant for his brother to have the team misguided.
Harry: But under my protection… he will be safe. Unless… you're doubting my judgement.
[five second silence]
Cobalt: No. I never misjudge you, Harry. You're one of the many men from movies I've seen who can be trusted at all times. I just….
Harry: I understand. But I promise you… Saber will be safe and secured.
Direwolf: Then it has been decided… officially, anyway. Meeting adjourned.
Afterwards, it is sunset. Cobalt is walking down the wall with Draco, where they could have a talk in private.
Cobalt: I wasn't sure about this mission.
Draco: Which part, Captain? Where your brother's going for a recon or where you're going to Ukraine?
Cobalt: Probably… both. The Russians started this war to bring back the old days when… the Soviets were in control. But there have been recent concerns that there might be… a third World War, and if we intervened….
Draco: It won't be. Wars are made by full-scale assaults and worldwide panic. It was never the Soviet Union who started the World Wars. It was made after the first, and they were allies to the Americans in the second.
Cobalt: But in the aftermath, the Cold War began. That's probably what the Russians want. To finish what their country has failed to accomplish.
Draco: Perhaps… but tell me. Why did the Dark Side of Disney attack?
Cobalt: Because the villains who founded it were displeased with their fates in all of their worlds. They were thwarted from their goals by us, because we know them. We don't know anything about the Russians or Putin, so we're going to a death trap because we might be fighting blind.
Draco: Listen, the Russians and the Ukrainians have been having their conflict since 2014. Some say this war is a part of it, but occupations would never be overlooked when death tolls are involved. You and the others were selected for this… because those believe in you. You claim that you'll die because you don't know the Russians, but if you give yourself a chance by going there in person… you will, then the Resistance will be feared by more than just the Dark Side of Disney. That is why you must go there. Now… get some rest, Captain. They will be ready.
Draco spreads his wings and takes flight. Now alone, Cobalt leans on the wall railings, looking at the sunset and thinking about everything Draco told him about the mission. He stares at scenery for a while, and he comes to a conclusion as he lifts his head up.
Act Three
The next morning, Direwolf and Proto are standing at the takeoff bay where the Blue Typhoon, a large blue starship made by Tails from Sonic X, is being loaded and ready for departure to Ukraine. As Proto looks at a clipboard, Direwolf salutes to the members of the Anime Brigade to come along: Hunter Steele, Gohan from Dragon Ball Z, Astro from Astroboy, and more.
Direwolf: That's that. Anyone from the Major Squad, Proto?
Proto: Yes, sir. Rocket, Groot and the Terminator are coming. I was expecting Blue too, but she's requested by Universal Pictures for the new Jurassic World movie coming out.
And then, Cobalt walks on the catwalk in his War Machine suit, and salutes to Direwolf, ready to go as well. Then the Blue Typhoon takes off in a vertical takeoff, and it flies over the Atlantic, on its way to Ukraine.
In the locker room, Saber is putting on a Kingsman suit: a bulletproof suit, Oxford shoes, and eyeglasses equipped with audio-visual communications, and Harry is there to adjust it for him.
Harry: You look good in this suit, Saber.
And then, Cobalt enters the locker room, which Saber notices.
Saber: Cobalt, I know you don't think I should come along. But I'm not a little kid anymore. General Direwolf knows it. I just want you to-
Cobalt: Soldier! Your skills have never been in question; it is your maturity. I've argued this before, but the decision has been made. The only thing I can do is… wish you luck. [smiles warmly] Godspeed, little brother.
And with that, Cobalt took his leave out the room.
Later, Direwolf is in the cockpit, where Cobalt and Proto are circled around a table with a map of Ukraine, and he shows them the plan.
Direwolf: Now, here's how it works. We fly over Ukraine, and make a landing here at Kharkiv, where it is close to the occupied parts. Once we get there, our troops will keep the Russians occupied, while Hart and Saber will simply fly overhead and sneak their way into Moscow.
Cobalt: You're sending them way behind the frontlines?
Proto: If we want to make sure Putin hasn't conspired with the enemy. Our only best option is to infiltrate their headquarters and make sure of everything we need to know.
Direwolf: Cobalt, you will take your team to the frontlines, inform the Ukrainians about what's going on, and they'll try to assist you.
Cobalt: Roger that.
Direwolf: As for the Anime Brigade, Hunter and Piccolo will sneak overhead of the battlefield, and they'll infiltrate the Russians' base camp, ensuring the battle will be short-lived.
Proto: And if things go south, what then?
Direwolf: Then, we'll go with plan B: just let Godzilla attack the Russians.
Proto: Okay, that I can live with.
Cobalt: And as soon as we get this mission done, we'd need to go back and proceed with our primary objective.
Direwolf: That's in our schedule. We have ten days to return home. Meeting adjourned.
At night, Saber is looking out the window where he could see the ocean so far below. And there, he sees Godzilla following the Blue Typhoon.
Saber: There he is.
Harry: You mustn't think too harshly of your brother. He's only trying to protect you.
Saber: I know, but ever since our parents died, he's been going on and on about raising me, while at the same time, keeping me from going into the battlefield.
Harry: That's what everyone would do to keep his or her younger sibling from harm's way. And that is one of the motives the Kingsman must uphold. But… has he ever told you of what happened to your parents?
Saber: [pauses] Not really. He only told me it happened in sight, but… he never said what it was. I guess he… doesn't want to say it.
Harry: And he has every right to think he shouldn't. They died… by Maleficent's lightning. We have seen it, while we were visiting your world. I have enough evidence on her activities to have Maleficent locked up for the rest of her life… if the Dark Side of Disney wasn't at war with the Resistance.
Saber: So… it was Maleficent. But why wouldn't he-
Harry: That's something you'd have to ask yourself, Saber. Now we should get some rest. We'll be there at 7 am.
The next morning at Kharkiv, a Ukrainian soldier, Colonel Pravilov, is pacing around at a refugee settlement outside the ruined city, waiting for the Resistance to come. And then, he looks up to find the Blue Typhoon landing, and so many of the Ukrainian soldiers there cheer for their arrival. Nicholas walks on down the gangplank with the Resistance following him, and they greet the Colonel with salutes.
Nicholas: Colonel Pravilov.
Pravilov: At ease, Mr. Jakovina. And would this be the Resistance?
Direwolf: The very same. General John Curtis, AKA Direwolf, reporting for Russian-killing duty.
Pravilov: Splendid. We have been needing your assistance. Since you competed in the Olympics, we believe you could do the same for Ukraine.
Direwolf: Yes, but our visit here is limited. We have to be here in ten days, and we'll be heading back to finish our plot with the Dark Side.
Pravilov: Understood. And today, I like to present to you all… the Fighting Irish, 96th regiment, and their supreme leader Major Angus McGinnis.
Right on cue, three dozen Irish men with slingshots, LPO-50 flamethrowers, ArmaLite AR-15, and HK G3 sniper rifles march out from the ruins in two single files, before they halt in a stop. Then, Major McGinnis comes out, and grows a smile when he sees Cobalt.
