"Min, wait" I shout as I leave the room after her. But she's gone.
Damn! I've royally screwed this up.
"Everything okay Mom?" Rose asks, coming out from the library. I quickly wiped my tears and put a smile on my face "sure, sweetheart. Are you and Hugo ready to go?"
She nods at me. "Well let's go then." We walk out to the apparition point when Hugo asks "Is Minerva not coming?" The question is like a stab through my heart. "No, bumblee, she has a few things to do today" I grab a hand each and turn on the spot.
We appear just on the outskirts of the burrow, the kids run ahead eager to see their grandma and grandpa again. I walk slowly, I'm so confused. This morning started so well, and then it all fell apart so quickly. I can't stop it, it's like grains of sand falling through the crevices, as they aren't in a solid enough container. I push open the door to the kitchen and walk inside. I'm surprised, although I shouldn't be, to see Harry and Ginny still here. They must have stayed over. I give them both a hug in greeting. Molly enters the kitchen after getting the kids settled in the den.
"Is everything okay Hermione, dear? You left so abruptly yesterday, and if you don't mind me saying you look awful" she announces as she walks over to me. She pulls me into her embrace and I burst into tears. I hug her back, so tightly, as I weep openly in front of her for the first time since we were at the hospital. She does her best to comfort me, and I can hear someone putting the kettle on and levitating some cups from their place in the cupboard.
"Oh, Molly" I sigh "everything is such a mess"
She finally let's the hug go, wipes my tears and says, "Come now, let's have a spot of tea and talk it out. I'm sure we can get things sorted" she leads me over to a chair at the table, and I gratefully sink onto it. I grab the cup that is placed in front of me and warm my hands on the porcelain. I can feel three pairs of eyes staring at me waiting for me to start. But I don't know where to start.
"When Ron and I got together, we were so happy, and my future was everything that I wanted it to be, at least in the beginning." I start, not looking up from the table, this conversation is going to upset everyone present, but I have to talk about it. "We got married, moved in together. Decided to start a family. But then things changed. Ron became controlling, wanting to know where I was all the time, not letting me out to see friends unless he was with me, once Rose came along, it got worse. He stopped me from seeing Minerva after Roses 1st birthday. He never really told me why, anytime I asked he would just get angry and then leave to get drunk" I admit shamefully. I take a sip of the tea, wishing it was something stronger. "Minerva recently shared with me what happened, and I will get to that in a moment, but first I want you to understand what my life had become since having Rose and then Hugo" I dart my eyes up, I see a frown on Mollys face, Ginny looks lost and Harry, dear sweet Harry he has only support radiating from his gaze. I take that support and I tell them everything. Every last detail, Rons spending habits, the arguing and fighting, the fact that I realised a few days before the funeral that I hadn't been in love with Ron for a long time, the letter I received from Minerva, her confession. How I've felt since Ron passed, how Minerva has been helping the kids and I with our grief, how I'm falling in love with her. As these words leave my lips I hear gasps from around the table. Molly has tears running down her face, her hand to her mouth. Ginny is looking at me like I have betrayed her, even Harry is looking a little confused.
"But Rons only been dead a week, and you're telling me that you are in love with Minerva already?" Molly fumes.
Harry jumps to my defence "Molly, please. Think about it. When was the last time you saw Hermione truly happy, laugh, or even smile, when the kids weren't present?" He asks her. I can see her thinking, filtering through memories, dismissing each one in turn. "Hugos birth?" She questions, as if even she is unsure about that.
"And did you ever get to see Hermione and the children without Ron being present?" He follows up. Again Molly thinks about all the times we have been over, but I never once came on my own, without Ron, not since I'd had the kids. I used to come over all the time just to chat and get a lovely meal after I finished my final year at Hogwarts. "No" she admits finally "that doesn't give her the right to move on so quickly" she's determined to hold on to her anger.
"I'm not saying it does, Molly" he agrees, "however, it is understandable why it has happened. She's getting from Minerva what Ron should have been giving her all along, support, love and most importantly a partner that can help her raise the children, give them the life they deserve. I'm not saying I agree with their relationship, I'm sorry Mione, but it's going to take a while to get my head around this, but I'm going to support her decision if this is the route she wants to go down"
I reach across the table and grab Harry's hand. "Thank you Harry, for having my back, as always, however I really think I should answer Molly's last question" I say. I keep my hand in Harry's grasp and turn to look at Molly.
"Yes, I am falling in love with Minerva, a week after Rons passing. I believe that it happened so quickly because I loved her years ago. When I went to Hogwarts for my final year, I spent a lot of time with her, talking, dancing, drinking, really getting to know Minerva, instead of the professor or headmistress that most people don't get to see past. If I hadn't already been in a relationship with Ron, I have no doubt that we would have ended up together, and I think Ron sensed that in some peculiar way, which is why he told Minerva to stop our friendship, before I came to the realisation myself" I confess. "Being in her presence has just brought back all my old feelings, and whilst I realise the timing could be better, life is too short to waste on procrastinating over whether I should or should not be with her. She makes me happy, makes the children happy. I can't deny myself the opportunity for a life that could be everything I've ever wanted. Although I may have fucked it all up before we even got started" I finish quietly. I sigh.
"I'm not telling you this to hurt any of you, I'm not even doing it to get your blessing, although I would appreciate that, if you could find some way to accept this that would make things easier, but I am going to fight for her. If you can't accept it, I won't keep your grandkids from you, but I won't be around anymore, I won't have you looking down on me, making snide comments about my relationship. I want to be with Minerva,"
The room is silent as I finish. Harry gives my hand a squeeze in support. Molly is looking down at the table, taking in my words, mulling everything I've told her over. Ginny just nods at me.
"I don't need your decision today, think about it, talk about it. Discuss it with the kids if you must. Yes, Rose is aware, no she hasn't seen or heard anything….too intimate." I say as Molly cuts her eyes at me "but it is my intention, to begin exploring a relationship with Minerva, which will eventually lead to us moving into her manor in Scotland, and becoming a family unit. Now I have a favour to ask" I take a breath "can Rose and Hugo either stay here tonight, or with you Harry?" I ask "Minerva and I need to talk, and we can't do that properly with the kids around."
Molly is quick to answer, "of course the kids can stay here, they will always be welcomed".
"Thank you Molly." I stand from my chair. "I'm going to say goodbye and then I'm leaving" I announce.
I walk out of the kitchen and into the den. I call Rose to me.
"Rose, you and Hugo will be staying here tonight."
"But mom!" She interrupts
"No buts, Rose. Minerva and I have an important conversation that we need to have, about our future, and I can't have you there sweetie. Grandma may want to talk to you about this. I want you to be honest about your feelings, okay?"
I get a sullen nod, but I pull her in for a hug anyway. "I love you darling" I say as I release her.
"Hugo, I'll see you tomorrow, you'll be staying here with Rose tonight, okay?" I inform him as I pull him in for a hug too.
"Does Minerva not like us anymore?" He asks, tears beginning to form in his eyes.
"Oh, bumblebee, no that's not the reason. Mommy and Minerva just need to have a bit of a chat about a few things, and it'll be easier if we're alone for that discussion. I promise you, I'll be here tomorrow to pick you up." I gave him a kiss and wiped his eyes from the few tears that had fallen. "I love you" I whisper and walk away.
"Thank you for having them Molly, I appreciate it. I'll be by tomorrow to pick them up" I assure her. I grab my cloak from the back of the chair and walk out the door. I'm almost running to the apparition point to get back to Minerva, to tell her that I love her.
A bit full on that chapter, but at least it's all out in the open now. Reviews keep the muse happy.