Angus: Dieter.
Cobalt: Angus.
The two of them laugh as they hug, as if they know each other.
Angus: Oh, I haven't seen you since you were a little lad. I'm so glad that my old friend's grandson still lives to fight.
Cobalt: Well, you knew my grandpa. He'd fight until death, and it's in the Wilson bloodline.
Angus: [laughs]
Proto: Wait, you know this guy?
Cobalt: Angus McGinnis was a friend of my grandfather's, and one of the first who showed him the Isekai Door.
Angus: And when I was told about this Resistance fighting the Dark Side of Disney, I had a feeling it would be Harold's grandson assisting them with his expertise of Walt Disney Pictures.
Direwolf: Yeah, that's him.
Pravilov: Gentlemen, I hate to disrupt you, but we have a mission to accomplish.
Direwolf: The plan's been decided, Colonel. We'll infiltrate behind enemy lines, hit 'em really hard, and if things go south, we send in the big guns. But we need to know where it is.
Angus: Some of my men have found a warehouse that was used as a Russians' weapons storage. They've taken control of it, but readings show five signals heading their way.
Direwolf: It could be the Russians. Captain?
Cobalt: Yes, sir.
Direwolf: Go with the Irish to intercept, and take your troops with you.
Act Four
So far away in the ruined city, five Russian soldiers infiltrate a warehouse that the Irish conquered. On top of the building, an Irish sniper spots them and downs one of the Russians with his HK G3 sniper rifle. The sniper fires at another Russian, who runs behind a tree and avoids the shot. He tries to shoot the Russian man behind the tree, but misses again. A Russian sniper sets up his Dragunov sniper rifle. He shoots, killing the gunman and knocking him off the rooftop. He signals to the others that it is now clear to enter the building.
One of them opens the door and is met with gunfire from two AR-15 Armalites. He fires back with his AK74 carbine and ducks for cover behind drum barrels inside the door. Another Russian soldier gives him covering fire from the entrance. The Russian on point shoots upward, engaging an Irishman who tries to shoot back, but his Armalite malfunctions.
Irish: I'm jammed! Fan out! Fall back!
With the Irish retreating, the leading Russian calls for his team to pursue the IRA.
Russian commander: [in Russian] After them!
As the two Irishmen run, a RGD-5 grenade explodes and kills one of them. The other manages to escape. Two Russians run after him. They stop to shoot, not realizing there is an armed nail bomb right behind them. The Irishman is hit, but stays on his feet. He detonates the nail bomb with a remote control, killing one of the Russian soldiers.
Russian: [in Russian] A nail bomb?! That is so IRA!
The other follows the Irishman's blood trail. He enters another building, AK74 at the ready. As he turns a corner, the Irishman jumps him, knocks the gun out of the Russian's hands and throws him against a pillar. The Irishman tries to punch him in the face, but the Russian elbows him in the side and applies a choke hold. He throws the Irishman to the floor and brings out his ballistic knife. The Irishman grabs his arm but is overpowered and stabbed in the face.
The Russian gets up, only to see a stream of fire shoot from the corner. He backs away in the face of an Irish advancing with an LPO-50 flamethrower. The Russian runs into a nearby room, which is a dead end. The Irishman sets fire to the entire room from the entrance, burning the Russian soldier to death. He nods in satisfaction and turns, to find a Saiga shotgun leveled at him. Terrified, the Irishman tries to bring his flamethrower to bear, then a laser beam fires on the Russian before he would shoot the Irishman. Then, Cobalt smashes his way through the wall, with McGinnis following him.
Irish: War Machine?
Cobalt: Nope. Captain Cobalt.
Angus: [to the Irishman] Hamish, report.
Hamish: Everyone else is dead, Major. I'm the last one.
Angus: Nothing to worry, lad. We're going to get you home.
But then, Cobalt hears a noise coming from outside. He pries open the door, to find dozens of Russian soldiers marching in.
Cobalt: Angus, get behind him.
The Russians fire their weapons, but Cobalt's War Machine suit protects him from all the blows, and Angus takes cover behind his back with Hamish. Cobalt fires back with his De-Atomizers and assault rifle mounted to his suit, simply killing off most of the Russians, but when he sees a T-72, armed and ready to fire, he is worried.
Cobalt: Son of a bitch.
Then, something smashes through the fence. It is the Tatra T815, aka the "The War Rig", from Mad Max Road Fury. The Major Squad and Fighting Irish are on top of it, firing at the T-72. During the fray, a single Irishman blows the main hatch, jumps in, destroys the troopers within, lays explosives, jumps out, and detonates the tank. And with that, everyone roars in cheer victoriously.
Angus: Well done, lads. But we still have a base camp to locate.
Proto: I got this one. I have a probe that can scan anything and trace where it's originated from.
Proto takes out a ball-shaped probe to scan the downed T-72, and he throws it up to levitate and locate a campsite half a mile away, which is their objective.
Proto: Found it.
In the base camp, the Russian troops are watching the attack on their monitor screen. Blasting the electrified fences with explosives, the troops, including the Major Squad and the Fighting Irish, quickly destroy all of the soldiers in sight. Three more roll in, but they are quickly defeated by Cobalt, who deflects their shots and throws Dragon Marauder against them. When the mission is accomplished, Direwolf comes in.
Cobalt: The base has been conquered, sir.
Direwolf: Good work.
Wolverine: Sir? We've got the commander.
Wolverine drags in the Russian commander of the base camp, who falls to his knees in plead.
Commander: I beg you for mercy. I have a wife and kids back home.
Direwolf: If you want to see your family again, I need you to deliver a video message for me.
All the way in the Kremlin, Vladimir Putin is pacing around in his office, waiting for any news from the battlefields in Ukraine. Then, his long-time confidant Defence Minister Sergei Shoigu enters the room with a salute.
Putin: [in Russian] Yes?
Shoigu: [in Russian] Mr. Putin, we have a video card from Kharkiv. It is addressed to you.
Putin grabs the DVD from Shoigu, which is the video card. He slots it into the DVD player, playing it on the TV screen mounted on the wall, and it shows Direwolf's face. It plays the message, with the subtitles translating it in Russian for him.
Direwolf: Vladimir Putin, if you're hearing this, let this be a good warning to you. I am General Direwolf of the Resistance, the same paramilitary challenging the Dark Side of Disney. Basically, we understand that you're angry like a horde of killer bees. Both you and your armies as you swarm Ukraine on its major cities. But invading Ukraine and annihilating everything in that country is a terrible idea. Nobody likes how you treated the Ukrainians when you attacked them without warning and without mercy when you forced them into evacuation. On behalf of the remaining people here and the refugees around the world, my regiment is ready to kick you sky high until this invasion is over entirely and completely, before your armies can drink another glass of Vodka and pee out yellow urine on Ukrainian soil. The whole world knows that you've become the next mass murderer since Adolf Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, Kim Kong-un, and Josef Stalin maybe. But all this has got to come to an end right away. We can fight your Russians for days until you can admit surrender. If not… then you'll and be renamed Vladimir Poopin!
And with that, the video chat ends. Putin is so furious, he throws a knife at the TV screen, destroying it.
Putin: Americans! If they want a fight, we'll give them one!
Act Five
Day after day, the Russians are sending in their troops to the occupied parts of Ukraine, but with help from the Resistance and the Fighting Irish, the Ukrainians are single-handedly defeating them and winning battles one by one. On the seventh day, the Resistance are in Mariupol, where they drive the War Rig on the highway. Cobalt is in the passenger's seat, where he opens a comm. link to contact Saber.
Cobalt: Rogue Leader to Rogue 2. Do you copy?
Saber: [through comm. link] Loud and clear. We're going through Sochi
Cobalt: What news do you have so far?
Saber: We've been trekking everywhere from Siberia to where we are right now, but we haven't found any leads about the Dark Side yet.
Cobalt: Got it clear. But keep searching. The General wants clear confirmations that there's no conspiracy of any kind. Over and out.
Saber is in the Sochi Arboretum with Harry, where they walk around to look around themselves.
Harry: It's a gorgeous spot, this place. I wouldn't like the result if Russia lost and the Americans would bomb it all.
Saber: I agree. Although I don't think they would just bomb it all like they did in Japan in World War 2.
Harry: There will be nothing going bad around here. As a Kingsman, it is my duty to maintain peace and harmony around the world. If there's a chance that anything disastrous may happen, we will prevent it.
And then, Saber sees something from afar that grabs his attention. He sees a toon figure covered with a hood that covers his face. With his glasses, Saber uses X-ray to see through the hood, and notices that the figure is Rasputin, the main antagonist of Anastasia.
Saber: Harry. Harry.
Harry: What is it?
Saber: Over there. It's Rasputin.
Harry looks ahead, seeing Rasputin heading into a mausoleum where it takes him to a darkened room.
Harry: Good eye. Let's see what he's up to.
Saber and Harry both followed Rasputin's path into the mausoleum, and they are staring at the darkness, which only has a dim light up ahead. They begin their trek inside, following the light, and they are in what appears to be an underground room. There is nobody in sight, not even Rasputin. But they hear voices coming from behind, and they hide behind a column.
Jafar's voice: Rasputin, so good to see you.
Saber looks behind the column, where he sees Jafar and Rasputin shaking hands to greet themselves.
Rasputin: Thank you for bringing me here.
Jafar: I am looking forward to what you and the others have to say.
Iago: But Jafar, you really think… he could pull this off? I mean, ain't he a corpse?
Rasputin: [scoffs] In a manner of speaking.
Then, Rasputin's nose falls out of his face and into Iago's clutches.
Iago: Whoa. Talk about having the nose for it.
Rasputin: This is worth it all.
Rasputin takes the nose and pops it back in place.
Rasputin: I just hope I can get promoted. I could feel Hades's dark forces that could help me keep myself together.
Jafar: That's why I've come.
Jafar and Rasputin take their leave to go somewhere, then Saber comes out of hiding with Harry following him.
Harry: So, the Romanovs' former mystic is siding with the Dark Side. But what would he mean by promotion?
Saber: I think I know why. If I remember, there is a secret organization called the Shadow Workers. They operate secret missions for the Dark Side, and they would get promoted members of the Top Ten… or if anyone from the Top Ten is killed.
Harry: I see. And since the Top Ten has three members left, there could be more of them to be selected. Let's go follow them.
Saber and Harry tiptoe their way the path Jafar took with Rasputin. They hear voices as they follow the path, and when the voices are getting clearer and louder, they take shelter behind pipelines. They peer in between the pipes to see Jafar and Rasputin talking to more villains: Ronan the Accuser from the Marvel Cinematic Universe, Colonel Miles Quaritch from Avatar, Obadiah Stane/Iron Monger from Iron Man, Johann Schmidt/Red Skull from Captain America: The First Avenger, and Poppy Adams from the Kingsman franchise. Even Darth Maul is with them.
Jafar: It is only a matter of time before we assist Maleficent with her constant problems with the Resistance.
Ronan: What about the cyborg? Who's been calling himself Proto? He foiled my plans to destroy Xandar. Has he been killed off? Because I won't be signing the promotion paper unless I have his head mounted on my wall.
Jafar: We can arrange it when it's over, Ronan.
Stane: With the new weapons I've been designing and building for you, we'd have the best army in the modern age.
Rasputin: Perhaps, but what I want to know if Maleficent truly needs us. With so many villains from your universe to serve you reduced over the years, it wouldn't be a plea for us if she didn't say she was desperate for our aid.
Iago: Yeah, that would be a first.
Jafar: There is no doubt, Maleficent is desperate. She's been recruiting the Top Ten to assist our commands over her growing armies, and right now… only three remain, including myself. She wants me to say that since there are empty spots for you all, the promotion will be signed and accepted, as long as you show motivation against the enemy.
Quaritch: I can get every RDA marine to fight 24/7.
Red Skull: HYDRA and all of its task forces are at your disposal, Jafar.
Poppy: The Golden Circle can specialize in chemical warfare.
Jafar: Good, very good. Lord Maul and the Kree Empire have pledged their support. And when their munitions are combined with yours, we shall have an army greater than any in existence. The Resistance will be overwhelmed, and the world will agree with any demands we make.
Harry: [to Saber/whispers] We should be going now.
Saber and Harry both take their leave, and Poppy looks back at the pipes to find nobody there.
Act Six
In the ruins of Kyiv, Hunter Steele and Gohan are riding on Shadow to patrol Paton Bridge in search for any hostiles or victims.
Shadow: What did Cobalt say?
Hunter: He says Saber hasn't seen anything related to Disney.
Shadow: Well, we haven't seen anything except ruins and more ruins. I just think we might be heading into the middle of nowhere.
Gohan: Maybe I could go check up the sky.
Gohan jumps on the Nimbus Cloud that just levitates next to Shadow, and he flies up into the air. But then, Hunter discovers something: a Spider-Man mask.
Hunter: Oh, hey, Shadow. Look at this.
Shadow: What? What is it?
Jumping off Shadow, Hunter gets on the ground to pick up the mask.
Shadow: A Spider-Man's mask?
Hunter: Some kid must've dropped this during the evacuation.
Shadow: Well, put it back. It could be full of germs or any part of Covid.
Hunter: Hey, it won't make me sick or spread the disease because we're toons.
Shadow: No, but it would disable our speeches. Remember?
Hunter: Relax, I've got a scanner.
Hunter takes out a hand-held device to scan the mask, and it reads negative readings of corona or any germ.
Hunter: It's clean. But hey.
Then, he puts the Spider-Man mask on his face, posing.
Hunter: How do I look?
Shadow: Like a buffoon trying to be a hero.
Hunter: What? I was thinking I could be like Spider-Man.
Shadow: Get serious. You're a Spider Rider, not- [pauses] Wait. Something's coming.
Suddenly, the bridge begins to rumble, and something smashes through it from underneath. Much to the surprise of both Hunter and Shadow, four mechanical tentacles break open a hole through the bridge, and Dr. Otto Octavius/Doctor Octopus (Alfred Molina) shows up. He looks at Hunter, who's still wearing the mask, thinking he's really Spider-Man.
Doc Ock: Hello, Peter.
Hunter: Uh…. Hi! Do I know you?
Doc Ock: What have you done with my machine?
Hunter: What machine?
Doc Ock: My fusion reactor. The power of the sun, in the palm of my hand. It's gone.
Hunter: Look, buddy, I think you're confusing me with someone else. But I'm not Peter and I don't know anything about a fusion-whatamacallit.
Doc Ock: You wanna play games? Catch!
Doc Ock picks up two cars and throws them at Hunter, who jumps back on Shadow before he jumps out of the way of the thrown cars.
Shadow: This is no game, Hunter. He means to kill you.
Hunter: Then let's get him.
Shadow charges in to attack, and Doc Ock fights with his robotic arms to throw pieces of debris at the Battle Spider to send him away. Using his webs to swing around, Shadow avoids the villain's blows. When one debris piece is thrown, Hunter carries his Axial Pike like a baseball bat.
Hunter: Batter up!
He hits the piece and it redirects back at Doc Ock's robot arms, cascading to smash into a city bus. Groaning in fury, Doctor Octopus carries the bus and throws it at Shadow, enough to pin him to the ground.
Shadow: Hunter, the Oracle Key
Hunter: I got it. Oracle-
But then, when Hunter carries an Oracle Key, a thrown debris knocks it out of his hand.
Doc Ock: Should've killed your girlfriend when I had the chance.
Meanwhile, Direwolf is pacing in a basecamp tent, waiting for any reports, until he gets a distress call from Hunter through a radio.
Hunter: [through radio] General! Code red alert!
Direwolf: Hunter? I read you. What's the situation?
Hunter: It's some octopus-guy. Metal tentacles and shades. We're in Paton Bridge and-
[static]
Direwolf: Hunter? What's happening? Hunter Steele? [pauses] "Octopus guy with… shades?" [gasps] OCTAVIUS!
Back in Paton Bridge, Hunter uses only his Axial Pike to parry and fight off Doc Ock's robotic arms, until one of them grapples onto him.
Doc Ock: Think your new weapon would save you?
He throws Hunter around in the air, and slams him to the ground. With that, Doc Ock gets his opportunity to remove the mask. But he is confused as he realized this was not Peter Parker. He brings Hunter close to him as he removes his shades.
Doc Ock: You're not Peter Parker.
Hunter: I tried to tell you. My name is Hunter Steele.
Then, Gohan shows up on the Nimbus Cloud and kicks Doc Ock away, sending him flying off into a building.
Gohan: You okay?
Hunter: Yeah, thanks. But help me get this bus off of Shadow.
Hunter and Gohan both use all their strengths to lift the bus off of Shadow, which they succeed, and they hear noises coming from the building Doc Ock is thrown into.
Shadow: The key. Now's your chance to use it.
Hunter finds the Oracle Key he dropped on the ground, and he picks it up to use it at last.
Hunter: Oracle's Light!
And with that, Hunter and Shadow both gain power. Hunter's left shoulder pad grows larger; Shadow's two front legs grow more sturdy and his abdomen becomes more armored. When Doctor Octopus arrives to attack, Hunter shoots web from his left shoulder pad to stop him, but the mad scientist avoids it, and throws more debris at them. Gohan jumps up to attack, but the robotic arms grapple him to throw him away, allowing him to challenge Hunter and Shadow.
Doc Ock: Where is my machine?!
Hunter: I told you, I don't know!
Having enough, Doc Ock retracts a blade from one of his robotic arm and attempts to impale Hunter with it. But then, Shadow uses his speed and webbing to entangle Doc Ock in a cacoon, trapping him.
Shadow: Not even a mere Earthen can stop a great warrior like myself.
But then, Doc Ock breaks free from the trap, and grapples both Hunter and Shadow out once. Also, Doctor Octopus removes a piece of Shadow's armor and integrates it into his tentacles, which leaves him in awe.
Doc Ock: Nanotechnology. Rather impressive.
Hunter: Hey buddy, you have no idea what you're messing with.
Doc Ock: Do I? Because you can explain to me how cartoon characters can be real?
Shadow tries to break free from Doc Ock's tentacles, but he then gets a feeling.
Doc Ock: Wait. What's happening?
The integration of the Oracle's armor into the tentacles allows Shadow to use his armor to take control like a Bluetooth connection and turn them against Doctor Octopus. The arms, and by extension Octavius, are not thrilled to be under the control of this strange creature, so Octavius attempts to attack Shadow with his bare hands, to which Shadow responds by ordering one of the arms to restrain Otto. Shadow even makes them release him and Hunter.
Hunter: [amazed] Shadow, how are you doing that?
Shadow: I don't know. I guess… when he integrated some of my armor, I've… taken control of them.
Hunter: [to comm. link] General? False alarm. Shadow and I are both safe and secured, and… we've got a huge octopus.
Act Seven
Later, Octavius is in a glass container where he can't escape. Cobalt, Proto and Direwolf are watching him in shock, as Hunter stands with them.
Cobalt: And you captured him when you… needed backup?
Hunter: Yeah, I did. But, uh…. Well, I thought I did, until Shadow found a way to capture him.
Proto: But how?
Shadow: [through Hunter's manacle] I'm not sure how, but when he ripped off a piece of my Oracle armor, I somehow took control of his mechanical arms.
Cobalt: I'm surprised, though. Because those four tentacles have artificial intelligence, they have taken control of Otto's entire subconscious.
Direwolf: And still, Cobalt. Aren't you glad I formed the Anime Brigade?
Cobalt: Well… yeah. But to be honest, I was hoping Gohan would take care of this, until he was sent into the infirmary. And most importantly, how did he get here to begin with?
Proto: He seemed completely unaware of the background. It would be logical to say… he must've gone through an Isekai Door recently.
Direwolf: If that was true, we should know where it is.
Cobalt: I'll go talk to him. It would be better if I tell him the background first, and ask him where he came from.
Angus: You should let him tag along. No one knows your grandfather's story better than me.
In the container, Doc Ock is pacing around in his container, waiting for someone to just let him out, then he sees Cobalt walking to him with Angus at his side.
Doc Ock: Who are you? Most of all… where am I?
Cobalt: Dr. Octavius, you must relax. My name is Dieter Wilson. I'm with a paramilitary called the Resistance. This may be a shock to you, but you're currently… in another world.
Doc Ock: Another world? As in… another dimension? But how?
Cobalt: You may have been summoned here by someone. Through the Isekai Door.
Doc Ock: The what?
Angus: A portal between dimensions that took you here from either TV shows or movies.
Doc Ock: A portal? As in magic? What is this, a birthday party? Where is the clown?
Cobalt: Calm it down, for a minute.
Doc Ock: Don't tell me to calm down! I was on the verge of building a new energy source that would change the world, and I had so many delays. Spider-Man was trying to stop my fusion reactor, so I stopped him. I had him, by the throat! And then I…. [pauses] …and then I was here.
Angus: So… you already knew Peter Parker was Spider-Man.
Doc Ock: Yes. [chuckles] Brilliant, but lazy.
Cobalt: Listen, you may not know what's happening around here, but you remember more than just how you ended up here. What do you remember?
Doctor Octopus pauses for a few seconds, and he begins to remember everything he saw and encountered before he fought Hunter in Paton Bridge.
Doc Ock: I was… standing outside. It was night… and it was snowing. I only saw… a glimpse of what was right in front of me. It looked like… an angel on a pillar holding a cross
Angus: I see. But is that all?
Doc Ock: That's all I can remember.
Later, Cobalt and Angus are back with the others to share what they've heard from Octavius.
Cobalt: That's all he's got to say. An angel with a cross on a pillar.
Direwolf: He might just be lying. We all know he's being controlled by those mechanical arms welding onto his back. They probably made him say things so they would escape.
Proto: There could be one way to find out. Hunter, you still have that Oracle Key?
Hunter: Got it right here.
Hunter gives Proto the Oracle Key, and he puts it into a printer where it scans it. Proto goes on a computer, pressing a series of buttons, and the screen shows a few scenes of what Doc Ock has seen.
Proto: The robotic tentacles are wired to his nervous system. Almost every part of the human body is wired to the brain, and since that piece of armor is integrated to his arms, we could use via Bluetooth connection to simply read his memory.
The screen shows when Doc Ock grappled Peter's neck, and the scene shifts to the gate with the angel-mounted pillar before it changes to that fight with Hunter on Paton Bridge. Proto rewinds it back a bit, and pauses to the angel.
Cobalt: That's an angel alright.
Angus: I believe I've seen that before. That's the Alexander Column. Here, let me show you.
Angus takes out his iPhone to show the others a picture of the column. He clicks on it to show the palace where it's located.
Angus: This is a picture of the column in Palace Square, which is also the main entrance to the Winter Palace in St. Petersburg.
Direwolf: So the Isekai Door is in Russian… behind enemy lines. If that's the case, Putin would've summoned others from the media to stand against us and Ukraine.
Hunter: But maybe there's more. The doc-guy said he's missing that machine of his. If Vladimir Putin's the one who put him here, maybe he did the same thing with that thing.
Proto: Is he crazy? The fusion reactor gets its power from tritium. If he activates it, he'll destroy the city including the people that lived there.
Direwolf: Then we'll have to stop him. We all know he invaded Ukraine, but we cannot just let him kill his own people who may be innocent. Cobalt, Proto, you two will go to St. Petersburg to stop Putin, and take Octavius with you. And while you're gone, I'll have the Anime Brigade to patrol the streets.
Cobalt & Proto: Yes, sir!
Back in Sochi, Saber and Harry are taking shelter in a condominium, where they can try to make contact with the others.
Harry: It's no good. It seems our communication's been jammed when we snuck into that secret meeting. It is likely to believe that we may be on our own.
Saber: Cobalt is not going to like it when he hears about this.
Harry: Well, we can always do it the old fashion way. When the agency doesn't hear from my report, they'll send a rescue team to go find me. So, for the time being, we stay put.
All of a sudden, there is a creaking noise coming from the door. Saber and Harry stand firm and ready to fight, as the creaking grows louder and louder, but it stops.
Saber: [whispers] You hear that?
Harry: [whispers] Yes, that was a creak.
Suddenly, the door is smashed open. Poppy's robotic attack dogs Bennie and Jet enter the room, barking like dogs, and Poppy herself enters.
Poppy: Oh, nononono. It's a very naughty habit to sneak up on people, especially in their meetings.
Saber: You'll never succeed in making us fail our missions.
Poppy: [giggles] I'd like to think otherwise. [whistles]
By her whistling command, the robot dogs attack Saber and Harry, who jump onto the counter to avoid themselves from being killed. But Saber has a brilliant plan. He takes out the Porta-Shrinker and zaps the two robotic dogs to shrink into the size of ants, and steps on them to crush them.
The shocked Poppy tries to take her leave, but Harry fires a stun dart at her neck, and she gets tasered until she drops down.
Harry: The Porta-Shrinker?
Saber: I always carry it with me… just in case of emergencies.
Harry: Very resourceful. You might make a fine Kingsman, if you are interested.
Outside, Rasputin sees what happened in there through the window, and he isn't upset.
Rasputin: Well… it looks like I have to deal with the others now.
He holds up his prized possession: a reliquary. He uses it to summon his minions to do his bidding.
Rasputin: Go. Seek out our bold and foolish hero, and lead him to his doom.
Act Eight
The following morning, a train, with an engine blowing its whistle, and carrying Cobalt, Proto, Angus and Octavius, chugs through the beautiful snow covered Russian countryside. The mighty locomotive is plowing up huge furrows of snow as it steams toward its intended destination. Inside the train, Cobalt and the others are inside the baggage car. Doc Ock's tentacles are offline because he has a restraining bolt from Star Wars attached to the harness, and he's cuffed.
Doc Ock: This place is more complicated than I imagined. First, you tell me that after this portal was found, and movies could be wired to it, so now you coexist with cartoon characters?
Cobalt: Yeah. However, that title has changed to "toons". And for the rest of us, we're categorized as live-action characters, or… li-acs for short.
Doc Ock: "Li-acs"? Hah! I've heard better names than that. And around here, aside from your war against this Dark Side, there's also a pandemic of a respiratory disease, and now a Russian invasion? But is it you're going to do with me, hmmm? Simply put me under arrest and drag me along like some dog?
Proto: We could always cut off your mechanical arms to keep the voices in your head silent. But instead of that, we were thinking about doing it without the need of cutting. Since you had an inhibitor chip that's supposed to protect your higher brain function from the arms' AI, I could just make a new one, and it'll be done by the time we get to St. Petersburg.
Angus: Proto, it's ready.
Proto and Angus take their leave to the other end of the baggage car, leaving Cobalt alone with Doc Ock.
Doc Ock: I should ask another question. Your name, Dieter. It's a German name, and you don't look German. Not even your last name.
Cobalt: It happens a lot. I was named after the Nazi who spared my grandfather's life when he was a boy, and who saved the Eastern Seaboard.
Doc Ock: And you once said it was he who discovered the Isekai Door. But it makes me wonder why you weren't feeling like you should lead this Resistance.
Cobalt: Because it wasn't my call. My grandpa made his discovery, and it brought many characters from everyone's TV and movies they liked. He would've been as popular as the US President, but he chose to live like the rest of us: a common family man, and someone who would… stabilize law and order between all worlds.
Doc Ock: Well… I'd say he sounds like a great man, but if it was up to me, I would think otherwise. Which is one of the reasons why I built my fusion reactor.
Cobalt: "Safe, renewable, and cheap energy", as you described before. But if you continue with this, things can get out of hand.
Doc Ock: I had it under control. The precious tritium needed to be stabilized in order to fulfill my dreams. That's why I rebuilt and enlarged the containment field.
Cobalt: Maybe you haven't learned it, but true success never comes from submitting casualties. That's something Putin should've learned.
Meanwhile, crashing through brittle limbs, as they navigate their way toward the train and the suspecting travelers, Rasputin's minions catch up with the train, and as they rocket beneath the train and the engine, the green minions leave a wake of flames on the tracks behind them. The minions, being tiny little green demons, crawl all over the train engine and enter its boiler, and when it starts to overheat, the engine glows red, speeds up, and rattles as if it is about to fall apart.
Back in the baggage car, Proto is working on a new inhibitor chip to replace the damaged one Octavius has, with Angus shining a light for him.
Angus: How is it going?
Proto: Just a few more adjustments, and…. We should be….
Suddenly, an explosion caused by Rasputin's minions has just separated the runaway locomotive and the baggage car from the dining car and coaches. The result makes the four of them lose their balance; even Proto drops the chip he nearly finished.
Cobalt: The hell was that?!
Angus: I don't know, but there goes the dining car!
Proto: The chip's gone! Angus, help me find it.
Octavius goes to the front window, peers at the engine and sees sparks raining down.
Doc Ock: Holy shit.
Cobalt: What now?
Doc Ock: I think someone's set the train on fire.
The other three move forward and see that the engine is blowing smoke and fire over the coal tender.
Angus: This can't be good. A speeding train could lead to a disaster.
Doc Ock: Let me see it. My arms are impervious to heat and magnetism. I could check it out, if you activate one of them.
Angus: And you would use them to escape or crush us as well.
Proto: I got this.
Proto uses his left wrist to activate one of Doc Ock's tentacles. It extends out the door, around the tender, and inside the engine room, only to find no one driving the burning train engine.
Doc Ock: No drivers? What if we just jump?
After Proto deactivates the tentacle, Angus opens the side door revealing that they are moving across a bridge.
Doc Ock: Never mind that. We can just uncouple the car.
Under the carriage, on hearing this, the minions weld the coupling of the car so it cannot disconnect. Cobalt jumps onto the coupling and begins working the connection, by trying to cut it with Dragon Marauder. Although the blade is made of Vibranium, the welded coupling is impervious, then Doc Ock has his robotic arms activated to help break the coupling, but it is true strong.
Cobalt: Come on! There's gotta be something we have better than metal!
Proto: [realizing] Oh yeah. Acid bombs!
Proto's right cyborg leg pops out a rectangular bomb and he throws it at the coal tender, before Cobalt and Doc Ock take cover behind crates.
Doc Ock: Acid bombs?
A little boom from the bomb sprays acid between both cars, eating the welded coupling, and the acid evaporates in a matter of seconds. The minions look back and see the baggage car has separated. They race off ahead of the train, towards the bridge and destroy it in a flash of green fire.
Back in the baggage car, not too far from the speeding engine, Cobalt and Proto put out the flames as Angus turns the brake wheel.
Angus: The brakes are out!
Proto: Turn harder!
Then, the wheel comes off in Agnus's hands.
Angus: Don't worry, if we have plenty of tracks, this car will slow down for us.
Cobalt: Uh, guys? Our track ends!
Looking ahead, the gang sees the engine and the baggage car are in collision course with the broken bridge.
Doc Ock: Proto, free this bolt from me. It's our only hope.
Since Proto is out of options, he presses the button on his wrist, activating all four of the tentacles. Doc Ock uses his lower ones to grapple the carriage, and the upper ones to grab one railroad tie. They instantly pull but the tie, then dozens more, until Octavius loses his grip when he is slipped out. Cobalt jumps in to grab him, pulled by Proto and Angus, and they are all pulled out of the baggage car, landing and rolling onto the tracks, until they end up into the snow.
The overheated train engine and the ruined baggage car both plunge off the broken bridge, crash, and ignite into fireballs with an enormous explosion when they hit the bottom. Everyone sees that, and are thrilled by that event. And Doc Ock finds out that the restraining bolt's been damaged, fulling off of his harness.
Angus: Good Lord, that was thrilling!
Proto: [groaning in pain] I think I've got a thorn in my ass! Jesus!
Doc Ock: [to Cobalt; stunned] Why'd you do that? You could've died… trying to save me.
Cobalt: That's what you do in a team. You look out for each other.
Doc Ock: [pauses] Brave you really are, Captain. And yet… so naïve.
Now he has full control of his tentacles, Doctor Octopus grabs Cobalt, Proto and Angus by the necks, ready to strangle them all.
Cobalt: [relaxed] Otto…. Didn't you once speak to Peter about intelligence? It wasn't a privilege, it was a gift to be used for the good of mankind. You can't listen to those machines. They're turning you into something you're not.
Doc Ock: Why would you care?
Cobalt: Is this… what Rosie would want?
When he hears that, Doctor Octopus widens his eyes. He remembers the time when he activated his first machine, and the magnetic field killed his wife Rosie, before the result also damaged his inhibitor chip. Because of him remembering it, he sheds a tear in loss.
Doc Ock: My Rosie's dead. She's… gone.
Cobalt: Not they way you thought. We all know about death. We've kept wishing it never happened, but once you loved someone… they find a special place in your heart. In a way… you won't feel alone, for you are still part of each other.
Octavius is moved by Cobalt's speech, as the fourth robotic limb screeches to forget about it.
Doc Ock: My…. My dream. It was my dream… to change the world.
Cobalt: We all feel the same. But sometimes… to do what's right we have to be steady, and give up the thing we want the most…. Even our dreams.
[five second silence]
Doc Ock: You're right.
[tentacles screeches]
Doc Ock: No. He's right. Listen…. Listen to me now. Listen to ME now!
With all his might and intellect, Octavius is able to get the tentacles to follow him and release the others. Then, Proto finds the chip he was working on at the railroad.
Proto: The chip. And it's intact. I gotta hurry.
He takes the chip and walks around to put it on Otto. After he grabs him by the head, Doctor Octopus has his new chip installed to his neck, but loses consciousness for a few seconds, until Octavius regains consciousness in a panic, but realizes that he can't hear the voices inside his head anymore. Through this realization that he remembers again, Octavius was on the verge of tears of having control over his mind again.
Doc Ock: Dieter…. Thank you. And you, Seamus.
Cobalt: It's all over, Otto. Time we get our morality in place.
Octavius nods his head in agreement, before a spotlight shines upon the whole gang. It turns out to be the Blue Typhoon hovering overhead, and the light hauls them in like a tractor beam, taking them all inside. They are in the cockpit, where Direwolf greets them.
Direwolf: So, how'd it go?
Doc Ock: You could've… just flown us to St. Petersburg?
Direwolf: [smugly] Well… I knew Proto would repair your invention, but I didn't want it on this ship.
Doc Ock: [chuckles] Okay, I get it.
Cobalt: But now… we have to get there-
Saber: [through speakers] Rogue 2 to Rogue Leader, do you read?
That call comes from Cobalt's War Machine suit in his wrist. He clicks on it to respond.
Cobalt: Saber? I read you. What's your position?
Saber: We've made a discovery. The Dark Side's in Russia, and it's the Shadow Workers.
Doc Ock: Shadow Workers?
Proto: Secret combat unit, under the Dark Side's command.
Cobalt: [to Saber] Can you give us your current location?
Saber: Yeah, we're at the northeast edge of Sochi.
Cobalt: Okay, listen up. We may have more leads. We're with Doctor Octopus and he claims his machine is in St. Petersburg. We gotta get there ASAP.
Saber: Copy that. We're on our way. Over and out.
Doc Ock: So… we're going to kick some ass?
Cobalt: I was wondering if you're… interested in joining us.
Doc Ock: Yes. [smugly] Yes, I am.
Act Nine
In St. Petersburg, Saber and Harry both enter the Winter Palace by walking under the Building of the General Staff, where they see the whole place is deserted.
Harry: Well, this is a fancy place.
Saber: You know, if I'm right, they should be arriving right… now.
Right on cue, the spotlight from the Blue Typhoon overhead shines next to the two, and the tractor drops down Cobalt, Proto, Doc Ock and the Fighting Irish to the ground.
Cobalt: Just in time.
Harry: I see you've reformed Dr. Otto Octavius to our side. Quite a noble deed you've committed, Captain.
Octavius looks around at the Winter Palace, and he sees something that grabs his attention: the fusion reactor. Stunned, he walks over to it in awe, but as he gets closer, the machine seems to be enlarged, bigger than how he built it. Cobalt comes over to see it himself.
Cobalt: It's not on, so we're safe.
Doc Ock: Something's not right. It's bigger than how I built it. Even with the money I stole to build it… it wouldn't be enough. But… I remember I was right here… before I was in Ukraine.
Cobalt is looking at the reactor in thought, then he is thinking about everything he's seen and heard since his encounter with Octavius. And then, he has a theory.
Cobalt: Maybe… you were brought here… through possession.
Doc Ock: What do you mean?
Cobalt: The train…. The bridge…. I've seen all this before… made by someone from so long ago. Who hated this place because of the family who died here. A man was thought to be holy, but he was a fraud… power-mad… and dangerous.
And then, someone shows up. Rasputin. A silhouette in the moonlight. Hunched over. Atrophied. Holding the glowing reliquary. He steps closer.
Cobalt: [glaring] Rasputin.
Doc Ock: [baffled] Grigori Rasputin?
Cobalt: [to Rasputin; angrily] How dare you set foot on these grounds!
Rasputin: How dare I? I am Russian-born.
Cobalt: Russian-born? Ha! You're a sinner, a traitor to all mankind! You have no place here or anywhere else!
Rasputin: You think you can banish the great Rasputin?! By the unholy powers vested in me, I banish you with a curse! Mark my words! You will never find the chosen one who will vanquish the Dark Side! WE WILL NOT REST UNTIL EVERYTHING GOES OUR WAY FOREVER!
He shoots down a General Staff Building with his reliquary and it explodes. Cobalt draws Dragon Marauder to strike him, but Rasputin blasts him and Doc Ock away with his reliquary. Rasputin walks over to the fusion reactor, blasts his reliquary in there to form a giant green energy ball, and it activates the machine.
Proto: We have to stop him!
Angus: Fighting Irish… charge!
The Fighting Irish charge in with their roars, then Iron Monger jumps over the Winter Palace and shoots them with his minigun and rocket launcher, preventing them from getting close to the machine.
Meanwhile, Putin and Shoigu are watching aerial footage of the battle in St. Petersburg.
Shoigu: This is our chance to drop a nuclear-
Putin: No. With any luck, they will destroy each other.
Back in St. Petersburg, with a wave of his hands, Rasputin summons a few of his minions from the reliquary in the fusion reactor, and they attack a few of the Fighting Irish who escaped Iron Monger's firepower.
Cobalt and Doc Ock are buried under the rubble, until Saber, Proto and Harry arrive to remove them off, and help them regain their bearings.
Doc Ock: So many characters from so many movies. Even historical figures?
Cobalt: You'd be surprised how many toons were based on real-life people.
Octavius looks at the fusion reactor, channeling its power from the reliquary's power.
Doc Ock: That thing. Where I… used to put in the tritium. That item's doing the same, but it's not energy.
Cobalt: No, but this is still bad. When it's finished, it'll destroy the city.
Harry: This must've been Rasputin's plan. He cursed the Romanovs to their deaths, and the Winter Palace is a reminder of them.
Doc Ock: Dieter, you must tell me. How do we stop Rasputin?
Cobalt is trying to figure out something that can stop Rasputin, but when he peers at the reliquary in Rasputin's grip, he remembers something.
Cobalt: That reliquary. He sold his soul for it.
Doc Ock: But it is magic… right?
Cobalt: Yes. And he traded his soul for it, then his very existence depends on it.
Doc Ock: Then…. [realizing] He can't live without it. It has to be destroyed.
Cobalt unsheathes Dragon Marauder to get ready, but Doc Ock halts him with his robotic arm.
Doc Ock: I'll do it. These arms were built for the reactor's area. I can distract him and send him away until I grab it.
[five second silence]
Cobalt: Alright. The rest of us will deal with Stane. Proto, it's time for Plan B.
Proto: Got it.
Cobalt: Team…. CHARGE!
Cobalt makes the lead to attack Iron Monger. When Iron Monger sees them, he fires his minigun at them, until Cobalt makes a high jump with rocket thrusters and slashes Dragon Marauder to destroy the weapon. During that, Proto presses on his hand and it lets out Godzilla's roar that is a signal.
Iron Monger: Impressive, but not good enough.
With his suit's strength, he punches Cobalt away into the Winter Palace itself.
Rasputin: How bold of you. Fighting the dark forces… FOR THE LAST TIME!
Rasputin fires his reliquary. A swarm of minions blast right over the team, and right onto the damaged General Staff Building.
Rasputin: You'll get a kick out of this!
With the minions possessing the rubble, the west side of the General Staff Building changes into a towering golem made of bricks and cement.
Saber: [stunned] That's a new one.
Proto: Fan out!
The golem attacks the team, roaring and swinging its arms. Saber and the others struggle to roll away, until they hear a roar, which is familiar.
Saber: [thrilled] Godzilla!
With a mighty roar, Godzilla rises from the palace embankment and attacks the golem, saving the team. Rasputin is about to use the reliquary again, until he is pushed away to the ground, then he whips back to see Doc Ock challenging him.
Doc Ock: Surprised?
Rasputin: [furious] I should've known li-acs wouldn't have the guts to kill you!
Doc Ock: It's all over, wizard. That's my machine you're toying with.
Rasputin: Well, since it has the power to destroy a city, I thought this palace would be the first. The despicable loyals who lived here should never leave anything behind.
Doc Ock: Oh, I'd think otherwise. Let's talk, ugly.
Rasputin summons minions to attack, and Doc Ock counters with his tentacles, starting their duel.
Meanwhile, Iron Monger searches inside the Winter Palace to find his target, until Cobalt then surprises him and jumps on his back, attacking Iron Monger. Iron Monger then eventually furiously rips Iron Man off his back, throwing him across the hall. He grabs a column, and uses it to strike Cobalt before he throws him to the imperial staircase.
Iron Monger: It's been fourteen years since I was defeated by Tony Stark, but I've managed to learn from my mistakes. This promotion is bound to be a promising statement for me, and nothing's going to stand in my way. Not even… you.
Iron Monger then fired at the stairs with his rocket, causing a massive explosion there, but Cobalt rolls away to avoid it. Cobalt fires his wrist-mounted assault rifle, but it's bullets are no match for Stane's suit, until he fires his tri-barrel De-Atomizer, which is enough to blow Iron Monger away. He charges in again with Dragon Marauder, until Iron Monger quickly recovers to grab Cobalt's arm, hoisting him up. Removing his own protective helmet, Stane carries Cobalt right to his face.
Stane: You're truly a crusader, Dieter, but swords are so stone-aged and my suit's become more advanced than it ever was.
Cobalt: How'd you know you have Vibranium?
Stane: "Vibranium"?
And then, Cobalt stabs his sword through the armor and into Stane's chest, which begins to kill him. He frees himself from his captive, and watches Iron Monger fall down to the ground.
Back outside, Rasputin and Doc Ock are still fighting, until Rasputin fires a stream at Octavius, throwing him to the fusion reactor. He looks back to see Godzilla being overpowered by the brick golem.
Rasputin: Dasvidanya, king of the monsters.
Then Saber steps through the smoke, much to Rasputin's shock
Saber: Right, I couldn't have said it better myself!
Saber lunges at Rasputin, butting him head-on. They fall to the ground and struggle to grasp the reliquary, which rolls across the floor. Rasputin grabs it and shoots a stream of minions at Saber. He tumbles backwards. Suddenly, one of Doc Ock's tentacles grabs the reliquary from his hand. The minions around Saber dissipate into smoke.
Rasputin: [gasps]
Now he has it, Doc Ock's claws tighten the reliquary, cracking it, and the background turns blood red. The energy ball in the fusion reactor begins to disappear, and the machine itself self-destructs. The brick golem suddenly crumbles to pieces, and Godzilla fires his atomic breath to finish it off.
Doc Ock: Dieter was right. This is your source of power.
Doc Ock starts crushing the reliquary with all of his tentacles. Rasputin leaps for it.
Rasputin: Give it back! I'll tear you to pieces!
Doc Ock: And I… will not die a monster!
One last crush in the tentacles' claws, the reliquary shines a bright light until it explodes, destroying the claws and blasting both men apart. Rasputin cowers in fear as the minions circle around him, and a huge energy beam blasts him. As Rasputin screams in agony, his skin glows. It shimmers. Then it starts to melt off him, leaving nothing but a rattling, screaming skeleton. The skeleton cracks, unhinges, the skull keeps screaming. The bones fall apart and crumble to dust as the minions fly away, and the dust starts blowing away in the wind.
Act Ten
With that, the battle is over and everyone cheers in victory as Cobalt walks out of the palace to see they've won.
Cobalt: Did we… win already?
Saber: Yeah. Ock just…. [realizing] Octavius!
Cobalt and Saber both rush over to Octavius, laying next to his ruined machine.
Cobalt: Octavius?
Doc Ock: [coughs; weakly] Dieter…. Is it… over?
Saber: Yes. You…. You saved the city, and the lives who live here.
Cobalt: Hang in there, Ock. I'll call a medic to pick you-
Doc Ock: No. [softly] I don't need help. You already have. You were right… about everything. I… wanted this. Just…. Let me tell Rosie… you said hi.
And finally, Doc Ock draws his last breath, ready to die.
Cobalt: Otto?
But it's no use. Doctor Octopus dies of his wounds, but he dies a hero, and all Cobalt can do is bow his head in respect, which he and Saber do together.
Back in Moscow, Putin is still watching St. Petersburg on TV, and he switches it off as he becomes deep in thought about everything he's seen.
Putin: [to Shoigu] Tell our troops to let the invaders be. They protected the last Czar's final resting place, and we should owe them.
Shoigu: Yes, sir.
The tenth day arrives for the Resistance to fight alongside the Ukrainians. The Blue Typhoon is being loaded with cargo, ready for departure, and Cobalt stands at Nicholas's side to watch the process.
Nicholas: Are you sure about leaving?
Cobalt: A deal's a deal, Nicholas. We agreed to stay here for ten days, and that's what we all agreed upon. We wanted to make sure Putin wasn't conspiring with the Dark Side, and it's been proven wrong. But we promised you that only a few of us were chosen to stay. And personally, for me… most of them were in the Anime Brigade.
Nicholas: Truth to be told, I am surprised you protected a Russian city.
Cobalt: Mr. Jakovina, we may be fighting for whatever's left of Ukraine, there's no reason to think we could storm any of Russia's cities. Not when there are so many innocent people.
Nicholas: I understand.
Direwolf, Proto, Saber, Harry and Angus all walk over to Cobalt, having a discussion to give him.
Proto: Cobalt? We've got something to say.
Direwolf: Proto has told me everything about what happened since you got on that train. While he was working on a new chip, you had a chance to reason with Doctor Octopus… or Octavius, in case of fact. That actually was a valorous move.
Harry: Yes. Congratulations, Captain.
Direwolf: And this calls for something awesome. I've been thinking about doing this for years, but it looks like… this is the time. In honour of your courage, motivation, reasoning, strategy and scholarship against evil toons and corrupt li-acs, I hereby award you… the Silver Badge.
While talking, Direwolf takes out a silver badge and puts it around Cobalt's neck like a medal. Cobalt looks at it, seeing it has the word "Colonel".
Direwolf: You are now second-in-command of the Resistance… Colonel.
Cobalt, honoured with a smile, salutes to Direwolf, and the General salutes back.
Direwolf: Congratulations, soldier.
Cobalt: Thank you, sir. But… I was expecting Proto to be second-in-command.
Proto: Nah! I'd prefer keeping my title as lieutenant… for now, anyway.
Later, it is nearly time for departure, and Cobalt gives a farewell to Angus.
Angus: You take care of yourself, Dieter.
Cobalt: You as well, Angus. And… if you're ever in Florida, feel free to visit us.
And then, Cobalt and Angus hug each other.
Angus: Your grandfather would be very proud of you, lad.
Meanwhile, Saber gives his farewell to Harry, shaking hands with each other.
Saber: Do you really have to go?
Harry: I'm afraid I must. I've informed the agency about how successful my mission was, and I have to go back for, perhaps, another assignment. I would like to say that you could be a new Kingman, but you're needed in the Resistance more than anywhere else.
Saber: Yeah, you may be right.
Harry: However, I'd like you to keep the suit. It will protect you.
And now, Saber follows the others to get onboard the Blue Typhoon. Now it is loaded, the starship hovers up from the ground, with all the Ukrainians waving goodbye to them, and the Resistance are on their way to return home to deal with the Dark Side of Disney.
The End